New Life
by ChelseyKarrrm
Summary: "what the hell do you mean we're dead?" she asked with a frown. The doctor chuckled "you'll understand soon enough." Olivia wakes up in a hospital room and finds out that her entire world is about to be flipped upside down and there's nothing she can do to stop it. Follow her on her new journey with a companion that makes things a little complicated and interesting.
1. Chapter 1

**Dead****_._**

Olivia woke up feeling like she had been hit by a mack truck, her head hurt and she couldn't help but let out a groan due to the bright light that was glaring down at her. She rubbed her eyes slowly, trying to figure out where the hell she was and why it was so damn bright in there.

"ah it's good to see that you've woken up Olivia" a young looking guy said, after walking into the room.

Olivia shot him a glare "who the hell are you and where am I?"

He chuckled "you're a lot more aggressive than your boyfriend next door. You're at Mercy hospital Olivia and I am doctor Blake"

"first of all I don't have a boyfriend and secondly why am I here?" she asked a little less aggressively.

He stood beside her hospital bed "well you were shot Miss Benson. You and your friend were shot outside of the 16th precinct, and you are both dead as of now."

"What the hell do you mean we're dead?" she asked with a frown.

The doctor chuckled "you'll understand soon enough"

She sighed "can you atleast tell me who this friend you keep talking about is?"

The door to the room opened right after the question left her lips and she let out a groan of anger when she saw Trevor Langan step into the room with two US Marshals behind him. It didn't take a genius to put two and two together, and Olivia who had been a detective all her life had just figured everything out.

She looked over at the doctor and sighed "we're going into witness protection aren't we?"

One of the marshals stepped forward and nodded "you definitely are Miss Benson. You and Mr Langan over here were shot right outside of your work place and it's clear these guys will go to any lengths to kill both of you. So it'll be best if we get rid of you both for a while."

"Why would anybody want to kill us?" Trevor asked before sitting down in the vacant seat beside Olivia's bed, he was shot in his right shoulder and it hurt like a bitch.

Olivia rolled eyes "it's obviously because of our jobs, sherlock."

The Marshal chuckled "actually it's a bit more complicated than that. We suspect that it has something to do with the murder charges Mr Langan got you off from a few years ago."

Trevor sighed "great so because I helped you now I've got to give up my entire life for god only knows how long."

"I didn't ask you to defend me, asshole." she spat back "although I do appreciate it."

"alright that's enough flirting kids, you have to get some rest. We'll be back in the morning with your new clothes and identities, also I suggest you two make peace since you'll be married for a while."

Olivia and Trevor looked at each other with frowns, neither of them wanted this but they knew they couldn't back out. Unless they wanted to die.

Olivia sighed "as much as I hate you, I'd take being your wife over being dead."

Trevor chuckled "right back at you Benson."

The pair watched as the Marshals left the room and the doctor wheeled another bed into the room. He raised an eyebrow at Trevor "it'll be easier to keep our eyes on you two if you're in the same room, is that a problem?"

Olivia sighed "we probably don't have a choice."

The doctor smirked "smart lady. Now I suggest you two get some rest, I'll send a nurse with something for the pain and we'll check your wounds in the next few hours."

Trevor shuffled into the other bed and bit back the groan of pain that wanted to leave his lips. Olivia looked over and noticed the white patch covering his wound "they got your shoulder huh?"

He nodded "yeah, where'd they get you?"

She shrugged "I have no idea, I don't have any pain so I doubt they got me."

Doctor Blake chuckled "they hit you on your right side, we had to do an emergency operation to remove the bullet before it travelled. That's why you can't feel much, the medication hasn't worked out of your system yet."

She moved her hand down the right side of her body and groaned "great so I have a massive bruise here now. Those guys really need to work on their aim."

Trevor chuckled "if they worked on their aim we'd be dead."

She tried to stifle her laugh "I didn't think about that, sometimes the detective in me over rules my common sense."

He looked over at her with a smirk "Benson laughing, who would of thought I'd ever hear that sound."

She scoffed "you make me sound bitter. I laugh all the time, just not with you."

He raised an eyebrow at her and shot her a wink "you'll have to change that attitude, wife"

She rolled her eyes "I'm not your wife yet"

"but you will be soon" he said with a laugh.

She glared at him "stop making it sound so official Langan. We're nothing to each other, we just have to act like we're married."

He laid back and sighed "you better work on those acting skills then, cause I can smell how much you hate me without even looking at you."

"I don't hate you..." she said with a sigh "I hate your job. I hate that you defend rapists, how can a perfectly normal person defend such horrible people?"

He looked over at her and let out a breath that he didn't realise he was holding "I'm able to do it because I don't take the job home with me. It's just an occupation to me, I could walk out anyday and not feel a thing. That's the difference between us, you live your job and I don't."

She sat back and thought about what he said, he was right. She lived her job, it was her life, if only he knew why. For him it was probably all about the money, and it made her sick that he would go to that extent for money.

She sighed "we should get some sleep."

He nodded "you're right. We have a long day ahead of us tomorrow."

...

Olivia and Trevor were up early the next morning awaiting the arrival of the US Marshals, both of them cranky and irritated due to pain. Olivia took the meds doctor Blake brought and massaged her temples "how much longer do we have to wait?"

Doctor Blake shrugged "they said they'd be here in the next twenty minutes."

Trevor groaned "this is already pissing me off and we didn't even leave yet."

She looked over at him "did they say where we'll be staying?"

The Marshals walked into the room, making sure nobody noticed them "change into these and we'll be on our way."

Olivia and Trevor took the clothes handed to them and looked at the other people in the room "is there a bathroom I can change in?" Olivia pipped up.

Doctor Blake pointed to the door at one end of the room "right in there, you have to be quick though because your husband has to use it too."

She rolled her eyes at the word 'husband', but she knew she'd have to get used to it, who knows how long they would be in witness protection. It could take weeks, months or even years. She shuddered at the thought of leaving everything and everyone behind for years and then having to come back one day and pick up the pieces that she left behind.

She let out a breath and stared at herself in the mirror "guess this is the last day of being Olivia..."

A single tear slipped down her cheek as she stripped out of the hospital gown. She slipped on the jeans they brought and the baby blue blouse, it was extremely different to the clothes she usually wore. She would never walk into a store and buy anything like this, she sighed.

She walked out of the bathroom and felt her eyes well up with tears when they told her to remove her fearlessness necklace. That necklace got her through so much and it meant the world to her, it was a gift from her mother. The only thing she had left of her mother was that necklace and now she'd have to take it off for god knows how long.

She unclasped the necklace and slipped it into the brown bag the Marshals held out. They'd have it with them for safe keeping, until this was all over.

Trevor went into the bathroom and got his pants on without any issues, it was when he had to slip on his t-shirt that he let out a loud groan of pain. Olivia turned to look at the bathroom and sighed "he probably can't get the t-shirt on because of his shoulder."

The Marshal smirked "well then go and help him, he is your husband after all."

She sighed before walking over to the bathroom and knocking softly "do you need any help with your t-shirt?"

"I'm a grown man, I can dress myself" he said with a scowl, still trying to slip the sweater on.

She rolled her eyes before walking over to him and helping him with the t-shirt "you were shot, it's okay to need help. Plus we've got to get used to being civil with each other."

He sighed "you're right, it's just a difficult transition."

She nodded "tell me about it. After we leave this hospital we won't be Olivia and Trevor anymore. We'll have a completely different life and it's fucking insane."

He stood up and gave her a gentle pat on the shoulder "come on Benson, let's go out there before they assume that we're having sex in here."

She chuckled as she followed him out "they probably think it already."

The US Marshals took all of their personal belongings and any distinctive jewellery that could be connected to Olivia and Trevor before leading them out of the back of the hospital. Olivia felt her heart drop when she heard yelling coming from down the corridor, she knew those voices anywhere.

Fin, Cragen and Elliot were all heard shouting at one of the doctors trying to figure out why they couldn't see her body. Trevor noticed the pained look on her face and let out a breath before placing a comforting hand on her shoulder "it'll be okay."

She looked up at him and forced a smile, her lips pressed together while she willed her eyes not to well up again "I know."

They slipped into the black van and let out a breath of relief because they made it out unnoticed.

One of the US Marshals handed each of them an envelope "okay so we can finally tell you where you're heading now that we're alone."

Olivia furrowed her eyebrows "wait so if you don't trust doctor Blake why would you let him know that we're alive?"

He sighed "we do trust doctor Blake, it's just that we can't have anybody but us knowing where you are. Those guys could find out that doctor Blake dealt with your bodies and go after him, and we are not willing to take the chance of him outing your location to save his life."

Trevor nodded "makes sense, so where are we going?"

"Durham, North Carolina." the other us marshal pipped up.

Olivia gasped "that's an eight hour drive away"

"exactly why you're going there, we don't want you to be that far out but you will be staying in a very quiet little street. Your new cards, liscenses and cell phones are all in that bag." he motioned to the brown bags in their hands.

The other marshal looked up and smirked "Trevor, you are now Mister Michael Connor" he looked over at Olivia who scowled as she read over the file "Olivia, you are his wife, Misses Julia Connor nee Riley."

She let out a breath "that's a horrible name."

Trevor chuckled "oh come Juls, you'll get used to it eventually."

She narrowed her eyes at him "shut up Mike"

They took out the cellphones and checked the numbers that were saved. Both of them looking confused as they read the names they didn't notice. Olivia looked up at the Marshal "who is Price?"

"that's my number and the one that's saved under Burns is his number" he said while pointing to the other Marshal.

Burns handed them each another file "this has all your personal details, birthdays, ages and everything. We gave you two the freedom to make up a story of how you met, and also where you're both originally from. You should have no relation to New York and to any of your past jobs."

Trevor read his file and narrowed his eyes "this can't be right, it says that i'm a History teacher. I haven't taught a class in my entire life"

Price chuckled "you'll figure it out, plus we've got a number of textbooks in your new home that'll help you. Mike has taught at three schools before and they have already forwarded a review of him to the high school you'll be working at. Julia is an English teacher at the same school, we didn't want to split you two up incase anything happens you'll be together."

Olivia nodded "I can handle that, I did an English major but that was years ago"

He nodded "we know you did, and we have enough study material to refresh your memory. You'll be working at Geth Lake High School, it's a thirty minute drive from your home in North Street."

Trevor sighed "wow so this is really happening."

Burns chuckled "sure is. Now there are two families there who have been in witness protection for many years and decided to stay and build a life for themselves. The first family lives directly next to you, they are Kevin and Alicia Reynolds, they've been in wp, for eight years and they have four kids. The other family is Jerry and Louise, they've been in wp for five years and they have twin daughter. You can contact them at any time and they will help you. If you need anything they are your go to people."

The rest of the drive was quiet, all they did was read through their files and listen to the instructions of Price and Burns. Both of them knew this wasn't going to be easy but they had no other choice. Atleast they had the hope of returning home someday and getting to see the people they love again.


	2. Chapter 2

**Adjust**

Olivia and Trevor stepped out of the van and sighed as they stood on the front porch of their new home, this was it. There was no going back now, until the guys behind everything was caught.

They followed the Marshals into the home and looked around, both of them taking in how much it looked like they'd been living there for years. Trevor noticed a picture on the fire place and walked over to inspect it, he smirked when he saw that it was their wedding photo. It was all so real, everything looked perfectly real, until you sat down with Olivia and him and realised that they know absolutely nothing about each other.

Olivia walked over after noticing that he spaced out while staring at the picture on the fire place, she looked at it and swallowed the lump that arose in her throat "we look like an actual couple there"

He nodded "that's the freaky part, they even took the time to give you a beautiful dress and an updo. Look at how close our faces are"

She chuckled "it's a cute picture though. We look like a happy couple, I just hope we'll be able to sell it to the outside world."

"Our lives depend on it." he said with a sigh before moving around and looking at a few other photos.

Olivia turned to the Marshals and smirked "you guys really went through a lot of effort for all of this."

"Well we had to make it look as real as possible, so if you get any visitors eventually, they won't ask any questions. Also there's an entire photo album in the closet in your bedroom, it's filled with wedding photos and other photos over the years. You two get to decide how long you've been married though and we left an empty album incase you decide to take a few new pictures." Price said before tossing each of them a set of keys.

"those are your car keys, everything you need is here. We even left a few numbers of takeout places nearby, you have your credit cards and your wallets." Burns said while walking to the door.

Trevor stopped them "I just have one question. It's about my money, I usually give my mother a sum of money each month cause she's too old to work. Would it be possible to give her some of the money from my bank account?"

Price shook his head "no, your funds are all frozen actually. We won't be giving it to a beneficiary because trust me, you'll need it when you get back some day. We can however get a sum of money for her and say that it's money paid to your next of keen since you're officially dead."

He nodded "I don't care what you decide to do, just make sure she's sorted and taken care of."

Burns smirked "you got it Mike."

They watched the Marshals leave and immediately set to checking the place out properly. Olivia went into the kitchen and checked the cupboards, a smirk on her lips when she noticed that they stocked up enough groceries for atleast two or three days.

The house was quite big for only two people, it had three bedrooms, two bathrooms and an ensuite in the main bedroom. The kitchen was extremely big and even had a gorgeous island in the center of it, they had a dinning room with a table for about six to eight people and a living room completed with comfy sofas and a cute little coffee table.

She sat down opposite him and threw the contents from the brown bag onto the counter "so I've got license, a ton of cards, lip gloss, a very feminine wallet and what I'm assuming is house keys. What do you have?"

He emptied his bag and chuckled "I've got license, a few cards, a wallet and also house keys" he looked up at her and let out a chuckle "they also gave me condoms."

She rolled her eyes "they really think we're going to have sex"

He shrugged "they clearly don't know how much we dislike each other."

She let out a sigh before checking her wallet "I've got about $300 in here, also they said we have five grand on each of our cards."

"great, I've got $300 in my wallet too." he dropped his car keys into the bowl on the table and grabbed the bag with their medication in it "we should probably eat something and then get some rest. We have to go shopping for clothes and toiletries soon."

She shrugged "we can do the shopping tomorrow, I'm going to shower."

Trevor shrugged "no problem, should I order a pizza or something?"

"Yeah whatever you feel for, I'm not really fussy" she hollered.

...

Trevor couldn't help but smirk when he took in her appearance, he always found her beautiful but she looked even more so now. She wore a baggy sweater and pair of leggings, and her hair was tied back in a ponytail.

She noticed him staring and scowled "just cause we're married doesn't mean you can stare me down like that Langan."

"Well as your husband I should have the legal right to do it." he joked before handing her a cup of coffee "it's just weird for me to be seeing you in different clothes, and when I say different I mean anything that's not a blouse and pair of black slacks."

She took the cup and gave him a small smile "thank you, and I get it. It's weird for me too, seeing you in jeans and a t-shirt. We'll get used to everything eventually, I just hope this ends sooner rather than later."

"it would be great if they caught those guys soon but I'm actually looking forward to this, a change of scenery can do both of us good"

She sat down on the sofa and scoffed "you don't know that, atleast not about me. I was happy doing my job, I was happy with my squad."

He sighed "I get all of that, but were you happy with your life as a whole. Even when you got to your apartment, was that happiness still there. Because it sure as hell wasn't for me, even going in to the office was an effort."

She thought about his words for a few minutes, she wasn't happy away from her squad and her job. She came home to an empty apartment every night and she didn't have any friends that weren't work colleagues as well. The more she thought about it, the more she realised how lonely she was.

She took a sip of the coffee he prepared for her "you've got a point, I still miss home though."

He sat back and stared down at the gold bands that were laying on the coffee table, he knew they'd have to keep those safe. He missed home too, even though he lived in his massive apartment alone, he missed the life of luxury.

Olivia looked up at him "this must be weird for you, a small house, no fancy clothes."

"It's nothing I haven't experienced before, I didn't grow up rich and with the perfect family. My life was nothing like what most people picture it to have been."

Her eyebrows knitted together in curiosity "what was it like? Your life, growing up?"

He took a deep breathe "well for the first few years that I can remember it was always just my mom, my brother, my sister and me. We were happy and had all the love in the world, until my mom met someone. I was about seven years old when she married my stepdad Keith, my brother Thomas was four and Tiffany was only two years old. My father died two weeks before Tiffany was born, he was the most amazing person I knew. My stepdad however wasn't as loving, he didn't really like us much because we weren't his kids."

He cleared his throat, a look of pure disgust covered his face "he used to beat my mother up every night calling her whore because she had children before she met him. I remember one night I tried to help my mother, I was only twelve but I figured maybe if he started hitting me he would leave her alone. I was wrong, he beat the crap out of me and lashed out on the rest of the family as well, even Tiffany. From that night my everyday life was filled with abuse from him, I would take it just so that he didn't hurt my brother and sister."

Olivia moved to sit beside him when he got a bit choked up "why didn't your mother leave him?"

He shrugged "I don't know... I guess she loved him or something."

"How long did the abuse continue?" she asked cautiously.

"until he died when I was seventeen." he said with a frown.

"What happened to him? What was the cause of death?" she asked with a sad look on her face.

"My mother killed him, she didn't mean it though. He just... He"

She placed her hand on his shoulder in a comforting way "take your time"

He pulled himself together and continued after a few minutes "he raped my sister, she was twelve and he forced himself onto her. I couldn't do anything to stop him because I was passed out after he hit me over the head, and Thomas wasn't home. My mom came home to find me laying on the ground in a puddle of my own blood, she then went into the bedroom and found him on top of my sister, with his hand over her mouth and that was the last straw. She grabbed the wooden bed post cap and hit him over the head with it, she didn't mean to kill him though."

"Trevor I'm so sorry, I didn't know... How is Tiffany and Thomas doing now?"

He allowed a single tear to roll down his face "Thomas doesn't speak to me or my mother, he moved out at the age of eighteen and went to live with a friend in California, I haven't seen him ever since and Tiffany, she..." he wiped his tears before sitting back and looking up at the ceiling "my mother went to prison for murdering Keith and I raised Tiffany for three years... Then she, She hung herself in my bedroom at the age of fifteen... and no matter how many years go by, every year on the 17th of July I see her hanging there... lifeless all over again."

Olivia let out a breath as she watched his tears fall, she didn't really know what to do or say and that was new to her. She didn't know if she should hug him or hold his hand, she just knew that she had to help him get over the pain he was feeling.

She took his hand, and gave it a gentle squeeze "it's okay, let it out." she whispered.

Trevor pulled himself together after ten minutes and wiped his tears away, he was embarrassed that he cried infront of her but he knew she wouldn't judge him. He looked up at her and let out a breath "I'm going to shower, the pizza should be here in about ten minutes."

She nodded "I'll get it and then we can head to bed. Our interviews is in two days and we need decent clothes"

He squeezed her hand that was still holding his "we're gonna get through this Olivia. Then we'll return home to our lives and it'll all be worth it."

"I know" she whispered.

...

"Juls please just take a shirt." he said as he watched her search through the mass amount of female clothes.

They needed to get something for their upcoming interviews, but Olivia was having an issue deciding on what to choose. She wanted something that didn't scream Olivia Benson, but she couldn't find anything to meet her tastes.

She scowled at Trevor as he complained "Mike just give me a minute. I'll find something soon"

He sighed "fine, but you're not allowed to complain if take my time too."

She caught sight of the woman watching them in the isle and gave him the sweetest smile she could muster "of course honey."

Trevor rolled his eyes discreetly, this irritated him as much as it irritated her. She was beautiful yes, but he still wasn't a big fan of hers, even though she supported him after he opened up and didn't judge him.

She finally found something and smirked "do you think this'll work?"

He looked at the dress she was holding out and smirked "it'll be a pleasure seeing you in a dress again darling" he said with a sickly sweet smile.

The older lady in the isle turned to them and smiled "I don't mean to invade but you two are just the cutest little couple I've ever seen. How long have you been married?"

"Six years" both of them pipped up.

Olivia slipped her hand into his and forced a smile "we've been married for six years now and I couldn't be happier."

The older woman beamed with joy "I'm so happy for you two, you look beautiful together. I don't mean to invade but do you have any kids?"

Olivia felt her stomach drop at the question, how could they ever explain why they didn't have a kid after being married for six whole years. She shook her head slowly "no we don't. We're not really ready for kids yet, right honey?"

He nodded "that's right. We're just enjoying our marriage for now, maybe after a few years we'll have a kid."

They left the Isle and headed to the men's section of the store, both of them letting out a breath of relief. She looked at him and shook her head "how the hell are we going to sell this marriage thing?"

He took her hand and gave it a squeeze "don't you give up on me Benson. We'll figure it out, we're in this together."


	3. Chapter 3

**Boundaries.**

Olivia and Trevor came back from their interviews, both of them ecstatic about the fact that they actually got accepted. Olivia handed him a beer as she sat down beside him on the sofa, they were looking through the albums the Marshals left and smirked at how real the pictures looked.

"thank you" Trevor said as he took the beer from her, he pointed to a picture of them sitting next to each other at what looked like a bar or something.

Olivia chuckled "we look so possessive in this picture... I hooked you in and your hand is on my knee, please shoot me if I'm ever that possessive"

Trevor stifled a laugh "if you are ever that possessive I doubt that it'll be with me. Probably your boyfriend, what's his name?"

She rolled her eyes "wow you really need to get your information updated, Brian and I never dated."

"What about Elliot? Surely you miss him?" he asked cautiously.

She scowled "what about him? Of course I miss him, he was my partner for the last ten years. He was my best friend and I loved him... As a friend."

He could see that there was more to it than she was letting on but he decided to leave her be, it wasn't his place to be prying after all.

A knock on the door pulled him out of his thoughts, he got up and smirked "I'll get the door, you can keep looking through this if you want."

"thanks, are we expecting someone though?" she asked cautiously.

He shook his head "no, we're not expecting anybody."

He went over to the door and opened it, a small smile on his on his face when he saw two beautiful women standing at the door "hi"

One of the women smiled brightly at him "hey there, you must be the new neighbour, my sister and I heard about your arrival a few days ago and decided to come over and say hi."

He smiled "well that's nice of you, my name is Michael by the way"

She extended her hand to him "I'm Bethany and this is my sister Alicia".

Alicia took his hand and gave it a good shake, while her eyes explored his body "it's lovely to meet you Michael."

Olivia noticed that Trevor had been at the door for quite a few minutes and decided to check it out, she got up and walked up behind him "Mike who is it?"

He turned to her and smiled "it's just two of our neighbours who came to say hi, that's Bethany and this is her sister Alicia. Ladies this is my wife Julia."

Olivia noticed the way both of their smiles faded as soon as he said the word _'wife'_ and she immediately knew that these two women were going to have an issue with her. She shook each of their hands and forced a smile "hi it's so nice to meet you both."

Alicia nodded, her eyes focused on their the way they reacted to each other, Trevor pulled Olivia into his side and gave her the most loving smile he could muster before looking back at her and Bethany.

"So we have to leave now, but we're having a barbecue this weekend and you're both welcome to join us. That way you'll get to meet everybody else." Bethany said while Alicia just kept staring at them.

Olivia looked up at Trevor and smiled "that sounds great, right honey?"

He nodded "sure does. What time?"

"2pm, don't be late" Alicia said with a flirtatious wink.

Olivia noticed, but she didn't really care much since they weren't really married.

Trevor nodded "we'll be there."

Bethany smirked "well then it was good to meet you Mike" she looked over at Olivia and gave a forced smile that Olivia could clearly see "and you... Uhm"

"Julia" Trevor pipped up, he too noticed that both women were disappointed at the mention of him having a wife.

Bethany nodded "yeah, nice to meet both you"

Olivia nodded with a smirk on her face "likewise."

They stood in the doorway, still in each others embrace until the women left. Olivia removed her arm that was wrapped around his back and smiled up at him "they seemed to have bought the whole marriage story."

He removed his arm from around her shoulders and closed the door "they did and that's a good sign. Now we just have to put up even better act on Saturday and stick to our stories."

She nodded "I'm sure we'll be able to do it, right _honey_?"

He chuckled before going into the kitchen "absolutely _darling_" he teased, he turned to her once both of their laughter eased down "I feel like cooking, you want anything?"

She raised an eyebrow "you cook?"

"Yeah I love cooking. Before I became a lawyer I wanted to be a chef but I changed my mind at the last minute... I've been cooking since a young age because my mother was certain that Keith was going to kill her so she taught us in case we ended up on our own."

She sat on the island and watched as he moved around the kitchen "was she a good cook?"

He shook his head and let out a chuckle "no she wasn't. She only knew the basics and she was horrible at that even, but I took an interest in it and got a few cook books and taught myself most of the other recipes I know. Do you cook?"

She shook her head "no. I never learnt, my mom couldn't really teach me and I hardly had time to cook with my detectives job. I basically lived on tackouts."

He turned to her with a serious look on his face "I could teach you if you want?"

She looked down and picked at her nails nervously, she wouldn't mind learning but she didn't want to spend more time with him than she already was. She could literally feel the hate she had for him dissipating with each passing day and she wasn't looking to speed up the process.

_Stop being a dumbass Olivia, he's not asking for sex. He's willing to teach you a skill that will benefit you when you get back home, and if you let loose one day and start a family you'll be able to give them more than takeouts. _

She sighed as her thoughts kept plaguing her, she looked up at him and gave him a small smile "I'd like that, if it's not too much work."

He noticed that she had an internal war but decided not to ask about it "it won't be too much work."

...

Olivia and Trevor headed to a nearby shopping centre to buy a few groceries for the meals he planned on teaching her and also because they needed a few toiletries.

She reached for the bowl of cerial and sighed as she listened to Trevor as he spoke to Alicia in the Isle. They ran into the sisters a few Isles down and were now being followed by the chattering pair.

"Mike what do you do for a living?" Alicia asked while twirling a piece of her black hair around her fingers.

"I'll be starting at the local primary school next month. I'm a history teacher."

She frowned slightly "well that's no fun. History is such a dull subject."

Olivia smirked as she wrapped her arm around his middle, she had an urge to spike up jealousy in the black haired woman, she didn't know what came over her but she felt a need to mark her territory.

_He is not your territory Liv. Stop it._

She shook her head gently to dismiss her plaguing thoughts "well Mike really has a way with words, he can make even the dullest subject fun."

Trevor looked down at her and raised an eyebrow at her, he didn't know where this sudden change of attitude came from but he wasn't going to protest. A part of him even thought that she was jealous for a second, but that would be absurd. They meant nothing to each other.

He took her hand and squeezed it gently "Leave it to Juls to find a way to make me feel great about myself."

She winked up at "well I have to make sure my man knows that I adore him."

Trevor noticed how she accentuated the _'my man'_ bit, he knew not to get his hopes up but her behaviour was confusing him.

"How long have you two known each other? You know, before marriage" Alicia asked, quickly changing the subject.

Trevor shrugged "we know each other for nine years and we've been married for six of those nine years."

She nodded "so you two got married after knowing each other for only three years? That's a bit quick wasn't it?"

Olivia shook her head and forced a smile "not at all. We were friends for a year before we started dating and then after a year we got engaged and then got married a few months later. We've been happy ever since."

Bethany finally joined the group and forced a smile as she stared at the couple's joint hands "what did I miss?"

Alicia turned to her and smirked "Beth do you know that Julia and Mike only know each other for nine years now?"

She smirked "no I didn't. That's a long time."

Trevor sighed "anyway ladies, we have to leave now. We'll see you two on Saturday"

Olivia was thankful that he finally said that, she was tired of the sisters and wanted to go home with her husband already.

_He is not your husband, he's Julia's husband. You're Olivia not Julia._

She frowned, her thoughts making her want to scream. She didn't know what was happening to her but she didn't like it one bit, she was never one to get her feelings confused with reality but it was difficult right now.

She assured herself with the fact that she was only this possessive of him because he was all she had left of her past life. He was all she had left of New York, he was the only person she could speak to about how much she missed home, even though she wouldn't open up to him anytime soon.

He gave her hand a slight squeeze when he noticed that she spaced out, her eyes were shining with tears "you ready to go?"

She looked up at him and nodded "yeah we've got everything we need."

He gently pulled her into his side and gave her a small smile "goodbye ladies."

Olivia looked up at him and smiled too, she knew that was his way of assuring her that everything was going to be okay.

They said their greetings before going to a nearby cash register and paying for their goods. Olivia followed silently to his car and smirked as he loaded the trunk after opening the car for her. She knew he wasn't acting when he did these little gentlemen like things, it was part of his persona, and all these years she had been thinking that he was a self-centred asshole. She definitely saw him in a new light now, a better light, but that didn't change the fact that they meant nothing to each other.

The drive home was silent as neither of them knew what to say, Olivia spent most of her time on her cellphone, searching for any news on her squad. She sighed when she found nothing "do you ever miss your firm?"

He looked over at her for a second before averting his attention back to the road "yeah, I miss it all the time. I spent most of my life in that place, and I had a few great friends in the firm."

She raised an eyebrow "no girlfriend? I always thought you'd be the type to take women home everynight."

"hey don't get me wrong, I've had one or two ventures but I never really took people home with me, I had my share of one night stands, but that was years ago. I couldn't really allow myself to be with anybody after my engagement ended."

She frowned "you were engaged? When?"

He thought about it for a minute "yeah I was, two years ago. I had been dating this girl Liza for a year and I thought she was the one, we got engaged and two weeks before our wedding she ran off with one of the bridesmaids."

"I'm so sorry, I never knew about that. Wait, a bridesmaid?" she asked with a hint of confusion.

"Yeah a bridesmaid, her mother told me that she was a lesbian long before we met and they practically forced her onto me, and she went along with it until the thought of spending her life with a man scared her off. It's okay though, I got over it, and I haven't really dated anyone ever since then." he said with a shrug "oh and nobody knew because I didn't really tell anybody about the engagement."

She nodded "I get it... I've never been engaged before but I've been in some serious relationships that I preferred to keep to myself. A few, not even Elliot knew about."

He let out a surprised laugh "I thought you two told each other everything."

She let out a breath "we told each other almost everything but there was a few things that I preferred not to share. We were extremely close but we knew our limits, especially since so many people thought that we were dating, or harbouring a secret relationship."

He pursed his lips, an attempt to stop himself from asking her anything too personal. He sighed softly before glancing at her, it was obvious that she missed her squad dearly, more so Elliot.

She turned to him and gave him a kind smile "thank you"

He shot her a confused glance "what for?"

"for not over-stepping our unspoken boundaries." she said with a genuine smile.

He nodded "I'm not as much of an ass that you think I am. I would never say or do anything to hurt you, or even upset you. You're all I've got out here and I don't plan on making things unpleasant for both of us."

She looked at him and let out a breath she didn't know she was holding back, a small smile tugging at her lips. She didn't expect him to be a kind person, in her mind he was always the enemy. Even now, she kept her distance because she feared that he would turn out to be like the assholes he defended daily. He was proving her wrong with each passing day, and breaking down the walls she built to keep people out.


	4. Chapter 4

**Pry.**

Olivia walked downstairs wearing a sweatshirt and a pair of leggings, she just came from the shower and felt a massive sense of peace coming over her.

Trevor raised an eyebrow at her as he took in her appearance "you want a cup of coffee?"

She nodded "yes please."

He turned around and fixed a cup of coffee for her "is this how you usually dress before a day out?"

She chuckled "no, I just feel more comfortable like this."

He handed her the cup of coffee "oh, well I think the leggings are cute."

She looked up at him with a smirk "are they really though?"

He placed his cup of coffee down and nodded "Yeah, it's actually really fucking sexy."

She placed her cup down beside his and stepped closer to him "well I think you're really fucking sexy."

He pulled her toward him and leaned down to capture her lips in a passionate kiss, she wrapped her arms around his neck and nibbled on his lower lip before breaking the kiss "what do you say we take this party upstairs?"

She nodded, not a single second of doubt going through her mind, she let out a soft giggle as he picked her up bridal style and carried her up to the main bedroom. He laid her gently on the bed and smirked as she let out a soft moan when his lips attached to her neck.

"Trevor don't tease me" she whispered before allowing her hands to travel to his pants.

He took hold of her hands and pinned it down above her head "no touching Olivia, I'm in charge"

She felt the wetness pool between her legs as she listened to him, she bit her lip before nodding "you're in charge"

He kissed his way down her body and quickly pulled her leggings down, his lips covering her lace covered mound, sending electricity through her body.

She stirred slowly, her hand reaching down to tangle into his hair, she squinted when she found nobody between her legs. She reached up and rubbed her eyes before looking around the room, her eyes adjusting to the darkness.

She got out of the bed and headed to the shower, she could not believe that she had a steamy dream about Trevor of all people. It wasn't the first time though, she let out a sigh "great now you're dreaming about sex with him. Well done Liv." she whispered to herself before getting up and heading into the bathroom.

She took a long hot shower before stepping out and walking back into her room wrapped in her towel, she walked over to the wardrobe but stopped when she saw Trevor standing in the doorway.

"Trevor, what are you doing here?" she asked with a confused look, as she pulled the towel tighter around her body.

He averted his gaze from her cleavage that was popping out from the top of her towel "I uhm, I couldn't sleep and then I heard noise coming from your room. I came to check if everything is okay"

"oh" she nodded, taking in his attire. He stood in the doorway in nothing but his boxer briefs, her mind rushed back to her steamy dream as she stared at his naked torso.

_My god, his abs look absolutely devine. I wonder if he's as big as he looks. I wonder if he would bend me all the way over and take..._

She shook her head gently, to rid herself of her dirty thoughts, but her flushed face gave it all away.

She forced her eyes away from his naked body and smiled awkwardly "well I'm okay, thanks for checking."

He nodded, equally as awkward, he too had an extremely detailed dream of her and had to take a cold shower to help with the painful hard on that remained. He looked away from her cleavage and smiled "I uhm, I will be downstairs. Do you want some coffee?"

"No!" she said a bit louder than she expected, both of them were shocked by her tone "I'm sorry, yes I'd love some coffee. Thank you."

"no problem" he said before walking out of the room.

She let out a breath of relief before walking to the wardrobe and getting some comfy clothes.

...

"So why were you up at such an early hour?" he asked as he handed her the cup of coffee.

Olivia sat down beside him and took the cup of coffee "thank you, and I couldn't sleep... I had uhm, a disturbing dream"

"a nightmare?" he asked with a frown.

She shrugged "well as a detective I saw some gruesome things and they tend to haunt my memories more often than not."

Lying didn't come easy for her, but she couldn't exactly open up to him and tell him that she had a wet dream about him and needed to take a long shower to calm herself down. No, he would never find out.

He nodded "do you take anything to help you sleep?"

"I don't need sleeping pills Trevor, I can sleep, I just get bad dreams occasionally" she laughed.

"hey I'm just trying to help" he raised his hands in surrender.

She smiled up him "and I appreciate it. So why were you awake?"

"I just couldn't sleep, and then when I heard the sounds I had to make sure you were okay. You're not my favourite person in the world but I do care enough to make sure you're okay." he said with a chuckle.

She bit her lip, she didn't expect his words to have such an effect on her, but they did. She felt like absolute crap, as soon as the words left his lips.

She forced a smile "the feelings mutual Langan, I don't exactly like having to spend all this time with you but I'd take it over being hunted down and murdered."

He too didn't expect her words to affect him that much, he didn't expect to feel slightly hurt by the fact that she didn't like spending time with him. He didn't like that he lied and said that he doesn't like her, it was a bunch of bullshit and he knew it. He absolutely adored her, she was strong, intelligent, fiesty, smart and so many more things that he willed himself not to think of. He always adored her, from the moment he met her.

The pair sat in silence for a while until they heard a knock on their front door. Olivia shot him a concerned look "who could be at the door this time of the morning?"

He shrugged "I don't know but I'll check, stay here"

She nodded "Trev"

He turned to face her "yeah?"

"Be careful" she whispered.

He gave her a small smile before walking toward the door and checking the little peep hole. He frowned when he saw who it was and unlocked the door instantly "Bethany, Alicia, what brings you around this time of the morning." He asked, noticing the guy that stood behind them.

Bethany shivered slightly "can we come in? it's quite cold out here"

He stepped aside "sure, why were you out there at this hour?"

Alicia shrugged as they followed him toward the living room where Julia sat drinking a cup of coffee "this is our cousin Lukas, we were all up playing a game of darts when we noticed your light going on and off. We just came to make sure everything is okay."

Olivia forced a smile as they sat down "morning Bethany, Alicia. It's nice to meet you Lukas."

Lukas took her hand and kissed the back of it gently "nice to meet you too, you must be Julia."

She smirked "how did you know that?"

He sat down opposite her and shrugged "the girls were telling me that we had new neighbours and told me all they know about y'all."

She nodded "oh that's lovely."

Trevor sat down beside her and forced another smile "it's really nice to know that we have neighbours looking out for us."

"We really like y'all so we tend to get a bit protective." Alicia said with a sweet smile.

Olivia stood up "would you guys like some coffee perhaps?"

Bethany nodded "that would be lovely, two sugars for me, no sugar for Alicia."

"I'll take four sugars please" Lukas said while allowing his eyes to take in her appearance.

Trevor noticed Lukas staring and shot him a glare before smiling up at Olivia "babe can you get me some too?"

She smiled "of course honey"

Bethany stood up as well and smiled sweetly at Olivia "I'll help you, that way you and I can get to know each other better."

Olivia forced a smile, even though she really wanted to throw them out of the house by force, but she couldn't do that. It wouldn't be polite "sure"

She followed Olivia to the kitchen and filled the kettle while Olivia got some cups from the kitchen cupboards. A mischievous smirk on her face as she looked around "your kitchen is beautiful Julia, it looks as if you've never cooked in it"

Olivia chuckled "I don't cook in it much, Mike loves cooking so he does that and I just clean it up."

"Mike can cook?" She smirked "you're a lucky lady, it seems as if he can do everything."

She scoffed "he is great and all but he can't do everything. I do appreciate the things he does though..."

"Please spare me the humble speech, I'm sure it must be great to have a husband who doesn't only look delicious but also knows his way around the kitchen. I've dated some cool guys before but none of them could cook, so I ended up doing everything." She said while taking a seat at the Island.

Olivia bit back the scoff that threatened to leave her throat, she had to play it cool even though she really just wanted them to leave.

She raised an eyebrow at Bethany and decided that maybe she could take the opportunity to get to know her a little better "well I guess then I am lucky. So do you have a type when it comes to guys?"

She picked at her nails and shrugged "I do prefer my men to be tall, dark and handsome. I love a tall man, with brown eyes and gorgeous hair, Alicia just likes any guy with green eyes and muscles."

"Mmm I get that, I myself do prefer a certain tall man. Are you or Alicia in relationships at the moment?" She asked cautiously, hoping that Bethany wouldn't catch on to the fact that she was baiting her.

"Oh no. The last time I was in a relationship was a year ago and Alicia hasn't been in a relationship for three years now. I can't even remember the last time I had sex, you're so lucky that you're married so you can just have sex whenever you want."

Olivia shuffled uncomfortably at the topic and it didn't go unnoticed by Bethany, she quickly pulled herself together and forced what felt like her hundredth smile "yeah, I really am."

_If only you all knew that I haven't had sex in three years either, and I definitely won't be having sex anytime soon._

Bethany smirked "I don't mean to pry but why don't you and Mike have any kids?"

She shrugged "we're not ready for kids yet and we are not trying for kids. We're just enjoying our marriage for now."

"When you say you're not trying does that mean you aren't having sex at all?"

Olivia frowned at her bold question, she couldn't believe the nerve this woman had "I don't think that's any of your business Bethany."

"Okay can I ask, is it because he's not good in bed, what's the real reason. It's clear to see that you're frustrated so he definitely isn't meeting your needs."

She now openly scowled at Bethany who sat smirking at her, she didn't know what to say but she definitely didn't want to talk about her nonexistent sex life with her fake husband.

Trevor walked into the kitchen and furrowed his eyebrows when he saw Olivia shoot death glares at a smirking Bethany "I just came to check if you needed any help, you ladies were taking forever."

Olivia's eyes snapped away from Bethany and focused on Trevor, her face immediately softened "we were just having a little chat darling."

"Oh, am I allowed to ask what it was about?" He said with a smirk.

She shook her head before pulling him closer to her "it's just a bit of girl talk, nothing that'll interest you."

He wrapped his arms around her waist and smiled down at her, noticing how Bethany was watching them like a hawk. He nodded gently "I'll take your word for that babe, but please hurry up."

She nodded "yeah our conversation is over so I'll be right there and the coffees are ready."

He let go of her and took two of the cups "I'll take these, you bring those two."

"You got it hun." She said before taking the two other cups and taking it to the living room with Bethany following silently behind her.

Bethany shot her a cheeky smirk "you didn't answer me Julia."

"I told you that it's none of your business and I expect you to respect my privacy." She spat back with a scowl.

They returned to living room and Trevor could see that Olivia was irritated, he took her hand and gave it a squeeze "are you alright Juls?"

She shot him a glare, she was absolutely seething at the fact that Bethany had the nerve to cross question her like that.

"I'm fine" she said through gritted teeth.

Trevor raised an eyebrow at her, not buying her story but he decided that it would be best if he let her be. He turned back to the three people seated opposite them and gave them each a smile, trying to think of something that would get them to leave sooner rather than later.

"Lukas do you live around here too?" Olivia asked, breaking the tense silence in the air.

Lukas shrugged "I live a few streets away but it's not that far."

They spoke for a while more before Olivia failed to stifle a yawn. She covered her mouth before giving them a sheepish smile "I'm so sorry but it seems the bed is calling me."

Trevor gave her a sweet smile "why don't you head on up honey, I'll join you soon"

She nodded "sounds like a plan to me. Goodnight all, I'm sorry but I can't stay up any longer."

Bethany shrugged "it's no problem, we have to leave anyway. I still have to open up my store, and Alicia has a dance class to teach later. As for Lukas, he's got freedom until next week."

Trevor furrowed an eyebrow "Lukas what do you do for a living?"

"I'm an artist. Now when I say artist I mean paintings, not music or anything like that, I can't sing a note."

Olivia said her greetings before making her way up the stairs and entering the main bedroom, she collapsed onto the bed dramatically and did a massive stretch before falling asleep almost instantly.

Trevor saw their guests out and locked up behind them before heading upstairs and going to check in on Olivia. He chuckled softly when he saw that she hadn't even removed her shoes. He walked over to the bed and removed her shoes before covering her with the blankets.

He straightened up after covering her and shook his head "sleep well _Juls_."


	5. Chapter 5

**Evacuate.**

Olivia stirred slowly when she felt a hand nudging her shoulder, she let out a soft groan, her eyes still squeezed shut "go away" she muttered softly, still half asleep.

Trevor let out a soft chuckle at her response before gently nudging her shoulder again "Wake up your highness, we have guests and they need to speak to both of us urgently."

She rubbed her eyes before sitting up slowly and running her hand through her hair "what the hell do they want now? Didn't Bethany and Alicia get enough of trying to dig into our 'marriage' last night.

He furrowed his eyebrows at her words "It's not Bethany and Alicia, it's Price and Burns. Who knows they might be here to take us home."

The thought of that brought an instant smile to her face "I'll be down in a minute, just let me freshen up a bit."

He nodded "no problem" he stopped at her bedroom door "when you get time will you explain to me what you meant when you said they were digging into our marriage."

"sure" she shrugged.

...

She came downstairs, fresh out of the shower and neatly dressed with her hair tied back. She smiled at the casually dressed Marshals and thanked Trevor as he handed her a cup of coffee "Price, Burns it's good to see you two again."

Price nodded "likewise Olivia, I see you two got settled in pretty well. How have you both been holding up?"

Trevor sat down beside Olivia and shrugged "it's been okay, we may have made a few friends, and been around the city shopping malls a bit."

Burns sighed "when's the last you've been in the city?"

"yesterday, why?" Olivia asked cautiously, hoping that they weren't here to give them bad news.

"We've got some news, and it's pretty important so I need you two to listen up" Burns said before nudging Price to show them the photographs.

Olivia and Trevor looked down at the photographs and both gasped softly when they realised it was pictures of their _funerals_. Olivia placed the picture down and looked up at them "what's going on guys?"

"It was Trevor's funeral two days ago, family and friends showed up, even your younger brother. Everything ran smoothly, the NYPD was there, Olivia's squad was there to pay their respects and Burns and I watched everything from a distance." Price started.

Burns pointed to a picture of a guy dressed in casual clothes while speaking on his cellphone "This guy is Rob Dampey, he's the informative of the guys that are after you two. A friend of ours overheard him speaking on his cellphone at Trevor's funeral. He mentioned something about the everything looking legit and commented on how nothing seemed off."

"We thought it was good that they were off your trail but everything changed yesterday at Olivia's funeral. Your brothers in blue went all out for your funeral and everything was going smoothly, until your partner started going off and demanding that the casket be opened. He refused to accept the fact that you're dead and went about shouting about how the Olivia he knows wouldn't let something like a single gunshot knock her down." Price said before showing them a picture of a different guy.

Olivia sighed "who's that? And what does he have to do with everything?"

"This is the other informative, a few of our colleagues caught him, that's where we got Rob's name from. He was monitoring your funeral and got suspicious when they refused to open the casket for your partner, unfortunately he managed to inform the rest of the guys about it and they are now out searching for you two. They showed up at your old apartment and wrecked the place, they left us a little message but that doesn't really concern you two."

Trevor noticed Olivia getting a bit worked up and gently placed his hand on her back "what was the message and what does this mean?"

Burns rolled his eyes at Price, who refused to tell them what had happened "the girl that moved into your apartment was attacked, they went to search for clues on your whereabouts and got pissed when they found nothing. Unfortunately twenty year old Jennifer came home and caught them searching through her apartment. They raped her and carved the words 'you can run but you can't hide, Olivia' onto her abdomen. The informative we caught told us that they've been watching you both for the past three years and they're going to keep searching for you."

Olivia let out a shaky breath "so what are we gonna do?"

"that's why we're here, you two will have to start packing your things. You're moving, we need you to be further away from New York, don't leave the house for the rest of the day and make sure you're ready to leave when we return later..." Price said, watching as Olivia's eyes filled with tears.

She stood to her feet and rushed out of the livingroom, going into the kitchen "excuse me"

Trevor watched as she stormed off, he sighed and stood up "when do we leave and where are we going?"

"We'll pick you guys up around 3 in the morning, also pack in the pictures of you two. Leave no trace behind." Price said as they stood to their feet.

"we'll see you both later, be sure to get the Mrs on board." Burns said as they walked out of the house.

Trevor watched them drive off before going to check on Olivia, she stood in the kitchen, staring absent mindedly out the window while sipping on her water.

He walked over to her and gave her a small smile "what's wrong Olivia?"

She turned her back on him and sighed as she felt her tears drop from her eyes "I'm just a bit disappointed I guess. I was looking forward to going back home and now they're shipping us even further from home, I-I feel guilty. This is all because of me, if I hadn't been so persistent on solving the Elma case we wouldn't be in this situation."

Trevor heard her voice crack as she spoke, he so much wanted to comfort her and assure her that this would all be over eventually but he knew his place. They were nothing to each other, they just happened to be stuck in this mess together.

She let out a breath "Elliot is such a fucking idiot, if he just accepted it and moved on we could have been home by now."

"If you were in his shoes wouldn't you have done the same?" he asked gently.

She thought about it for a moment, before nodding and turning to face him. She allowed her tears to fall freely as she walked up to him and wrapped her arms around his waist, something she had become so accustomed to doing over this past two weeks.

He was slightly shocked by her allowing herself to be this open with him but he knew she was hurting really bad. He wrapped his arms around her and gently rubbed her back "it's going to be okay Liv, we're going to get through this and we'll be back home before you know it."

She looked up at him and sniffled softly "I know, it's just a bit overwhelming. I just really miss them."

He smiled down at her "believe me when I say that I know how you feel, I miss my family and friends too, but when I think about the fact that I can go back someday and see them again it cheers me up a bit. If I went back today, I would be killed and then I'd be without them forever, this way I atleast have a bit of hope."

She nodded "you're right, I'm sorry for overreacting and for crying all over your sweater."

He smirked "it's no problem, you are my wife after all."

She chuckled lightly "you know, you're not the guy I thought you were."

"what kind of guy am I then?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

"The type of guy that is going to tell Bethany and Alicia that I'm sick and can't go to lunch with them" she asked, giving him puppy dog eyes and a pout.

He smiled at how adorable she looked, but he knew better than to say it out loud, she'd kick his ass if he called her that. They may have been getting used to being around each other but they weren't close enough to start dishing out compliments.

"if I didn't know any better, I'd say you are using me to get rid of the women who irritate the crap out of you." he said with a chuckle.

Her face lit up "so you'll do it?"

He shrugged "I didn't say yes"

"you didn't say no either. I'll start packing up the photos in the rooms and a few of my things, and then we can gather the things downstairs a bit later." she said before walking out of the kitchen.

He watched her walk out and shook his head "oh the things you make me do Olivia." he whispered to himself.

...

Trevor walked into the main bedroom and smirked as he watched Olivia finish packing up the last of her things, she took hold of the photo album and sat down on the edge of the bed "are you just going to stand there and watch me or is there something you needed?" she asked, still not looking up from the album of photo shopped pictures.

Trevor let out a soft chuckle before going to sit down beside her "I just came to tell you that the ladies believed my sob story about you being sick and you now have the rest of the afternoon. I also came up to check if you're okay."

"thank you for covering for me, and why wouldn't I be okay Mr Connor?" she asked looking up from the pictures.

"you opened up in the kitchen and then closed down a few seconds later. I just came to make sure you weren't up here bawling your eyes out, because we may be moving further away from home."

"I guess I figured that it would be for the best. This can only go on for so long after all, they sound like they're unravelling the case so we should be home within a few months at least." she said with a smile.

He nodded "now that's the bad ass Benson that I know talking. All you have to do now is kick me out of here and we'd be back to normal."

She chuckled "get the hell out of my bedroom Langan." she said with a playful glare.

He chuckled before getting up and walking over to the door "your crap better be packed soon."

"Fuck off" she hollered with a smile on her face.

It was weird how she had gotten used to being around him, she knew the layers of hatred she held toward him was being broken down with each day they spent together. She fought against it though, she allowed herself to open up but not enough to get hurt.

...

Olivia sighed as she looked over at Trevor "so this is goodbye to another home"

He nodded "definitely, are we sure we packed everything?"

"Yeah I went into all the rooms and rechecked five times. Everything that is linked to us is in the bags." she said with a bitter sweet smile.

He took a slice of pizza out of the box and smirked "what are we going to do with ourselves while we wait?"

"I have no idea, but I'm already exhausted." she said, failing to stifle a yawn.

He checked the time and sighed "they should be here in the next ten minutes."

"are you nervous about all of this? I'm sure the fact that we just suddenly left in the middle of the night is going to raise a few questions."

"I'm nervous about where we might be going but not about leaving... This place never sat well with me either way" he said with a shrug.

"Really? I thought you found Alicia and Bethany quite interesting since you three were always texting or talking." she said with a scoff.

He chuckled "Are you jealous Mrs Connor?"

She rolled her eyes "don't flatter yourself Langan."

She knew he was right though, she was jealous, very jealous at that. She didn't like that he spoke openly to them yet he was guarded with his own wife. She shook her head at the thought.

_Pull it together Benson, you're not his actual wife and you have no right to be jealous_.

...

They sat and spoke for a while before Price and Burns came, they helped the Marshals carry their belongings to the black van parked outside. They checked that nobody was watching and quickly got into the van and drove slowly down the street.

Trevor and Olivia handed their keys over to the Marshals and sighed as they watched their most recent home disappear from their sights.

Olivia sat back and frowned "so where are we going?"

"Newburg" Price whispered.

Trevor's eyes widdened "as in Newburg, Oregon?"

Burns nodded "yes, Oregon. Are you two ready for this drive?"

Olivia let out a groan before turning to Trevor "am I allowed to kill them?"

He chuckled "you can do it, but they are our only hope at the moment. So I think it's best to keep them alive."

"You two are really cute together" Price pipped up, watching as they both scowled.

"How's your bullet wounds?" Burns asked.

"mine hurts like a bitch every morning around 5 am." Olivia said with a frown.

"My shoulder is pretty much healed I just can't carry anything that's too heavy." he said with a shrug.

Price chuckled "you two are messed up."

"I'm going to sleep so please shut up" Olivia said before making herself comfortable in her seat.

"you can lay over the seat and put your head on my lap if you want" Trevor offered, instantly regretting his words.

_You crossed the line dumbass, she's not that comfortable around you. Not yet atleast._

Olivia thought about it for a minute before shrugging "atleast I'll be comfortable"

He sat back and allowed her to get comfortable before unintentionally running his fingers through her hair as he spoke to Price and Burns. Olivia closed her eyes and relished in the feeling of him playing with her hair gently, it was helping her relax, _he_ was helping her relax.


	6. Chapter 6

**Safety.**

They arrived at their new home after what felt like the longest drive of their lives, both of them exhausted and ready to get a proper night's sleep. Trevor stepped out of the van before helping Olivia out of the van "at least it's beautiful out here"

She nodded and looked around "it is quite scenic, we should go visit the parks sometime."

He chuckled "are you asking me out on a date honey?"

She rolled her eyes "don't flatter yourself"

"somebody is super grouchy today" he teased

"How are you even this happy and energised after a 34 hour drive?"

"I don't allow things that are out of my control to disturb my peace." he said with a shrug.

She let out a breath "you should teach me how to do that."

They followed the Marshals into their new home and checked the place out. It was a lot bigger than the last one, and had four bedrooms this time. Olivia shook her head "why do we have so many bedrooms?"

"I was about to ask the same thing" Trevor added.

Burns shrugged "this was the only place available on short notice. Your cars will arrive later today or tomorrow, so you have all the time to unpack and get settled."

"Leave the sex for another time" Price teased.

Olivia rolled her eyes "yeah because we were really looking forward to being in a compromising position after that long ass drive."

Trevor smirked at the thought "we could make that happen honey"

She slapped him upside his head "don't get any ideas, I need sleep before I start playing your wife again."

He threw his arm around her shoulder "well it's a good thing you're not ugly, or else I'd have to call Bethany or Alicia to fill your place."

She scowled up at him and shrugged him off "that's not funny you asshole."

He let out a soft laugh "calm down, I'd go crazy if I was stuck with those two, just the thought of their squeaky voices."

Olivia smirked "well they would love the thought of staying with you."

Price nudged Burns gently "these two actually sound like a real couple"

Trevor looked down at Olivia and chuckled "well then we should apply for some acting jobs."

Olivia tried and failed to stifle a yawn "I have to get to bed or I'm going to pass out right here."

Price chuckled "its okay, you can go and get some rest. We have to leave either way, New York awaits."

Olivia said her greetings before going into one of the bedrooms and cuddling into the blankets, she was relieved that she could finally sleep comfortably.

Trevor locked up after Burns and Price left and made his way into the bedroom beside Olivia's, he too was exhausted and in need of some proper sleep.

...

**_One Month Later:_**

Trevor leaned against the trunk of his car and sighed "Julia, Eva is waiting for you." he hollered.

She grabbed her jacket before stepping out of their home and locking the door "just give me a minute, these locks are a real pain in the ass."

He walked up to her and took the keys out of her hand "remind me to fix these when we get back, also mind your language."

She rolled her eyes "yeah dad"

Eva laughed at the couple "you two are the cutest couple I've ever seen."

Olivia smiled over at their neighbour who had become her close friend over the past month "thanks Eva"

Trevor smirked before throwing his arm over Olivia's shoulder "even though everybody knows that I'm the cute part of this couple."

Eva chuckled before slipping into the backseat of Trevor's car, Olivia slid into the passenger seat after he opened the door for her and smiled "thank you darling."

"you are very welcome..." he winked over at her before looking at Eva who was smirking in the backseat "so where exactly are we going?"

"We're going to a little restaurant for lunch with my friend Aiden, he uhm, he owns a club in town and I'm certain you two would enjoy it. Although steer clear of Sandy she's a bit of a loose cannon and she's got a thing for married men." Eva explained while gesturing wildly with her arms.

Olivia looked back at her friend and smiled, she was happy for the first time in what felt like forever. Eva had popped in two days after they moved in and she's been with them ever since. She was a lovely woman, full of jokes and life, and she made Olivia realise that she wasn't ever truly living.

Trevor followed the directions of the charismatic blonde haired woman and listened as she told them stories of the best sites in Oregon. He raised an eyebrow at her "is there any secluded parks you know of, with awesome scenery?"

She nodded "yes there's about five great secluded parks to visit that I know about, one of them have a gorgeous little lake with water that you can actually swim in and it has a gorgeous picnic spot where if you're out late enough you could just relax and see the stars. It's absolutely gorgeous... Why do you ask though?"

He shrugged "Just wondering." he glanced over at Olivia "our anniversary is coming up."

Olivia turned to face him with a frown "honey our anniversary isn't anytime soon"

"you know I love planning ahead of time" he said with a smirk, he knew she would be pissed that he was making everything seem so real.

Olivia let out a breath, she was getting tired of all this acting, all she wanted was to either enjoy her time here or just go back home. She hated that people were constantly complementing her on a marriage that didn't exist, it was getting quite irritating and she was certain that her squad were busy moving on with their lives already.

She willed her tears not to fall at the thought of the people she considered family living on without her, Cragen was probably heartbroken, he was like a father to her, he was the only father figure she had. Fin and Munch were like her older brothers, she loved both of them dearly and missed hearing their corny jokes, hell she even missed Munch's conspiracy theories.

_Elliot, I miss him, he was like a..._

She shook her head gently, dismissing her thoughts immediately. She let out a sigh before subtly wiping the few tears that escaped her eyes.

Trevor noticed the distant look on her face and also her silent tears but he knew better than to question her infront of Eva, that would be something he'd do when they were alone. He offered her a smile when she looked over at him, silently assuring her that all would be okay.

They pulled up at the restaurant and followed Eva to a little table for four outside on the balcony, it was a beautiful sight. Olivia sat down beside Trevor and shook her head at Eva who was eyeing up a guy at a nearby table.

"Why don't you go over there and ask his number" she joked.

Eva let out an exasperated sigh "oh darling, if I didn't have the hots for Aiden I would have done it, but I can't take the risk of ruining my chances. Also Sandy won't be joining us today, she sent me a text, she has plans."

"How long do you and Aiden know each other?" Trevor asked.

She shrugged, picking at her freshly polished nails "a little over two years now."

"well then what are you waiting for, make your move" Olivia said with a shrug.

Eva rolled her eyes "did you just make a move out of the blue, or did you ease into a relationship?"

She smirked "eased into it, why?"

"Just wanted to point out why I haven't made a move, I'm trying to ease my way into his bedroom." she bit her lip "I'd let him bend me all the way over and-"

"Eva! Please spare us the details of your naughty thoughts" Olivia said with a soft giggle.

Trevor shook his head at Eva and nudged Olivia "I'm glad I didn't end up with this one" he joked.

"you're acting as if you two don't get down and dirty. I'm sure your sex life is amazing, your both hot and I can easily tell that you're both passionate." she said before taking a sip of the wine they ordered.

Olivia shifted nervously in her seat and forced a smile while her cheeks turned a deep shade of red "we erm..."

"we have our fun" Trevor finished, giving her a small smile "and that is all you need to know about our sex life."

Olivia turned to him and subtly mouthed a thank you. He nodded before looking back up Eva "so how long have you had feelings for Aiden?"

"two years, I've been in love with him since I laid eyes on him" she said with a dreamy look on her face.

Olivia laughed and shook her head "you really are something else Eva..."

"Good afternoon" said a handsome looking man as he sat down beside Eva, he offered her a smile before taking her hand and kissing the back of it "it's good to see you again Eva"

She smiled up at him "it's good to see you too Aiden, these are my friends I was telling you about. This is Julia and Michael Connor, guys this is Aiden."

Olivia extended her hand to him and gave him a warm smile "it's good to finally meet you Aiden."

He looked over at her, gently taking hold of her, he leaned down and placed a gentle kiss to her hand as well, smirking when he saw Trevor's eyes narrowing "it's lovely to meet someone as beautiful as you."

Trevor shook his hand and forced a smile "hey"

Aiden nodded at him with a smirk on his face "Michael, it's good to meet you. You're a very lucky man"

He furrowed his eyebrows "how so?"

"You're lucky to have a woman as beautiful as Julia" he said with a smile before taking a sip of the wine Eva poured him.

Trevor looked over at Olivia and gave her a warm smile "I definitely am a lucky man, she's so much more than I could ever ask for in a wife."

She felt her cheeks flush at his comment and smiled back at him "thank you darling, I'm lucky too, to have somebody as amazing as you by my side."

Eva let out a breath "you two are what I aspire to have."

Olivia chuckled "you'll get yours eventually, it takes time."

"sure does" Trevor said before taking a drink of his wine, he forced another smile, fighting the thoughts that plagued his mind.

Olivia noticed the look on his face and gently placed her hand ontop of his, giving it a comforting squeeze under the table. She wondered what was going on inside that head of his sometimes, but she knew better than to question him.

Aiden watched them like a hawk throughout their lunch, his green eyes focusing on the body language of the couple seated opposite him. Olivia noticed his stare on them and knew they'd have to up their game if they wanted to sell the fact that they're married. She was slightly disturbed everytime she saw his eyes trailing down her body but decided to just ignore his stare.

Trevor felt himself getting more pissed off with each passing second, watching Aiden eye Olivia like a piece of meat was irritating him. He didn't like that this man was so openly eye-fucking his wife.

_She's not your wife._

He let out a sigh, his thoughts reminding him that she was nothing to him, or atleast she was supposed to be nothing to him. Yet even though he knew they were on opposite sides of the spectrum he still couldn't help but think about how beautiful she looked. She wore a dress, something she had been doing a lot lately, and a pair of black strappy heels, accentuating her already gorgeous legs.

He could see her cleavage popping out of the top of her dress from where he sat, and willed his eyes not to linger on it, although it was an amazing sight. He knew she would kick his ass if she caught him staring at her boobs so instead he focused his eyes on her gorgeous face. He watched her nose crinkle and her eyes close as she threw her head back and let out a heartfelt laugh, it was the most beautiful sight he had ever seen.

She looked happy, she sounded happy, and he wanted her to stay that way. He closed his eyes for a minute to gather his thoughts, he couldn't believe what he was thinking at the moment, what he was feeling.

He wanted to make her happy, he wanted to be a part of her happiness, to see her breathtaking smile everyday, to hear her laugh. He just wanted her to finally let go of all the bad things he knew she was still holding onto, to overcome the pain she tried to hide everyday.

He shook his head gently, he could believe it, he didn't want it to be true but it was, and he couldn't deny it even if he tried.

_You're in love with Olivia Benson._

The thought made him cringe slightly, he knew it was true, but she clearly didn't feel the same. She hated him, because he defended the guys she tried to put away. He let horrible men back onto the streets and he was certain she believed that he had no heart, if only she knew how wrong she was.

...

The group of four spent the rest of the afternoon together, going to a nearby park and just relaxing in the hot weather. Olivia sat beside Trevor, his arm resting on the back of the bench as she sat a few inches away from him. The space between them wasn't noticable but it was there nevertheless, both of them refusing to sit against the other.

Aiden did a once over of Olivia's body, now that his view wasn't blocked by the table and licked his lips "so Julia, how long have you been married?"

"six years" she said with a forced smile, she felt uncomfortable under his stare and just wanted to leave already.

Trevor looked up at Aiden and smirked "it's not six years yet honey."

She rolled her eyes before looking up at him "Well it's as good as six years, just a few more months and then it's our anniversary."

He looked down at her, noticing the close promixity of their faces. He wanted to lean in but he valued his life, she'd probably kill him if he kissed her "you're absolutely right"

Aiden rolled his eyes and cleared his throat, gaining the attention of the couple once again "so what are your anniversary plans?"

Olivia shrugged "I don't know yet"

"it's a surprise that you won't be getting out of me anytime soon" Trevor added.

She looked back at him "what kind of surprise?"

He chuckled down at her curious face "that would be telling, and I ain't telling you a thing"

She pouted "but I'm your wife..."

He laughed at her childlike behavior, he found it awfully cute "nice try darling, but my lips are sealed."

"fine, I'll get it out of you eventually" she mumbled with a groan.

He shook his head "you won't, but you can try."

Eva shook her head and chuckled at her friends "what's the secret to being this happy even after six years of marriage?"

Olivia looked up at Trevor and smirked "marry your best friend."

He nodded "definitely, and always support your spouse."

Aiden let out a soft chuckle "what about sex, I think one of the secrets should be having sex everyday."

Olivia rolled her eyes "that too"

Trevor scowled at Aiden, who shot him a smirk in return "are you in a relationship Aiden?"

He scoffed "why do ask? You want to take me out on a date?"

Trevor smirked "why would I want to take you out when I get to take my wife out whenever I want. It was just a question."

Olivia noticed the way he accentuated the words _'my wife'_ and knew that was his way of telling Aiden to back off. She gave him a grateful smile "yeah Aiden, you've been asking us a ton of questions, so it's only fair that you answer one of ours."

He smiled over at her "well since you're asking, no I'm not in a relationship, I haven't really found anybody I liked, and I stopped looking after a while but I might have to start searching again."

Eva let out a sigh, she wasn't dumb, she saw the way Aiden had been eyeing Olivia and knew that she didn't stand a chance to be with him, not when his eyes were set on a woman who was clearly happily married. She forced a smile "so what inspired you to start searching again?"

He shrugged "Julia and Mike inspired me" he said with a mischievous smirk, his eyes trained on Olivia "they made me realise that maybe marriage and love isn't all that pointless. Maybe finding someone will be a challenge that I'll enjoy, and I definitely don't mind a challenge."

Olivia knew he was referring to her, she moved slightly closer to Trevor, he noticed her movement and gave her a reassuring smile. He looked up at Aiden and scowled again "well we better get back home, we both have to sort out our lesson plans and as much as we want to avoid it, we have to do it eventually."

Olivia's face lit up at the thought of leaving "you're absolutely right, although you might have to force me to do the lesson plan."

He chuckled "that's nothing new now is it?"

"nope" she said with a smile, popping the 'p' before winking up at him.

Eva looked up at Aiden and took a deep breath "do you wanna hang out for a bit longer?"

He sighed "sure, I'll drop you at home later."

Trevor nodded before standing to his feet and extending his hand down to Olivia, she took his hand and allowed him to help her up. She leaned down to hug Eva and smirked "I'll see you tomorrow, don't have too much fun."

Eva chuckled "I would never" she winked.

Trevor shook his head at Eva "behave yourself"

"I always behave, it's Julia that you have to tell that to." Eva teased.

He threw his arm over her shoulders "the issue is I like it when she doesn't behave, I tend to benefit from it."

Olivia's jaw dropped when she realised what he was referring to, she noticed the scowl on Aiden's face and smirked before playfully hitting Trevor's chest "leave it to you to think with what's in your pants."

He let out a loud laugh "don't act like you don't like it woman."

She smirked, she knew he was trying to make Aiden jealous, she didn't understand why but she decided to play along. She pulled him closer and leaned closer to his ear, watching Aiden's reaction out of the corner of her eyes "of course I like it darling" she whispered.

Trevor closed his eyes briefly, fighting his sudden urge to take her right there, she was so sexy, her voice, the way she played along. He smirked down at her, feeling his arousal growing "you're a bad woman Julia"

She smirked "and you love it Mike"

Aiden cleared his throat "it was good meeting you two, I hope to see you again sometime."

Olivia turned back to him and smirked when she felt Trevor wrap his arm around her waist. They said their greetings before walking back to their car, hand in hand.

She let go of his hand and slid into the passenger seat after he opened the door for her, she secured her seat belt before smirking over at him.

"thank you for that" she whispered.

"for what?" he asked as he began driving.

She closed her eyes as she rested back against her seat "for getting us out of there, Aiden was creeping me out."

"no need to thank me, I saw the way he was staring you up and I could tell you were uncomfortable, so I figured it would be best if we left before I beat that smirk off his face." he said through gritted teeth.

She looked over at him and chuckled "look at you, being my hero..." she bit her lip "I'm glad you were with me though, today, I'm glad you agreed to join Eva and I."

"why?" he asked.

She bit her lip, willing herself to shut up, but she knew she could trust him enough to open up, even if it was just a little bit of a confession "because for the first time in years, I felt safe... Without my gun on my hip, I didn't mind that he was staring because I knew... You wouldn't let him lay a finger on me or even get too close, I knew you'd stay by my side." she let out a breath "don't take this the wrong way, but you... You make me feel safe."

He smiled over at her "I understand, and I want to assure you that I won't allow Aiden or any guy to hurt you in anyway. We're in this together so we have to look out for each other." he took her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze "you are my wife after all."


	7. Chapter 7

**Dessert For Two.**

Olivia walked up to the door and checked the peep hole, sighing when she saw Aiden standing there.

She opened the door and forced a smile "hi"

He smiled warmly at her "hi Julia, I know you're probably wondering what I'm doing here, but I uhm... I wanted to ask if you were doing anything today, maybe you and I could hang out for a bit. You seem like a great person and I'd like to get to know you a bit better."

She couldn't believe the nerve he had, she was married for goodness sake, or atleast she was supposed to be married, she forced a smile. There was no way she wanted to be anywhere alone with him, not after how he stared her down yesterday, he made her uncomfortable "that sounds lovely, but Mike and I have plans for the day."

He sighed "maybe another time?"

She shrugged "I'll let you know."

He smirked "so can I atleast have your number? That way I'll be able to confirm when you're free."

She let out a breath before taking his phone and typing her number into it, she gave him a tight lipped smile "there you go"

He nodded "thanks again Julia, I'll see you around."

"you're welcome and yeah I'll see you around... Have a good day" she said before watching him walk to his car.

She walked back into her home and sat down beside Trevor "you won't believe who was at the door"

Her raised an eyebrow at her "who?"

"Aiden, he came to ask me on a date" she rolled her eyes.

He chuckled "and how did you get yourself out of that situation?"

"I just said that I have a date with my husband" she smirked.

"So I'll have to take you out then" he said with a smirk.

"You don't have to, it was just a cover up."

"and what happens if we stay here and Eva shows up. She doesn't do well with secrets or not speaking so he'll definitely find out you lied and then he'll be even more persistent."

She pursed her lips "fine but we don't have to go anywhere fancy, I'm not in the mood for dressing up."

"Eva told me about this café in the town that is really secluded and good place to hang out if you want your privacy. Sounds like the perfect place if you ask me" he said with a shrug.

"I'm up for it, as long you don't mind watching me stuff my face in some chocolate cake" she said with a smile.

He laughed softly "please we've been living together for almost two months, I've been watching you stuff your face this whole time."

She rolled her eyes "whatever, I'll just go put on some fresh clothes."

He nodded "no problem, I'll be waiting out here."

...

She came back into the living room a few minutes later dressed in a white shirt, a pair of fitted jeans and white sneakers. He looked up at her and couldn't help but take in her appearance, she looked amazing, she always looked amazing.

He stood up and grabbed his car keys "you look... Nice..."

She felt her cheeks flush, she didn't expect him to compliment her when she felt so plain and dull, she tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear "thanks... So do you"

"you do realise I'm still wearing the same clothes right" he said with a grin, pointing down at his plain sweater and jeans.

She looked over his outfits, her eyes stopping at his torso for a minute or two, she could see his muscles right through his sweater "yeah... Uhm... I just... Yeah" she mumbled.

_Great job, he thinks you're a complete dumbass now._

She rolled her eyes as her own thoughts were irritating her, she watched him grab a hoodie "are you feeling cold?"

He shook his head "no I just like having a hoodie with me, incase the weather changes."

She laughed "that's a New York mindset."

He shrugged "hey if there's one thing the city taught me, it was to be prepared for any kind of weather."

She shook her head "well you can fry in your hoodie, I'll stick to my sweater."

"fine but don't complain if it gets cold" he teased.

She rolled her eyes "you ready to go?"

"Yeah" he followed her out of their home, locking it up behind them before leading her to the car.

She reached for the handle but he gently took her hand and turned her around so that she was facing him "It's my job to open the door for you"

She felt her cheeks heat up due to his kindness and his close proximity to her "I know how to open a door."

"I like doing these little things for you, makes me feel like a good husband" he said with a wink.

She chuckled "okay then I'll accept, your good husband like behavior."

...

Olivia walked up to the most secluded table and chuckled as Trevor pulled her seat out for her "you're serious about this gentleman business aren't you?"

He nodded "I was taught to respect a woman and treat her well at all times"

She smiled "well then I'll have to go and personally thank your mother when we get back to New York"

"so you wanna meet my mom then?" he joked.

She suddenly realised that she may have crossed a line and shifted nervously "no I was just kidding, I uhm... I didn't-"

"Relax" he cut her off, giving her a warm smile "I'm joking Olivia. I'm sure my mom would love you if she ever met you"

She blushed "how long do you think this case will take?"

"I don't know, but I won't be heading back until I get word from the Marshals. I can handle the fact that mom will see me again someday, but going back now is a risk I'm not willing to take." he said with a frown.

She placed his hand over his "I totally get it"

"can I ask you something?" he asked cautiously after the young waitress left their table.

"sure..." she said nervously, not sure what to expect.

"tell me about your family, what were they like? Did you have siblings? What was life like for young Olivia?" he asked with a smile, thanking the waitress as she brought their cake and coffee.

Olivia let out a shaky breath "there's not much to tell... I was an only child, with a single mother" she bit her lip, looking down at her hands "I never met my dad, and my mom wasn't exactly the best person to be around... She uhm..."

He took her hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze "hey you don't have to do this if you don't want to. It was just a question"

She gave him a grateful smile "I'll explain it all when we're alone."

He shook his head "you don't have to, I und-"

"I want to" she cut him off, giving him a soft smile "I trust you. Plus you opened up to me... I just don't want to speak about it while we're in public."

He took a piece of his cake and moaned softly at the taste, Olivia shook her head "it can't possibly be that good."

He raised an eyebrow at her before taking a piece on his fork and extending it to her "try it for yourself."

She pursed her lips for a few minutes before opening her mouth and allowing him to feed her the forkful of cake. She savoured the sweet taste, letting out a soft moan at the delicious taste "that's the best mousse cake I've ever had in my life."

He smirked "well we could always share it"

She shook her head "it's okay, you enjoy your cake. I'm a traditional chocolate cake type of girl." she said before taking a piece of her cake.

Trevor watched as the colour drained from Olivia's face, she took a napkin and held it to her mouth. She wiped her mouth before pushing the plate away from her and taking a massive gulp of her coffee.

"You okay?" he asked.

She nodded "yeah... It's just, this cake tastes like shit, and that's putting it gently."

"my offer still stands, we could share"

"no it's okay, you enjoy yourself. I'm good with my coffee" she said, shooting him a wink.

"If I wanted to eat alone, I wouldn't have brought you here." he raised the fork to her lips "just eat it"

"fine" she scowled before allowing him to feed her the forkful of cake.

"was that so difficult?" he teased

"extremely" she shot back.

He looked at her and shook his head, he couldn't believe how beautiful she was, she was perfect. His smile softened as he watched her cheeks turn a shade of red when she noticed him staring at her.

She bit her lip, his gaze was fixed on her and she noticed the look of pure adoration on his face "what are you looking at?" she joked, trying to break the silence.

He shrugged "I just realised... Nevermind"

She took a sip of her coffee again "so on a brighter note, are you ready to start working soon?"

He was grateful that she changed the subject, even after he almost blurted everything he was thinking out to her "not really but it's exciting, and I get to work in the same school as you"

"I feel like you'll be a distraction to me" she chuckled "you'll probably pop in and gain the attention of half of the girls in the class and then I'll have to fight to get their attention back when you leave the room."

He laughed "why are we working at a high school again?"

"because it's easier to get a job there, and it'll be a fun challenge"

He thought about it for a few minutes before winking at her "you make a good argument, why aren't you a lawyer?"

She let out a heart laugh "because my arguments are either very blunt or very... Sexual and last time I checked, seduction has only ever worked in sitcoms."

He laughed "you're full of it Olivia Benson"

"Yeah and you have to get used to it because you're going to be stuck with me for god alone knows how long." she said with a chuckle.

"well I look forward to getting to know you better, now that you're not as gaurded"

She gave him a confused stare "I've never been gaurded"

He scoffed playfully "the first week in North Carolina you said like two sentences to me and avoided me the rest of the time."

"okay maybe I was a little guarded, but can you blame me, we were on different sides all our lives and now suddenly we have to live together and be a happy couple. It's a difficult transition."

"And yet here we are, making it work" he said with a smile.

She shrugged "only because we don't have a choice. If things were different you wouldn't be sitting in a café with me right now, we wouldn't even be talking."

He nodded "that is true, but not for the reasons you think. I wouldn't be sitting in a café with you because I wouldn't have worked up the nerve to ask you, we wouldn't be talking because I wouldn't want to be turned down by you. Abstaining was always better than rejection Olivia, that's why I didn't speak to you much in New York."

"You're telling me that you wanted to speak to me and get to know me in New York?"

"yes I did. I still want to get to know you better and I'm glad to have this opportunity." he said with such conviction that she had a hard time not believing him.

She pursed her lips "I would've appreciated your company in New York, I want to get to know you better too"

"You serious?" he asked cautiously, hoping she wasn't joking.

She nodded "yes I am"

...

They sat in the café for about three more hours and spoke about so many things before finally paying their tab and getting up to leave. Olivia gasped when she looked out of the little café and saw that it was raining.

Trevor looked down at her expression and chuckled, he removed his hoodie and handed it to her "that'll help."

She looked up at him and shook her head "no it's okay, you need it too"

"take it, I'll be fine"

"I can't let you get all soaked just because I didn't bring a hoodie. I'll be okay" she tried again.

He shook his head "no can do, I want you to wear it... Look we'll be standing here all day until you realise that I'm not letting you leave without this hoodie on."

She couldn't fight the smile that tugged at her lips as she took the hoodie "fine I'll take it, but only because I can see that you really want to see me in your clothes."

He let out a laugh "if that's what it takes then yes, I want to see you in my clothes."

_And in my bed. _

He shook his head, feeling his face flush due to his intrusive thought.

Olivia put the hoodie on and chuckled as it was way too big for her, she looked up at him and shook her head, a playful smile on her lips "you happy now? I'm basically drowning."

"you look hilarious" he said with a laugh.

"I'm glad you find this so amusing, you asshole" she joked before letting out a laugh as well.

She stopped laughing after a minute and gave him a bright smile "thank you, your hoodie is super comfortable. I could live in this."

He opened the door and shook his head "you're welcome, and only you would say something like that."

She slipped into the car and smirked "that's cause I'm one of a kind"

"You sure are." he chuckled "now when we get home you can make us some one of a kind pasta."

"Didn't you just have cake?"

"firstly that was two hours ago, secondly you ate most of the cake, and thirdly I'm a big man, I need more than two slices of cake to fill me up." he said with a laugh as he watched her jaw drop.

"I did not eat most of it and you shouldn't be using your size to get your way" she shot back with a smirk.

_Although I'm sure you are a big man. _

She felt her cheeks heat up, her thoughts were driving her insane, but more so the man beside her was driving her insane.


	8. Chapter 8

**Open Up.**

Olivia stood in the kitchen, preparing the pasta dish as it was her turn to cook. She looked out of the kitchen window and saw that the rain had worsened, lightning was striking across the afternoon sky and the clouds were dark.

Trevor walked into the kitchen after changing into a sweatpants and a dry sweater, he walked over to the counter and poured each of them a glass of wine "here you go"

She smiled over at him "how did you know that I needed this right now?"

"I read your mind" he joked.

She shook her head "you are something else Trevor Langan..."

He could see something was bothering her but he wasn't sure whether to ask about it or not. He sighed "are you okay?"

She nodded, looking away from him and back to the food she was preparing "I'm fine."

He took a sip of his wine before reaching for the spoon she was using and took over "has anybody ever told you that you're a bad liar."

She shrugged "what's that supposed to mean?"

"I can see something is bothering you, and usually I wouldn't push you to speak but I feel that maybe you shouldn't bottle everything up all the time." he said with a kind smile.

She scoffed, internally building her defensive walls up again "I feel that maybe you should mind your business."

"I guess I deserved that" he said with a sigh "but I'm only trying to help."

She flinched slightly when the sound of thunder rumbled, Trevor noticed it and gave her a concerned look "look if you say you're fine then I'll drop it. I'm just looking out for you Olivia, and I know it may be hard to believe but it's true."

"the thunder just startled me a bit, but I'm totally fine." she said after taking another sip of her wine.

"okay then, I'm sorry for prying"

She let out a breath "no, I'm sorry. You were just trying to see if I was okay and I was a complete bitch. I'm sorry, I just... I struggle when it comes to... I just."

"You struggle when it comes to letting people in, it's no secret. I do it too, but I've come to learn that sometimes a little support from the right person can lighten the load." he added while plating their food.

He brought her plate over to her and sat down opposite her, after bringing the bottle of wine to the tiny kitchen table they sat at. He refilled both of their glasses "you know you can trust me right?"

"Trusting doesn't really come easy for me." she whispered "but I am trying, I swear I'm trying to open up and be less guarded and I do trust you, there's just a few things I need to deal with on my own I guess."

"you don't have to open up for everybody though, you gotta have your team, who you know will have your back no matter what."

She looked up at him "who's your team?"

"My mother... I just needed to sit down and speak to her after a long day and everything would instantly be okay again. That's why this is so difficult, leaving her on her own in New York, although I know that Thomas would have taken her in by now."

"You really love her, I can see it in your eyes. It's beautiful."

He gave her a tight lipped smile "I do love her... Tell me about your mother, what was she like?"

She felt her eyes well up at just the mention of her mother "there's not much to tell, she wasn't all that great... She uhm... She was always drunk, always bringing new guys into our home." she scoffed "not the best role model for a little girl, and I didn't understand it for a long time, I just figured she hated me"

She took a deep breath to steady her voice "I remember coming home from school one day and finding her passed out on the sofa. The entire place reaked of cheap beer and I had to clean it all up, because I knew if she woke up and saw the place like that she would beat the crap out of me even though it wasn't my fault."

"I thought she was a horrible human being and I didn't understand, until I heard her crying one night. I went to her room and stood against the door, listening in as she cried herself to sleep. A week later she brought a guy home and she even sobered up for him, but he was a creep... He was an abusive bastard, he beat her up and I tried to stop him, but I was only eight years old. He hit me with a broken bottle and I don't remember what happened after that."

Trevor moved over and sat down beside her, placing his hand on her back "please tell me he didn't..."

She shook her head "he didn't rape me, but he did rape my mother. She cried and fixed up my forehead before giving me a pep talk that consisted of her telling me to never trust a man. That's was when she told me about my dad..."

She wiped the tears that rolled down her cheeks "he was a rapist, my dad raped my mother... And I, I..."

She broke down into sobs, unable to complete her sentence. She didn't need to complete it, he knew what she was going to say, and suddenly it all made sense to him. Why she fought so fiercely for the victims, why she hated his job.

He pulled her into his arms and carried her to the living room as she broke down, she opened up after the first time in years and it still killed her to know that she was a product of the one thing she fought against everyday of her life. He sat down with her in his arms and held her, making sure she knew that he was here for her.

He felt her flinch in his arms when the thunder rumbled again, she tucked her face into the crease of his neck and held onto him. He ran his hand up and down her back in a comforting manner until her sobs turned into hiccups.

For an hour she just sat there, in his arms, neither of them said a word. He had been playing with her hair for a while now, noticing that it was calming her down. He looked down at her once her breathing had evened out "you okay?"

She sniffed and nodded gently "thank you"

"no, thank you... For opening up to me" he whispered.

She moved her head and looked up at him "I take it you figured the rest of the story out."

He nodded "sure did, and I think you're amazing-"

"what? But I-"

He placed his finger against her lips "you didn't let me finish. I think you are amazing for taking something so dark and using it to inspire you to help the females that went through the same hell your mom went through. It all makes sense now, why you hated my job so much, I let the monsters you tried put away walk right out again and I feel horrible for it. So I want to thank you, for being great at your job and for making New York a little safer each day."

She blinked back her tears, refusing to cry again. She gave him a sheepish smile "I love my job, I love helping the people who have the least help. Nobody understands the struggles a rape victim goes through and it's such a shame. Like nobody looks at a murder victim and asks 'why was she out that late? Why was she wearing a short dress?' no they accept the fact that a crime was committed, but with a rape victim. They blame the victims and that's the most sick thing, because nobody should ever be blamed for something someone else did to them."

He tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear "and you're still wondering why I think you are amazing, Olivia your passion for helping people is something so rare and so precious. Promise me you will never let this world take that from you, that fighting spirit, your heart for people." he said cupping her cheek, he dropped his hand when she nodded and wrapped it around her waist again.

They sat in silence for a few more minutes, Olivia was still straddling him, his arms was still around her waist. She couldn't fight how at home she felt in his arms, it felt so right, sitting in his embrace, having him hold her. It all felt right, perfect even.

A loud crackle of thunder pulled her out of her thoughts, her entire body jolting slightly.

He furrowed his eyebrows "are you afraid of thunder?"

She looked down at her hands that rested between them "yes I am, always have been. My mom died in a storm, she was drunk and she walked out of the apartment, the rain was heavy and she slipped and fell down the stairs at the doorway to leave the apartment building, she broke her neck, died immediately. I waited up for her all night, and hid under the table when the thunder sounded. The next morning my neighbour came and took me over to her place, that's when I found out my mother was dead."

He took his hand and gently lifted her face, his finger under her chin, just so that she could look into his eyes "how old were you?"

"I was fourteen" she sighed "the last words I said to my mother was that I wished she was dead, I told her I'd be better off without her in my life. Those words are something I will regret for the rest of my life."

"you were young Olivia, teenagers say harsh things they don't mean all the time, and if your mom had any sense she probably forgave you as she walked out, or in her last few minutes. You need to forgive yourself, you can't live with that burden, even though it's difficult to let guilt go."

She took his hand and sighed "you're a great man Trevor Langan, you are nothing like the man I thought you were. I'm so glad I got to see this caring side of you, the side you don't show in the courtroom."

He brought her hand up to his lips and kissed the back of it "I'm glad you opened up to me, you were brave enough to share a story I'm sure you haven't shared with many people. Also I want to thank you for being the reason that I will no longer be a defense lawyer, when we return to New York I'm going to speak to my business partner. I want to be on your side, not working against you, I want to help you put the bad guys away."

She allowed a massive smile to cover her face and she pulled him in for a massive hug "are you serious right now?"

"As serious as I'll ever be" he whispered.

She pulled away and shook her head "nobody has ever done anything that drastice for me, because of me."

He caressed her cheek gently "I would do this and so much more for you Olivia Benson"

She stared into his eyes for a few minutes, she was fascinated by how beautiful his eyes were. They were a deep shade of ocean blue, mixed with an array of greens, he had the most beautiful eyes she had ever seen. She moved her face closer to his slowly, stopping a few inches away from his lips.

Trevor watched as her eyes fluttered closed before he closed the space between them, their lips meeting in the most passionate kiss either of them had experienced.

Olivia felt what she could only describe as electricity shooting throughout her body and he cupped her cheek and kissed her with a passion that she had never been kissed with before. His tongue slipped between her lips, exploring her mouth as she did the same, both of them moaned into their intense kiss.

They broke apart when air was needed and Olivia rested her head against his, she could feel his arousal between her legs and suddenly all she could think about was dragging him to her bedroom. She closed her eyes, her entire body was burning and her panties were pretty useless at the moment.

His hands rested against her hips, not making a move even though he desperately wanted to, but he wouldn't do anything until she was ready. He knew she was vulnerable at that exact moment and knew that it couldn't go further, but he wouldn't decline a few more kisses.

She looked down at him after a few minutes and let out a breath "I want you."

He smirked "I want you too, but our first time is going to be different. You're vulnerable right now and I don't want you to wake up regretting it..."

Her cheeks flushed slightly "am I atleast allowed to kiss you?"

He pulled her in for another deep kiss, making sure she felt just how badly he wanted her. She moaned into his mouth, her hips slowly moving against his. He felt her moving and groaned, she was so sexy, she was making it difficult for him not to do anything.

His hand moved from her hip to her thigh, their mouths clashing together passionately. Olivia moaned into mouth again, feeling his hands moving toward her burning core.

She eased out of the kiss and shook her head gently "you are driving me insane"

"you can clearly feel that you're doing the same to me" he said, his eyes averting his boner which she was sitting against.

She let out a breath, looking down at the impressive size of his boner, even through his pants she could see that he would stretch her. She bit her lip at the thought, it had been too long since she felt the touch of a man on her body and she wanted him, she wanted him now.

He lifted her face once again "Olivia..." he warned gently.

She shook her head "I'm not vulnerable Trevor... I want you."

He noticed that her eyes had darkened with arousal "I don't want you to regret-"

She pressed her lips to his "do you want me? Do you really want me Trevor?"

He nodded "I really want you."

She smirked against his lips "then take me, now."


	9. Chapter 9

**A Friend Of A Friend.**

Olivia gasped as he picked her up and carried her to the main bedroom, her lips remained glued to his as they kissed. She couldn't believe this was actually happening but she wasn't going to protest either.

He gently laid her down on the bed and smiled down at her "are you sure about this Liv?"

She felt her cheeks flush under his intense stare "Come here" she motioned for him to lay down beside her, which he did "I wouldn't bring you in here if I wasn't sure."

He leaned in for another kiss, caressing her cheek as their lips fused together. He groaned into her mouth softly and allowed his hands to slowly make their way down her body.

She moaned softly into their kiss, her hand moving to the back of his neck and pulling him closer. She gently broke their kiss and smiled up at him "Trevor... Make love to me?"

He nodded "it'll be my pleasure"

He rolled her onto her back and quickly made work to get rid of her sweater, he pulled it over her head and took a deep breath when he saw her lace clad breast. She was the most beautiful woman he had ever laid eyes on, her body was perfect . He leaned down and pressed a kiss to her ample breast, a smile covered his lips when he heard the delicious moans that fell from her lips.

She sucked her bottom lip between her teeth, her chest raising and falling heavily, she was beyond aroused now and she had the wet panties to prove it. She felt him removed her bra and gasped when he took her nipple into his mouth, lapping around it with his tongue. Feeling him take his time like this was the best feeling in the world, she could feel that this was more than just a quick fuck to him, to her as well.

She groaned, her fingers tangled into his hair, she tugged at it "Trevor, please..."

He let her nipple go and smirked up at her flushed face, he kissed his way down her body, stopping to remove her pants, he eased it down her legs in the most gently way possible. Olivia sat up and looked at him with a twinkle in her eyes as she pulled his sweater over his head, her hands and explored his naked torso. She felt oddly comfortable being naked in his presence, both of them taking their time to get used to the others body.

She made work of his pants and within seconds they were both naked, their lips fused together in an earth shattering kiss. He hovered over her body, holding himself up on his elbows, a groan left his lips when he felt her leg hiking up his waist.

He took hold of her leg and gripped it gently before looking down into her sparkling brown eyes, he gave her a small smile "Are you ready?"

She nodded "yes" she whispered before pulling his face toward hers.

They gave each other deep open mouthed kisses, getting lost of the taste of each other, Trevor kissed her deeply before pushing the tip of his erection into her. He stilled for a few minutes, hearing her let out a pain filled grunt, he caressed her cheek "are you okay?"

She nodded, her eyes closed "yes I'm fine, it's just a tight fit"

He kissed her forehead "I'll go slow on you, okay?"

She nodded, feeling his hands gently rubbing her hip, his way of calming her down. She bit her lip "more" she whispered

He slowly pushed a few inches deeper into her, letting out a groan as he pushed through her tightened walls. She gripped his shoulder, letting out a soft pant, she was glad that he was going slow on her. It had been three years since she had sex and he was definitely doing his bit and stretching her to the fullest degree.

She groaned into his mouth when she felt him stretching her, as he pulled back before pushing in a bit more, and kept repeating that motion until he filled her to the hilt, even then it was still a tight fit. She had never felt a man fill her so completely, no man fit so perfectly, she let out a soft groan. He stilled for a few minutes, giving her time to adjust, once she was ready she wiggled her hips gently.

He started with slow and powerful thrusts, his lips attaching to the skin of her neck. Her back arched beneath him, giving him more access into her aroused body. Her moans only egged him on as he continued thrusting deep into her body, his lips still appreciating the taste of her silky skin.

Her nails dug into his back when he hit a particular spot inside of her, she let out a groan of pleasure as he gripped her hip, her other leg moving up his waist to join the other one. He pushed further into her body, his lips moved up from her neck and gave her a soul tingling kiss that left her breathless.

She knew that she was not going to last long at all, not when he felt so good inside of her, not when she saw stars and felt fireworks exploding inside of her with each thrust of their hips. He groaned into her mouth, he should have known she would be able to take him, she was Olivia Benson after all, she could handle anything. He pulled away from her lips and looked down at the pleasure stricken look on her face, he could stay like this forever, buried deep inside of her.

He groaned when he felt her teeth digging into the skin of his shoulder, her hips meeting his thrust for thrust, as little groans and pants of pleasure fell from her kiss bruised lips. A sheen of sweat covered both of their body's as the temperature raised in the room.

She gasped "Trevor I'm..."

He gave her a earth shattering kiss "let go, I'm right behind you."

She fisted up the blankets as their hips moved in rhythm, her back arching off the bed as she let out a loud scream as her orgasm hit with such force that she was left breathless. Trevor felt her walls holding him in a vice grip, and that did him in, he too let out a loud groan as he came inside of her. He pushed impossibly deeper into her pulsating lower body and groaned into her neck, feeling her legs shake around his body as her orgasm was prolonged.

They came long and hard, riding out their orgasms with moans of the others name, she couldn't believe how amazing it felt to be with him, and he couldn't believe how amazing it felt to be with her. They remained wrapped up in each others arms, relishing in the aftershocks of their love making.

He leaned down and pressed a gently kiss to her lips, a smile on his lips when looked down at her. The look of pure satisfaction on her face was enough to make him the happiest man on earth, he had a hard time believing that she actually opened up to him and allowed him to take her, she gave herself to him and he did the same.

Trevor took hold of her hand and held it against his chest, their faces were inches apart and their breathing was heavy. He gave her to most handsome smile she had ever seen and gently pecked her lips.

"That was the most amazing thing I have ever felt, but I want you to know..." he swallowed the lump in his throat "I want you to know that I absolutely adore you Olivia Benson. I don't want to hurt you but I want to know if this is really what you want. Do you really want to be with me, in an actual relationship... I don't want all of this passion to be here tonight and then you wake up hating me tomorrow morning."

She let out a shaky breath and cupped his cheek "I... I like you Trevor, and that's not something easy for me to say. I really do want this, just stay here with me, tonight."

"I just don't want us to rush into something and end up hurting each other. You've been hurt one too many times and I don't want to add to that, I never want to see your tears rolling because of me. Unless they're tears of joy." he whispered. "and I know it's stupid of me to speak about rushing when we've just had amazing sex... We kind of already crossed a line."

"When we first came here all I could think about was going back home, and even yesterday I wanted to go home because it was all too much for me... But what's here, now, is so real. Trevor I never opened up like this to anybody other than Elliot, although not the physical part, we've never had sex, I never allowed people to know the real me... Yet you've seen my scars, and you're still here. Everyday I wake up miserable and missing home, and then I walk into the kitchen and see your smile and all the thoughts of leaving this place goes away."

He tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear "I feel like this whole situation was a blessing and curse all rolled into one. When we get home we'll have to pick up the pieces and god alone knows how long that'll take us, and then there's the upside"

"which is?"

"being here with you, I feel like this is life's way of giving us both a much needed break." he kissed her forehead gently "and I wouldn't want to spend this time with anybody else"

"my sentiments exactly" She smiled before pulling him down and kissing him gently, she bit his lip before pulling away "we should probably get some sleep..."

He raised a brow at her "when you said that I should stay here with you what exactly did you mean?"

"I meant that you should stay here, in my room." she whispered almost nervously.

He nodded "I'd love to, although I'm not going to get dressed... Also can I hold you?"

She chuckled "I'd really like it if you held me. Oh and I'm not getting dressed either, I don't exactly like sleeping in clothes."

He pulled out of her gently and settled beside her, pulling her closer to him. Olivia cuddled up against him, laying her head on his chest. He let out a soft groan when he felt her breasts pressed against the skin of his chest, she wore nothing as well and it was driving him insane.

He wrapped his arms around her "so miss Benson how do you prefer sleeping?"

She smirked, running her finger down his chest gently "well I like feeling the sheets on my skin, and when I have company I like feeling skin on my skin."

He lifted her chin slightly "if you're trying to drive me crazy it's working."

"I would never do such a thing counselor." she said softly.

He laughed a bit "you really are a tease."

"Comes with the territory" she retorted.

They laid in silence for a few minutes, both of them trying to comprehend the situation they were in. Neither of them could believe what happened over the past two months, not only did they have to start a whole new life but they were also now starting a new relationship.

Olivia let out a contented sigh, she felt safe in his arms, just feeling his skin against hers felt so unbelievably right. The way he held her and kissed her was just so perfect, he made her realise that maybe she had been missing out on a few things in New York.

She had been so work orientated that she forgot to live her life, she didn't have any friends out of the precinct or any family. She was alone, everyday, and the few relationships she had always ended with her heart breaking.

Her mind raced back to the last relationship she was in, it was with David Haden. He had made her so happy, both in and out of the bedroom, he made her realise that life had a lot to offer. Then he chose the job over her, they ended things on good terms but her heart still hurt. She cried herself to sleep for three whole weeks after they split up, and never allowed another man to touch her, or even get close to her.

The only man that got close to her was Elliot, her very happily married partner. She closed her eyes at the thought of him, she loved him all those years, her heart aching to be with him. Until she met Haden, then Elliot didn't matter as much, and it definitely pissed him off. He never approved of any of her relationships, and it was so frustrating for her, because he would pick at her continually whenever she liked someone.

She was over him now, or atleast she didn't love him as much as she did before. Over the last three years she distanced herself a bit, trying to gain perspective. Before Trevor and her ended up in this situation, she had just finished a screaming match with Elliot. He was mad at her because he found out that her and Trevor were going for coffee, after he represented one of their suspects. It was a mere coincidence however, they didn't plan to go together, they just got free time at the same moment.

She looked up at Trevor "you know, if you weren't at the precinct two months ago, we wouldn't have left the precinct together, I would have gone alone. I would have ended up here alone, I would have never gotten to know the Trevor that I know now, and for the first time I'm actually glad this all happened."

He ran his hand up her back gently "I'm really glad this happened too Liv... But I can't help wondering, if we were to return to New York tomorrow, would this all be left behind. This, us?"

"I don't know, I don't want it to be left behind, but let's face it, we don't know enough about each other to be in an actual relationship." she whispered.

He swallowed the lump in his throat "that is true but the last time I checked we could always get to know each other, I mean we have all the time in the world. Plus I know that what I'm feeling for you isn't just going to disappear when we go back home."

She pursed her lips "we'll take it one day at a time, this getting to know each other business..."

He leaned down and gave her another searing kiss "am I still allowed to kiss you though?"

She blushed "you sure are..."

He pulled her closer to him "are you happy here Olivia?"

"If you mean with you, then yes I am, you've made this so easy and bearable. There are days when I feel that everything is pointless and just want to leave but then you give that charming smile and I decide that maybe being here isn't all that bad."

"I get it, I really do... When we first got here it was difficult but you make it all so much easier." he whispered.

A loud crack of thunder broke the blissful bubble around them, and Olivia gasped in shock, hiding her face in the crook of his neck. She felt his hold on her body tighten a bit, his hand rubbing her naked back.

"there's nothing to be afraid of" he whispered.

She peered up at him and smiled "do you think the storm will let up?"

"I'm sure it will, why don't you try and get some sleep." he kissed her forehead "I'll be right here."

"Goodnight Trevor" she whispered, placing another kiss to his lips.

He cupped her cheek "goodnight Olivia."

...

Olivia woke up with a blissful smile the next morning and rolled over, she frowned when she saw that she was alone. Her mind raced, had last night just been a dream, she let out a soft groan, her eyes tearing up. She couldn't believe she had another dream about him, only this one hit harder, they didn't just have sex, they shared their feelings. That was something she never did with anybody, ever.

She dragged herself into the shower and cleaned up before going downstairs in a tank top and a pair of dark jeans, her hair hung loose around her shoulders. She walked into the kitchen and let out a breath when she saw Eva sipping on a cup of coffee.

Trevor turned to her and gave her a sweet smile, before preparing a cup of coffee for her.

She forced a smile "Hey Eva, good morning honey"

He handed the cup of coffee, before leaning down and placing a chaste kiss on her lips "good morning beautiful... Sorry I had to leave you alone in bed this morning, but we had a guest I had to attend to."

Her face lit up in an instant, she was ecstatic, she hadn't dreamt it all. She gave him another chaste kiss, fighting her urge to deepen it, and gave him a sweet smile when their lips parted "that's okay darling."

Eva picked at one of the muffins on the counter before giving her friend a tight lipped smile "so I saw that Aiden came by yesterday."

She sighed "yeah he did... Where were you?"

"I was upstairs, cleaning up one of the rooms for my cousin, she's flying in tomorrow afternoon."

"Oh, what's she like?"

Eva scoffed "I don't know, I haven't seen her in years. She got married when she turned twenty and ran off with her husband... She's flying in because they got divorced recently and she needs a break from the city."

"Which city?" Trevor asked

"New York" she shrugged.

Olivia let out a nervous laugh "that's a big city, what's her name?"

"Casey, Casey Novak. She used to be Casey Brighten..."

Olivia's eyes widened as she felt all the colour drain from her face. Her entire body stiffened. Trevor looked over at her, and the panicked look on her face, he knew Casey would identify them as soon as she laid eyes on them.

He scratched the back of his neck "does anybody know that she's coming here?"

She shook her head "no, she's running from her ex-husband, not even her coworkers know."

"well wouldn't it be stupid for her to come to her home town if this is where they met?" Olivia questioned.

"they didn't meet here" she said with a scowl "they met in New York, after she finished law school."

"Oh" Olivia said.

Trevor cleared his throat "excuse me. I have to make a call"

"Babe, who are you going to call" she asked with a questioning glance.

He kissed her forehead "relax darling, I'm going to call our agent."

She nodded, knowing exactly who he was referring to, she gave him a tight smile "tell them we're really happy with the house."

Eva furrowed her brow "an agent for what?"

"We hired an agent to get us this place on short notice, we didn't want to do the whole struggle of searching for a place on our own, they got us this place after two days of waiting." she lied.

Eva nodded, buying the story her friend gave her "wow that's fast, y'all must have been super happy."

"We sure were... We just had enough of the wild life of California and decided maybe it'll be best to go somewhere quiet." she said with a small smile, pursing her lips "you know, this way we'll have more time to focus on our marriage..."

"Yeah and you could start a family" Eva added.

Olivia chocked on her coffee, her eyes widening "No, we're good for now. We uhm, we need time for just the two of us, and maybe after a year we'll start a family."

Trevor walked back into the kitchen and caught wind of her last few words, he raised a brow at her "Do you want to start a family?"

She felt her cheeks flush "not right now, we're good the way we are darling."

He wrapped his arms around her waist "damn right we are. I like having you to myself..."

...

**_Okay so I know this was pretty shitty but it'll get better._**

**_Stay tuned to see what happens when Miss Novak shows up._**

**_Let me know what y'all thought about this chapter. Reviews are life._**

**_I love y'all._**

**_-Karrrm._**


	10. Chapter 10

**An Old Face.**

Olivia walked back to the booth and sat down beside Trevor, smirking when she saw him looking down at her cleavage that was popping out of the top of her dress. She placed her finger under his chin, forcing his eyes to focus on her face "my eyes are up here Mr Connor." she smiled.

Eva shook her head at the couple as she sat beside Aiden "you two make me sick."

"thanks for the compliment Eva" Trevor shot back with a wink.

He looked back down at Olivia "why are we in a club again?"

"Aiden invited us to see the club he owns. We're supporting a friend, darling" she whispered back.

Sandy walked over to the group and sat down between Trevor and Aiden, she smirked "I found a waitress and she'll bring our drinks in a few minutes."

Aiden smirked over at Olivia "You look beautiful tonight Julia, that dress really compliments your skin."

She shifted uncomfortably under his stare "thank you."

Sandy rolled her eyes "so why is this the first time I'm meeting you two?"

"You had plans a few days ago when we invited you for lunch" Eva said with a scowl.

"You should have told me Mike is hot, I would have canceled my plans."

"he definitely is hot" Olivia rolled her eyes "and happily married"

Eva smirked, noticing the territorial look on her friends face "Sandy I say back off... You're not getting this one" she whispered.

Sandy scoffed "oh honey, I was taught that perseverance pays off... Plus I don't see you lecturing lover boy" she motioned to Aiden.

Olivia heard what Sandy said but decided not to respond, she wasn't going to let some bimbo ruin her night. She smiled up at Trevor "wanna dance?"

He smirked "I don't dance darling, unless it's slow dancing"

She pouted "please"

"fine, but don't complain if I mess up" he said with a small smile.

She took hold of his hand and dragged him onto the dance floor with her "I just had to get away from the group a bit"

He smiled down at her "I figured as much. Can I kiss you?"

"I wouldn't oppose a few kisses" she said with flushed cheeks.

He leaned down and allowed his lips to meet hers in a gentle yet passionate kiss. Both of their eyes shutting as they shared a brief moment of passion, they broke their kiss when air was needed and gave each other huge smiles.

Olivia felt her cheeks heat up once again as he stared down at her with such intensity, his eyes focused on her gorgeous face. She wrapped her arms around his neck as they moved to the slow song that started playing "this is... Nice"

"which part? Being here, or everything in general?" he asked while leaning closer to her ear so that she could hear him over the music.

"Being here with you, just living without having to worry about being called into work or catching another case. Just living a normal life for once is kind of nice, it's peaceful."

"Does that mean you're thinking of living like this when we get back to New York?"

She pursed her lips, still wrapped in his embrace as they moved to the music "not entirely. I miss my job and the squad, I'll definitely go back to it, I'll just have to try and incorporate this normal life stuff into my schedule."

"Are you nervous about Casey arriving tomorrow?"

"I was this morning when Eva first mentioned it, but after you called Price and Burns I'm not as nervous. She won't blow our cover."

He kissed the side of her head "I'm sure she won't, she'll know that both of our lives are at stake."

She looked up at him "exactly, plus I'm kind of excited to see her, that way I'll feel a bit more at home. Casey and Alex were my best friends in New York, I could go to them for anything, I miss them both so much."

He furrowed his brow "you and Alex were friends?"

"Yeah, why do you ask?"

"We had a very brief relationship, it lasted about two months... Only issue was that we had too much in common."

She pursed her lips "oh... Well that must have been fun" she said, a hint of jealousy in her tone.

"Don't do that"

"do what?"

He peered down into her now tear filled eyes "don't close yourself down, I can see you building your internal walls back up."

She shook her head, it scared her how well he could read her already. He took his time in studying her, he wanted to get to know the real Olivia, the one that didn't just exist in the precinct. He wanted to know everything about her, she fascinated him, he adored her so completely.

She followed him silently back to the table, her small hand clutched in his, her mind however was elsewhere. She wondered how would Alex react if she found out that her best friend slept with her ex boyfriend.

"Juls, you okay?" Eva asked.

She looked up and nodded, settling down beside Trevor "I'm fine"

Trevor let out a sigh as he watched her throw back one of the shots that were on the table, he raised a brow at her "Juls"

She took two more shots before looking up at him "Mike, I'm fine I promise. I just wanna loosen up a bit."

Aiden smirked "in that case I'll go get us some more drinks."

Sandy scowled at Olivia "Julia do you usually drink like a man?"

She scoffed "yeah... Do you usually flirt with married men infront of their wives."

"only when I know that I'll win" she smirked.

Olivia rolled her eyes "can't find a man of your own so you trying to get with mine. How original."

Trevor looked down at Olivia and let out a breath, she was hot as hell when she became possessive, and he loved the way she called him 'her man'.

He allowed his hand to rest on her thigh beneath the table "Sandy I suggest you back off. I'm not interested, I've only got eyes for one lady and that is my wife."

She scoffed "spoil sport" she whispered before taking one of the shots.

Eva forced a smile "this place is getting really stuffed."

Olivia gave her a small smile, grateful for the subject change "yeah... How long has Aiden had this place?"

"seven years, but it was his dream since the age of five" Sandy pipped up.

"Sandy and Aiden know each other since birth, their moms were best friends." Eva explained.

Aiden returned to the table and placed a tray filled with shots in the center of the table, before handing each of them a unique drink as well. Olivia looked down at her drink before leaning up to whisper something into Trevor's ear "I don't trust Aiden, I think he spiked my drink. I may be overreacting but the detective in me is telling me to be cautious."

He gave her a concerned look "do you want to swap drinks then? "

She shook her head "no, I'm going to drink it, just keep your eyes on me, and please don't leave me alone."

He kissed her forehead "I promise I'll be by your side all night."

Aiden narrowed his eyes at the couple "What are you two whispering about?"

Olivia shrugged and smiled "that's private, isn't it honey" she said with a giggle.

Trevor nodded "sure is."

He watched Aiden's expression as Olivia took a swig of her drink. Aiden had a mischievous smirk on his face and Trevor wanted nothing more than to knock it off his face.

Trevor placed his hand on her leg under the table, a way of silently assuring her that he wouldn't let anything happen to her. She gave him a tight smile before finishing her drink and smiling up at the group.

Sandy looked over at Aiden and smirked "Julia why don't you take Aiden for a dance, he's horrible at it and I couldn't help but notice that you were doing some awesome moves out there. You could teach him a thing or two."

Olivia shook her head, feeling the effects of her drink "uhm... Sure"

Trevor kept his eyes on Aiden as they moved to the dance floor, she made sure he could see her from where he sat and allowed Aiden to set the tone of their dancing. Trevor asked a passing waitress to bring him a beer and pushed the drink Aiden brought to the side.

Aiden placed his hands on Olivia's waist and pulling her closer to him "Do you ever wonder what it would be like to be with anyone other than Mike?"

"no I don't." she said in a stern voice "I love my husband, he's all the man I need."

"Then why are you on the dance floor with me and not him?"

She shrugged "because I didn't want to seem rude by turning you down for the second time, but don't get any ideas."

...

Two hours had passed and Trevor all but dragged his 'wife' back to the booth, she was acting out and he knew then that she was definitely drugged. She leaned up against him and let out a laugh "are you my boyfriend?" she asked with a frown.

He chuckled at her confused expression and kissed her forehead, helping her into her seat "no, I'm your husband"

Eva raised a brow at Trevor "Mike is she okay? She looks horrible."

"I'm fine..." she pipped up before turning back to Trevor "your name... What is it?"

"It's Mike."

She smiled "you look like this guy I know... He was hot... His name was uhm, what was his name?"

He shrugged "I don't know, but I do know that it's getting late and we should probably get going."

She shook her head "I don't wanna go... I want to dance and you can kiss me" she whispered, her words were slurred and she was struggling to keep her eyes open.

Trevor let out a breath "come on honey. We're going home, we've been here for hours already."

She pursed her lips before nodding, stumbling as she tried to stand up. She let out a giggle when Trevor caught her and gave him a seductive smirk "you're really hot"

He picked her up bridal style and turned to Eva "are you coming or are you going to get a ride with Aiden?"

Eva shook her head "no, I'll come with you two."

Trevor nodded "we'll be leaving." he told Aiden and Sandy.

Sandy rolled her eyes "why so early, you haven't even danced with me yet"

"my wife isn't feeling too good, she never was much of a drinker so I best get her home. Goodnight." he said before turning and making his way to the exit.

Aiden stopped him "Are you sure you don't want to stay for another drink. I'll fix us all something."

He scowled "no thanks I'm good."

Eva scowled at Aiden and Sandy after Trevor walked out "I can't believe you two actually did that."

Aiden shrugged "you wanted to hang with us then you have to get in the mix of things. Your friend was uptight I simply tried to get her to loosen up, and it would have worked if wasn't for her asshole husband."

"You're both sick" she spat before walking out of the club.

She got into the car and looked over at Olivia who had passed out "you do know that they drugged her right?"

He nodded, starting the car "I do know... She told me when he brought the drink. Julia isn't as stupid as they think she is and if Aiden keeps pushing it I'm going to kick his ass."

"I didn't know about it, I realised when she started acting off, she only had a few drinks so I knew something was up." Eva explained "sorry I brought you both here. If I hadn't insisted on us coming, none of this would have happened."

"Its okay Eva, you didn't know what they were up to."

...

Olivia woke up the next morning and let out a soft groan, her head was pounding. She opened her eyes and tried to focus on her surroundings, realising after a minute or two that she was in her bedroom. She shifted and stopped moving when she felt an arm around her waist, quickly looking down at it.

Her face softened as she recognised the arm that was holding her. She yawned before cuddling further into his embrace, enjoying the heat his body was providing her with.

He stirred slowly behind her and placed a kiss to her shoulder "good morning beautiful. How are you feeling?"

"good morning, I feel like shit" she groaned "what the hell happened last night?"

He sat up, his face covered in worry "you were drugged, can you remember anything at all?"

"I remember us dancing and then someone's hands on my ass, but that's about it. When did we get home?" she whispered, placing her hand on her forehead.

"two hours after you were drugged, I had to carry you to the car and then you passed out."

She looked up at him and gave him a small smile "I'm sure you took good care of me"

He chuckled "I tried, although you did almost blow our cover."

"my head hurts so bad" she groaned again.

"stay right here, I'll get you something for the pain" he whispered, placing a soft kiss to her forehead.

She laid back and watched him walk out of the room, he came back a few minutes later with a glass of water and a box of Tylenols. She sat up and took two of the pills, before taking the glass of water and drinking a massive gulp of water.

He sat down beside her and took her hand "I'm going to get breakfast sorted, you go and take a bath. You need to relax after last night."

She smiled up at him "or you could join me in the shower"

"as tempting as that sounds, I'll have to decline. Eva will be here in about twenty minutes and we both know that she'll have a guest with her."

"I forgot all about that" she sighed "did Price and Burns speak to her?"

"yes they got a hold of her and told her everything. They also told me that she seemed shocked and pissed."

...

Olivia took a relaxing shower before heading downstairs and into the kitchen where Trevor had just finished up the mass of pancakes. She shook her head at him "you cooked for an army"

He chuckled, cupping her cheek "I got a bit carried away didn't I?"

She nodded "you did, but that's okay... It's cute I guess."

"you're cute" he whispered before leaning down and placing a passionate kiss to her lips.

She felt his tongue run across her lips, begging for access, she parted her lips and let out a soft moan when she felt his tongue exploring her mouth. Her hand moved to the back of his neck to keep him in place while the other arm wrapped around his waist and pushed his sweater up, feeling his hot skin against her cold hands.

They pulled apart abruptly when they heard someone clear their throats, both of them turning to look at Eva who stood smiling back at them at the entrance to the kitchen and beside her stood a very shocked Casey Novak.

Eva turned to her cousin and smiled "Cas these are our neighbours and my very good friends, Michael and Julia. Guys this is my cousin Casey."

Casey stared at them with a look of pure shock, she couldn't believe they were really alive. She thought those guys were bullshitting her, but they certainly weren't. Not when she was looking at the very alive Olivia Benson and Trevor Langan.

Olivia extended her hand to Casey "It's lovely to meet you Casey"

She nodded, shaking her hand "i... You..." she let go of Olivia's hand and felt her eyes well up with tears "excuse me for a minute."

Olivia, Eva and Trevor watched as she stormed out of the house. Eva furrowed her brow "what was that about?"

Olivia shrugged "I don't know, but I'll go check on her, give me a minute."

Trevor handed Eva a cup of coffee "I'm sure she'll be fine."

"Yeah... It's just weird to see her acting like that. Will Julia be alright with her?" she asked.

He nodded "yeah, Julia has a way with people."

Olivia walked out and shut the door gently behind her, only to find her friend sobbing on the porch, she sat down beside her "oh Cas, I know this must be so shocking for you, but it'll be okay."

Casey looked up at Olivia "how can you say that? I was at both of your funerals, I bawled my eyes out for both of you only to find out that you're alive. This is bullshit Liv, why the hell would you do this to me, to the squad, we all missed you both so much and you've been alive and fucking up a storm this whole time."

"Cas calm down, it's not like that" she whispered.

She shook her head, pulling away from Olivia "then what is it like, you're telling me that you couldn't reach out at all, you had to just run away and start over. With Langan of all people."

Olivia felt her eyes fill up as she looked at her distraught friend "I didn't have a choice, neither of us did. If I had it my way I would have been back home with the rest of the squad okay... I don't have a choice but to stay here and be happy with what I have until those assholes are caught. You're either with me or against me, these guys want me dead and I sure as hell won't let them get that."

Casey sighed, watching Olivia's tears roll down her cheeks "I can't do this Liv, I can't act like you're someone else and see you and Langan together like it's normal. I won't do it."

"then leave. Get off my porch and don't show your face here again, because I refuse to lose out on the one good thing life has given me through this mess. I've been fighting to stay sane over the last two months and if you can't support me then I don't need you in my life."

Casey stood to her feet "the truth will set you free Liv."

"not in this case, here; the truth will get both Trevor and I killed. If you say anything to anyone our blood will be on your hands, so remember that before you do anything stupid." she said before getting up and walking into her home.


	11. Chapter 11

**Hurt.**

Olivia walked out and sat on the porch beside Casey who had came by after staying away for two whole weeks. She looked over at the woman she thought of as a sister and let out a heavy breath "so... What are you going to do?"

She shrugged, looking down at the black sneakers she wore, the informality of what used to be her home was so unfamiliar to her now. After spending years in New York City, she became accustomed to the city life, she loved her life and her job but she too had to get away from her abusive asshole of an ex husband.

She looked up at Olivia after a few minutes of silence and gave her a tight lipped smile "I'm not going to do anything, I'm sorry Liv... I guess I was in shock, after spending the last two months grieving your death, I just couldn't believe you are alive." she took her friends hand and gave it a comforting squeeze "I'm in no position to judge you when I did the exact same, I ran away without even saying goodbye."

"You didn't have a choice Cas, you had to get away from your ex husband as badly as we had to get away from those guys that are looking for us. I'm just worried about Alex, she lost her two best friends in the space of two months."

Casey nodded "She has been blowing up my phone for the past week, I didn't have the heart to answer it."

Olivia sighed "I wish I could pick up the phone and speak to them but I'm dead to them now so I can't do that."

Casey reached up and wiped the tear that rolled down her friend's cheek "How long do you two have to stay here?"

"Nobody knows. We have to wait until they get all of the guys involved so it's definitely going to take a while."

"that's awful" she sighed before nudging her friend gently "so what's going on between you and Langan?"

Olivia felt her cheeks heat up and shrugged "we're just playing our part as husband and wife I guess."

"Is that why Eva and I walked in on him shoving his tongue down your throat in the kitchen while **_nobody _**was around. There was no reason to act then, so spill." she teased, emphasising the word 'nobody'.

"Well, I guess we're dating now..."

She gasped and squealed like a teenager "How long have you two been dating?"

"uhm about three weeks" she said with a absentminded smile.

Casey smirked "and... Did you have sex?"

She felt her cheeks heat up and couldn't stop the giggle that left her lips as she thought about how he had fucked her into oblivion the night before "maybe"

Casey gasped "oh my god, how was it?"

"it was the best sex I've ever had."

She smirked "god its about time that you're having sex, how long has it been?"

"three years" she said with a laugh.

"Damn Liv, ever heard of a one night stand. It's this thing where you hook up with someone and then run away and forget it ever happened." she said with a laugh.

Olivia shook her head as she laughed at her friend "I'm too old for one night stands darling."

"Nobody is ever too old for sex honey" she said as both of them laughed.

Trevor walked out to find both woman laughing happily "well this is a lovely sight, that I hate to disturb but lunch is ready. Casey why don't you and Eva join us?"

Casey stood to her feet "Eva had to head into the city for a while so it's just me."

He took hold of Olivia's hand and helped her up "well then we'd love for you to join us."

She followed them into their home and sat down beside Olivia at the kitchen island, watching as Trevor plated their meals. She nudged her friend gently "he is good to look at" she whispered.

Olivia let out a soft laugh before nodding "he tastes as good as he looks and feels even better"

Casey gasped "poor man, how does he put up with you."

She handed her friend a glass of wine before shooting Trevor a cheeky wink "he doesn't have a prayer darling."

Trevor shook his head at the woman "I'm going to the city to pick up a few things we'll need for work, do you ladies want to tag along?"

Olivia shook her head "no, we'll take my car and have a mini girls day. We're picking Eva up in twenty minutes."

He grabbed his car keys after handing each of them their servings "well then I'll see you three later." he turned to look at Olivia and gave her a small smile "steer clear of Aiden please and be careful."

She smiled up at him "I'll be fine Trev, see you later."

He nodded before walking out of the house. Casey raised a brow at her "who's Aiden and why should you avoid him?"

"He's an asshole who owns a club nearby, he drugged me the night before you came, but luckily Trevor was there to bring me back home safely." she said with a shrug.

"Thanks for the warning, I'll know to stay away from him"

"Yeah he freaks me out." she whispered "I'm just happy Trevor was there because I don't know what he would have done to me. I couldn't even remember leaving the club."

"So how do you feel about Mr Langan?" she asked, trying to lighten the mood.

Olivia couldn't help the goofy grin that covered her face "I like him, he's sweet, funny, caring and damn good to look at." she let out a loved up sigh "and did I mention that he rocks my world."

"Is he big?"

"huge"

"Control?"

"both"

"Where?"

"Everywhere and anywhere."

"Rough or gentle?"

"Both"

"Oral?"

She smirked "the best"

"So he's definitely satisfying you in the bedroom" she smirked "and in the kitchen, where else does he satisfy you."

"he just makes me happy and he makes me feel safe, we spoke about our pasts and our families. We're taking it one day at a time, plus it helps us play out that we're married."

Casey nodded "you two look really cute together and you look happy."

She blushed "I am, despite everything that's going on he somehow manages to make me feel great again."

...

Casey, Eva and Olivia sat outside a little restaurant eating deserts and laughing as they caught up. Eva raised a brow "so Juls do you remember anything from the other night?"

She shook her head "I remember bits but not much... Mike did however tell me that I was flirting up a storm."

"Yeah you kept telling him how hot he is" she chuckled.

Casey raised her glass "well drugged up Julia speaks facts. Mike is hot."

She let out a soft laugh before raising a brow at Casey "tell us about your ex husband. What was he like?"

"An asshole." she said with a scowl before taking a gulp of her wine "he was a sweetheart when I met him though, charming and funny. He always found a way to make me laugh and it brightened even the darkest days. That all stopped after three years, he started going off on me for the hours I worked, he would argue with me every night and then after a few months he started hitting me."

Olivia furrowed her brow "why didn't you tell anybody or ask for help?"

"I was embarrassed that I let a man do that to me. So I took every beating and covered up the scars the next day before going to the office like everything was fine. My colleagues didn't know I was married" she swallowed the lump in her throat "I didn't even tell my best friends"

"Why not?" Eva asked "would he go after them if they found out."

She shook her head "no it's because I knew that if I told them, they wouldn't just drop it. My friend Olivia would go to my home and probably beat the crap out of him before arresting him and then Alex would be the attorney who would get him locked up. I didn't want that, because even though my life was hell, I still loved him."

Olivia took hold of Casey's hand beneath the table and gave her a reassuring smile "what made you take that step this time?"

She felt her eyes well up and sniffed softly "Olivia died, she uhm... Was shot, and I guess that was enough to make me realise how short life really is. So I filed for divorce and left as soon as I could."

Olivia bit her lip, willing her own tears not to fall. She let out a soft breath "so her death atleast led to a good thing."

She looked up at the woman who she thought to be dead for the past two months and sighed "I guess... But it led to a few other things too, the one man who was like a father to her walked out of his job two weeks after her death because he couldn't handle seeing her empty desk as a reminder every day."

She bit her lip "that's horrible" she whispered before standing up "I have to use the bathroom."

Eva and Casey watched her rush off the bathroom and Eva let out a breath "I'm glad you two are okay, why did you freak out when you saw her."

She shrugged "she looks a lot like Olivia... Just freaked me out a bit."

"maybe they're family" she said with a thoughtful look on her face.

"they're not, I asked"

...

Olivia sat in one of the posh bathroom stalls and quietly bawled her eyes out, she let out a soft sob and covered her mouth with her hand. She couldn't believe it, Cragen had left SVU because of her. She hated that they had to go through all of that pain, that the only family she had was no longer in her life.

Her heart was aching to get out of there, she couldn't take it. Two months had passed and all she wanted to do was get back home to her squad, her family. She knew it would take some more time but she hoped that they could hurry up, so she dialed the number of the marshals and gave them a call to find out if there was any progress.

...

The girls returned to Olivia's place after their lunch, both women noticed the change in her mood since she came back from the bathroom, she seemed angry, irritatable and sad. Casey sat down on one of the sofas and raised a brow as Trevor walked in "hi Mike"

He gave her a friendly "hi Casey, Eva." he walked over to Olivia and leaned down to kiss her forehead "hey beautiful."

She forced a smile "hey honey, how was your day out?"

He sat down beside her "it was okay, I just missed you. How was your day with the ladies?"

"It was great" she said with a tight lipped smile.

Eva smirked "we got our nails done, did a bit of shopping and went for a light meal."

Casey raised a brow at Olivia "you sure you're okay Julia?"

She nodded "I'm fine, just a bit tired"

Eva stood to her feet "well then I guess we'll leave you too it. Casey and I are going out for a few drinks later, you wanna join us?"

"no thanks ladies, I think I'll have an early night and get some much needed sleep."

Casey smirked "pfft, we know you two will probably end up in a compromising position."

He chuckled "I doubt it, I'm tired too, so tonight, we sleep."

She nodded "that is the most perfect idea."

The woman left after a few minutes and Trevor raised a brow at Olivia "are you going to tell me what's really on your mind now?"

She swallowed the lump in her throat "Casey told me that Cragen left svu, because he couldn't handle seeing my empty desk everyday. I called Price and asked him about the case and he told me that they caught two more of the guys, one was in North Carolina..."

He took hold of her hand and gave it a squeeze "Did they say anything else, about when we get to go home?"

She pursed her lips "they said it may take a few more months, there's about four more guys still searching for us..." she snifled "I just wanna go home, I want to see Cragen and tell him that I'm okay."

He pulled her now shaking form into his arms and rubbed her back gently, his own heart breaking at the thought of how the squad was taking this news. He held her and assured her that everything would be fine, making sure she knew that he was right there with her.

She looked up and let out a sigh "When my mom died I was on my own, and then the squad came, they became my family. They were the best thing that ever happened to me, they supported me and loved me... Now the only people that gave a damn about me thinks I'm dead. I just feel so alone"

He cupped her cheek, wiping her tears "they'll be so happy when you get back Liv, they'll understand it all if **we** sit them down and explain it to them. You're not alone, you will never be alone as long as I'm alive, okay?"

"Technically you're not alive but okay" She nodded, sniffling softly

"Don't be a smart ass" He kissed her forehead "I'm right here if you need to speak about anything. I'll listen and help you however I can, I'm here for you Liv."

She gave him a soft peck "can you do something for me?"

"Anything"

A smile tugged at her lips "can we get out of here for a bit tomorrow... Even if we just go for a long drive, I just need to clear my mind."

"I know exactly where we can go, as long as you know it'll just be you and I"

She gave him another soft kiss "I'd like it if it was just us."


	12. Chapter 12

**Glow.**

**_(Smut alert!)_**

Olivia woke up with a massive smile on her face the next morning and smirked when she felt Trevor placing kisses to her neck and shoulders. She let out a soft squeal when he moved on top of her, her eyes meeting his.

She bit her lip "good morning"

He smirked, before leaning down and giving her a passionate kiss. His tongue slipped in between her lips, and explored her mouth for a few minutes before pulling away and giving her a sweet smile "good morning beautiful."

She cupped his cheek "was it your intention to get me worked up this early in the morning counselor?"

He smirked "I would never do such a thing detective."

"I don't believe you, so I might have to punish you" she said with a playful glint in her eyes.

He let out a laugh when she rolled them over, she sat up on his hips and smirked as she rolled her hips against his erection. She ran her fingers up his chest, leaning down to press her lips to his.

Trevor kissed her back with a fiery passion as his hands worked on the buttons of the button down shirt she wore, he pushed the material off her shoulders. A smile tugging at his lips when he felt her silky skin against his hands, he cupped her ample breast and gently kneeded the skin.

Her mouth tore away from his and she let out a moan, feeling his hands on her skin was enough to get the wetness to pool between her legs. He moved his free hand to her ass and gave it one hell of a squeeze causing her to let out another loud moan.

He gently rolled them over again before placing his finger to her lips, silencing her "let me take care of you"

She nodded and let out a soft moan when his lips attached to the skin of her neck, his hand gripping her waist and the other tugging gently at her nipples. Her back arched beneath him when she felt him bite down on her neck, marking her.

Trevor slowly trailed his fingers from her chest to the edge of her silky panties, he eased the thin scrap of material down her legs, his kisses moving down toward her chest which was now raising and falling rapidly. He took her breast into his mouth and sucked at her nipples while two thick fingers slipped into her wet heat.

She groaned, pressing her head back against the soft pillows she groaned, her fingers tangling into his short hair. She felt her breath leave her body when his fingers were replaced by his mouth, she squirmed as his hands held her thighs apart and his tongue flicked at her entrance.

Olivia couldn't believe how good he was at making her crumble, his tongue slipped between her wet folds, while his thumb swiped across her clit. One of her hands held his head in place while the other fisted up the sheets beneath them. Her moans became increasingly louder as she neared her climax, he was devouring her as if she was the last meal on earth.

Trevor smirked against her when he heard her moans increasing, her back arched and her eyes rolled as she lost herself in the thralls of passion. He moved his mouth away from her but continued swiping over clit with his thumb, a smirk on his lips as he looked at her pleasure strickened face.

"Olivia" he spoke in low voice that somehow turned her on even more, she forced her eyes open and looked into his eyes which had darkened with lust "cum for me."

No sooner than the words left his mouth, his tongue swiped over her again, sucking at her wetness. Her back arched and she let out a scream as she came long and hard, her eyes were squeezed shut and she moaned until she fell back against the bed. Her body covered in a sheen of sweat. Trevor lapped up every drop of her sweetness, causing her to shiver and moan again, she let out a heavy breath as she felt the tremendous aftershocks of her orgasm.

He chuckled softly against her still heated core, placing gentle kisses to womanhood. When he was certain she was done, he kissed his way back up her body, his lips meeting hers in a passionate kiss.

Her hand held the back of his neck, keeping him in place while her legs wrapped around his waist. She could taste herself on his tongue and for the first time in her life she actually found it arousing, she moaned into his mouth.

Trevor eased out of their heated kiss and pushed her hair out of her face, he his hand moved down and gripped one of her thighs "you ready?"

She nodded "more than you'll ever know."

He pushed into her slowly, watching her face contort to a look of pleasure as he filled her up to the hilt. He stilled, smiling down at her, she opened her eyes and pushed him onto his back.

She sat up on top of him and sank down onto his erected manhood, her head fell back when she felt him buried deep inside of her. She placed her hands on his chest and slowly began moving her hips. He couldn't handle her slow movements but he knew that he shouldn't rush her, and just enjoy the ride.

She pulled him up, holding him against her body as their hips moved together. Her nails dug into his back when she felt his mouth close around her nipple, she gasped "fuck yes!"

He let out a laugh against her heated skin before trailing his lips back up to her neck and sucking at her tan skin, he loved the taste of her. He wanted to kiss her and make love to her for the rest of their lives, he would never tire of having her like this.

The movements of her hips began speeding up and soon enough her breast were bouncing infront of him as she rode him like a cowgirl. Her moans were much louder and he was certain the neighbours could hear them, not that he minded.

His own groans and pants sounded out in the otherwise quiet room as he felt himself twitch inside of her, he knew it wouldn't be long before he reached his climax. Olivia let out a scream of his name as her inner walls tightened around him and her orgasm knocked the breath out of her lungs.

She threw her head onto his shoulder and screamed as her juices coated his dick, Trevor felt her walls holding him in a vice grip and that did him in. He let out a loud groan of her name as he emptied his seed inside of her, their hands clawing at each others skin.

Her face moved to his and their lips fused together while they rode out their orgasms, she moaned into his mouth, feeling the aftershocks of their lovemaking. Her legs shook around him and he gripped her hips in his strong hands.

After a few minutes she broke their kiss and let out a soft giggle, both of them breathing heavily "well that was one hell of a wake up call"

He laughed, his hand running up her naked back "it sure was, I was just giving you a taste of what the rest of our day will be like."

"Well then I look forward to whatever you've got planned." she whispered, giving him a few more soft kisses.

They laid down after he slipped out of her, she allowed her leg to rest over his hips, her head on his chest as they cuddled up and caught their breath. He placed a few soft kisses on top of her head, his fingers softly trailing against the naked skin of her back.

"you can swim right?" he asked softly.

"yes, why?" she whispered back.

He shuffled a bit until they were laying face to face, he tucked a few strands of her brunette hair behind her ears and gave her a sweet smile "I was just wondering..." he kissed the tip of her nose "as much as I'm enjoying our time in bed, I do believe we need to get ready for our day out."

She let out a breath "is it wrong of me to just want to stay in bed with you for the rest of the day?"

He chuckled "of course it's not, but we can't. Not today at least... I found this cute little spot we could spend the day at, I'm sure you'll love it"

"how far is it?"

"Two hour drive, that my darling, is why we have to get out of bed."

She sat up and let out a breath "this better be good, or I'll make you pay"

He chuckled "how exactly would you do that?"

"I would just refuse to have sex with you" she said with a smirk.

He gasped, feigning hurt "that's a bit much if you ask me... But I can assure you that you will love it."

...

Olivia let out a soft chuckle when they stopped outside a tiny corner store in the city, she raised a brow at Trevor "this was your brilliant surprise?"

He shook his head, laughing at her shocked expression "no it's not. We are going to pick up a few things before we leave, we can snack abit while we drive."

She nodded and took hold of his hand, following him into the store. She shook her head at how secretive he was being, she had been begging him for a clue since they left their home but he shut her down every time. She watched him grab a few packets of crisps and smirked "where are we going?"

"it's a surprise" he shot back with a smirk.

She rolled her eyes "just tell me already"

"nope" he said, popping the 'p'

She huffed, crossing her arms over her chest "if you won't tell me then I won't go with you"

He chuckled before leaning down to kiss her forehead "if you don't come with me you will never know what I had planned."

"Fine" she pouted as she followed him through the Isles.

He filled a basket with snacks and let out a laugh when he saw her face light up at the sight of Oreos. She turned to him with a massive smile "can I get those?"

He chuckled "you sure can"

"Yes!" she let out a squeal and took one of the many bags of Oreos, hugging it to her chest.

Trevor shook his head at her "I swear you're five years old on the inside"

She let out a laugh "well then you're a pedophile, because I'm pretty sure you were eyeing my ass when I bent to get the oreos."

"Your humor is... Different" he said with a smile, taking hold of her hand "come on kid, we have to get going."

She rolled her eyes "who are you calling a kid?"

"you" he said as they walked up to the cashier.

The older man smiled at them "I haven't seen you two around here before and I know everybody in town. Are you two new here, or visitors?"

Olivia smiled, and slipped her arm around Trevor's waist "we moved here a little over a month ago, we stay about a twenty minute drive from town"

He nodded and cashed up their goodies "well then it's lovely to meet you two, I'm Pete"

"I'm Mike and this is Julia" Trevor said, shaking the older man's hand.

Pete handed them their bags and took the money Trevor gave him "It's lovely to meet you both, have a great day, and I hope to see you again"

"Thank you so much, you have a good day too. Bye" Olivia said as they made their way out of the store.

Trevor opened the door for her and scoffed when he saw Aiden coming out of one of the stores close by. He closed the door once Olivia was settled in the car and made his way over to the drivers seat, stopping when he heard someone calling him.

"Hey Mike, are you two okay, I haven't seen you and Julia since the night at the club" Aiden said as he walked over to Trevor.

Trevor scowled "we're good, I have to get going"

"So will I see you two anytime soon?" he tried again

"Don't count on it." he said before getting into the car and driving off.

Olivia let out a breath "what did that asshole want?"

"he wanted to know why we haven't been hanging out with him... Fucking douche" he said with a scowl.

...

The rest of their ride was filled with small talk and Olivia snacking on one of the bags of chips he bought, she offered him some every now and then and hummed softly to the songs on the radio. Her eyes took in the gorgeous scenery around them and she already felt at peace.

Her face lit up when they finally arrived at a massive field that had an obstacle course on it, she turned to face him and gasped.

"Paint ball!?" she sounded more surprised than she wanted to let on, she smirked "I never picked you for a paint ball type of guy."

He took her hand after opening the door "well there's a lot you still have to learn about me darling"

A goofy smile tugged at her lips "are we doing pet names now?"

"if you want" he shrugged.

She leaned up to press a quick kiss to his lips, catching him off guard.

He smirked "what was that for?"

"it's an apology in advance, because you're going to lose" she said before letting his hand go and running over to the guy that had all the uniforms.

He shook his head and laughed before going after her, he greeted the young guy before taking hold of his uniform "thanks Greg"

Greg shook his hand "the obstacle course you booked is through that blue gate. It's reserved for you and your wife."

Olivia furrowed her brow "you booked an obstacle course for us?"

He nodded "yeah I didn't want anybody to see you losing"

"haha" she said with a playful scowl "you're going down."

He watched as she ran into the area reserved for them and hid behind one of the many obstacles, he let out a laugh "she's going to kill me in this"

Greg chuckled "all the best."

Trevor ran into the course, quickly going into hiding because he knew Olivia would get him, what he didn't know was that she spotted him and quickly rushed over to where he was. She tapped his shoulder and smiled when he turned to face her just as she pulled the trigger.

He watched in shock as his white uniform became covered in a smudge of green slime. He chased after her as she ran off laughing, he shot her on her back, laughing when she let out a gasp.

After about an hour both of them were covered in bright colours, Olivia smirked when she felt a hard hit to her chest. She gasped and placed her hand on her chest, crouching down slightly "Trev" she whispered, acting as if she was struggling to breathe.

Worried that he had taken it to far, he rushed over to her and placed his hand on her shoulder, he leaned down "are you okay?"

She looked up slowly before smashing a paint filled balloon on his head, she burst out laughing as the blue slime ran down his head before running off. He chased after her and grabbed hold of her, both of them crashing down onto a hay stack.

They were laughing as they landed, he was slightly on top of her and she suddenly stopped laughing, her paint covered hand moving up to cup his cheek. Trevor looked down at her and smiled, she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen, her beauty blew him away.

He leaned in slowly, their lips meeting in a breathtaking kiss, her arms wrapped around his back while his moved to caress her cheek, his other hand on... well... a different cheek. She couldn't believe how perfect this all was, just being with him seemed to melt all her worries away.

Their lips parted after a minute and massive smiles covered both of their faces instantly, he pushed her hair out of her face and wiped some of the paint off her cheek "you take my breathe away, you are absolutely beautiful Olivia."

She blushed, trying her best to avoid his intense gaze, her cheeks a deep shade of red. She let out a breath before averting her gaze back to his eyes, he seemed to be taking in every one of her features. She gave him a quick peck before smiling "why did we have to buy snacks for paintball?"

He chuckled "the snacks are for later, we're going somewhere else before we head home."

"there's more surprises?" he nodded, she smirked "you really know how to put on a date."

"only the best for my girl"

"I like you" she giggled.

He let out a soft laugh "I like you too"

She let out a loved up sigh before wrapping her arm around his neck again, pulling him in for another deep kiss. She couldn't believe she was doing this, Olivia Benson was making out with Trevor Langan on an obstacle course, she was slowly admitting her feeling to him. Even though they knew the deeper feelings would be harder to talk about. They decided to just go with the flow, keep things light and easy, just enjoying every minute together.

He took her hand into his and felt her cold ring against his warm skin, a smile tugged at his lips, breaking their kiss softly, he peered down at her.

"You know, I really enjoy kissing you"

She giggled "then why did you stop?"

He smirked, kissing the wedding band on her hand "because I can't help thinking about how right this all feels." he kissed the tip of her nose "I like seeing you like this"

"like what?" she whispered

His eyes focused on her gorgeous face once again "you're glowing... Glowing with happiness."


	13. Chapter 13

**Admission.**

Olivia and Trevor left the obstacle course after spending a few more hours there, both of them had pant on their hands, faces and hair and they found it hilarious. She looked over at him and bit her lip, he was so damn handsome.

She shook her head "you know, you're really starting to grow on me"

"you've grown on me too..." he smirked "it's going to be so weird when we get back to New York. Waking up without you in my arms and not sharing a home with you is going to be something I'll have to get used to."

She pursed her lips, she was disappointed but she knew things would probably change when they got back home. She did not take the time to think this all through and certainly forgot that they lead different lives back home. She knew he was right, they would probably live in separate homes and as much as she did not want to admit it, she knew she would miss him. She would miss waking up in his arms, feeling his kiss early in the morning, having him all to herself.

Trevor noticed that she had spaced out and placed his hand onto hers "penny for your thoughts"

She shrugged "it's just, this kind of feels normal to me now... This... Us... Living together and waking up together and just being free, and if I am being completely honest..." she bit her lip, willing herself not to speak.

"if you're completely honest?"

"I don't want it to end, not when it's just getting good. Not when we're just getting good, for the first time ever I am not going to run away from what I want."

He looked at her for a moment before focusing on the road again "and what do you want?"

"Us... I don't want this to end when we get home. I know it's going to be difficult... I just don't want to walk out on something that is making me really happy."

"I'm really happy too, you make me happy... I don't want it to end either" he said with a warm smile.

Olivia looked over at him and gave him a warm smile in return "just bare with me, this feelings business and emotions don't come easy for me. I'm not the type to be this open usually"

"there's no rush"

They arrived at a gorgeous secluded little park area, with a cute lake that had crystal clear waters. The area had a few trees surrounding it, making it the perfect get away from the city.

Olivia watched as Trevor laid out a little picnic blanket followed by a basket. She smirked, watching him take out two glasses and a bottle of wine, he filled their glasses while she dug out the box of chocolates he had in there.

She raised a brow at him "this seems like an actual date now"

"That's because it is" he said with a chuckle "we've been together now for almost three weeks and I haven't actually taken you out on a date, so I figured we could do that now."

She took the glass he offered her and thanked him, before taking a sip of the bubbly liquid. She took in the gorgeous scenery for a minute before shooting him a confused glance "how long did it take to plan all of this?"

"A day... I planned it all yesterday actually, Casey texted me while you three were out saying that you seemed pretty down about Cragen and you missed home. I then decided that maybe we could do something different, just us, to get our minds off everything else."

"I appreciate all of this, it's absolutely beautiful and very peaceful."

He fed her some of the chocolate as they made small talk and relaxed back, drinking their wine and enjoying each others company. Two hours had gone by and neither of them felt the time, they were to busy laughing as they shared stories of their most embarrassing childhood moments.

"Tell me something about the squad, what are they like?" he asked with a small smile.

"Well Cragen is very strict, not a man of many words and I swear I miss him calling Elliot and I into his office whenever we caught on crap. Somehow he just always found this out, he just had this way of knowing everything. Although the rest of the squad often teased that I get away with the most crap because according to them I'm his favourite."

He chuckled "well are you?"

She pursed her lips before letting out a laugh "of course I am."

"And the rest of them, what are they like?"

"Munch is cool, always has a story to tell and he makes the most inappropriate jokes, also he loves conspiracy theories. Fin well, I don't know what Fin does when he's not at the precinct, he's cool thought. He's like my big brother, always looking out for me and always taking my part if I got into an argument with anyone. He also teaches me how to rap and do a whole lot of other things that I shouldn't have done."

"Can I get a few examples of what these other things are?"

"Well once we were working a shitty case and Elliot may have gotten injured because of me, so I was feeling super guilty and horrible. Then Fin found out what happened and comes to me to cheer me up, and eventually we ended up smoking weed together. Cragen nearly killed us, because Fin was perfectly fine, but I was a mess. I had to interrogate the suspect but I was so stoned that I could not stop laughing and then when he pulled me out of interrogation, I got the munchies and went to buy a bunch of crap while I was supposed to be working."

Trevor laughed "Olivia Benson high, now that's a sight I want to see"

She shook her head "oh hell no. I nearly lost my job, I'm never doing that again."

"I'll arrange with detective Tutuola to make it happen when we get back" he teased.

She shot him a middle finger before shoving another chocolate into her mouth "we had this one woman, who came for training to be a detective, she was hilarious. She was always messing up and ruining everything, she nearly got Elliott shot one day, I was howling with laughter when he came back and told Cragen to get the killer clutz off the squad."

He laughed "and did he?"

She nodded "he didn't really have a choice, she was constantly putting us all in danger. She got transfered out of the squad and went on to be a lawyer, not sure if she ever came that far though."

"What was her name?"

"Jane Beck" she said before letting out a laugh "she tried to hit on me once."

He laughed "what happened?"

"well we all noticed that she had been making eyes at me for a while and then one day, we were in a squad car together. I decided to drive and Munch sat passenger while Fin, Elliot and Beck sat at the back. So I pulled up outside of the place we had to get to and I asked 'do I look straight?' and Beck answered from the back seat saying 'not in the slightest.' The guys found it hilarious and started snickering while I informed her that I was referring to my parking. Then she looked me dead in the eyes and said 'well in that case it's fine.' Let's just say I never heard the end of it."

He howled with laughter at the thought of it "that must have been fun."

"She flirted with me for weeks, always thinking that I had a thing for her... I was so happy when she left" she said with a giggle.

He cupped her cheek "that's really cute you know... That little giggle of yours"

She closed her eyes, a smile playing on her lips "it feels like it's been forever since I've had this much peace."

"I can agree on that much, it has been a while since I just sat back and enjoyed a day."

Her eyes moved away from his, settling on the gorgeous lake nearby, she smirked "wanna go for a swim?"

"In the lake?"

"Yeah, it is safe... Come on" she said, standing up and taking off her sweater.

Trevor let out a soft groan when he saw her red bra coming into view, he watched her as she stripped down. A smirk on her lips when she turned her back on him and bent down to pick up her discarded clothes, giving him an eyeful of her firm backside.

She gasped when she felt his body pressed against hers "Trev..."

He smirked, holding her hips "you're a damn tease."

"Me? I'm just getting ready to swim darling." she whispered before breaking free and strutting over to the glorious looking water.

Trevor watched her every step and let out another groan "she's going to be the death of me." he whispered before getting undressed and going into the clear water.

They swam about for a while, both of them laughing as they splashed each other with water, she swam up behind him and splashed the water all over him. He laughed as she tried She swim away from him, he liked seeing her this care free.

Olivia saw the intense look on his face and slowly made her way toward him, she couldn't deny the fact that had this magnetic pull toward each other. This was all so new to her, being this insanely attracted to someone, so much so that she couldn't go too long without craving to feel the heat of his body against hers. She craved the feel of his hands on her skin and it scared the life out of her.

He looked down at her, her hair in messy curls around her glowing face. He saw that tell tale twinkle in her eyes and he knew, he knew that he would have her again before they left. Her arms instinctively snaked around his shoulders, their bodies instantly moving closer. His arms made their way around the smooth skin of her waist and he leaned down to give her a loved filled kiss.

Their lips met in the most gentle kiss either of them experienced and they took their time. Not going at it like two horny teenagers, no they moved at a steady pace, making love right there in the water.

Olivia came long and hard, a soft moan leaving her lips as she crumbled in his arms for what felt the millionth time in the space of three weeks. He had managed to make her crumble in the best ways possible, holding off his own orgasms until he was certain her needs were met. She had never met anyone like him, never had someone hold off their own pleasure just to give her what she needed. She pressed her lips to his, drowning out their increasing moans.

Once they came down from their highs, they made their way out of the water, both of them redressing themselves, well without their now soaked underwear. She settled beside him and ate of the snacks they bought, taking his phone and playing a bit of soft music to drown out the silence around them.

He gave her a few little pecks, before shaking his head "you have no idea how just being here with you makes me feel"

She raised a brow "I think I have an idea counselor, if what just took place in the water was any indication."

"Always with the dirty thoughts... If I didn't know any better I'd say that you have a sex addiction." he teased.

"Hey I like being intimate, although most people think I'm heavy on chastity and don't enjoy thinks like sharing passion..."

"At one point I thought that too, I won't lie, I thought you hated men, because I would always hear about you ending a relationship abruptly or see you drowning yourself in work. I always wondered, if you let your hair down and let loose from time to time. That's why this has been a great experience, I get to see Olivia Benson, the person, not the detective. I like seeing you like this, without the weight of the squad and the cases on your shoulders."

She looked up at the sky, which was starting to darken as the evening crept in slowly "I had my thoughts about you too, but you proved every one of them wrong. I thought that you were a jackass, a self-centered, justice hating, piece of crap. I always wondered how you could help those monsters stay off the streets and I won't lie at one point I wondered if you thought what they did was right, if you defended them because you agreed with it all."

He cupped her cheek gently, looking into her tear filled eyes "I would never, ever condone rape. I never agreed with it and I never enjoyed it, I just figured that so many innocent people have gone to prison because of bad representation. So maybe if I represented the accused I could keep innocent people out of prison, only issue is that most of my cases are for svu and I don't want to have to work against you ever again."

She allowed a single tear to roll down her cheek "so you're telling me that when we get back you'll walk out of defences cases, just for me... Why would you do something that major for me?"

He peered down into her eyes and squeezed her hand "because I know how important this is to you, how important it is to keep those guys off the streets. I know that you would hate it if I did defense cases because then we would be working for opposite sides. I know you would be hurt if I continued with those cases, and I could never hurt you. I never want to see you hurting and crying because of me." he wiped the tear that fell from his eye "I need you to know that I mean it."

She bit her lip, her small smile tugging at her lips "you like me that much huh?"

He shook his head, a serious look on his face as he peered down into her brown eyes "No, I don't like you... I love you Olivia."


	14. Chapter 14

**Good News?**

"Trevor we..." she started but was cut off by him placing his finger on her lips.

"Don't do that"

"Do what?"

"Try to talk me out of loving you, nothing you say or do will change my mind. I know it's still very early in our relationship, and I don't expect you to say it back because I can clearly see that you are not ready yet and that is okay. There's no rush, no pressure okay?"

She nodded, a smile tugging at her lips "how do you do that?"

"what?" now he was the confused one.

"Take away all my worries, ease my fears... It is something, new..." she whispered.

He chuckled "that's what a boyfriend is supposed to do"

She let out a giggle, the word 'boyfriend' made her feel like a giddy teenager. She moved over and cuddled up in his arms as they laid back and looked up at the stars that now filled the night sky. She let out a breath "this whole day has been perfect"

"I could not agree more, thank you for agreeing to all of this..." he said, placing a soft kiss to her forehead.

She looked up at him and pouted "stop being so damn sweet, you're making this feelings business difficult."

He chuckled "how am I doing that by being myself?"

"You're making me fall for you"

He cupped her cheek "well that kinda is the point darling... I would not want to be in a one sided relationship."

"this is not one sided... I just..."

"Shh, you are over thinking this... I get it, I understand, you don't need to explain yourself."

She nodded with a small smile, before pouting again. He chuckled at her cute expression "What is wrong babe?"

"it's been an hour since you kissed me" she said with a smirk.

He let out a hearty laugh before leaning down and giving her a gentle kiss, she smiled against his lips, her hands pressed against his chest. He took hold of her hand and squeezed it "we should get going soon."

She wrapped her arms around his neck "do we have to go?"

"Unfortunately we have to go... Although I would love to just stay here with you." he whispered, wrapping his arms around her waist.

She sighed "fine... But when we get back, we are taking a shower together and then I'm going to cook, wearing nothing but your shirt, and you are going to keep your hands to yourself. After dinner we can watch a movie or just relax a bit."

He raised a brow at her "just relax you say... Nothing else"

"that's right, nothing else" she teased.

...

**_Three Months Later:_**

Olivia walked over to Casey and handed her a glass of champagne "this is a nice place you got here Cas... I'm really proud of you"

"Thank you Olivia" she said as she hugged her friend.

"So what made you decide to buy this place" she asked, taking a seat at the little island.

Casey shrugged "I figured that if I have to stay here then I might as well get settled, I can't be slumping on Eva the whole time."

Trevor walked over to the woman and sat down with a smile "Casey I feel like I should get the words 'I'm married' tattooed on my forehead... If another one of your friends try to shove their silicone filled boobs in my face I might have to open a few cases."

Olivia placed her hand on his thigh and gave him a small smile "calm down counselor, they are just testing the waters"

He smirked "I feel like my wife should be a little more angry about this"

She let out a laugh "there's no point in being angry when I know you'll come home to me either way."

"She has a point" Eva said as she sat down at the table.

Trevor kissed the side of her head "I'll give you three some space, I just needed a bit of strength."

Olivia smirked before leaning up and pressing a very steamy kiss against his unsespecting lips. She pulled away and let out a laugh when she saw the looks on Eva and Casey's faces. Trevor raised a brow at her "that was exactly what I needed"

She wiped the bit of lipstick off the top of his lip "you're welcome"

Casey scoffed playfully as Trevor walked away "you two are literally making me jealous and I hate you for it"

Eva nodded "they always remind me of how single I am"

"We don't do it on purpose..." she said with a small smile.

A red haired woman walked over to the group and sat down beside Casey, while Eva took the seat that was previously occupied by Trevor. She looked over at Olivia and stretched her hand toward her "hi I'm Jenna"

"Julia, it's lovely to meet you"

"likewise... I haven't seen you here before, did you come from New York with Cas?" she asked before taking a sip of her cosmopolitan.

She shook her head "no, my husband and I moved here five months ago"

"So how do you all know each other?"

Eva threw her arm around Olivia "she's my neighbour and since the day we met, we have been great friends."

Olivia nodded "that is true... Eva has been a massive help to Mike and I, with adapting to the new area and even just getting out of the house."

"Wait your husband's name is Mike?"

"yes, why?"

"As in the tall, hot guy with the gorgeous eyes"

She chuckled "that's him"

Jenna furrowed her brow "you're telling me that you are married to that hunk of a man?"

Casey rolled her eyes "Jenna you're acting like it's hard to believe."

"Because it is... He's so handsome and don't get me wrong, you're really beautiful Julia but you two just don't match"

Olivia shrugged "I guess opposites attract."

She scoffed "I don't buy it... Were you two like high school lovers who accidentally fell pregnant and then had a shotgun wedding and stayed together for the sake of the kid? Because that seems like a believable reason."

Casey scowled at the red headed woman "isn't that what happened to you Jenna... Well all except the staying together part."

Olivia sighed "Casey don't... I don't need you to defend me and I don't take any offense to what Jenna said. For the record, no we weren't high school lovers who had a kid, Mike and I don't have any children. We met, we became friends and after a short while we started dating."

Trevor walked over to the group of women and placed his hand on Olivia's arm "sorry for interrupting ladies, but I need my wife for a minute"

She looked up at him "is something wrong?"

"No, we just have some unexpected guests"

She stood to her feet and smiled at the women at the table "ladies I'll be back in a bit."

"No problem Juls" Eva said with a smirk "Mike you better not be pulling her away for a quickie."

He let out a laugh "I can assure that wasn't the plan but I might just do it in future"

Olivia shook her head before taking hold of his hand "come on sweet talker, let's go so that we can get back."

They made their way down the street, Casey's new place was about three houses down from theirs. They were proud of her for not only buying the place, but getting a job and starting to build her life up again. Olivia looked up at Trevor as they walked "Price and Burns?"

He nodded "yeah they called to tell me that they were outside and that they have news for us."

She sighed "I am not getting my hopes up again, not after what happened the last time they told us that."

He squeezed her hand "no matter what they say, we've got each other"

"And I would not have it any other way." she whispered as they neared their home.

They let go of the others hands and walked up to both men, Olivia raised a brow at them as Trevor opened up the door "are you two here to give us more bad news?"

Burns smirked "not this time darling, but before we speak, I want something to eat and a beer, I've been driving for hours."

"Where's your drivers?" Trevor asked, seeing as they always had two other guys driving their van.

Price sat down opposite his partner "Jerry got shot about two weeks ago, and Liam got sick after having his partners blood all over him."

"What happened? Who shot him?" Trevor asked.

"Those assholes who were after you did it, we found them in a warehouse and had a little shoot out" Burns said with a scowl.

Olivia handed each of them a plate of the steak Trevor grilled up the night before paired with an ice cold beer, she sat down beside Trevor and furrowed her brow "Did you atleast get them?"

"We got four guys, two were killed, because they would not stop shooting at us so we had to end it, and the other two, who I'm guessing was the brains behind it all, gave themselves up." Price added.

"But, we found out that the brain guys tracked you both, and there was another four on their way to Oregon to kill you both... Idiots stopped at an old cop bar just outside New York, which they clearly didn't know was a cop bar, we stopped there for a bit and caught the bastards." Burns said before taking a swig of his beer.

Olivia's face lit up "Does that mean we're going home with you?"

Price shook his head "not yet... We have to clean up a few things and get both of your funds and crap sorted. Also you may wanna start looking for apartments online, since you'll both be homeless. Trevor your cash will take about a week or two to clear, so you might have to stay here until then. We don't want you two to be broke and begging."

"plus we need to meet up with all of your family and friends, and explain to them what happened, we don't want any issues or backlash that might be our fault."

Olivia sighed "so you both promise that we'll get back no later than two weeks from now?"

"Scouts honour" Burns pipped up.

She chuckled "you're not scouts but I'll take your word for it."

Price looked around the place as he ate, his eyes focusing on a picture that stood up on the fireplace, they were laying in each others arms on what looked like a feild, massive smiles on both of their paint covered faces "that's a new picture... It's cute."

Trevor smirked when he saw Olivia's cheeks turning a light shade of red, he threw his arm over her shoulders "thanks... It was taken three months ago."

"So you two are dating now?" Burns asked with a smirk.

Olivia looked up at Trevor and smiled "yeah, we are."

A massive smile spread on Burns' face "firstly it is about damn time, secondly pay up asshole."

Price sighed before handing his partner a hundred dollar bill "fuck you."

Trevor watched Olivia walk out of the room and laughed "did you two really make a bet about us?"

"Yeah" Price nodded "I said no, you two hate each other too much to hook up and this ass said that all that hate will add up to sexual tension eventually. Guess he was right"

Trevor shook his head "We don't hate each other..." he sighed "We just never got along because of our jobs, with that out of the way we could get to know each other better... Excuse me for a minute, I just need to check on Olivia, she's been feeling a bit sick for a few days already."

He left the two men to finish their meals, walking into the bathroom where he found Olivia kneeling in front of the of the toilet, he held her hair back and rubbed her back, until she had finished. Once she finished, she flushed before letting out a breath "I am going to kill you if you got me knocked up."

He helped her up and allowed her to brush her teeth, before cupping her cheek and placing a loving kiss against her forehead "why don't you take some time off and go to a doctor, you've been sick for a few days and we can't just ignore it."

She sighed "fine, but please don't get your hopes up... It might be nothing."

"I know, but I think you should take a home pregnancy test, just to be sure." he said with a concerned look on his face.

She ran her hand through her hair "fine, if it will set your mind at ease I'll do it."

...

Casey raised a brow at Olivia as she and Eva sat on the sofa beside their friend, all three woman waiting on the timer of the pregnancy test to run out. She tucked a piece of hair behind Olivia's ear "you're going to be fine... Even if you are pregnant."

She scoffed "Cas this is the seventh test I've done over the last two days, I doubt that all six could be wrong."

"But you have all the symptoms of pregnancy" Eva pipped up.

"I could just have a stomach bug or something, but I think six tests should be enough to tell the truth."

"When is your doctors appointment?" Casey asked.

She pursed her lips, a frown on her face "tomorrow morning." she felt her stomach clench once again and made a dash for the bathroom.

Casey went after Olivia while Eva checked the test that went off as soon as both woman rushed to the bathroom. She sighed as she looked at the test and rolled her eyes "great... Yet another"

She walked to the bathroom and leaned up against the doorway "results are in... Sorry Juls, it's negative."

She let out a sigh of relief, her heaving had stopped a few minutes before Eva came. She ran her hand through her hair "that is absolutely perfect... I'm not ready for a baby and neither is Trevor"

Eva furrowed her brow "who is Trevor?"

She gasped, realising what she just said "I uhm..."

"Julia are you having an affair?" she asked before Olivia could explain.

She shook her head "no, I just..." she sighed "just let me clean up a bit and then I'll explain everything to you"

Eva ran a hand through her hair and sighed "you're making me nervous."

"trust me, you might wanna get us all a drink, because this is going to take some time." Casey added, leading Eva out of the bathroom so that Olivia could clean up.

Eva's mind was racing, what was her friend going to tell her? Who the hell was Trevor? She had so many questions and she intended on getting an answer for every one of them. She raised a brow at Casey "What she's about to tell us, is it good news?"

"That depends on what you consider good news."

She frowned "wait so you know what she's going to tell me?"

She nodded "I do... I knew from the start, and maybe it will help you understand a few other things."


	15. Chapter 15

**Complicate.**

Olivia explained everything to Eva and let out a breath, she looked at the woman who she considered a best friend and felt a lump in a throat at the look of disgust on Eva's face.

Casey nudged her cousin "Eva say something?"

"so your name is Olivia, and you're a detective?"

She nodded "I am, and Trevor isn't my husband... We are dating though"

She shook her head "so this whole time you've been lying to me. Both of you are fucking liars, I don't want to speak to either of you again!"

Olivia got up and went after Eva "Eva wait... Please, I didn't have a choice"

"You had a choice, I would never out you or Trevor. I trusted both of you and this was what you did to me." she whispered with tears in her eyes.

"Eva please" she said, feeling her guilt building up.

Casey sighed as Eva walked out of the house, slamming the door behind her "she'll get over it Liv"

"I don't blame her, we betrayed her" she sat down with a sigh "what if the squad reacts like this when we get back, I would not be able to live with them resenting me."

"The squad would never resent you, they'd be too happy to see you again... Eva will be back tomorrow and I'm sure she will come and apologise." Casey said with a supportive smile, she wiped the tears that rolled down her friends cheek.

Olivia pulled away from Casey's grip and rushed to the bathroom again, she felt like she couldn't keep anything down at all. She kneeled infront of the toilet pot and emptied out the contents of her stomach, tears streaming down her face as Casey held back her hair and rubbed her back.

When she eventually finished Casey let her clean herself up before giving her a bottle of water, she thanked her friend before laying down on the sofa opposite Casey. She was exhausted, her body felt drained and for some reason she was in excruciating pain.

Casey covered her friend with the throw that rested over the back of the sofa, watching as she fell into a stress induced sleep. She sat down opposite her sleeping friend, deciding that she'd much rather stay with her until Trevor returned from work. Olivia was given the week off because of her being sick, so Casey took to coming by to check on her and making sure she had everything she needed.

Trevor walked in about two hours later and chuckled softly when he found both women asleep on the sofa's, he nudged Casey gently "hey, how has she been?"

Casey rubbed her eyes and let out a yawn "not good, we got another negative so she definitely can't be pregnant, seven tests can't lie... Also Eva and her had a little break out"

He frowned "about what?"

"She accidentally let your real name slip out and had to explain everything to Eva, because Eva thought she was having an affair..." Casey started

"She hates me" came the quiet voice from the other sofa.

Trevor turned to look at Olivia, he leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead "I'm sure she just needs to process everything"

She stood to her feet and wrapped her arms around his waist, letting out a soft sob, all of this stress was driving her insane "I just wanna go home... I'm tired of all this crap, I just want my life back."

He rubbed her back gently, holding onto her shaking form. He knew this whole ordeal was taking it's toll on her "shh babe, next week this time we will be home. I'm going to check in on Eva, will you try and eat something before I go?"

She shook her head "I can't keep anything down"

"I know, but you have to eat in order for you to get better... Will you atleast try?"

Casey got up from where she was lounging and did a massive stretch before turning to the couple "I might know something that you'll be able to keep down. When I was pregnant, I ate Chicken salad for weeks, because it was light enough for me to keep it down."

Olivia furrowed her brow "when were you pregnant?"

She shrugged "almost three years ago, I only made it to four months"

"What happened?" Trevor asked as he and Olivia followed her into the kitchen.

"I had a miscarriage... I've been on the pill ever since"

"I'm so sorry Cas" Olivia said, moving over to her friend.

Casey shrugged "I'm okay Liv, I cried my tears and I dealt with it"

Trevor gave Olivia a quick kiss "I am going to Eva for a few minutes, I'll be back..."

She watched him walk out and sighed "he's too good to be true"

"Hey, don't start with that crap" Casey pipped up while cooking up the chicken.

"What crap?"

She shook her head "I know you Liv... You're going to say that he's too good for you, then you're going to leave him when things get too serious and you'll say you let him go because he deserved someone better than you. Then you will realise you made the biggest mistake of your life when it's too late to get him back and you'll-"

"Not this time... I know that I have something unique with Trevor, and I know I won't find anyone like him again. He is the gentlest lover I have ever had... Plus, he loves me" she cut in with flushed cheeks.

Casey furrowed her brow "wait... Did he tell you?"

She nodded "yeah..."

"When? Why didn't you tell me?"

"It was three months ago, on our little get away" she said with a massive smile.

Casey let out an excited squeal "I can't believe this!!! Wait..." she raised a brow "Did you say it back?"

Olivia shook her head "not yet..."

"Do you love him?" she asked with narrowed eyes.

Olivia bit her lip, her cheeks turning a deep shade of red. She shrugged, not sure how to answer her friend, she had never admitted her romantic feelings to anybody, ever.

Casey let out another high pitched squeal "Your face said it all!!"

...

Eva opened the door and scowled when she saw Trevor standing there "I don't want to see you."

"but I need to see you" he said, stopping her from closing the door.

She sighed "come in... You have five minutes and then I want you out"

He followed her to the living room and sat down opposite her "so Liv explained everything to you?"

"Yeah she told me all about how you are both liars and have been putting up one hell of an act for the past few months." she spat.

"Eva you need to take every little detail into consideration here, we did not want to do any of this but we didn't have a choice. If Olivia had told you who we really are and why we came here, you could have been in danger too. If those guys found us and you knew who we really are, they would have gone after you as well. The types of criminals we were dealing with are not the type to have loose ends lying around. Olivia wanted to tell you the truth, she really did, but I had to stop her because it was too dangerous."

"So you are telling me that she was going to tell me if you hadn't stopped her?" she scoffed "I don't believe you."

He sighed "you don't have to believe me, I just came here to set things straight and because I can see how much this is bothering Olivia... I know this is shocking to you but it wasn't easy for us either, we had to pack up and let go of everything in our lives, and if you think about it, we'll be doing the exact same thing again... Olivia adores you, she calls you her best friend and she is not the type to let people get as close to her as you did. So please, think about what you're doing... We leave for New York in a few days, is this really how you want your friendship to end?"

She shrugged "your five minutes is over... Get out."

He nodded, stretching his hand out to her "go well Eva... I hope to see you sometime again"

She watched him walk out of her home and let out a breath, her mind was running a mile a minute. She knew this was all so crazy, Olivia had been nothing but an amazing friend, one that she could tell anything to. She was just hurt, she wished this was all some kind of sick joke and she could just get her friend back.

...

Olivia cuddled up to Trevor as they laid in bed "so what you're telling me is that Eva hates me"

"That is not what I said... She just needs time to get things straight, she needs to think this through." he tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear "but I don't want to talk about her anymore... Why do you want to cancel your doctors appointment?"

"because I figured that we might as well do everything when we get home, the blood test will take a few days before we get the results" she explained.

He raised a brow at her "or is it because you're scared about the possible results? We leave for New York in next week, the results will take up to three or four days."

She sighed "fine... I'll go, but only if you go with me, the thought of being pregnant terrifies me and I'll need someone to keep me calm while they do the test."

"of course I'll go with you darling..." he cupped her cheek "I love you Olivia"

"I know you do" she whispered, brushing her lips against his, she pulled away after what felt like a second, she cupped his cheek and allowed a small smile to tug at her lips "is it crazy that a small part of me doesn't want to go back? I feel like we have all of this, this... Us, here and I'm scared that we'll lose it back home."

He took her hand and kissed the back of it "I'll stay as long as you want me to, and what I mean by that is, I won't leave you unless you down right force me to. You mean way too much to me"

"you mean a lot to me as well... I know it may not seem like it because I haven't said those three words yet, but I do care for you and I have feelings for you. Very strong feelings."

"Olivia you don't need to explain it to me, I can feel it and see it everytime I'm with you. I know it because of the way that brilliant smile of yours covers your face whenever I walk into a room, and because of how you react everytime I touch you. The way your body responds to me is enough to tell me that this, us, was no accident."

He leaned forward and gave her the most loving kiss she had ever felt, awakening every nerve in her body, and suddenly he stopped. Easing out of their kiss, he cupped her cheek again "I hope you are pregnant... I would love to see a mini you or me running around, to see you holding a baby, our baby would be an absolute honour. I know it's all so early, but just the thought..."

"is enough to make me think of forever" she finished, their noses still touching. A smile tugged at her lips, knowing that he was shocked "you wrote a little note, it was like a poem, I found it in your drawer while packing your sweaters away. It's named after me, but it's incomplete... I love it." she whispered before kissing him again.

...

Olivia looked up at Trevor as he sat beside her in the waiting room, a nurse had just assured them that the doctor would see them in a few minutes and they were both nervous of the possibilities. She let out a breath "Trev what if I am pregnant, what are we going to do?"

"If you are pregnant, we will take it one day at a time... And I will be with you every step of the way." he whispered.

The nurse popped into the waiting room, and smiled at the nervous looking couple "Doctor Alexandra is ready for you Mrs Connor"

She stood to her feet, clasping her hand into his, they followed the nurse silently into the doctors room and sat down. Doctor Alexandra smiled over at the couple "good morning Mr and Mrs Connor, what brings you here today?"

Olivia shuffled nervously in her seat "I uhm... I haven't been feeling well recently. I have been throwing up for a few weeks and I have horrible headaches, I'm constantly exhausted and I have this extreme pain over my abdomen that won't ease up."

"When was your last period?" the doctor asked.

She scratched the back of her neck "I can't remember, about a month or two ago"

Doctor Alexandra nodded, before raising a brow at the couple "I'm going to assume that you two are sexually active" they nodded "have you been using any kind of protection, or Birth control pills?"

Both of them shook their heads, their cheeks turning a slight tinge of red. Olivia sighed "we were not trying for a baby but we were not taking precautions either."

"Well I can do a blood test but the results may take a day or two to get back, and it's very obvious that you both want to know... So our other option would be an ultrasound, if you want I could do one right now, I should be able to see if you're pregnant or not and just to be on the safe side I want you to go to the bathroom and do another test."

Trevor nodded, a small smile on his lips as he squeezed her hand "we would love that actually... We would like to know as soon as possible."

Doctor Alexandra nodded, handing Olivia a pregnancy test"okay you go do your thing and then you'll both follow me into the ultrasound room."

Olivia felt her heart beating rapidly in her chest, she was utterly terrified, she was not ready to have a baby. The reality of the situation was scaring her and she had no idea how she would deal with carrying a baby and returning to work. Her mind was racing and she was certain that life would only get more complicated from today onwards. She walked into the bathroom and did what she had to do, before washing her hands and heading back to the doctors room. They waited patiently for a few minutes and gulped when they heard the little beep to single that the five minutes were up.

Doctor Alexandra looked down at the test and cleared her throat before standing to her feet "let's go get that ultrasound"

She laid down and watched as Doctor Alexandra waved the wand over her flat stomach, three sets of eyes glued to the screen infront of them. She looked at the screen and felt her lower lip begin to quiver, her breathing was speeding up and she was certain that her tears would not stay at bay.

Doctor Alexandra frowned "something is not right here" she whispered.

Trevor frowned "what is that sound?"

Doctor Alexandra let out a breath before looking up at the couple "that is your baby's heartbeat... Mrs Connor, you seem to be about 11 or 12 weeks pregnant, the test was possitive."

"Then why does it look like there's a massive whole in my womb?" she asked, pointing to the screen with a shaking finger, their eyes focused on the image that seemed nebulous to the couple .

Doctor Alexandra sighed "That is not your womb"

"So what exactly are we looking at?" Trevor asked, watching the tears fall down Olivia's cheeks.

"I'm so sorry" Doctor Alexandra whispered, getting emotional at the sight of the now desperate couple.


	16. Chapter 16

**Old Faces.**

Olivia sniffled as she looked at Doctor Alexandra "what is wrong?"

Doctor Alexandra felt a tear roll down her cheek and sighed "I'm sorry Mr and Mrs Connor, but that is an ectopic pregnancy... We will have to end your pregnancy before it causes any damages to your body"

Trevor pulled Olivia into his arms when she started crying, he was torn apart by the fact that their baby was growing inside of her and had to be killed off, but also knew that if they did not terminate her pregnancy both her and the baby would be in danger. He rubbed her back gently, his own tears falling in torrents down his cheeks, they did not plan on having a baby, but that didn't change the pain they were feeling in that moment.

Olivia let out a sob before looking up at Trevor "I'm so sorry, I know how excited you were to have a baby and I couldn't even do the one thing my body is supposed to. I'm sorry for failing you"

He shook his head "you never failed me darling... Yes this hurts, but we will get through this, you and I. We will get through this and maybe in future we could try again, but that would be entirely up to you. I love you"

"I love you too" she whispered before cuddling back into his embrace and crying for what she knew was a done deal, the life they created was going to be killed all because her body didn't do it's job and she felt guilty as hell for it.

Doctor Alexandra had left to give the couple some time to process the bad news they had just received. She knew they would need time to recover from the blow life had just dealt them, she knew they were hurting and she wished that things were different.

...

Olivia sat on their bed and looked up at the picture on the wall, it was a picture Casey took a few nights ago at Eva's birthday get together. Everybody got all dressed up in fancy clothes and gathered at a massive hall to celebrate Eva's 30th birthday. She remembered how Trevor could not take his eyes off her that night as she walked around in that tight red dress with the plunging sweat heart neckline. She remembered how she purposefully showed that much cleavage just to drive him crazy, and it had worked, he couldn't keep his hands off her.

_Now he won't even look at me. _

She shook her head to rid herself of the thoughts that filled her mind, she was supposed to be resting and preparing herself for the surgery that would kill their baby. Her hand rested on her stomach and she let out a soft sob "I'm so sorry baby... That I couldn't carry you, for not being able to protect you like a mother should. I know I failed both you and your father, he was so excited to have a baby and I ruined it for him, he doesn't deserve this."

Trevor stood outside their bedroom and heard her crying as she spoke to their baby, his heart broke for her. His own tears falling down his cheeks, he just wanted his girl back, she had been so happy these last few months and it seemed life was ruining that for them. He walked into the bedroom carrying a bowl of soup, he sat down beside her and let out a breath "Livia you need to eat something"

She shook her head "I'm not hungry"

He placed the soup on the beside table before pulling her into his arms, holding her while she cried for the inevitable loss of their baby. Both of them knew there was no saving their baby and it killed them. He cupped her cheek and kissed her forehead "you didn't fail me darling"

"yes I did, my body is supposed to be made to carry your child yet here I am, about to lose our baby because I..." she cried out.

He wiped every one of the tears that rolled down her rosy cheeks "listen to me sweetheart, I know this hurts because I'm hurting too, but we will get through this together. I love you too damn much to let you go through this alone, I'm right here, and I want you to know you didn't fail me. We have time and we can start a little family whenever you are ready, the timing just wasn't right for us."

She looked up at him with pleading eyes "do we have to go back to New York?"

"Do you want to stay here?" he asked, he thought she was excited to go home.

She nodded "just for a little while more, I want to recover here... If I go back I'll throw myself into work and neglect you because I'm hurting, I know myself Trevor, and I don't want that for us. I just need some time to get things straight in my mind."

He gave her a gentle kiss "I understand, we can speak to Price and Burns and stay her for a few more months. Maybe go back sometime in next year. Is that okay with you?"

She wrapped her arms around his neck "thank you"

He rubbed her back in the most soothing way possible "you never have to thank me, I would do anything to keep you safe, healthy and happy. I know this is going to be difficult but we have to be strong"

...

Olivia's surgery was scheduled for two days after her appointment, she was currently sitting in the hospital room, waiting for them to wheel her out for surgery. She looked up at Casey and Trevor who sat in the room with her, both of them talking about anything and everything to keep her mind off the surgery she was about to have.

A nurse walked into the room and offered every one of them a small smile "Mrs Connor are you ready to go in?"

Olivia nodded, letting out a breath, Trevor and her had already said their goodbyes to their baby and even though it hurt so damn much, they agreed to be each other's strength. They were going to get through all of this and they knew no matter what, they would be okay eventually. Trevor walked over to her and cupped her cheek "you're going to be just fine"

"I know" she whispered, her hands on his chest.

He leaned in and gave her a soft kiss, filling it with every bit of love he felt for her. He broke their kiss way too soon for either of their liking, and smiled down at her, gently stroking her cheek "I will be right here when you get out. I love you"

"I love you too" she whispered back, before letting him go.

She was wheeled out of the private room, leaving Casey and Trevor to sit and wait. Eva walked up to the private room and sighed when she saw Trevor sitting with tears in his eyes and Casey crying for her best friend's loss.

"I was hoping that I could speak to her before she went in, clear up the mess I made" she whispered.

Trevor sighed "she'll be out eventually, but she might not be awake."

Eva sat down beside Casey "thank you both for letting me know... How is she doing?"

"She's terrified and heartbroken, she just found out that she is carrying a baby and suddenly life is taking it away from them." Casey said with a sigh.

Trevor ran his hand through his hair "excuse me ladies, I need to call someone."

Eva watched him walk out and turned to Casey "how is he holding up?"

"Trevor doesn't really talk about things, he is obviously hurt and he is allowing himself to grieve, but he is also trying to be strong for Olivia. I just hope everything goes well with the surgery"

"What happened? I thought she wasn't pregnant, the tests were negative." Eva asked, still confused as to how things got this bad all of a sudden.

"The tests were all false negatives, and that is usually rare and we'll never know why it happened. When they did an ultrasound, they found out that it was an ectopic pregnancy, the embryo was in the fallopian tube so they have to remove the embryo. If they don't remove it, she could die. It's life threatening."

"That's horrible, how long will the surgery be?"

"about an hour"

Trevor walked back into the room and sat down, he turned to Casey "they are calling the squad and my family in today, they want to explain everything to them."

"The Marshals?" Casey asked, he nodded.

"do they know about Olivia?" Eva pipped up.

"I just informed them, they will tell everyone what they need to know."

...

**Marshal Offices, New York**

The squad along with Trevor's family all met up at the Marshals Offices, neither of them aware of what exactly was going on. They settled down and watched as two US Marshals walked into the room, every set of eyes trained on them.

"So are you two going to tell us what this is about or are we going to sit here all day staring at each other?" Elliot Stabler asked, already irritated at seeing the family of the man his partner got murdered with.

Burns scowled over at Elliot "I know you are impatient to know what is going on, and we will explain everything shortly but we want this to go down as peacefully as possible."

Cragen frowned "you're making me worry now. What is this about?"

"Olivia Benson and Trevor Langan" Price pipped up, watching the different expressions covering every one of their faces.

Trevor's mother shook her head "losing them was painful enough, shouldn't we leave them to rest in peace instead of digging into their lives?" she asked with tears shining in her eyes.

"That is why you are all here. Olivia and Trevor are alive, unfortunately they were forced away from home without further contact for their protection and all of yours. We caught the guys that were after them and both of them are now safe to return." Price said before giving them each a file with Olivia and Trevor's new identities. He also explained to them why they had to go so far out and that they were supposed to return in a few days time.

Elliot scowled at the two men "so we just have to take your word for this. Can you two prove that they are alive?"

Fin scoffed at Elliot "could you stop being an ass Stabler, we just found out that they are both alive and we should be thankful for that."

Alex nodded "Fin has a point. We have all been spiriling downwards ever since both of their funerals, because we missed two vital people in our lives. I am so happy that my best friend is alive, I have been crying myself to sleep for the past five months and now we have hope that our girl is coming back." she said with tears in her eyes.

Burns sighed "Actually that is the other thing... They were supposed to come back in a few days but Trevor called about an hour ago to inform us on their choice to stay awhile. We don't know why they changed their minds on coming home but we do know that Olivia may be a bit sick."

Thomas, Trevor's brother, looked up and sighed "is there any way you can contact them now, while we are all together just to ask them why they won't be coming home?"

Price nodded "we can facetime Trevor if you all want us to"

Elliot narrowed his eyes at the Marshal "why can't you facetime Liv?"

"Trevor will explain everything" he said before dialing Trevor's number.

Everybody looked up at the massive screen in the front of the room and gasped when they saw the familiar face of Trevor Langan popping up on the screen. Price allowed a small smile to cover his lips when he saw Trevor's mothers face, she wiped the tears that rolled down her cheeks and smiled "Trevie you're alive... I missed you so much my boy, the thought of never seeing you again... "

He smiled, fighting back his own tears at the sight of everybody "yes I am alive mom, I missed you so much too."

Thomas felt his tears drop from his eyes "hey Trev... It's been a while since I've seen you, I'm sorry for walking out on you and mom all those years ago"

"Thomas let's not dwell on the past, you are here now, you and mom are on good terms and that is all that matters. As for me, I have no issue with you."

Trevor's business partner who had been sitting silently the whole time, smirked up at the sight of his younger partner "Langan, it's good to see you again... I just have one little issue, after you died I transferred the company into your name, I need you to sign my shares back you asshole, you set me up."

Trevor laughed at the older man "Henshall I did nothing of the sort, you made that decision on your own... Plus we've got a lot of business to discuss when I return."

Fin smirked "hey Langan, where's Liv?"

Every one of them saw the look of sadness that washed over his face at the mention of her name, he turned to look at someone behind him and nodded before walking over to the hospital bed where Olivia was sleeping in, they brought her back into the room before Price called and she was still out of it.

He sighed "She's a bit out of it but she's right here" he turned the phone to her so that they could all see her sleeping form.

"Why is she in hospital, what happened to her?" Munch asked, a look of concern etched onto his face.

Trevor scratched the back of his neck nervously, he wasn't sure if he should tell them yet or wait until Olivia woke up. He decided that he would much rather wake her and have her speak to the squad herself, he knew she missed them and she would want to speak to them.

"I'll try to wake her up, just give me a minute" he gently nudged her shoulder "Olivia, wake up"

She stirred after a few minutes letting out a groan, she let out a soft moan, feeling the pain of the incision they made. Her eyes focused on him after a few minutes and she forced a smile "did they do it?"

He nodded "yes they did, how are you feeling?"

"like a piece of me is missing" she whispered.

He gave her a sweet smile "there's a few people who would like to say hi to you"

She looked up at the phone and gasped, tears instantly filling her brown eyes "hey guys" she whispered.

All of them simply stared at her in shock. Cragen was the first to speak, his voice breaking and his tears falling freely "it is so good to hear your voice again Liv, to see you alive. I missed you"

She let out a soft sob, feeling Trevor stroke her arm gently, she knew the group couldn't see him comforting her and she was somewhat thankful for that "it's good to see you all too. I missed you guys so much, how are you all?"

"it's not the same without you here, seeing your empty desk everyday was the most painful thing ever. When are you coming back Liv?" Fin asked.

She bit her lip "not anytime soon. I just got out of surgery and I want to recover first, I want to be healthy enough to come back to work and be at full speed again. Plus it's really peaceful here, a great place to heal."

"Why did you have a surgery?" Alex asked, wiping the tears that fell from her eyes.

Olivia pursed her lips for a moment, she didn't want them to know and she didn't want to speak about what had happened "I fell and had some internal injuries, it's nothing major but they had to fix it up." she looked at Trevor who was giving her a confused look "how long did the doctor say that I'll need to recover?"

He thought for a moment before turning to Casey who stood out of sight of the camera and showed him seven fingers "six to seven months for it all to heal completely. So we will be returning home in next year"

Both of them felt horrible for lying but they didn't really want to explain everything over the phone, not after losing their baby. Olivia forced a smile before groaning, she was in a lot of pain and desperately wanted the doctors to give her something.

Elliot wiped his tears and looked at his partner "I'm sorry Liv"

She gave him a small smile "El it's okay, I know we had our words before all of this happened, but you'll always be my partner. I missed you"

"I missed you too Liv, I felt like I lost my best friend when they told us you died, I felt like a piece of me died." he said through his tears.

Olivia let out a breath "how is Kathy and the kids doing?"

He shrugged "they are good, Kathy is happy as can be... We just found out she is pregnant, so baby number four is on the way."

Trevor gave Olivia's hand a comforting squeeze as her eyes filled with tears. She nodded, biting her lip and willing her tears not to fall from her eyes "that's great, how far along is she?"

"Three months" he said.

Olivia felt her lower lip begin to shiver, she was three months pregnant too and now all she had left was an incision and stitches. She looked away from the phone and let out a sob before looking up at Trevor.

Trevor no longer cared what any of them would think and reached up to cup her cheek, wiping the tears that fell from her eyes "do you want me to call a nurse?"

She nodded, sobbing at the loss of their precious little baby, she knew this was going to be difficult but she didn't expect to feel so empty.

Munch frowned at the sight of her crying, it wasn't something she did infront of them ever, she never allowed herself to show pain in front of them "Liv are you okay?"

"it's just painful" she whispered, knowing that they did not truly understand the depth of her words. They didn't understand that she felt a pain that no medication could heal, that had been worsened by the words of her partner. The pain of losing her unborn child clawed at her heart, and hearing that Kathy was going have her fourth child ripped her apart.

She wondered, what had she done to deserve this, what had her baby done to deserve this. The little bit of happiness that came with the thought of being pregnant was ripped out of her hands in an instant, and she felt cheated out of happiness yet again. She saw the worried stares of her coworkers and whispered a quick goodbye before hanging up and bursting into loud heart wrenching sobs.

Eva, who had been standing quietly in the room, rushed off to call Trevor, knowing that Olivia needed him right now. Casey tried to comfort her friend as best as she could, knowing that Elliot had unintentionally just added salt to her wounds.

Trevor rushed into the room and moved to her side, holding her shaking form as close to him as possible "baby please calm down. I know this hurts but you need to calm just a little bit."

She looked up at him with tears pouring out of her now swollen eyes at a rapid speed "why can she have her fourth baby and we had to lose ours? We didn't do anything to deserve this, why did our baby have to die like this?"

He kissed her forehead, gently stroking his hand down her arms "I don't know why this happened baby, I really don't know. I wish I could make you feel better and take all this pain away, but we will have our family eventually"

She moved over, letting out a soft groan "will you lay with me?"

He moved into her bed and wrapped his arms around her, making sure she was comfortable in his arms. He brushed her hair out of her face and placed gentle kisses on the top of her head "we will get through this Liv, and when the time is right we can head back home and hopefully start a little family if you'd like"

She looked up at him "do you really want to start a family with me? Haven't I hurt you enough? I lost your baby"

He gave her a loving smile "yes I want a family with you, because you are the love of my life. You did not mean for any of this to happen, it was not your fault. Now you and I are going to work to get through this and we are going to recover together."

She nodded "we can do that"

"Yes we can darling" he whispered before giving her a passionate kiss. He cupped her cheek and eased out of their kiss after a few minutes "you are amazing and so strong to go through all of this and still keep fighting."

Casey and Eva smiled over at the couple who had forgotten they were had company, Eva took Casey's hand and pulled her into the hallway "I think we should come back later, let them get some rest..."

"that's a great idea, thank you for being here for her today" Casey whispered.

"she's my best friend and I was nothing but a bitch to her, so I wanted to be sure she is okay. I care about her, and now seeing them together and speaking to their family, I could see that they weren't acting these past five months. They are amazing people, no matter their real names... They are still the perfect, supportive couple I knew and I needed to see that. Now I just hope Olivia makes a speedy recovery."


	17. Chapter 17

**A Little More Official. **

Olivia had been in hospital for three weeks before she was allowed to go home, and she was more than ready to be away from the poking and prodding of the doctors. She smiled as Trevor helped her into the passenger seat of the car "thank you"

He closed the door before running over to the other side of the car and getting in "there's no need to thank me Liv... How are you feeling?"

"okay I guess..." she shrugged.

He gave her a tight lipped smile "so the girls are planning a little welcome home party for you, it won't be today because they wanted to give you time to settle in first."

She nodded "sounds fun"

He sighed, knowing that she wasn't going to just become her usual bubbly self again. He knew this was going to take time and he knew she was building up her internal walls again, she had distanced herself from him after the surgery and that distance still lingered after three weeks. He knew she was going to push him away, he saw it coming but he had no idea how he was going to get her to allow him back in.

The rest of the drive was silent, Olivia's eyes were fixed on the streets they were passing through while silent tears rolled down her cheeks. Her hands were gently pressed to her stomach, the pain of losing their baby still had it's grip on her and she wondered if she would ever recover.

She was a bit startled when she felt his hand on her shoulder, immediately flinching away from his touch. Trevor dropped his hand away from her "we're home"

Olivia had never expected those words to come the lips of Trevor Langan, if you had told her that this would be her life a few years ago, she would have called you crazy. Yet here she was going home with Trevor Langan.

He helped her out of the car and led her into their bedroom, smiling as he sat down beside her "are you happy to be out of the hospital at least?"

"yes, I was going insane in there. I'm sure it's going to feel like heaven when I sleep on a proper bed again" she said with a small smile.

He nodded "yeah and I can not wait to be able to hold you tonight without doctors and nurses popping in every few minutes."

She scratched the back of her head almost nervously, before looking up at him "about that... I want some space, don't take it the wrong way, but I want to sleep on my own for a bit..."

Trevor was surprised but he couldn't say that he didn't see this coming. He nodded, swallowing the lump that arose in his throat, he feared that this was the beginning of the end for them. He stood to his feet and gave her a tight lipped smile "no problem... I'm going to prepare something to eat, are you hungry?"

She shook her head "no thank you, I just want to freshen up a bit, take a shower and get a bit of rest."

"Okay, call me if you need anything" he whispered, not sure if he could kiss her or not.

Olivia nodded, watching him walk out of the room with a disappointed look on his face. She knew he was hurting too and she felt guilty because of that, she figured that he would be better off with someone else, someone who could actually give him the baby he was so excited for. She bit back the sob that threatened to leave her lips before reaching for her phone that was ringing.

"Hey Alex" she forced a smile as her friend's face popped up on the screen.

Alex studied her best friend's face, noticing that her eyes were filled with tears "hey Liv, how are you? Trevor said that you're being discharged today."

"Yeah I'm home, we got here a few minutes ago. I'm okay, just a bit of a dull throb here and there" she said, wiping the tear that made an escape from her eye.

"I hope you get well soon, I hate seeing you in pain like this. So how is it there? What's it like staying with Trevor Langan?" she asked with a smirk.

Olivia shrugged "it's peaceful here, very quiet. We stay about 20 minutes from the city, and we've got lovely neighbours."

Alex nodded before narrowing her eyes at her friend "you didn't answer my question about living with Langan"

She sighed "it's okay. He doesn't disturb me much, he's there if I need anything, and he is a great chef."

"You're telling me that you two have been living together for almost six months and you haven't done anything yet?"

She pursed her lips, not sure if she should tell Alex or not. She wanted to speak about what happened but she didn't want to have her friend's pitying her "We may have kissed once or twice but that's about it. Nothing serious, we are just enjoying our time away, or atleast we were until I got hurt."

"Well on the upside you have someone to take care of you" Alex said, watching Olivia purse her lips. She shook her head "Liv you better not push that man away if he's trying to help you. I know you well enough to know that you're going to try to do everything on your own. Let him help you"

She rolled her eyes "I'm not an invalid Al"

"I didn't say you are. You are a gorgeous woman, with needs, if he can help you with those needs, let him. You need to have sex, I can see your frustration through the phone" she teased.

Olivia sighed "I have to go now, it was lovely speaking to you. I'll call you tomorrow"

"Okay darling, hope you feel better soon. Bye" she said, blowing a kiss before hanging up.

Olivia sat back and let out a breath, she hated the way she felt, she was torn. Her mind was running a mile a minute, wondering if she should go out and tell Trevor what she really felt or if she should push him away because she hurt him.

She shook her head, a weak attempt at silencing her thoughts, before going into the bathroom for a much needed shower. She stepped under the spray of water and allowed it to relax her tensed muscles, her eyes were closed and the only thing on her mind was the tall defense attorney in the other room. She wondered, could he still love her after everything that happened recently.

...

Trevor sat down on the sofa and rolled his eyes when he saw Casey's last text to him, she had asked him how Olivia was holding up and he explained everything and her response was that he should just be patient. He was irritated to say the least, he was being patient, he didn't push her and even accepted the fact that she pushed him away. He knew she was hurting and that was the reason behind her sudden change in behaviour.

After spending the entire day not knowing what to do with himself, he went into the spare bedroom to take a nap, he was exhausted and figured that when he woke up he would be ready to take on whatever was thrown his way. Olivia hadn't come out of the main bedroom the entire day, she stayed locked away from him. He laid down in the bed that he hadn't slept in for over three months, this was his bedroom when they moved here but after they started dating they shared a bed. It felt foreign for him to sleep without her in his arms, to not feel her curvaceous body cuddled up to his muscular form.

_So you got used to having her in your arms and now you can't sleep without her. Dumbass._

He rolled his eyes at his thoughts, but they were damn right. He couldn't do it, Trevor Langan could not fall asleep without Olivia in his arms. It was a terrifying thought because he realised just how far he had allowed himself to fall for her, just how attached he got.

"hey" came the soft voice from the doorway

He looked up at her and smiled "hey, is everything okay?"

She shook her head, before walking over to the bed and sitting down on the opposite side. Her back was facing toward him and he couldn't see the tears that filled her eyes "I just... I can't sleep without you, I know it sounds stupid but I felt really alone. Will you..."

"It doesn't sound stupid at all, because I have been having the same problem. Lay with me?" he asked gently.

She moved over, cuddling into his embrace, his arms wrapped around her waist as he spooned her from behind "I'm sorry for pushing you away earlier. I thought it would be easier but instead I spent the entire day crying alone in my bedroom"

He kissed her exposed shoulder "tell me what is bothering you, I'm here for you Olivia, we are in this together."

She turned over gently, letting out a groan, and gave him a tight lipped smile "I know it may seem like I'm being dramatic, but as soon as I thought about being pregnant I was excited. I was nervous yes, but I was looking forward to having a baby, carrying a child, our child, for nine months and then getting to see his or her little face. The thought of being a mother felt like a reality for the first time in my life and I didn't have that little voice telling me that my biological clock is ticking away."

She sniffled lightly "and then life just took it away from me, from us. Just like that suddenly I'm not pregnant and what would have been our baby was ripped out of me. I felt like I failed our baby Trevor, that we lost our last chance, the only chance we had. I love you and I'm terrified that one day down the line you will realise that you could have had your own little family but I ruined it."

He cupped her cheek and wiped away the tears that stained them "I love you Olivia, and I know that you must have heard those words before from people that didn't mean it, but I need you to believe me when I say it. I am not going to walk out on you because of something you and I had no control over, I need you to understand that I am not walking out on you. We still have time, and maybe now we can do things differently."

"What do you mean?" she asked.

He took hold of her hand and kissed her knuckles "you will have to wait and see"

She smiled up at him before leaning in and giving him a deep kiss, which he responded to instantly. He broke their kiss when air was needed and caressed her cheek, admiring her beauty. He smiled down at her "you take my breath away Olivia, you really do."

She smirked up at him before pulling him down for another passionate kiss, and that is how they stayed for some time. Both of them exploring each others mouths and allowing their hands to do a bit of traveling. Sex was out of the picture for atleast another week, Olivia was given strict orders that she had to wait atleast a month before having sex, and even then he wasn't allowed to ejaculate inside of her for atleast another month. She was a bit pissed because in the back of her mind she knew that would mean she'd have to wait a long time to fall pregnant again, hell if it ever happened again.

But for now they were simply enjoying their time alone, kissing and touching was the most they could do and that was okay for now. Trevor pulled away and let out a soft chuckle "why do I get the feeling this is going to be a long week?"

She groaned beneath him "because it is going to be a long week. I'm already going insane, because I want to feel you."

He cupped her cheek "soon darling."

...

A week had passed before the girls threw their little party, all of them dressed in beautiful dresses and looking perfect. They decided to keep the party at Casey's place, it was better that way because Olivia didn't want people going through the things in her place, somebody could easily find out that it was a whole cover up. They had decided to keep their actual identities to themselves, getting Casey and Eva to agree not to say a word.

The party was banging and there was quite a few people around. Olivia stood in the kitchen snacking on a bowl of crisps, she looked over at Casey and raised a brow at her "why is here so many people?"

"because it won't be a party with only a few people. You look a lot better now" Casey said, handing her a glass of juice since she couldn't drink wine due to her meds.

Eva walked up to the girls with a scowl on her face "Juls just a warning Aiden is coming over to speak to you."

"okay" she said with a frown.

He walked up to her and gave her a small smile "Hey Julia, it's good to have you back... Eva told me you were sick in hospital, I was worried about you."

She shrugged "it's good to be back I guess, I hate hospitals."

He chuckled "well we have that in common. How are you feeling?"

She followed him to a nearby table and sat down opposite him "I am a lot better now... Cas and Eva have been amazing and Mike, well he is just too good to be true."

Aiden pursed his lips before nodding "I wanted to apologise to you, for spiking your drink the last time we hung out. I'm really sorry, I didn't even realise how wrong it was until a few days ago, a friend of mine has a little sister and she was spiked and raped."

She gasped "how old is she?"

"she's sixteen, and we didn't ever think that would happen to her but after it did, I realised how wrong I was. I'm so sorry Julia."

"It's okay. That's in the past, but uhm... Did you get your friend's sister to a hospital or let her speak to someone?"

"No she said she wanted to be alone, she's staying with my parents since Sandy's parents aren't in the country at the moment. Do we need to get her to hospital?" he asked.

She nodded "look she went through something traumatic and it would really benefit her if she spoke about it instead of brushing it under the carpet. I have seen people's lives get ruined because of past traumas that they never dealt with."

"But who do I get her to talk to?" he asked, genuinely concerned.

"you can bring her to my place tomorrow afternoon, I can speak to her. I know a thing or two about how to get someone to open up and how to help victims of sexual abuse." she said with a smile.

He nodded "are you sure, Mike won't mind me bringing her to you guys?"

"I'll speak to him about it but I'm sure it won't be a problem. You can sit in while I speak to her if you'd like."

"that would be great although Sandy would have to join us, but anyways I gotta get going. I promised them that I would pick them up tonight, we are having a movie night. Again I'm so sorry for what I tried to do." he said, standing up and smiling down at her.

She stood up and placed her hand on his arm, giving it a reassuring squeeze "It's fine Aiden. Have fun with Sandy and her sister tonight."

"thanks, enjoy your party. I'll see you tomorrow" he said before walking out.

She let out a breath and ran her hand through her hair before going into the living room where Trevor stood talking to Jenna with a beer in his hand. She walked up to him and slipped her arm around his waist "can I steal him for a minute?"

Jenna shrugged "I doubt me saying no is going to stop you"

She chuckled "you're right about that."

Trevor followed Olivia away from the crowd and raised a brow at her "if I didn't know any better, I'd say you were trying to get me all to yourself."

"I am" she whispered, leaning up to kiss him.

He smiled against her lips "dance with me"

She broke their kiss and let out a chuckle "why?"

"because I want to dance with my wife infront of all of these people. Gotta let the guys know you're taken." he said, kissing her again.

She cupped his cheek "or we can get out of here and you can get me all to yourself. I need some tlc"

"That depends on what you will let me do" he whispered.

She smirked "maybe it's about what I want to do to you. I wanna taste you."

"You're a bad woman" he groaned.

She kissed him again, holding onto the lapels of his shirt "I am just taking care of my man."

"Let's go, I want to show you something" he said taking hold of her hand and sneaking out of the house.

They laughed as they made their way back to their place, she locked the door behind them and giggled when he pulled her up to the main bedroom. He stopped, placing a finger against her lips "close your eyes, I have a surprise for you."

She did as he asked of her and listened as he shuffled around the room, she let out a giggle "Trevor what are you up to?"

"Just trust me" he said taking hold of her hand "keep your eyes closed" he whispered, leading her to their bed.

He helped her sit down at the foot of the bed, before kneeling infront of her, he took hold of her hand and smiled "open your eyes"

Her eyes fluttered open and she gasped as she watched him place a little egg shaped blue box in her hand. Her eyes welled up with tears and she looked down at him "Trev, is this?"

He nodded "yeah... I figured uhm, well we have been speaking and all this talk about a future keeps coming up. I don't want us to be just another couple, and I have been thinking about this for a while now. About making things a bit more official. I love you Olivia and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me?"

She wiped the tears that rolled down her cheeks "are you sure you want to marry me?"

He nodded "more sure than I have been of anything in my life."

"Yes." she whispered, kneeling down so that they were face to face, she nodded "yes I'll marry you"

...

**_A/N:_**

**_Hey y'all_**

**_I know things seem a bit messed up, it was really difficult to write this chapter but alas, here it is._**

**_I know it's not my best work, but it's just a bit of a filler. Things will pick up in the next few chapters and we will be hearing a bit more from the squad._**

**_It may seem like things are rushing but it will all make sense soon, Nevertheless I hope y'all enjoyed this chapter._**

**_Reviews are appreciated._**

**_I love y'all._**

**_-Karrrm️._**


	18. Chapter 18

**Torn.**

Olivia rolled over and allowed a massive smile to cover her face when she saw him smiling down at her, she cupped his cheek, looking at her diamond engagement ring that sat next to what was known as Julia's wedding band. She let out a soft giggle "how long have you been awake?"

"A few minutes for the most, you looked so peaceful, I didn't have the heart to wake you up." he said before leaning down to give her a chaste kiss.

She smiled when their lips parted "you have no idea how happy you make me."

"You make me even happier." he said before leaning down and kissing her again, this time more passionately.

She cupped his cheek, deepening their kiss, a soft moan fell from her lips when she felt his hands caressing her skin. He ran his fingers across the silky skin of her thigh, moving to the center. She broke their kiss and let out a soft pant when his fingers ran up her soaked slit, her legs widened instinctively, giving the space to do more. She bit her lip when she felt him slide two thick digits into her, his lips moving to her neck.

She dug her nails into his back, her eyes shut and pants escaping her everytime he moved his fingers. She took hold of his wrist and let out a shaky breath "Trevor... I need you, no more teasing or waiting."

He nodded, aligning himself with her heated core. Both of them groaned as he pushed into her, her eyes fluttering closed. She wrapped her arm around the back of his neck, pulling him in for a passion filled kiss.

Olivia broke their kiss when she heard the doorbell ring out in their otherwise silent home. She let out a groan before looking over at the clock, rolling her eyes when she saw the time "it's 7a.m, what could Casey and Eva want this early?"

"Relax they probably want to know why we snuck out last night, we didn't exactly say goodbye." he said before getting up "I'll go see what they want and you stay right here. I will be back to continue what we started"

She smirked "I'll be waiting"

He grabbed a pair of boxer briefs and slipped into it, then grabbed a sweatpants and a t-shirt before rushing out of the bedroom, he just wanted to tell the girls they were fine and rush back to ravish his gorgeous fiancee. He walked over to the door and opened it with a smirk, stopping as soon as he saw who stood infront of him. He had to fight back the gasp that threatened to leave his throat "Alex, Elliot. What are you two doing here?"

Alex shrugged "look we aren't exactly travel buddies, but we had to check on our girl. The Marshals gave us your address and they warned us about the pictures and marriage crap."

Trevor stepped aside "well come in, make yourselves at home... I'll go call Olivia"

Elliot nodded, looking around at the livingroom, he took their wedding photo and showed it to Alex "if I didn't know any better I would believe this too. It all looks real."

She took hold of the picture and smirked "they look cute together..."

"Just a pity lover boy isn't Liv's type" he said with a scoff.

Trevor cussed under his breath as he walked into their bedroom, he closed the door behind him and let out a sigh "you won't believe who came to see you"

"Who?" she asked, sitting up and covering her nakedness with the silky sheets.

"Alex and Elliot" he said with a groan, he pointed to the closed door as if they were there "they are in the living room, waiting for me to get you."

She shook her head "no, no this can't be happening, not now. I can't go out there Trev, I don't want to see... Elliot." she whispered.

"What do you want me to do? I can't exactly chase them out, they flew all the way to see you" he said, sitting down at the foot of the bed.

She let out a groan "just tell them that I don't want to see anybody... Trevor I really can't face him right now, I just, I have to think. I can't do it"

He looked at her tear filled eyes and moved over to her "hey, I thought you missed them and wanted to see them. What's wrong?"

She looked up at him and sighed "the last time Elliot and I spoke, we had an argument about you... He thought that I was going out on a date with you, and it ripped at the edges of our partnership, our friendship. I don't want to have to go out there and tell him that I'm engaged and I just lost our baby, not yet atleast. I wanted time Trevor, that's why I said I don't want to go home, I needed time to get my mind straight."

He cupped her cheek "listen to me for a second, I know this is nerve wrecking but it will be better if we get it over with early on. I don't want to come between you and Elliot but I won't deny what we have just to please him either."

"You don't understand... I told him that I love him, and then I left, and then I-I hooked up with you. I feel like a whore, he said he'd leave his wife for me and I was crazy enough to believe it for a second. Then you came along and you made me realise that I could never be the other woman, not when you showed me all that love, I don't love Elliot, I thought I did, but it took truly falling in love, for me to realise that I was just blown away by the thought of having someone in my life for longer than just a few dates. I don't know how to go out there and tell him all of that, not when I know what he came here for."

He dropped his hand from her cheek and swallowed the lump in his throat "did you two ever?"

She shook her head "baby no. I would never, he was, is married. I swear it only went as far as a kiss, nothing more."

"What do you want me to tell them?" he asked.

She shrugged "it's fine, I can't avoid them forever..."

She got dressed quickly and walked into the livingroom, stopping when she came face to face with them. She offered both of them a small, tight lipped smile "hey guys"

Alex walked over to her and pulled her in for a hug, tears brimming her eyes "I missed you so much."

Olivia cupped Alex's cheeks when she finally let go of her and smiled through her own tears "I missed you too Alex... It feels like I haven't seen you in years."

"I can't believe you are actually here, you're alive" she said, her tears falling freely.

"You are not getting rid of me that easily" she said with a chuckle.

Alex wiped her tears and sniffled softly "what is Trevor feeding you? You gained a bit of weight."

Olivia pursed her lips "too much Italian" she joked, knowing full well that she had started to put on baby weight a few days before they found out about their little one.

Trevor saw the unshed tears in her eyes and knew exactly where her mind went, their baby. He gave her a small smile before turning to Elliot who stood awkwardly one side "hey I was given orders to take care of you and that's what I did."

"I know dar-" she stopped herself just in time and smirked "dumbass"

Trevor let out a soft breath of relief "do you guys want anything?"

Elliot shrugged "you two got any beers?"

He nodded "sure do, Alex do you want anything to drink?"

"A beer will do. I'm not the beer type but I just hugged my best friend who was supposedly dead for five and a half months... So yeah a beer will do." Alex said through her tears.

"give her a few beers, she needs it" Olivia teased.

He smirked "and would you like anything?"

"I'm good for now..." she whispered.

Trevor nodded before heading to the kitchen, giving them some privacy. Olivia watched him walk into of the kitchen and let out a breath, she wanted nothing more than to cuddle up with him right now and forget about the world. She knew all of this would catch up to her and there was no way to avoid it now, she had to face him.

Elliot stepped forward and pulled her into his arms, holding her firmly, yet gently against his body. He was so caught up in actually seeing her alive in person that he couldn't speak, instead he just held her and ran his fingers through her hair.

"I missed you" she whispered through her tears.

Trevor came out of the kitchen and stopped when he saw her in Elliot's arms, he swallowed the lump in his throat and forced himself not too think too deeply about it.

_It's just a hug. Between two work partners and friends who missed each other. _

His thoughts reassured him somewhat, but he still could not help feeling the fear of possibly losing her.

Alex noticed the emotionless look on Trevor's face and cleared her throat, forcing Trevor out of his trance. She watched him blink a few times before handing her the beer and disappearing up the stairs, without saying a single word.

Elliot raised Olivia's face and cupped both her cheeks, tears glistening in his eyes as he leaned in toward her.

She gently placed her finger against his lips, stopping him instantly "we can't do this." she whispered quickly, afraid that her voice was about to betray her

"What? Why not?" he asked, confused by her sudden retraction from his embrace "I love you Liv."

She let out a breath "Elliot please... You just got here, let's not make things difficult already. Your wife is at home and pregnant, trusting you to be faithful to her. I'm not going to be that woman."

Alex quietly walked into the kitchen, giving them some privacy. She opened her phone and sent Trevor a text, knowing that he didn't look too pleased with Olivia and Elliot's moment.

_Alex Cabot: hey, you okay?_

_Trevor: I'm good, just a bit tired. I'm going to catch a nap while you three catch up. _

She sighed, it was obvious that he was lying but she didn't know why. Nothing was making sense to her, she knew that Olivia had a thing for Elliot so she couldn't understand why she turned him down.

Olivia let out a breath, running a hand through her hair "I'm sorry El"

He nodded, a sigh leaving his lips "what changed?"

"Everything" she whispered.

Elliot watched as she sniffled lightly before looking around "what's wrong Liv?"

She felt her tears at the brim of her eyes, knowing that they would fall if she stayed any longer. She blinked a few times, an attempt to clear her vision "I can't do this right now. I'm sorry"

She turned away from him and made her way up the stairs, into her bedroom. She shut the door and leaned up against it, letting out a breath of relief, she made it out of there without crying or anything. Now that she was alone, the walls broke down and her tears came flooding out of her eyes.

She sat down with her back against the door and cried quietly, wondering how she was going to get her life back on track, why she felt so utterly torn when she knew there was only one choice to make in her life at the moment. It was either she chose Elliot who she loved deeply once upon a time and who leave his entire family behind for her, or she chose Trevor, who taught her how to love again, and made her feel like the most amazing and beautiful human being. Who would do anything for her and go anywhere with her, who's baby she carried, even if it was only for three months.

"Liv get up from the ground and lay down for a bit, you're going to make yourself sick."

She looked up at the sound of his voice and forced a smile when she saw Trevor sitting on his side of the bed with a tear stained face. She was so caught up in her emotions that she did not even see him when she came in.

"you can lay down for a bit, I'll give you some space" he said, standing up and walking over to her.

She took hold of his outstretched hand and looked up at him "I'm sorry Trevor."

"You want him don't you?" he whispered, his own tears dropping from his eyes again.

"no... I don't know, I need to think."

He shook his head "thinking is not what you need right now. You don't need to sort your mind out, it's your heart that's in this mess, because that's where all of this is stemming from. You need to figure out who it is that you really love and want to be with, and even if it hurts me. I will support and respect your decision"

She cupped his cheek, wiping the tears that made their way down "I don't want to hurt anybody"

"that's not an option babe. Elliot came back here to reclaim you and I'm trying to keep you with me... But in the end its all up you, you decide who you want."

"a few seconds ago you and I were in bed and making love and now I have to choose between you and my best friend, my partner, the only person I could turn to for years... It doesn't seem fair on both of you, or me."

He nodded, giving her a small smile "nothing in life is fair darling." he said before walking out of her bedroom and leaving her torn between the two men she never thought she'd have to choose between.

...

**_A/N_**

**_Hey y'all._**

**_I know it's been forever since I updated and I will try my best not to leave you guys hanging for so long again. I had terrible writers block and was so uninspired to write that I almost ended up deleting this entire book._**

**_This chapter is a bit messy, and not my best work because I forced myself to write it._** **_So I apologise if it sucks._**

**_Let me know what y'all think about it._**

**_-Karrrm._**


	19. Chapter 19

**Piece By Piece.**

Olivia sat down on her side of the massive bed and let out a soft sob, her life was in shambles. First she lost her family and her friends, then she lost the place she called home, then she lost her baby, and now she had to decide what she would lose next. She knew she loved both of them but figuring at what to do was so much more difficult than it seemed to be.

Alex walked into the bedroom and sat down on the opposite side of the bed, tapping the space beside her "lay down. We need to talk."

Olivia did what Alex ordered and let out a breath, wiping her tears "I'm not really in the talking mood."

"I don't care. I can see that you are hurting really bad right now and I'm going to find a way to help you."

She scoffed "you don't even know the half of what is happening"

"I do know that you have a choice to make, I also know that you are struggling because you feel deeply for both of them. I just have a few questions... Firstly, do you really love Elliot?"

"I used to"

"that's not an answer, it's either yes or no." she said, reaching over and wiping her friends tears.

She pursed her lips "I do love him. Not as much as I did in the past but yes, some of that love is still there."

Alex nodded "and do you love Trevor, like really love him?"

She closed her eyes and let out a breath "yes. I really love him. He makes me feel safe and happy and so many other good emotions that I can't put into words. I don't know how I would have made it through these past few months without him, hell, I don't even know how I would make it to go a day without him now."

A smirk pulled at her lips "does Elliot make you feel all of those things?"

"no." she sat up and placed her hand onto her stomach "I know what Trevor and I have is special, I know it's not like any other relationship I have ever had before. I know that he is just perfect for me... I know that he's the one that I'm going to choose, I just don't want to hurt Elliot. He is my friend, and my partner."

Alex sat up beside her "Well by holding off, you are hurting Elliot AND Trevor... Both of them stormed out of here in tears, both looking hurt. So it will be easier if you put an end to the pain sooner rather than later."

"What if I lose Elliot again, and he doesn't speak to me?" she whispered.

Alex took hold of her hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze "you have been without him for the last six months. Without speaking to him or seeing him and you were happy, he was happy too. Even if it took some time, both of you healed and moved forward. If he decides not to speak to you again, which I'm sure he won't, you will be okay."

"You're right... Plus Trevor has been my rock for a whole while now, he takes care of me, makes sure I'm happy and safe. He is amazing, and these last few weeks have been challenging but he has been keeping up with every blow life gave us and somehow he managed to make me smile again after everything." her smile returned to her lips as she spoke.

"The man really loves you, I mean he stayed with you when you were in hospital, ran as soon as you called for him, and even put up with all your mood swings. Those are things that most men won't do for someone who is just a girlfriend to them."

Olivia bit her lip, her eyes averting to her bedside drawer, she gulped before looking back at Alex. Knowing that her friend was going to explode when she told her the news " actually... I'm not his girlfriend."

Alex scoffed "What? You two are completely smitten over each other, why not make it official already?"

She reached over and opened the drawer, reaching for the box that housed her ring. She didn't want to wear it while Elliot and Alex was there so she removed it before going to the living room. She knew however, that this piece of information could not be hidden forever.

She let out a shaky breath before shoving the box into Alex's hands "it is official. Very official."

Alex furrowed her brow "hold up... Am I looking at Julia's ring right now or Olivia's ring?"

She chuckled, reaching for the plain golden band "This is Julia's and this is Olivia's."

Alex gasped, a look of pure shock and joy covering her face "okay, so Mike scrapped together some money for this ring and Trevor just dropped a whole stack for this one."

She laughed at her friends statement "it's not about the money... It's about what it symbolises. Julia and Mike are plain people who just love each other and want nothing more than to be happy together. Trevor and I have this spark, it's like raw passion. I can't keep my hands off that man, and it's the same for him, we just want each other. Plus he's not disgusting about it, he is gentle when he has to be and rough when needed. That man knows my body like the lyrics of his favourite song, and he also knows the Olivia that most people don't see. On the other hand he bought that rock because he wanted everybody to know that I was taken, happily taken."

Alex chuckled before narrowing her eyes at her friend "so you two are engaged?"

She nodded "yeah we are... But I don't know how long it's going to last because he didn't seem too pleased with everything that happened tonight."

"He will get over it... You just have to clear things up now, with both of them."

"I know... " she whispered, allowing a small smile to play on her lips "this must be weird for you... Your best friend is engaged to your ex. I'm sorry Alex."

Alex scoffed "there is no need to apologise Liv. Trevor and I were never that deep, hell I never loved him. He was a great kisser, and caring, I liked that but I wasn't really all in."

"I can't say the same. He is everything to me, recently my world was turned upside down and he fixed it piece by piece. Even now, he is still trying to find a way to fix the most painful thing either of us have ever experienced, some days we're okay and others not so much." her tears began gathering in her eyes again.

"What happened?" Alex asked with a concerned look. She couldn't help thinking that maybe Olivia's stay at the in the hospital was not as simple as she made it out to be.

Olivia let out a breath and rested her head against the headboard and wiped her tears "I didn't fall and get injured."

Alex took her hand and squeezed it "Olivia, why did you lie to us?"

"I was pregnant" she swallowed the lump that arose in her throat "three months along, and we didn't know and then when we finally found out it was too late for us to save it. I had an ectopic pregnancy, and the surgery was to end the pregnancy." she let out a sob "I couldn't even save our baby if I tried, and the only reason I went forward with the surgery was because Trevor begged me too."

"Because he knew that if they didn't terminate the pregnancy you could have died... I know this is hard but you both will get your break, your family" she said sternly, her own tears slipping down her cheeks.

"it was the hardest thing I have been through, no rape, kidnapping or any of those traumas could compare to the pain of losing my baby. I thought I would never be a mother and when it was finally in my grasp it got ripped away again. That's why I lied, it was too painful to admit to you all that I had just lost our baby, that I didn't want to come back because I was -am, afraid to face reality again."

"I understand why you didn't tell us, and I definitely don't blame you. How are feeling about all of this now?" she asked, wiping her friends tears.

She shook her head "I don't want to talk about it anymore... We need to go find those two, and I think I know exactly where they are."

"don't you dare shut down on me" Alex warned.

Olivia let out a chuckle before moving off the bed "I'm not shutting down, I am heading out to meet up with my fiancé and my partner and get a few drinks, because all these emotions are too much for a girl too handle and I haven't had a drink in months."

"okay but we get a booth, because I want a glass of fancy ass wine on Trevor's card since he has money to spend. Buying rings and all" she teased as she too stood to her feet and grabbed her high heels.

Olivia let out a soft laugh before grabbing a pair of sneakers "I'm not really in the mood for heels, so don't even comment on my attire" she warned walking down the stairs with Alex beside her.

Alex furrowed her brow when they stopped down the street "why are we stopping?"

"to pick up the other two recruits" she said with a smirk before honking, she turned to Alex and raised a brow at her "don't be a bitch."

"I don't want to see her" she said with a scowl.

Olivia smirked "if I have to face my bullshit, you have to yours."

Alex scoffed when Casey and Eva slipped into the backseat of the car. Casey sighed "where are we going?"

"To Aiden's club. He has the best bar in town and I don't know how to get there on my own since I was a bit preoccupied on our first and last drive there." Olivia said with a slight frown "so that is where you come in Eva..."

"Where does Casey come in?" Eva asked, sensing the tension.

"These two" she pointed between Alex and Casey "need to sort out their issues while I sort out mine."

"What issues do you have and why are we going to that douche's club?" Casey pipped up.

"I have men issues."

Eva sighed "I wish I had men issues."

"That makes two of us" Alex agreed.

Casey pursed her lips "my man problems are finally over... After all these years."

Alex looked at her through the rare view mirror and let out a breath, she was pissed that Casey didn't tell her anything after all their years of friendship. What infuriated her more was the fact that she just left, without saying goodbye or anything. She just dropped her, right after Olivia had died. She left when Alex needed her the most, when the squad needed her.

Casey noticed Alex staring at her and sighed, she knew all the secrecy would catch up with her, life had a funny way of making things like that happen. It had never been her intention to hurt anybody but she had to get away, for her own safety, her ex-husband would have killed her if she stayed in New York.

Eva looked between the two friends and shook her head, it was obvious that they missed each other, but they were both to stubborn to say anything. She rolled her eyes at them before clearing her throat "I doubt that Trevor would come to Aiden's club if you and him were having problems. This would have been the last place to even cross mind."

Olivia nodded "I know Trevor isn't at the club... But Elliot is and I want to clear the air first."

"Elliot is here?" Casey asked.

"Yeah, we flew in together" Alex pipped up before focusing on the road once again.

Olivia rolled her eyes at her friends stubbornness and sighed "are you two going to be this petty for these next three weeks until Alex leaves again?"

"You're staying for three weeks? Why?" Casey asked with a frown.

Alex pursed her lips "yes Olivia, I am going to be this petty."

She shook her head "great. Eva you better help me with these bitches."

Eva chuckled "you got it Liv, but first let's sort out your men issues... Then we can deal with these two"

"we're right here!" both of them said in unison.

Olivia let out a laugh "oh we know. You two are the reason there's so much tension in this car."

Alex scoffed "I'm not the one who lied, who betrayed her best friends."

"its not like that" Casey pipped up, scowling at Alex "you have no idea what i have been through over these past years. I-"

"Of course I have no idea because you lied about everything... Won't be surprised if you lied about everything else too."

"that's low Alex, even for you. You have been lying about who you are for most of your life and you didn't see me getting pissed because of it." Casey screamed, her anger making her forget that she was in the car with her friends.

Olivia let out a breath "play nice girls."

Alex scoffed "easier said than done."

...

**_A/N_**

**_Hey y'all._**

**_So this was a bit of a filler, but I hope you guys enjoyed it. Reviews are always appreciated._**

**_What1 do y'all_****_ think is happening between Casey and Alex?_** **_Will Olivia make it in time to speak to both Elliot and Trevor?_**

**_Anywho guess we'll have to wait and see._**

**_I love y'all. ️_**

**_-Karrrm._**


	20. Chapter 20

**Make Up.**

Olivia walked over to the bar where Elliot sat while the girls got a booth, she sat down beside him and forced a small smile when he turned to face her "hey."

He nodded, taking a swig of his beer "Hey yourself... You having anything to drink? "

She shook her head "I can't drink, I'm still taking meds."

He forced a smile "yeah I forgot, how are you? After your surgery and all."

"I'm okay, healing as best as I can... I just have to take it one day at a time I guess" she said with a nod.

He took another swig of his beer, his eyes drinking in her appearance. She had gained a bit of weight here and there, not that he had an issue with it, he thought she looked more beautiful than ever before. Her hair was growing out and her skin was glowing, in fact she showed no visual signs of being sick, until you looked into her brown eyes. He looked into those chocolate orbs and saw the pain that was hidden in them, it was obvious to him that she was hurting inside, but he knew she would not open up unless she felt that she had to.

He sighed "why are you here Liv? Why are you not at home, resting?"

She pursed her lips "I'm here because we need to talk... We have to deal with our problems sooner rather than later."

He nodded "makes sense. So tell me, do you want to be with me or not?"

"okay I'm not going to beat around the bush, I do have feelings for you but I can't be with you. You are married to an amazing woman and let's face it, you're never going to leave her. Plus she's carrying your baby so that should stop you from even thinking of being with anyone else." she said with a sigh.

"Apart from all the excuses you just gave me, why don't you want to go through with this. Cause Kathy was not stopping you six months ago." he raised a brow at her "tell me the truth Liv"

She ran her fingers through her hair "a lot changed in those six months. You got back together with your wife and you got her pregnant, I can't be the other woman."

He scoffed "You were not complaining about this other woman business when we were making out in the cribs."

A scowl covered her face "I was an idiot back then, but I realised my mistakes now. I will not wash my hands in a other woman's tears, she's at home raising your kids while you expect me to hook up with you."

"Olivia cut the act. Just admit that you lied to me, I know you're fucking Langan." he rolled his eyes, taking yet another swig of his beer.

Olivia shook her head, she had no intention of hurting him but he was being an asshole, and she had enough of it. It was clear as day to her now, it was never about love, it was all a game to him. A challenge that he thought he would win.

She narrowed her eyes at him "this is no act Elliot. I don't want to be your little secret, your whore. Also if you must know, yes Trevor and I are fucking, and it's great. Hell he's the best I have ever had, might I add he isn't the asshole you make him out to be."

"what happens when you two return to New York, he's going to drop you because he'll get bored." he smirked "you're not all that interesting Olivia."

"You expect me to believe that I'm not interesting, yet you flew all the damn way to see me. Trevor and I are happy, he treats me better than you ever could." she pursed her lips "as for New York, you'll get an invite to the wedding when we return."

Elliot looked down at her hand and saw the white gold ring that sat on her finger, he gasped "you two are engaged?"

"I'm sorry Elliot, but I deserve more than the shit you are offering me. He is willing to make me his wife, to love me without having to hide it, he wants a family with me. I'm not giving up everything I have just for you to walk out on me when your wife gives birth. I love you, but sometimes love just isn't enough."

Elliot was about to respond but she stormed off before he could say a word. She went over to the booth where the three women sat and handed Alex her car keys "I'm taking a taxi to where Trevor is, don't drink too much. We'll head back home with his car so I trust you three to get my car and yourselves home safely."

Alex took hold of her hand "how did it go with Elliot?"

She pursed her lips "I'll tell you three everything later, but for now I need to get my man."

Casey smirked "go get him."

...

She let out a breath as she walked down the trail to what had become their spot, the same secluded lakeside that they came to almost four months ago. Where their relationship became official.

She saw him, seated up against the side of his car, overlooking the lake they made love in all those months ago. She pursed her lips before making her way over to him and sitting down beside him.

Trevor noticed her coming toward him but didn't say a word, he turned to face her and forced a small smile.

"hey" she whispered, unsure of how to speak to him.

"hey... So I take your mind is made up?"

She nodded "yeah it is... It didn't take as much thinking as I feared it would. I took your advice and followed my heart."

He nodded, a sigh leaving his lips "I'm happy I could help..." he looked away from her, his eyes settled on the calm waters "you didn't have to come all the way to tell me, I knew I was setting myself up for a lose... But uhm, congratulations."

She furrowed her brow "Trevor what are you talking about?"

"let's not make this any more difficult than it already is, I know you chose Elliot." he said with a deep sigh, the hurt in his voice very evident.

Olivia took hold of his hand and felt her eyes well up with tears instantly "Trev baby no... It's you, it will always be you. You are the only man I want to be with, I love you with my whole heart, you mean everything to me."

He let out a breath of relief when she moved over to straddle him, and could not hide the smile that covered his lips "wait you're saying that you walked away from the man you loved for years just to be with me?"

She wrapped her arms loosely around his shoulders "I have all the man I need right here. I don't need or want anyone else. Trevor James Langan I love you so much"

He did not say a word in response, instead her pulled her toward him and allowed their lips to meet in a loving kiss. His tongue poked at her lips begging for entrance into her mouth, she granted him the much desired access and let out a moan of pleasure when she felt him exploring her mouth. Their hands moved in a frenzied state, searching for the velvety skin of the other, she let out a squeal when she felt him trail his fingers up her back, moving her t-shirt higher up her back.

Words were not needed, so instead they allowed their bodies to speak on their behalf. Olivia let out a moan when he broke their kiss and laid her down on the grass, her eyes shining with tears of joy and love as he began kissing a trail from her lips to her ample breasts. He moved back up her body until he got back to her lips, he gave her a few soft kisses.

A devilish grin appeared on his lips as he stared down at her "join me for a swim"

She rolled her eyes "hell no, that water is probably freezing cold."

"oh come on Liv, it'll be fun. Remember the last time we went skinny dipping here? It led to an amazing day." he said with a pout.

She rolled her eyes "Trev no... I don't want to be naked out in the open like this, what if someone sees us? We could-" he cut her off with a gentle kiss, eliciting a moan from her as his tongue snaked its way between her lips "hmm... Baby- we can't."

He trailed his kisses from her lips to her neck, "What happened to my fun loving girl who went paintballing and skinny dipping with me without fear?" he questioned playfully all while nibbling on her pulse point.

As much as she wanted to fight him, she could feel her resolute breaking, her fingers moving to tangle in his hair. Tugging at it in a harsh manner so that he was forced to look up at her "fine, you win" she bit her lip.

A massive, breathtaking smile covered his handsome face "you won't regret it. Come on"

The sound of light laughter left her lips as he pulled her up and helped her out of her clothes, a loud squeal escaped her when he picked her up and ran into the cold water. She cupped his cheeks and gave a deep kiss when he stilled in the water, both of them breathing heavily because of the sexual tension in the air.

His hands moved to wrap around her hips, one of them moving to gently tracing the scar that was left behind by her surgery. He eased out of their kiss and placed a loving kiss to her forehead, their bodies moving closer by instinct.

Olivia let out a heavy breath, her arms wrapped loosely around his shoulders and her forehead against his lips. She looked up at him after a minute or two "how crazy is all of this? You and I ending up together is something I never would have thought of. Yet now, that we're together, I don't think I'll be able to go too long without you by my side."

He cupped her cheek "I know that feeling all too well darling. That's why I came here, just get the feeling of us being together for what I thought would be the last time ever."

A smile tugged at her luscious lips, her gorgeous eyes were being highlighted by the brilliant sunlight that shone over them and they sparkled with unshed tears of joy. She wanted nothing more than to feel him loving her, touching her and taking her body in a way only he knew how.

She took hold of his hand that rested on her cheek and moved it down her body, a groan leaving her lips when his fingers trailed across her ample breasts. His fingers teasingly made a trail of fire down her now heated body, she threw her head back when his fingers ran over her slit, before dipping between her wet folds. A groan left her lips when his mouth attached to the exposed skin of her neck, marking her as his own.

His hand moved in a steady pace and she bucked into his hand, a silent plea for more. She panted when his thumb began swiping over her clit "fuck... Holy shit" she moaned out.

He chuckled against her skin "what do you say we move this party out of the water, I need more"

She nodded, still panting as his fingers were still moving in and out of her. She threw her head back and let out a soft groan "Trevor..."

He eased his fingers out of her before taking hold of her and carrying her naked form out of the water. He placed her down on the ground before grabbing the little picnic blanket that was in the trunk, he then laid her down on it before kissing his way up her naked body. She draped her arms around his shoulders and pulled him down for a passionate kiss, a groan escaping from the back of her throat when she felt him slowly pushing into her.

He eased into her until he was buried to the hilt, a groan leaving his lips at the feeling of being completely encased by her inner walls. She moved her legs up his waist and let out a pant when he began rolling his hips against hers. One of her arms moved from his neck to his back, her nails digging into his skin as he gripped her thigh, holding her firmly as their hips moved together in a steady rhythm.

Olivia arched her back when she felt him hitting her spot continuesly, she moaned "shit... Faster baby"

He kissed his way to her neck and bit down on the skin of her neck all while speading up his thrusts. Olivia could hardly believe what they were doing right now, they were in a secluded little lakeside having sex out in the open at midday. Yet she made no attempt to stop, instead she wrapped her legs tighter around his waist, forcing him deeper into her aroused lower body.

She gasped when she felt him deeper than ever before, her eyes squeezing shut. His free hand tangled into her hair, pulling her in for a deep kiss, while their bodies moved together. They remained in the throws of passion for the longest time possible, both of them bring each other to heights of ecstasy. They knew in that moment, while their bodies moulded together perfectly that they were meant to be. Somewhere along the lines of destiny they were always meant to be together like this.


	21. Chapter 21

**Reveal.**

Olivia laid cuddled up in Trevor's arms as they relaxed at the lakeside, both of them looking up at the sky that was darkening as the time rolled by. She had never felt such peace as what she was feeling now, she looked up at him and smirked "this is nice... Just the two of us relaxing and spending time to together"

He cupped her cheek "it is nice. I think we should make it a rule, but we don't have to come here, we could have a date night."

"You are crazy, what would we do and when would we have these date nights?" she asked with a giggle.

He kissed the tip of her nose "we can each take a turn to pick what we'll do, it can be once a week, or once a month. It does not matter, as long as you and I are spending time together."

A wide smile tugged at her lips "we could do it every second week... On a Friday night, and the first turn is yours."

"sounds perfect to me" he said before leaning down and giving her another deep kiss.

She cupped his cheek before easing out of their kiss "if you keep this up we won't leave here"

He smirked, before gently pinning her down "that was part of the plan darling" he kissed her neck, feeling her crumble in his arms "one more go?"

She allowed her fingers to tangle into his hair "fuck yes..."

...

Alex raised a brow at Olivia and Trevor as walked into the living room, giggling two teenagers who had been caught making out. She smirked "where the hell were you two? We were worried sick about you guys and then neither of you answered your phones"

Olivia let out a soft chuckle "we were at a secret place we like to go to every now and then"

Trevor wrapped his arms around Olivia's waist "plus you had no reason to worry, I would not let anybody hurt Olivia."

"hey love birds" Casey said, walking out of the kitchen with two glasses of wine her hands.

Olivia smirked when Alex took hold of the glass that Casey handed her "hey, Cas. You are out late... Or are you spending the night?"

Casey scowled playfully at her "I am not spending the night, but Alex and I will be spending the night at Eva's place."

Trevor furrowed his brow "okay, so it's just going to Liv, Elliot and me here?"

"Actually I checked myself into a hotel close by" Elliot said as he and came downstairs with his duffle bag.

Olivia scowled at him "as you should"

He sighed "can I talk to you for minute? Alone"

Trevor kissed the side of her head before giving her a sweet smile "go for it, we'll be right here waiting for you."

She turned to him and smiled up at him "this might take a while." she gave him a chaste kiss "and don't worry too much."

"scouts honour"

She chuckled "you are so corny."

"yeah whatever, get out of here" he said with a supportive smile. He stood silently and watched as she followed Elliot outside, he knew, they meant a lot too each other so fixing whatever was strained was important to both of them.

Alex smirked "so lover boy, how was the make up sex?"

He chuckled "it was great Alex, thanks for asking."

"all jokes aside... You better take care of her Trevor, and even though we all know she is tough as nails and can handle herself. She loves you and that does not coming easy for Liv so you better not screw up." Casey warned with a accusing finger pointed at him.

"I love her too, and I know this all so crazy and maybe rushed but to me, being Olivia is a dream and I simply want to live that dream. I want to give her everything that she always dreamed of and more. I just want to see her happy and smiling all the time" he said before taking hold of their photoshopped wedding photo, he ran his fingers over the picture of their smiling faces.

"I would love for her to be the happy and joyful person that I know she is. Although we all know there will be issues and problems, and I'm wiling to work through them. No matter what it takes."

"Okay you have my vote" Eva said with a chuckle "I'm sure our girl is going to be treated like the queen that she is."

...

Elliot sat down beside Olivia on the porch, both of them looking up at the night sky "you have no idea how many nights I sat on my porch, looking up at the sky and wondering if all the crap they tell us about loved ones looking down from heaven was true. I wondered if you could see me from up there, I thought about our last conversation, all of it." he sniffled when he felt himself getting choked up "I didn't want to believe it and for a short time I didn't believe it..."

"What changed?" she asked, nudging him gently with her arm.

He shrugged "everything... The hours turned into days and the days turned into weeks, and soon enough I realised that maybe, just maybe, this time you weren't coming back. That was when I realised just how you meant to me, I realised that I have been nothing but an ass to you."

"Elliot that happened months ago..." she started.

"I know" he nodded, before taking hold of her hand "still doesn't make it right... That was why I came out here, not to see you in the flesh but also to apologise for all the crap I put you through. That was the plan, but seeing you for the first time after six months caught me off guard and my emotions got the best of me. I didn't mean to hurt you, that was never my intention... I just wanted my best friend back"

"I am still here Elliot" she whispered, leaning against him.

He scoffed "you are Langan's girl now"

A smile tugged at her lips at the mention of his surname and it didn't go unnoticed by Elliot. She shrugged "so. I may be engaged to Trevor but I am still your partner and you are still my best friend... I care for you Elliot and I missed you so much over these past months but life goes on. I moved on, and I am happy, I don't think I am ever going to feel for another man what I feel for Trevor. "

"So you love Langan more than you love me?" he teased.

A blush creeped over her cheeks as she nodded "I do... I really, really love him."

He chuckled "if he takes care of you and loves you, then I am happy for you Liv. Just give me some time to get used to you and Tree boy being together."

She nodded "sounds perfect to me. Also stop calling him Tree boy, his name is Trevor."

"How did you two even end up together in the first place?" he asked with a blank stare, unsure as whether he really wanted to know or not.

Olivia chuckled "well... It all started with a little impromptu date in a café, which was brought on by me wanting to escape the douche bag that tried to drug me."

Elliot shook his head "okay, start from the very beginning, I want to know everything from when you two arrived to this morning before we came."

A smirk covered her face as she leaned up against him and told him of all the experiences she had since leaving New York. She told him all about Bethany and Alicia and how they had to move because of the guys closing in on them.

Trevor walked over to the window, with a beer in his hand and checked on his fiancee, a smile tugging at his lips when he saw her laughing and talking to Elliot with wild hand movements. He knew she needed this, she needed to see her friends to get her out of the rut that she fell into after they lost their baby. Seeing her friends was a step in the right direction, even though it started off rough and filled with tears.

Alex walked up to him and raised a brow at him, before taking hold of the curtain his was holding open and closing it. She gave him a sweet smile "you don't need to worry about those two, Olivia is madly in love with you. She won't screw it up, this mornings saga broke her enough."

"I know" he smiled "I was just thinking, how happy she looks out there... I haven't seen that full smile in a while now and it's beautiful to see that it's back."

"That's because all is right in my life now" she said as she and Elliot walked back into the house. She walked over to Trevor and stood on her toes to press a kiss to his lips.

He chuckled when she broke their chaste kiss "what was that for?"

"For your patience with me, you have been patient since the day we left New York and I hope you remain as patient when we return..." she said while cuddling into his arms.

Elliot shook his head before nudging Casey "she's going to be a bridezilla"

Casey chuckled "oh I can see it already... Running around screaming at everyone."

"please don't confuse me with Eva. She is a sappy little bitch when it comes to romance" Olivia teased, earning a playful scowl from Eva.

Eva scoffed "I'm a sappy bitch but you are the one who's all loved up."

Alex raised a brow at the couple "so are we all going to ignore those hickeys on Liv's neck?"

Olivia's hand immediately flew up to her neck, a gasp leaving her lips when everyone including Trevor started laughing. She felt her cheeks heating up and turned to face him "Trev what the hell?!"

He kissed her forehead "I'm sorry babe, it just happened in the moment."

"and you are only telling me now?" she scowled at him.

He shrugged "well I didn't really see it over your sex hair darling" he said before letting out another loud laugh.

Olivia hit him upside his head "yeah, enjoy yourself... We'll see who has the last laugh when you are sleeping on the sofa tonight."

He let out a laugh before following her to their bedroom. He smirked as she rushed into the ensuit and ran her hands through her hair, he leaned up against the wall and watched as she freshed up "Do you have any idea how amazing you are to me?"

She looked up at him "if it's anywhere close to how amazing you are to me then yeah, I have an idea."

He walked up to her and took hold of her hands, and kissed the back of each of them before pulling her into his arms. She bit her lip when she felt his hands moving to tangle into her hair, she pulled out of his arms and shook her head playfully "you are not going to rile me up again. Everybody is out there waiting for us"

A smirk tugged at his lips "which will make it even more fun" he leaned down and pressed a deep kiss too her lips.

She let out a soft groan before breaking their kiss "Trev baby, not now."

She smirked when she heard a knock on the door, she popped her head out of the bathroom and raised a brow at Eva "sorry to disturb, but do you have enough space for all of us to stay over. Because Elliot passed out on the sofa, I think he had one too many drinks."

Olivia walked out of the bathroom and closed the door behind her, a smirk on her lips when she heard Trevor start up the shower. Both of them needed a bath because of their lack side activities, she shrugged "yeah there is enough room, we have four bedrooms, including this one. You and Cas can share and Trev and I, Alex and Elliot will get the other two..."

Trevor walked out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist and smirked when Olivia and Eva eyed him, he walked over to her drawer and took hold of her underwear "I think it's Eva and Elliot who be sleeping in the separate rooms."

Olivia furrowed her brow "what is that supposed to mean?"

Eva let out a giggle "come on Liv, you need to see this"

She took hold of Olivia hand and dragged her down the stairs and into the kitchen, Olivia let out a gasp when she saw her two best friends standing up against the island. She could hardly believe what she was seeing, but in a strange way it made total sense.

She shook her head playfully, before clearing her throat "you two lovebirds need to get a room. You are worse than Trev and I" she teased.

Casey and Alex broke away from their intense lip lock and turned to face the other women with flushed cheeks. Alex took hold of Casey's hand and smiled "you were the one who told us to sort out our issues"

"That's because I didn't know that you two were fucking. When did this happen?" she asked with a smirk.

Casey shrugged "we never dated, we just hooked up once, like a year ago..."

"Well then, Eva I suggest you pour yourself a tight glass tonight because these two are clearly going to get rid of all the tension in the air."

Eva chuckled "I'll need more than one glass, there will be four people having sex tonight and I will be on my own. Life isn't fair."

"honey I am not having sex again tonight, I need a break" Olivia said with a laugh.

Alex chuckled "well you have been getting it all afternoon... So now it's our turn"

Casey smirked, gently tugging on Alex's hand "that's our cue to leave, goodnight ladies."

Eva scoffed "someone's in a hurry"

"Leave them be Eva, they need to get some of that frustration out... We'll get you a man soon." she said with a chuckle.

...

Olivia let out a sigh as she cuddled up in Trevor's embrace, she looked up at him with a smirk "Alex and Casey were making out in the kitchen"

He chuckled "they started when you and Elliot were out on the porch, Eva and I were having a conversation and didn't even notice that they had disappeared. Until I went to the kitchen for a beer and caught them making out, hands moving in a frenzy."

"Well if they are happy, then I am happy for them." she said before leaning up and pressing a kiss to his lips.

"I just don't know how to feel about the fact that two of my exes chose a female over me." he joked.

She let out a laugh "oh darling it's their loss. Alex was never much for men either way... But I can assure you that I won't turn on you, or run away with a bridesmaid."

"you won't be able to because the bridesmaids would be dating each other."

"there is always Eva" she smirked, before running her fingers down his chest "I can't wait to marry you"

"where do you want to get married?" he asked, pushing a piece of her hair behind her ear "here or New York?"

"at first I wanted it in New York but now I want it to be just us. You and I on the beach, with the priest and maybe your mom... A small and intimate ceremony." she said with a smile.

"that sounds perfect to me but uhm, let's not involve my mom...Just you, me, Casey, Eva and Alex. Maybe Elliot if he's still here"

"I like that" She shrugged "when though?"

He shrugged before kissing her again "soon."

...

**_A/N_**

**_Hey y'all_**

**_I had to get things moving along a bit because I want a few things to happen and I need to get there soon._**

**_Either way, this was just a bit of a filler._****_Things will pick up over the next few chapters and I have a few surprises coming as well._**

**_Any who, I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, let me know what y'all thought about it._**

**_Reviews are life, I love hearing your thoughts and opinions. _**

**_I love y'all_**

**_-Karrrm._**


	22. Chapter 22

**Mr and Mrs.**

Olivia rolled over and smiled as she looked up at Trevor's sleeping form. He looked so peaceful and handsome, she could not believe that he was with her. She cupped his cheek before leaning in and giving him a chaste kiss, she pulled away when he kissed her back. A smirk tugging at her lips "good morning handsome."

He pulled her closer to his body and gave her another kiss, this one slow and passionate. She let out a groan and pouted when he pulled away from her lips "good morning beautiful."

She bit her lip as she stared up into his blue eyes, a sad look covering her face "I sometimes wonder, would our baby have your eyes or mine, would he look more like me or you." she swallowed the lump in her throat "I really hope we get a second chance at being parents, I hope I will get to feel your child growing in me, to term. That we could argue about a possible name for our baby."

He kissed her forehead "We will get there babe, I promise you that we will have our baby."

"What if I can't fall pregnant again?" she asked with tears shining in her eyes.

"There is always adoption... Why don't we get the wedding sorted first and then we focus on babies okay?" he asked while wiping her tears.

She nodded "sounds like a great idea... Is it wrong that I don't want to wait?"

He pulled her into his arms, allowing her to rest her head on his chest "of course not darling, I don't want to wait either. If I had it my way I would marry you this weekend, on the beach, just the two of us and the girls. You with a flowy white dress and flowers in your hair, me in a suit and sneakers" he chuckled "As long as you are the woman on my side, I don't care how or when we get married."

She could not even believe this man was real, she knew now more than ever that she loved this man with her whole heart. She loved him more than she loved any other man, he was probably the most thoughtful human being she had ever been with.

"so let's do it" she whispered.

He furrowed his eyebrows "do what?"

She giggled softly "get married this weekend... On the beach, just us and the girls."

"What about Elliot?" Trevor asked.

"He said he will flying back home tonight, we made peace and he promised me that he won't tell anybody about you and I until we are ready to tell them."

"so I can't call my mother and tell her the good news?" he teased

She shrugged "honey if you want to tell your mother then tell her, I won't stop you. Plus maybe she and Thomas will fly in"

He scoffed "now that is wishful thinking, my mother hates flying, and now that she knows that I will return in the new year she definitely won't fly out."

"What about Thomas?"

"I don't know... He might, but I highly doubt it."

She looked up at him and ran her fingers through his short hair "are you going to call them to let them know about our wedding?"

He shrugged before giving her a soft peck "no because if I do, they will bring up the whole engagement with Liza and how it all flopped."

"I understand honey... But I don't want them to be mad because you just got married without them"

He rolled them over and placed a few more pecks on her lips "I don't care if they are mad or not. All I care about is you, and making you my wife."

She let out a soft moan when his lips attached to the skin of her neck "your mom is going to be pissed, she never even met me and I'm going to be your wife in less than a week. She's going to hate me."

He chuckled "she is going to hate you, that is why I'm going to marry you before she gets the chance to stop it. My mom has trust issues and it comes with good reason, but every woman I have ever dated got hell from her. Liza and I were engaged for a year because there was constant drama with her and my mother. I don't want you to go through that, I love you Olivia and I am going to make you my wife whether they like it or not."

She bit her lip "well I can't wait to make you my husband. That way I'll get to rub it other people's faces and let them know that this hunk is taken."

He chuckled before pulling her in for a soul touching kiss, he pulled away after a minute or two and smirked down at her "what do you say we grab some snacks and have an unhealthy breakfast then we sneak back in here and maybe have a little fun?"

She nodded "let's go."

Soft giggles were heard as the couple snuck out of their bedroom dressed in nothing but their robes. Olivia smirked as she watched Trevor grab whatever he could get his hands on, snapping a quick picture of him when he turned his back on her, she gave the most innocent face she could muster when he turned to face her.

He winked at her before taking her hand and leading back into their bedroom, she let out a hearty laugh when he placed their treats on the bedside table and pulled her onto the bed. She smirked up at him, her hair fanned out on the pillow, a wide smile on her lips and a spark in her brown eyes. Her olive toned skin sparkled underneath the sunlight that poured through the thin white curtains. She was a sight to behold, probably the most beautiful woman he had ever laid his eyes on, her smile took his breath away.

He leaned down and gave her a slow, deep and passionate kiss, cupping her cheek as their mouthes met, their tongues stuck in a slow yet sensual motion. Olivia let out a moan into their kiss, allowing her hands to move down to the belt that held his robe together. She made work of it in an instant and smirked as she pushed the offensive material off his shoulders. He did the same, untying the sash on her white robe, revealing her silky skin to him.

He leaned down and allowed his lips to attached to the skin of her neck, gently nibbling on her skin as if he was sampling her. Olivia let out a groan and allowed her nails to dig into the skin of his back and hiked her legs up his waist. She arched her back when she felt his fingers caressing her womanhood, her eyes shutting when he pushed two fingers into her heated entrance, stretching her almost instantly.

Trevor moved his lips from her neck to her lips, she tore her lips from his kiss and let out a groan "fuck Trevor, I need more." she moaned out, rolling her hips into his hand.

His fingers twisted inside of her before continuing the steady rhythm, his thumb swiping over her clit in rhythm with his fingers. She let out a low moan and fisted up the blankets when he flicked his wrist.

Trevor moved back to her neck and sucked at the spot he knew drove her insane, his fingers slamming at her g-spot. Her back arched again, a smirk tugging at his lips as he moved his fingers deeper into her core. He groaned when he felt her nails once again digging into his back.

"holy shit Trevor..." she moaned out when she felt the familiar stir in her belly. She knew that she was going to explode soon and reach a paradise only he could take her to.

He released her neck with a pop, smirking at the new hickey that sat proudly on her skin. He saw the pleasure stricken look on her face and knew that she needed just a little more to get her over the edge.

She gasped when she felt his tongue replacing his fingers, her hand flew to the back of his head and she moaned as he ate her out like the Pro he was. She arched her back and fought to silence her cries of pleasure as he continued his antics on her lower body.

Trevor smirked against her wet folds before he licked and sucked at her sex, he could hear the moans and whimpers that fell from her kiss bruised lips. It pleased him to know that she was enjoying what he was doing to her, he felt her hips bucking against his face. He sucked at her clit, leaving her completely breathless, she cussed as she came undone right there. A scream of his name leaving her lips as she felt her muscles clenching as her orgasm took over her body.

Trevor remained between her legs until she completely finished, licking up drop she gave him. He made his way back to her lips and gave her a deep, passionate kiss. Olivia moaned when she tasted herself on his tongue, her legs hiking up his hips "make love to me Trevor."

"with pleasure" he whispered, aligning himself with her entrance.

Olivia let out a gasp when he pushed into her, filling her to the hilt in an instant.

...

Olivia looked over at Alex and gave her a nervous smile "how do I look?"

Alex and Casey gave her sweet smiles "you look absolutely beautiful Liv... Trevor is going to blown away."

Casey grabbed hold of the set of hanging pearls and handed it to her friend "I love that you chose this instead of a massive poofy dress."

Olivia let out a chuckle, clipping her earings into her ears "thank you Cas... I have never been the big dress type and never will be." she eased her hands down her dress and smiled as she stared into the floor length mirror "I can't believe this is actually happening."

"Believe it baby, in a few hours you are going to be Mrs Langan." Eva said before handing Olivia a glass of champagne.

Olivia sat down and took a massive gulp of the bubbly liquad "are you guys sure this isn't too much? The hair, this dress... I just don't want to scare him off"

"Olivia those are your nerves talking... That man loves you with all of his heart, he adores you and wants to make you his wife. He is not going anywhere without you right by his side, also you look absolutely beautiful. Your hair is perfect and the highlights are making your skin glow even more than before. Your dress is beautiful, and I know he is going to be speechless when he lays his eyes on you." Alex assured her.

She let out a breath, and felt her eyes welling up "I miss my mom" she felt her tears drop "I just know she would have been proud... Drunk out of her mind but still proud, she would have been happy to see that I could make a success out of my life. I know it's been years but I miss her so much."

Alex moved over and pulled her in for a hug "oh darling, I'm sure your mother is smiling down on you, so proud to see the amazing woman you became."

Olivia swallowed the lump in her throat "thank you, all of you, for being here."

"I wouldn't miss it for the world" Casey whispered, giving her friends hand a supportive squeeze.

They heard a knock on the door and smirked when Elliot walked in after Eva opened the door. He stared down at his partner with a massive smile and tears shining in his eyes "you look absolutely beautiful Olivia... Trevor is a very lucky man, and I'm glad you found the one you want to spend the rest of your life with. You deserve this Liv, you deserve to be happy."

She walked over to him and pulled him for a tight hug "thank you El, for being here today."

He kissed her forehead, before pulling back and wiping her tears "its an honour to be here with you, to be able to walk you down that aisle is something I never thought I would do... Seeing you standing here in front of me is still so surreal, but I'm glad you made it."

She let out a soft chuckle through her tears "you guys are making me cry on my wedding day"

Eva placed her hand on Olivia's shoulder "come on, I'm sure Trevor is tired of waiting..."

Casey nodded "let's get you married."

...

Trevor looked down the beach trail and allowed a massive smile to cover his lips as he stared at his gorgeous bride-to-be, he could not believe that she was actually going to be his wife. They got their little beach wedding and it was absolutely perfect, the quiet beach was exactly what they wanted.

The aisle was decorated with flower petals and fairy lights, while Trevor stood beneath an arch that was decorated with a variety of colourful flowers and fairy lights.

Olivia felt her eyes welling up when she saw him standing there, dressed in a white shirt and a black pants. His hair was cut perfectly, he also had a light scruff on his face, but it was not messy. It was shaped and clean, she could not believe how handsome he looked just standing there.

Trevor swallowed the lump in throat and felt a massive smile tugging at his lips when he saw her, she looked perfect. Her hair was a blondish shade and she wore a plain silk, off white dress that hugged her body on the top half and the bottom hung loosely, with a slight train at the back of it.

Elliot walked beside her with a massive smile on his lips and tears in his eyes. Yes he was hurt that she chose Trevor but he was glad to see her this happy, her bright smile shone on her face.

She stepped in front of Trevor and felt her tears make their way down her cheeks when she saw nothing but love shining in his eyes when he stared at her. She bit her lip "I love you" she whispered.

He let out a soft laugh, his own tears dropping "I love you too" he mouthed back to her.

Her smile spread even wider on her lips, her vision getting slightly blurred because of her tears. She did not take her eyes off him as the priest spoke, she felt the butterfly's erupt when Trevor said those two little words that would make her his wife.

"I do" slipped out of both of their lips without a second of hesitation.

Olivia felt an impossibly massive smile covering her lips as she listened to the priest.

The priest smirked "ladies and gentlemen, it is my pleasure to present to you, Mr and Mrs Trevor Langan. Trevor you may now kiss your bride."

Trevor took hold of her hands and pulled her close and leaned in to give the most passionate, loving and intimate kiss they had ever shared. Her hands moved to cup his cheek while he held her waist firmly, their lips joint in a here to eternity kiss. She felt her tears dropping as they kissed, it was absolutely perfect.

Alex, Casey, Eva and Elliot cheered as they watched the couple kiss. Eva had arranged a photographer and smirked when he took some very up close photos of the kissing couple. Eva moved over to him and raised a brow "do you need anything?"

"yeah could you guys throw some petals while they kiss" he whispered.

Olivia and Trevor pulled away when they felt petals falling on them. Olivia giggled before looking up at Trevor "I love you so much."

"I love you too Mrs Langan" he whispered back before giving her another deep kiss.

She smiled against his lips, her eyes squeezed shut "please tell me I'm not dreaming"

He kissed her forehead "you are not dreaming love, we are married."

She let out a giggle, her head falling back slightly "god you are perfect."

"So are you. You are everything I could ever need in a wife and so much more." he pulled her close, hugging her gently.

They swayed slowly, wrapped in each others arms, their rings glistening under the sunlight and their smiles wide on their faces.

Yes they had an extremely intimate ceremony and yes they only had four guests, but it was absolutely perfect for both of them. It fit them both so perfectly, and if they could do it again, they would do it exactly like this.


	23. Chapter 23

**Surprise Guests.**

**6 Months Later:**

Six months had passed by and Trevor and Olivia were still experiencing the wedding bliss. It was a week before Christmas and the newly weds were q cuddled up in their bedroom, enjoying the warmth of their sheets. They spent most of the night making love and they were now laying and basking in the aftermath.

Olivia let out a soft giggle when Trevor started placing kisses to the skin of her neck "honey I need a break... We've been going at it for hours."

He moved back up to her lips and smirked "I know, I just can't get enough of you..."

She pulled him in for a kiss and smirked against his lips "I can't get enough of you either baby... I love you Mr Langan"

"I love you too Mrs Langan."

"I don't think I will ever get used to hearing that" she giggled.

He tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear "well you better get used to it because it's going to be that way for the rest of our lives."

She let out a happy sigh "well I'm happy with it."

He moved over and pulled her naked body into his embrace "we should get out of bed..."

"Do we have to?" she pouted.

"Yes, we still have to go buy Christmas decorations and put up our tree."

Her face lit up "we're getting a Christmas tree?"

He could not help the chuckle that left his lips, she looked like a child in a candy store and he found it absolutely adorable. He smirked at her and ran his hand down her body "yes darling we are. It is our first Christmas as a married couple after all, we need to celebrate properly."

"Trevor Christmas is a week away" she chuckled.

He kissed the tip of her nose "That means we are late."

She let out a hearty laugh "okay then let's get a move on and actually get something done."

He hesitantly moved out of their bed and walked over to the en-suite bathroom, he stopped by the doorway and raised his brow an inquisitive manner "are you going to join me?"

"no darling..." she gave him a small smile "I am going to call Casey because she has been very depressed lately because her girlfriend had to go back and might not be able to fly in on time for Christmas."

"okay... Join me when your call is finished?" he asked hopefully.

She walked over to him and took hold of her robe before placing a soft kiss to his lips "of course darling."

She called Casey and invited her over before heading to the shower with her husband, a mischievous smile on her lips when she ran her hand up his back. He pulled her into his arms and placed a kiss to his lips, his hands tracing over the naked skin of her stomach. She through her head back and let out a groan "fuck!"

...

Casey sat down with a sigh, she hated that Alex couldn't get a flight to Oregon at the moment, it was just so unfair that she would not be able to see her girlfriend on Christmas of all times. She let out an angry scoff "it's just not fair..."

Olivia sat down beside her "Case cheer up please... How well do you know Alex. She will find a way to get here."

"I know this just sucks, you get to have your husband with you everyday and I only get to see my girlfriend for a couple of weeks every few months." she pouted.

Eva rolled her eyes at her cousin "at least you have someone, I have been sleeping on my own for the last three years, it'll be four on Christmas day. I haven't had sex in forever and it's starting to have an effect on me."

Olivia chuckled "don't you two start your crap, I was single for a number of years before Trevor and I got together. I had not had sex for three years and I took the damn chance when it came up, so don't you dare start with your 'you have a man' crap."

Casey shook her head and chuckled "and now you're riding everynight"

"of course darling" she shot back with a laugh.

Eva scoffed "I need a man... Like desperately"

Casey and Olivia smirked at each other, both of them nodding when an idea came to mind. Olivia saw Trevor walk toward the kitchen and called him over "Trev... Is Thomas single?"

"Yes why?"

Casey smiled "well Eva over here needs a man and who better than your brother... I'm sure he will be great for her"

Trevor scoffed "Thomas is a pain in the ass and he is as cold as ice."

"oh come on, it can't be that bad" Olivia said with a sweet smile.

He reached for his phone that was ringing "speak of the devil..."

"Hey Tommy" he said with a scowl.

Thomas rolled his eyes "I have told you time and time again not to call me that. Where in Oregon are you staying?"

Trevor scoffed "why do you ask ass face?"

Thomas scowled down the line "because mom dragged me to Oregon to visit you and that hottie you are living with for Christmas."

"firstly don't call her that, her name is Olivia..." he said with a stern tone "and what are you on about? Where are you?"

Thomas cleared his throat "we are at Oregon Airport. I hope you and Olivia have room for all three of us, also can you pick us up at the airport?"

"Wait who is all three of you?"

"it's a surprise that I'm sure you will enjoy... Unless you have a girlfriend"

"Thomas I swear to god I will kill you, who is with you?" he asked more aggressively than before.

Thomas chuckled "you will have to wait and see. Also after you fake dying, mom is on a spree to get both of us married and have grandkids before we actually do die. So thanks for making my life difficult dumbass."

"nothing you are saying is making sense... I'll leave now and see you in an hour, but first, who is with you?"

"my lips are sealed." he chuckled "you are going to love this."

"I highly doubt that, I don't exactly trust your judgement because you are a fool... I have to go."

"yeah yeah, hurry up. I want to meet your sexy house mate."

"Thomas I swear I will break your-"

"calm the hell down, I won't touch unless she let's me." he said with a chuckle "I have to go, mom is calling me."

Trevor listened as he hung up and let out a groan "this is a mess."

"What's wrong?" Olivia asked, pulling him in for a hug.

He scoffed "I have to go to the airport... My mother and my brother is there waiting for me... Also they someone else with them but won't tell me who."

"You don't look too happy about them being here, why not?" she asked, taking hold of both of his hands in an attempt to calm him down.

"I am not happy about this. I love my mom, I really do but she can be extremely difficult at times. Also she doesn't do well with change, so me suddenly having a wife is not going to blow over well by her. Then Thomas who is a dick from time to time will probably be flirting with you 24/7 so you and I will have to deal with that. Plus they are going to be on my ass for our lack of decorations because my mom is big on Christmas." he explained with an irritated look on his face.

She cupped both of his cheeks "hey, we can handle this. If your mother doesn't take drastic news easily then we don't have to tell her immediately, we can delay it for a day or two... As for Thomas, I will put Eva after him, she needs a man after all."

"as for the decor, the three of us could go to town and buy some decorations. Obviously you and Liv will have to get the tree but that's not important for now, as long as the house has a few decorations I'm sure your mom will be okay. We will have everything up before you get back and also I will distract your mother as much as I possibly can so that you two can get time off to kiss and shit." Casey added.

Trevor let out a breath "I think that may actually work... Now I have to go"

"not so fast" Olivia said before standing on her toes and leaning up to kiss him.

Trevor cupped both of her cheeks and kissed her passionately. Olivia let out a soft squeal into his mouth when his hands moved from her face down to her waist.

She laughed against his lips "honey you need to go and if you keep kissing me like this I won't let you leave."

"I suddenly don't want to leave" he said with a chuckle.

She pulled him back for another deep kiss, letting out a soft moan "Trev we need to stop..."

"hmm" he whispered between their kisses.

Casey chuckled before walking up to them and pushing them apart, gasping when she felt something that she hadn't felt before. She looked up at Olivia and raised an eyebrow at her "Liv..."

She smirked before putting her finger to her lips "not the time... We'll talk about it soon but for now we need to get decorations."

Trevor leaned down and gave his wife one last chaste kiss before grabbing his car keys "I really have to go now. Also darling can you sort out the other three bedrooms, since we have three guests on their way?"

"I'll see what I can do but you will probably have to stall for a bit. Take them to lunch or something and then I'll text you when everything is under control?"

"sounds perfect" he said before kissing her forehead "I love you."

"I love you too" she whispered before watching him walk out.

She turned to Eva and Casey who were smirking at her, she knew what they were about to ask her about and shook her head "now is not the time ladies. We have a house to decorate before the mother-in-law arrives and I'm terrified of her reaction to everything... I need you girls to help me through this"

Eva walked up to her "of course we will help you..."

"Let's go" Casey pipped up before grabbing her car keys. She took hold of Olivia's hand and pulled her toward the front door.

Olivia shook her head "I need a coat, it's freezing out there and I need to keep warm."

"so go get it" Casey sassed.

...

Olivia let out a breath as she looked at the freshly decorated house, she shook her head before turning to her friends "we did it. We actually pulled it off."

"We sure did" Casey said before turning to Eva who was carrying a tray of eggnog.

Olivia smiled before pulling both woman in for hugs "thank you so much girls." she felt her eyes welling up.

Casey cupped her friends cheek "are you crying?"

She nodded before sniffling "yeah I do that a lot lately... I'm an emotional wreck."

"Why?" Eva asked with a suspicious look on her face.

A massive smile tugged at Olivia's lips and she shrugged "because..."

"oh my god! Are you pregnant!?" Eva asked with an excited squeal.

Olivia nodded and laughed while her tears rolled down her cheek "yes I am... Five months along to be exact... But we are not telling anyone until Christmas."

"Do you know what it is?" Casey asked as they sat down.

"Not yet... I find out in the new year." she ran her hand over the slight bump that started showing a month ago.

"This is so exciting!!" Eva squealed, she narrowed her eyes at Olivia "I was wondering why you went from wearing those tight jeans to wearing yoga pants and baggy shirts."

"Trevor and I enjoy the secrecy, while it's lasting. Don't get me wrong, I love being pregnant and I look forward to when the little one starts kicking and to when my bump gets so big that I can't hide it. For now though, this is our little secret." she ran her hand over her tiny bump and smiled down at it.

"And everything is coming along well so far right? God knows I don't want to see you hurting like the last time." Casey asked, she was worried about her friend.

Olivia shook her head "I have been to the doctor multiple times and so far everything is perfectly fine. Our little one is growing well and I haven't been extremely sick, I'm just a bit worried about the birthing process. I love this little one already, so much and when Trevor and I are alone all we do is rub this little bump."

"awww Liv you are glowing, I am so happy for you" Casey said before pulling her in for another hug.

Eva stood to her feet and sighed "i need to get those cookies out before they burn... Because then your mother-in-law won't be all that pleased."

Olivia nodded before wiping her eyes again "I need to get changed... I don't want Trevor's mom to see the bump or even suspect that I'm pregnant until we tell them that we're married."

Casey stood to her "I'll sort out that last bedroom while you get changed and Eva handles the meals."

...

Olivia heard a knock on the door and rushed over to open it. She forced a smile when she saw Trevor's mother staring at her with a raised brow, she stepped aside "good afternoon Mrs Langan, please come inside."

The older woman did a once over of the brunette "hi... You must be Olivia right?"

She nodded "that's right."

"Great. So uhm could you show us to our rooms... Also would you be a star and help Liza with her suitcases, she packed a bit heavy." his mother said with a sickly sweet smirk.

Olivia's eyes narrowed "Liza?" she pursed her lips. She could not believe that his mother brought his ex-fiancée into their home, her mind was running wild and her blood began boiling instantly.

"That won't be a problem right?" his mother asked when she didn't get a response from Olivia.

"Of course not." she gave the older woman a tight smile "my friend Casey will show you to your rooms while I help Liza."

"Great."

She rolled her eyes when his mother walked into the house. She knew this was going to be a very long week, her first Christmas as a married woman was going to be spent with her husband's ex-fiancée and she knew this was a disaster waiting to happen.

...

**_A/N_**

**_Hey all._**

**_So I decided to do a bit of a time skip because well, I had to get Trevor's momma in the picture._**

**_Let me know what you all think of Trevor's family's little surprise?_**

**_Also LIV IS PREGNANT!!!_**

**_I hope you all enjoyed this chapter._**

**_I love y'all. ️_**

**_-Karrrm._**


	24. Chapter 24

**Faulty Reservations.**

Olivia let out a soft gasp when she saw Liza strut into her home, she could not believe how gorgeous she was. Her long blonde hair flowed perfectly down her back, her eyes a deep shade of blue while her lips were the perfect shade of red. She was tall and had a brilliant blush to her cheeks, in short she looked like she stepped off a runway.

Olivia suddenly felt very insecure, seeing this woman suddenly made her feel so unworthy of her own husband. She forced a smile "hi, you must be Liza"

She smiled down at Olivia, showing off her set of pearly whites "yes I am... And you must be Olivia"

She nodded "yeah that's me."

She pursed her lips "are you going to help me with these bags? They are heavy and I can't carry them myself."

Olivia looked down at the massive suitcase and scoffed "I can't carry that."

"Why not?" she asked sweetly before doing a once over of Olivia "if you can carry all that weight everyday... my suitcase will be a breeze."

Olivia scowled up at Liza and took a deep breath "my weight is none of your business and if you are such a smartass then you can carry your own bag." she spat before storming off.

Trevor watched his wife storm off and let out a sigh "Liza do me a favour, don't comment on Olivia's weight when you are the one who just showed up at her house uninvited."

Mary heard her son speaking to Liza and scoffed "Trevor don't you dare speak to Liza like that. She came all the way to Oregon to be with you, and now you are mistreating her because of some woman you have only known for a few months."

Trevor scowled "mom I appreciate that you came all the way, but you did not need to bring Liza here."

"But Trev, you've been so alone since she left, I just figured having her back in your life would make you happy again." she said innocently.

Trevor shook his head "I am happy mom. I love my life... Liza walked out on me, on our wedding day. I-" he sighed "make yourselves at home, I need to check on something."

Casey and Eva stood in the kitchen and watched as Trevor rushed up the stairs, they immediately knew that this was going to be a very long week. Thomas walked into the kitchen and shook his head "hey ladies... I'm Thomas, Trevor's brother."

"I'm Eva and this is my cousin Casey... Nice to meet you" Eva said before moving over and shaking his hand.

He smirked "likewise... So tell me, Olivia, is she single?"

"No" Casey scowled "she isn't..."

"Okay cool, so where's her boyfriend?"

"he just ran up the stairs after her." Eva answered before narrowing her eyes at him "but you can't say anything."

He raised his hands in surrender "My lips are sealed... But now I need your help."

"With what?" Casey asked, crossing her arms over her chest.

"my mom is on a wife hunt and if she finds out that Trevor is seeing someone, she will either try to ruin his relationship or she will try to pin Liza on me. Don't get me wrong, she is hot as hell, but she isn't really my type. She is a bit to full of herself so uhm, will one of you play along if push comes to shove?" he whispered nervously.

Casey scoffed "sorry darling I have a girlfriend."

"What about you?" he asked.

Eva smirked "I'll think about it."

...

Trevor walked into the bedroom he shared with his wife and sat down beside her with a small smile "honey talk to me."

She shook her head "I don't want to talk."

He gently pulled her into his arms "Baby please just talk to me. What's bothering you the most? Is it my mom? Liza?"

"why would your mother bring your ex-fiancée into our home Trevor?" she shook her head "and that's not even what's bothering me, it's the fact that Liza could make me feel so inferior just by being here, she didn't even have to say a thing... But then she went and she called me fat, as if I don't feel horrible enough with all this damn baby weight." she sobbed out.

He allowed her to cuddle into his embrace and let out a sigh "I'm sorry you have to go through this, I'll speak to my mother and get Liza on the next flight out of here. Also I already had a word with Liza so I doubt she will be messing with you again."

"I hate feeling like this, I feel so ugly and fat... I just wanna go home" she sobbed out.

Trevor furrowed his brows "what do you mean? Do you want to go to New York?" he cupped her cheek "are you not happy here?"

"I don't know!" she spat, getting irritated with all the questions he was asking. She scoffed "I'm going to sleep, you can go out there to your family and Liza."

"what if I went down and made up an excuse to join you in here?" he asked, hoping it would cheer her up.

She shook her head "no. I don't want to have sex, just get out. I want to be alone."

He let out a soft chuckle before leaning down to her bump "hey there kiddo, I know you've been super well behaved until now... But do me a favour, stop making your mother think all of this crap. Can you believe she thinks she's ugly and fat" he scoffed "she must be crazy because whenever I look at her I see a gorgeous woman who is glowing while carrying my little one."

She rolled her eyes "nice try but sweet talk won't soften me up..."

"Well then, what will soften you up?" he asked with a soft chuckle.

A small smile tugged at her lips "a kiss, and pizza..."

He laughed softly "I'll do you one better, I will give you four kisses and I'll get us all pizza, but I'll get a special one for you and I."

He leaned in and placed a gentle kiss to her lips, cupping her cheek as his tongue slipped in between her lips. She let out a soft moan "can we skip dinner and just stay in. I changed my mind on that sex bit."

He let out a hearty laugh "as much as I want to, I can't right now babe, if I stay up here too long they will get suspicious."

She pursed her lips "okay... I understand, I'll take a cold shower."

He sighed "Liv I promise I will make it up to you... I'm sorry babe."

She forced a smile before giving him a chaste peck "it's okay."

He watched her walk into the bathroom and let out a soft groan, this was going to be a difficult week, especially with Olivia being pregnant and her hormones being all over the place. He walked out of the room and scowled when he saw Liza walking toward the main bedroom.

He stopped her "where are you going?"

"That is my room right?" she asked with a sweet smile.

"No. That's the main bedroom, it's Olivia's." he said.

She clicked her tongue "what's your deal with her? Every second word you say is Olivia..."

"Liza don't go there." he warned.

She rolled her eyes "fine. So where is my room?"

"down the hallway, the furthest one from this room."

"where's your room?" she asked with a smirk, reaching for the lapels on his jacket "I counted four rooms. We could share"

He pushed her hands off "no. I am sorted, don't you worry about me."

He walked down the stairs and sighed when he saw his mother making Casey and Eva redo some of the decorations. He reached for Eva and helped her down the ladder "Eva be careful."

She smiled up at him "thanks Trev... Your mom booked us all in at a restaurant nearby"

Trevor sighed "mom how many people did you book for?"

"Six people. That's all of us." Mary said before biting into one of the cookies Eva offered her.

"We are seven people in total, so who isn't invited?" Trevor asked with a frown.

Mary smirked "Olivia. After the way she mistreated my future daughter in law, I don't see her as a part of this family."

Trevor scoffed "that's unbelievable mom! You don't even know her. Olivia was injured recently, you saw that she was in hospital and then Liza disrespected her about not being able to carry that damn heavy suitcase and suddenly she's the bad person."

Mary stood to her feet "Trevor James Langan don't you dare speak to me with that tone! I don't want that woman sitting around a table with me, and that is final. I have no idea why you are covering for her but I don't like her."

Trevor shook his head, completely appalled by his mother's behaviour "Mom you can't jus-"

"Trevor stop." Olivia said softly.

He turned to face her and saw the tears in her eyes "Liv-"

"no. That is your mother, and you have to respect her. I am okay with staying here, I don't feel well either way." she said with a tight lipped smile.

"Even she knows not to argue with me" Mary said with a smirk. She scoffed before turning to Olivia "and don't you dare think this will get you into my good books."

Olivia smiled back at her "trust me when I say that your good books is the least of my worries."

Mary scowled "watch the way you speak to me."

Thomas sighed "mom can we just go please. We're going to be late for our reservation"

Trevor shook his head "I am not going"

"Why not?" Liza asked.

"neither am I, thank you so much for the invite Mrs Langan but I already have plans" Casey said with a forced smile.

Eva was about to protest but stopped when Olivia shook her head. Casey turned to her cousin and pursed her lips "but Eva is free..."

"I am?" she asked confused.

Olivia nodded "you are. I'm going straight to bed, I don't feel well so you go and enjoy yourself."

Thomas smirked "plus I will be there to keep you company..."

A small smile tugged at her lips "okay then I accept."

Mary scoffed "Trevor are you coming along yes or no?"

He shook his head "no I won't be joining you all, have a good time."

"I booked this dinner to get to spend time with you, we have been apart for a year... I missed you son" Mary said with pleading eyes.

"You and I will have all the time to catch up over the next week... How long will you all be staying?" he asked as calmly as he could.

"we leave on the 6th of January..." Thomas pipped up.

Olivia swallowed the lump that arose in her throat and shook her head, sniffling softly "we thought you were just staying for Christmas."

"Well you clearly thought wrong." Mary shot back with a scowl.

Casey took hold of Olivia's hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze "Liv will you help me in the kitchen for a second?"

She nodded before following Casey into the kitchen, she let out a groan "is it wrong of me to say that I hate them? Because I totally hate them."

"Look I know they are massive pains in the ass but you have to remember that is Trevor's mother... You both need to come clean and tell them about everything before things get pulled out of proportion." she whispered, checking that nobody was in earshot of them.

Olivia rolled her eyes before reaching for the jar of cookies on the counter "I just wanted them to settle in and then we'll tell them, give them a day or two to get to know me... Clearly that won't work because I became enemy number one by default."

"Are you crying because you're sad or..." she asked, seeing the tears that dropped from her friends eyes.

Olivia wiped her tears and shook her head "I swear this kid finds joy in seeing me cry..."

She chuckled "hey atleast you can still crack jokes and aren't bitter"

"My life is a joke at this point, I don't even know if my husband is going to sleep beside me tonight or if he'll sleep downstairs to make things look less obvious." she scoffed "this is pathetic."

"and on top of that you now also have Liza to worry about. She looks like she would pounce on Trevor with any opportunity she gets... She clearly can't be trusted."

"Even if she had a halo above her head and angel wings coming out of her back I still would not trust her. She clearly wants Trevor and she looks like the type that won't go down without a fight. Only difference is, she already lost, they are just unaware."

Casey furrowed her brow "so what, you're just going to allow all of this?"

She shrugged "I am going to let them think they won, and then at the right time I'm going to make them aware of everything."

"so this dinner, why not put up a fuss?"

"me staying makes them think they've won... Eva is there to inform me if they start scheming. If they thought their faulty reservations were smart then they will be speechless when my plan unfolds."

Casey chuckled "not only is that kid making you cry, it's making you crazy too. Like insane and almost bpd'ish."

Olivia threw her with a cookie "that is not funny" she chuckled.

Casey smirked "but it did make you laugh so I win"

Trevor walked into the kitchen and leaned down to press a kiss to Olivia's lips "I'm sorry that you have to go through all of this babe."

She cupped his cheek "this was my idea in the first place, I just didn't think that I would need to compete for my own husband."

He placed his hand on her thigh and smirked "you have zero competition, you're my wife so you already won."

She nodded "now we just need to make your mother and Liza realise it."


	25. Chapter 25

**Soften The Blow.**

Mary and the rest of the group came home later that night and found the house all tidied up, yet Trevor and Olivia were nowhere to be found. She looked around and scoffed "I wonder where those two snuck off to"

"It's midnight, they are probably asleep somewhere upstairs." Thomas explained.

Mary narrowed her eyes at him "how many bedrooms does this house have?"

"Four. Why?" Thomas asked.

"because we are five people staying in this house, which means two people have to share a room. Trevor better not be sharing a room with that whore" she said with a scowl.

"her name is Olivia, and no I'm not sharing a room with her. I'll be sharing a room with Thomas." Trevor said while walking down the stairs.

He and Olivia had decided that maybe sharing a room was a bit drastic so they agreed that Trevor share a room with his brother and then he would sneak out in the middle of the night to be with his wife. It was unconventional but the secrecy was fun and Olivia was all for it.

Mary smirked "and here I was starting to think that you and Olivia were together... That was the most disappointing thought of my life."

"I thought you wanted your sons to get married and start families, or was Thomas lying?"

"No darling, Thomas wasn't lying... You won't have all the time in the world to find the perfect woman and to start a family so your mother is helping you" Liza pipped up with a sweet smile.

"yeah that's a horrible idea, but I'm going to bed now" he said before going to the room he and Thomas would be sharing.

Olivia laid in her bedroom, dressed in a pair of shorts and one of Trevor's shirts, her hand rested against her little baby bump as she hummed the tune of a Christmas songs softly. Her hormones had been all over the place today and she was feeling a bit queezy so she decided to catch an early night.

She ran her hand over her bump and let out a breath "hey kiddo, I don't know if you can hear me but I need you to take it easy."

Her nails gently traced the stretched skin of her abdomen "I know this whole predicament is unethical but I need you to stay calm for me, when your dad eventually comes to bed he can speak to you a bit." a smile tugged at her lips "his voice always calms you down."

...

Trevor sat down on the bed opposite Thomas' and gave him a tight smile "it's good to see you again Tommy, it's been years."

"Walking out on you and mom was a massive mistake, one that I will never forget. I'm actually glad to get to spend this time with you, even though it's mostly you, mom and Liza arguing. Also your girlfriend is even more beautiful in person"

He smirked "yeah she is... Wait, how did you know?"

He chuckled "the way you defended her was the first clue. Then you stayed behind to take care of her, also I saw that little bump, she's pregnant?"

"5 months" he said with a wide smile "we are going to tell mom on Christmas"

"she's going to be pissed" he said with a laugh "but on the upside you would finally be doing right by your girl."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"you need to man up... Tell mom that you love Olivia and that you are with her and make it happen. This is your house and you have every right to be with the woman of your choice. As for Liza, the only reason she's back is because her girlfriend married some other woman and now she's broke. She wants to marry you because the firm is in your name." he explained.

Trevor laid back and let out a breath "it was her idea not to tell them... You are right though, In fact, I have to go and check on her, she said she wasn't feeling too good."

Thomas fist bumped his brother "go take care of your lady love, I'll be here. I'll lock the door incase mom or Liza decide to do a check."

He chuckled "thanks Thomas."

"No problem"

...

Olivia cuddled into Trevor's embrace and let out a sigh "I feel sick"

"What's wrong love?" he asked while playing with her hair.

"I don't know, I just don't feel well... I feel nauseous and light headed" she said with a groan.

He leaned down and pressed a kiss to her forehead, his other hand resting against her bump "could it be morning sickness acting up again?"

"I doubt it. I've been feeling crappy the whole day, but it's a lot worse now."

"Do you want me to get you anything?" he asked, a worried look covering his face "some ginger ale maybe?"

"hmm" she said before moving out of his arms and sitting up straight. She took a deep breath and placed her hand on her bump "what's going on in there kiddo?"

"I tell you what, I will fix you some ginger ale and a light snack and then you will try to get some sleep, and tomorrow we can sneak out really early and go to the doctor." he said while moving to sit beside her.

She gave him a tight lipped smile "sounds like a brilliant plan..."

He kissed her forehead "okay you relax here for me."

"or I could join you, I don't wanna be alone." she said with a pout.

He chuckled at her cute expression, he could hardly believe how beautiful and perfect she was, her brunette hair was tied back slightly and she wore nothing more than his shirt and a pair of boy shorts. She had no make up on yet she was still the most beautiful woman he had ever seen, in fact he always caught himself wondering how he managed to get a woman like her to settle down with him.

"Okay. But only because you're cute" he said with a smile, standing up and extending his hand to her.

She took hold of his hand and followed him downstairs silenty, neither of them wanting to wake their guests. Olivia sat down on the kitchen island and watched as Trevor moved around, her fingers gently running over the covered skin of her bump.

Trevor moved around the kitchen and prepared what he needed to make and stopped when he heard Olivia gasping. He turned to her and raised a brow "what's wrong?"

She shrugged "I can feel the baby moving, not much but very slight movement."

He beemed with fatherly pride as he moved over and placed his hands on her bump "hey kiddo, it's way past your bedtime... You're making mamma feel sick with all that moving."

She ran her fingers through his hair "don't scold our baby already..." she gave him a small smile.

"sorry kiddo" he whispered, placing a kiss to her bump.

She shook her head "you and I need to finish up here before someone comes down and sees us."

"I know the plan was to tell them on Christmas day but what if-"

She placed her finger onto his lips "no. Give your mother her wish, even just for a few days and let her see how wrong she is. She will realise that she was wrong in trying to pin Liza on you, and she will see how happy we are"

"What if she doesn't see it?"

"then we atleast tried." she whispered, before lifting his chin and leaning down to press a kiss to his lips.

She broke their kiss when air was necessary and gave him a sweet smile "come on, let's go to bed... We have a long day ahead of us tomorrow."

He took the ginger ale and snacks and followed his wife back into their bedroom, making sure to lock the door behind them. She sat down on her side of the bed and drank some of the ginger ale, before smirking when she felt Trevor placing kisses to her shoulder.

"honey if I didn't know any better I would say that you were trying to get me worked up" she said with a soft moan.

He smirked against her skin "only if it's working."

She let out a hearty laugh "it definitely is."

...

Olivia walked into their home with Trevor trailing behind her, her eyes were red and puffy from crying and she could hardly believe the news they received from their doctor. She went into the kitchen and gave Mary a tight lipped smile before going to pour herself a glass of water.

Mary raised a brow at her son "where did you two disappear to?"

"Olivia had a doctors appointment and I offered to take her since she wasn't feeling well enough to drive" Trevor explained, shooting his wife a concerned look.

She had not said a word since they got the news of their little one and he was starting to worry "Liv, are you sure you're okay?" he asked, not caring that his mother was around.

She shrugged, her eyes welling up once again "I'm fine. I- I'll be upstairs if anybody needs me. If Cas comes by tell her that I need to speak to her" she sniffled softly.

Trevor reached for her as she tried to push past him "hey, take it easy..."

She nodded and gave him a small smile "yeah... Thanks"

He watched her walk out of the kitchen and sighed, she looked absolutely torn and he had no idea what to do to make her feel better. He wanted to ask his mother for advice but he knew she would not help him, not when it concerned Olivia. He ran a hand down his face before walking over to his mother and kissing the side of her head "morning mom."

She smiled brightly at him "do you have any idea how it was those first six months, not hearing your voice or knowing if I would ever see your blue eyes again. I missed you so much Trevor"

He pulled her in for a hug "I missed you too mom" he chuckled softly "Olivia and I would spend hours just talking about the type of people our parents were. She always said that she wants to meet you, just to thank you for being an amazing mother to me... Now you are all treating her like an outcast and it hurts me, because that woman is my best friend."

Mary sighed "I just don't want you to make a mistake, I'm looking out for you. Olivia is beautiful, but she just seems like such a cold and distant person."

"That's because you didn't even give her a chance, she was judged from the minute you arrived. Then on top of that you guys make all these plans and exclude her, but include her best friends." he helped his mother with the breakfast she was preparing and gave her a small smile "Just try and get to know her? For me"

"Why does this mean so much to you?" she asked sceptically.

He shrugged "because that woman has been my rock for the last year, every time things got too much she would be the one to remind me that it would all be worth it when we finally got home. She helped me deal with past issues" he let out a breathe "she helped me deal with Tif's death and the hell Keith put us through... She's a good person and she has never judged me nor you for what we've been through."

Mary pursed her lips "you told her about Keith, and Tiffany?"

He nodded "yeah, we really opened up to each other."

"You have never told any other woman that, why her?"

"I care for her, very much. She's been through some crappy things and we helped each other deal with it. That's why Olivia and I are so close, she knows me better than any other woman has, apart from you." he explained with a smile.

Mary nodded "okay... If it will make you happy, we are going to dinner tonight again and I would love it if you came along. Olivia can join us"

A massive smile broke out on his face "I will let her know" he kissed his mother's forehead again "thank you mom."

"Don't thank me just yet boy. I am only going to try to get to know her, that doesn't mean I will like her. Also I still want you and Liza to be together."

He rolled his eyes "Liza and I are never going to be together because I don't feel anything for her. She irritates me and not in a good way... She made her choice three years ago, and I made mine."

Mary scoffed "hey, if I can get to know Olivia then you can at least be nice to Liza and make her feel a little more wanted."

He sighed "I will be nice to her, but that is as far as it goes."

...

Olivia sat down between Liza and Trevor and forced a smile as Mary sat opposite her. Thomas and Eva sat on the same side of the classy booth as Mary. Casey had decided not to join them for dinner again because she and Alex had a long Skype session due and she wanted to spend as much time possible speaking to her girlfriend.

Mary pursed her lips "so you're a detective, what's that like?"

"it's fun I guess... We are always looking leads and the plus is that we get horrible people off the streets... On the downside though, we work with gruesome cases"

"have you and Trevor ever worked together?" Liza pipped up.

Olivia shrugged "we only worked together once, on most of our other cases we worked against each other."

Trevor let out a soft chuckle "I remember dreading the days I had to work into 16th precinct, just the thought of you and Stabler giving me crap was enough to ruin my day."

She nodded "well seeing you wasn't a pleasant experience for us either. It was as if you sucked the joy out of that place just by entering because every one of us knew you were going to represent some scumbag and could possibly get them to walk."

"So you two weren't friends?" Mary asked.

Trevor and Olivia shook their heads and laughed, Olivia pursed her lips "I hated you so much. Everytime you entered the precinct I wanted to wipe that stupid smirk off your face and I wanted to kick your ass every time I had to sit in interrogation with you"

"So how did you two become such close friends?" Liza asked, accentuating the word friends.

Trevor placed his hand on Olivia's thigh, a silent reassurance that everything was fine "when we had to go into witness protection, we were forced to play spouses and to live together. When you spend every single day with someone you learn a lot about them, I got to know Olivia. Not Detective Benson, just Olivia the person, and she's a pretty great person."

She felt her cheeks hearing up at his compliment, Mary noticed Olivia's flushed cheeks and scowled "Liza and Trevor had love at first sight... They saw each other in a shopping centre and it was sparks flying. I remember trying to get his attention but he was so focused on her that he saw nobody else, that was when I knew they were meant to be together, no matter their mistakes."

Olivia took a sip of her juice and felt Trevor squeeze her thigh, what he didn't know was that he was unintentionally turning her on. She forced a smile as she looked up at Mary while taking hold of Trevor's hand and clutching into hers "well I wish I could say the same but I'm not a love at first sight type of girl. I have to actually know someone before I fall for them..."

"well if you don't believe in love how are you ever going to find the person meant for you, when will you marry and start a family." Liza asked.

Olivia squeezed Trevor's hand beneath the table "I already found the person that's meant for me, and the rest will follow."

"Well where is this person?" Mary asked in a sceptical manner.

Trevor pursed his lips "let's not pry that much into Olivia's life."

"I'm just trying to get to know her" Mary said with a smirk.

Eva scoffed softly "more like you're trying to soften her up."

"did you say something Eva?" Mary smiled.

She shook her head and offered the older woman an innocent smile "I just said that I would like more beer in my cup..."

"it's a glass genius" Liza pipped up.

"it's a beer mug..." Olivia defended "genius." she scowled.

**_... _**

**_A/N_**

**_I just want to take a minute to thank you all for all the reads. I appreciate all of you that read, followed and left reviews on this story and I hope that you guys are enjoying this so far..._**

**_Let me know what y'all thought of this chapter._**

**_Reviews are life!!_**


	26. Chapter 26

**Unlocked.**

***Smut Alert***

After their dinner everyone went their separate ways and didn't argue for rest of the evening. It was peaceful and quiet. Mary sat in the living room with Liza and Thomas, the three of them watching some show on television. Olivia cleared up the clutter in the kitchen with the help of Trevor before heading upstairs to take a shower.

Trevor stayed downstairs for some time before going up to join his wife. She was slightly startled when she felt an arm wrap around her from behind, but once she realised who it was she cuddled into his embrace. She turned so that she was facing him and allowed a small smile to cover her lips when he leaned down and kissed her.

His mouth crashed against hers in a release of pent up passion, both of them caught up in the moment. They didn't care that anybody could come upstairs and find that he wasn't in the room he was supposed to be sharing with Thomas. None of that mattered to them, only each other and the passion they were sharing mattered in that moment.

Olivia let out a soft whimper when he pinned her up against the wall, her eyes squeezed shut as she allowed him to press hot, open mouthed kisses to the skin of her neck. She felt his mouth move further down her body and had to bite back a moan when his lips wrapped around one of her nipples. She could not remember the last time she wanted him this badly, no needed him.

Trevor heard her soft whimpers and payed special attention to both of her breasts before making his way down her body. She let out a soft gasp when his lips came into contact with her womanhood, her hand instantly falling to the back of his head. His tongue slipped between her wet folds, and he couldn't help groaning at the glorious taste of his wife, a taste he could never get enough of.

Her head was pressed against the shower wall as he ate her out like a pro, sucking and licking her most intimate parts. After a minute or two, he slid two fingers into her soaking heat, causing an unintentional moan to roll from her lips. She tugged at his hair before pressing his face further into her, she was so close to her climax that she couldn't help but roll her hips in rhythm with his mouth.

Trevor smirked against her before pushing his fingers deeper into her and running his thumb over her clit simultaneously. Her back arched as she felt that familiar tingling sensation in the her stomach, a sign that she was close to the edge. Trevor knew she was holding back and gently flicked his wrist, causing his fingers to hit a sensitive spot, which set her off instantly.

His mouth moved back to her core as she let out a low groan, her juices flowing in torrents as her orgasm hit her with brut force. Her eyes were squeezed shut again her hand pulled at the hair on his head as she tried her hardest not to scream out. She rolled her hips into his face as he continued to lap up every single drop she gave him, his mouth expertly attached to her. Her legs trembled as she rode out her orgasm, her chest rising and falling rapidly.

Trevor stayed positioned between her thighs until she completly rode out her orgasm, only kissing his way up to her lips when he was certain that she was satisfied. Their mouths crashed together instantly, and she moaned when she tasted herself on his tongue, she could hardly believe how much she missed being this intimate with him.

She broke their kiss when air became necessary "wow" she whispered.

He wrapped his arms around her waist and smirked down at her "you drive me insane"

"I can feel that" she said with a smile, before motioning to his raging erection that was pressed against her thigh.

He chuckled "well I can't help but get turned on by my gorgeous wife."

She raised an eyebrow "then why don't we move this party to the bedroom?"

"that's a brilliant idea" he whispered before picking her up and carrying her into their bedroom.

She let out a soft squeal when he leaned down and pressed his lips to her neck. Her arms moved around his back as he hovered over her, her legs moving to his waist. She let out a groan "hmm, baby."

She pushed at his shoulders and smirked when he allowed her to move on top of him. She straddled him and gripped his throbbing hard on in her hand, a groan dropped from his lips when he felt her hand on him.

He seethed "easy Liv" he said while shutting his eyes.

Olivia smirked when she heard his groans falling from his lips as she pumped him slowly. She felt powerful, watching her husband try his best not to come while all she did was hold him in her hand. She looked down at his erection and bit her lip, running her thumb over the tip of his manhood.

"Fuck!" he groaned, pressing his head back against the pillows.

"you're so sexy right now..." she whispered, moving further down his body.

Trevor gasped when he felt her lips kissing up the side of his throbbing dick, trailing along the vein that ran from base to tip. She flicked her eyes up to him, tapping her hand on his thigh to get his attention "look at me"

He let out a groan, focusing on not coming to soon before flicking his eyes down to his wife. He nearly came at just the sight of her, her hair hung loosely beside her face, her brown eyes now a shade darker than before. He let out a strangled moan when he watched his erection slip between her lips, feeling himself getting encased by the wet, slick heaven that was her mouth. It had been too long since they have been this intimate.

His hand flew down to tangle in her hair as she took further into her mouth, feeling him at the back of her throat. She swirled her tongue around him and let him go with a pop "relax honey, let me take care of you." she whispered, gently scratching his thighs before taking him into her mouth again.

She sucked him hard, her head bobbing up and down, while her free hand fondled his balls. He could no longer hold back and started rolling his hips into her face. Gripping the sheets with one of his hands.

Olivia let out a moan and watched as his eyes focused on her, she could feel that he was about to come and smirked before easing him back into mouth again. She heard him let out a loud unintentional moan as he came in her mouth, his hot seed pouring down her throat. She moaned at the taste of him and swallowed every single drop he gave her before kissing her way up his body.

"you drive me absolutely insane Mrs Langan. I love you" he whispered before pressing a deep, passionate kiss to her lips.

She groaned "I love you too"

He rolled them over so that she was laying with her head on his chest and allowed his breathing to regulate before running his fingers over the naked skin of her protruding midsection. He pressed a kiss to her forehead and smiled "I can't wait to have our baby out here... I just know that our baby is going to be absolutely perfect."

She placed her hand on top of his "we need to pick out a name... And maybe do some shopping after Christmas"

"How long do you want to stay here, before we head back to New York?" he asked

She shrugged "I want our baby to be born in New York, but I don't want the squad to know about it... Not until we tell them about our marriage."

"So what do you suggest we do?"

"I don't know" she whispered.

He caressed the skin of her bump softly "we could fly in around February, and get a place out of the City. Where you and I could stay and hang low until after you have the baby, and then if you're up for it we could invite them all over for dinner and tell them everything."

She looked up at him with a smile "that sounds absolutely perfect."

He nodded before pulling her in for a soft kiss "we have to celebrate"

She let out a hearty laugh, her head falling back "honey we have been up here for the last hour, your mother is going to get suspicious."

He shrugged before rolling on top of her, pinning her hands above her head "I don't care. I need you, I can't get enough of you."

"fine, but you have to be quiet" she warned before rolling on top of him and easing onto his erection.

She let out a groan before pulling her hips back and sinking onto him completely. Feeling him inside of her like this was something she would never get enough of, he fit so perfectly.

Trevor let out a low groan when she started moving on top of him, her hips grinding into his as she rode him gently. Her movements were slow and steady, yet powerful and the fact that her hormones were going insane was making it all the more pleasurable. She leaned forward, her hands on either side of his head as she sped up a bit, his hands gripped her hips while the other moved to caress her breast.

She threw her head back and let out a breathy moan, as their hips rocked together in a steady rhythm. He laid beneath her, bucking up into her and focusing on not making any loud noises as his rode him like an expert. She pulled him up against her, her arms wrapped around his shoulders as their chests were pressed together.

A loud gasp left her lips when she felt his lips wrap around her nipples, her eyes rolling. She was enjoying their intimacy but she was getting tired and he could see it and feel it as her movements became slow and weak.

Olivia let out a frustrated groan "Trev... I need more" she whispered.

He gently rolled them over and clutched her hand in his, entwining their fingers. He kept his movements slow and steady as he pushed in and out of her, hitting her g-spot with every thrust.

"you are so beautiful" he whispered as his lips found hers again.

Olivia had never felt like this before, that feeling of pure love and safety encased her entire being as she lay beneath her husband, their body's joint in the most intimate way. Not only did she love him, she was in love with him and she knew that marrying him was the best choice she made in her life. It was no mistake, no matter what his mother and family said, they would always be together.

This love they shared was deeper than all the crap they had to face, it was deeper than anything either of them experienced. As much as it scared her, it also made her feel alive. It was a terrifying thought at first, because she loved Elliot for twelve years, how could she love Trevor even more than she did Elliot when they were only together for a short while. She could never understand it, but she didn't need to, her heart belonged to Trevor Langan and their little love bundle that was growing in her little bump and she would not want it any other way.

"I love you" she moaned out, her back arching and her legs moving to wrap around his waist.

He felt her muscles start to contract around him and kept his strong movements going, making her see stars as she approved her climax with such speed.

"Trevor!" his name tore from her lips like a solemn prayer as she came undone all over his dick. She closed her eyes and tried her best to bite back the scream of pleasure that threatened to leave her lips.

Trevor felt her calm down and still moved, allowing himself to orgasm when he was certain that she was taken care of. What he did not expect was for her to climax again, as he slammed into her and filled her to the hilt.

She felt him explode inside of her and arched her back once again, her nails digging into the skin of his back. It felt as if she was floating and could not come down.

He pressed his lips to her ear and whispered, in a low and husky voice "cum for me baby, and scream"

Bullseye. Her back arched even more and she let out a loud and piercing scream of his name as she came undone again. Her orgasm hitting her with brut force, making her gasp as she milked him. She was absolutely breathless and the sheen of sweat that covered her olive toned skin was enough to show that she had an intense workout.

Trevor spilled everything he had into her and groaned out her name as he came down from his high.

Both of them stilled, smiling at each other as they basked in the aftermath of their love making. He was still inside of her as their lips met in soft passion filled kisses. Her left hand moved to the back of his head, holding him in place while her right hand wrapped around his back. Trevor's left hand drew circles on her hip, while he kept his weight up on his right arm.

It was as if they were in their own little bubble of love and passion, neither of them caring about the world outside nor the people downstairs.

That little bubble was popped when they heard a gasp coming from their bedroom door. They broke their intimate kiss and turned to find none other than a very shocked and pissed Mary and a crying Liza.

Trevor moved to cover Olivia instantly seeing Thomas hovering behind his mother. He pulled out of her and she let out an unintentional moan, before slapping her hand over her mouth.

Mary felt her eyes well up as she looked at her son, completely naked and on top of a very naked Olivia. She shook her head at the flushed pair "what the fuck is all of this?!" she spat.

**... **

**_A/N_**

**_So I know this is a bit of a cliffhanger but the next chapter will be up soon._**

**_Don't forget to vote and comment, let me know what you guys think of Mary's reaction and how you think things are going to turn out for Liv and Trev._**

**_I love you all._**

**_-Karrrm._**


	27. Chapter 27

**Everything.**

Trevor turned to his mother and sighed "can you three give us a minute to get decent, then we will explain everything."

Mary scoffed "this better be a damn good explanation because this is completely unacceptable and disgusting."

He watched as they stormed out of the room and let out a sigh, before looking down at Olivia, who had silent tears rolling down her cheeks "hey, don't cry. It's going to be okay"

She shook her head "no it won't, your mother hates me. Seeing us like this made it all worse, and now she's going to find out that you got married behind her back. I don't want to be the reason you and your mother drift apart."

"Liv, listen to me" he kissed her forehead "I am a grown man and I can make my own decisions, I love you and I don't regret marrying you. We have a great life together and I know things are going to get better when we move back to New York and when our little ones arrive."

He placed a finger to her lips when she tried to say something "don't try to change my mind. Hiding our marriage and our baby was a mistake and we both knew that we would get caught out eventually. So let's get dressed and head down, and then both you and I are going to come clean and what they decide after that is not our problem."

"What if your mother leaves?" she asked.

He shrugged "I love my mother, but I cannot and will not stand you down for her or anybody else. When we got married, I made a promise to love, cherish and protect you, and I am going to keep that promise."

She smiled up at, giving him a soft kiss "I love you so much baby, and nothing they say or do will change that."

Olivia sat down beside Trevor and let out a sigh when she saw the scowls of Mary and Liza burning into her.

Trevor took hold of her hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. He let out a sigh "mom I know you are disappointed, confused and angry right now, but I need for you to see this from my side. I love Olivia, she's the one for me and I know it, I don't need you to fix me up when I have the woman of my dreams sitting right here beside me."

Marry shook her head "you know her for a year, how the hell are you so sure that this... Thing, is the one for you?"

"Mom stop calling her a thing!" he pipped up "I know this is hard for you to understand but Liv and I have been through so much over the last year. Both of us fought some heavy battles and learned to be each others strength. I don't see myself going through life with any other woman, living with any other woman. She is it for me."

Liza let out a strangled sob "so everything we shared meant nothing to you... I thought you loved me"

Trevor turned to her and let out a breath "Liza I am sorry but what we had ended the day you left me at the altar looking like a fool. I made my choice and I'm extremely happy with her"

Olivia gave him a small smile "we never wanted you all to find out this way, we were going to sit down with you all and tell you everything on Christmas day."

"Why would you want to ruin Christmas day with this crap?" Mary spat with tears in her eyes.

Olivia swallowed the lump in her throat "I guess we didn't think that your sons happiness was crap to you."

"Don't be a smart ass with me, you're the whore who tore this family apart!" Mary warned.

Trevor shook his head "mom, don't speak to my wife like that!"

"Wife?" Mary asked, her voice breaking.

He let out a breath before nodding "yes my wife..." he took her hand and showed them her ring "Olivia and I got married."

Mary gasped, her tears dropping from her eyes instantly "you got married and didn't even invite us, let alone ask for my blessing?!"

"It was my decision to marry her without inviting her family or mine... Just so you know it was very last minute." he explained.

Liza wiped the tears that dropped from her eyes "so you married her... What about us?"

"Liza we have been over this, you left and I moved on and met someone who I love more than any one I have ever loved before. I married her because I knew she is the one for me, it was the best decision I have ever made."

"How long have been hiding this from us?" Mary asked.

He sighed "mom-"

"HOW LONG!?" she cut him off.

Olivia turned to Mary and scowled "we have been married for six months."

Mary let out a sob "six months and you didn't even think to tell us, to even give us a hint. Who are you? Because the man I'm staring at is not my son."

"I was going to tell you about everything, but so much happened over the last six months that it just slipped my mind."

"So... Is there anything else I need to know?" she asked, trying to calm herself.

Olivia swallowed the lump in her throat before moving her hand to her bump "I am five months pregnant..."

"She's pregnant?" Liza scoffed "is that why you won't choose me, because I can't have kids?"

"No!!" Trevor spat "the reason I'm not with you is because I LOVE MY WIFE! She is the only woman I want to be with, she is the mother of my unborn babies and-" he stopped, feeling a lump arising in his throat.

Olivia saw the look that washed over his face and instantly placed her hand on his back "Trev, baby don't do that... We dealt with that, it wasn't your fault or mine"

He nodded before turning to her "I know, it just hits me sometimes when I least expect it. Everytime we go for a check up I wonder what our first baby would have looked like, would we hear his or her heartbeat and it breaks my heart."

She sniffled softly "but that's why this pregnancy means so much, seeing that second baby this morning felt as if the universe was giving us back the baby we lost."

He pulled her into his arms and kissed her forehead "I know, it's just difficult."

Mary wiped her tears "you had a baby?"

"no... I was only three months pregnant... My surgery, it wasn't because of an injury, it was an ectopic pregnancy." she whispered, silent tears rolling down her cheeks.

Trevor wiped her tears "its okay honey"

"I can't believe you lied to me, this whole time you have been keeping secrets while we mourned your death. I don't even know who you are right now, but you are definitely not Trevor Langan. Not the man I raised." she said before standing to her feet.

She turned to Thomas "can you book me a hotel room? I can't stay in this house with these liars anymore."

Olivia shook her head "Mary, you don't have to do that, It was never our intention to hurt you... Please just calm down and let us all talk this out like grown-ups."

Mary scoffed "we're pass the point of talking. I'm leaving and I never want to see either of you again" she said before stomping off to her room to get her belongings.

Liza stood to her feet "you two won't last long"

Olivia stood to her feet and scoffed "you have some nerve coming into our home and still speaking to us like that."

She turned to Olivia with a glare "I suggest you back off momma bear, before I beat those babies out of you"

"Enough!" Trevor spat, turning to Liza "you have been disrespecting my wife since the night you arrived and I had enough."

Liza turned to face him a scoffed "she's the one who stole my man!"

"Trevor let it be" Olivia said with a sigh, her hand tracing circles on her midsection "you're wasting your breath."

He turned his wife and raised a brow at her, noticing the tired look that covered her face "are you okay?"

"I'm fine. Your kids are just kicking the shit out of me right now." she said with a chuckle.

Thomas moved closer to her "may I?"

She nodded before placing his hand on her bump, allowing him to feel the dull thud "I don't think I'll ever get over this."

"When did you find out that you're carrying twins" he asked, his hand still pressed gently against her bump.

"This morning" Trevor answered. He sat down beside his wife after Liza stormed upstairs to get her belongings. He kissed the side of Olivia's head "she wasn't feeling well last night because she didn't have enough iron in her system. They gave her some pills to boost her iron levels and blood pressure some what. Then we asked for an ultrasound to see that everything was fine and we were surprised to see not one but two babies on the screen."

"You must have been super excited" Thomas said with a warm smile, removing his hand from her bump.

"Anything but... I was terrified, cried all the way back home. We ran into your mother in the kitchen and I just went up to my room because I needed to process the news."

"And how are feeling now?" he asked.

She ran her hand over her little bump "happy, surprised, excited, and a whole lot of other emotions..."

Trevor placed his hand on her bump and smirked "I still can't believe this is actually happening, that four months from now we are going to have two babies."

"We haven't even thought of names or anything yet. Hell we still have to get a place back in New York so that we can set up a nursery and get whatever the babies need before they arrive." Olivia said with an excited smile.

"Just thinking about house hunting is making me tired." Trevor groaned.

Thomas smirked "well then you are in luck because I recently signed with an estate agency and I could get someone to start looking for a place for you two... When are you flying back to New York?"

"Some time in February hopefully... Then we'll have two months before the babies arrive." she gave him a small smile "I want to leave with the knowledge that my babies are healthy and maybe learn the genders before going back."

"Thomas are you coming or are you staying with them?" Mary asked with tears in her eyes as she walked down the stairs.

Olivia turned to Mary and let out a sigh "it's snowing really badly outside, please just stay the night"

Mary scoffed "what makes you think that I am going to listen to you?"

Olivia rolled her eyes "you don't have to. It was just a suggestion, but clearly drama overpowers logic"

Mary turned to her son "what do you see in this woman, other than the sex?"

He shrugged "She..." he walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her waist. One of his hands resting against her bump, he pressed a gentle kiss to the side of her head "this woman makes me feel..."

"Makes you feel what?" Mary asked with a roll of her eyes.

Liza hung back slightly as she waited for Trevor's response, wanting to hear what was going to say.

He smirked, before pulling Olivia into his embrace and pressing a gentle kiss to her lips, he pulled away and winked at her "she makes me feel Everything."


	28. Chapter 28

**Kiss And Tell.**

Mary scowled as she looked out of her window, there was way too much snow for them to leave, so she was forced to stay with her son. She took the cup of cocoa that Thomas offered her and gave him a small smile "thank you."

He nodded before throwing his arm over her shoulder "You're still pissed aren't you?"

"Yeah... I just never thought Trevor could betray me like this" she said before wiping the tear that rolled down her cheek.

Thomas sighed "mom follow me"

She followed him to the kitchen entrance and watched her oldest son who was standing in the kitchen with his wife, his hands were on either side of her body while he whispered in her ear.

Olivia let out a hearty laugh before pressing a soft kiss to her husband's lips "you are a bad man."

"Don't act like you're not enjoying it..." he smirked before kissing her again "you drive me insane."

She rolled her eyes "behave yourself! Your mother is in the next room and she already saw more than enough of us."

Trevor let out a sigh "she hates us... I can't believe that my mother really hates us."

"Don't do that" she cupped his cheek "don't beat yourself up for something that we can't control."

"What will happen when our babies are born, is their only grandparent not going to be a part of their lives?" he asked.

She pulled back at his words "only grandparent?"

"Your mother is no longer alive, that's what I meant. I know that if she was alive she would be so very proud of you and happy to see you doing so well." he explained.

She scoffed "she would have hated you and she would have called me a whore and a failure for losing your baby." she let out a sob.

Mary turned to Thomas and wiped the tears that rolled down her cheeks "why did I have to see all of that?"

"To help you realise that she is human. There's a side to Olivia that neither of us saw, the side that made Trev fall for her. Just give them a chance" he explained as they walked back to the livingroom.

Mary sat down on the sofa and let out a sigh "I just don't get why they had to lie to us."

Olivia walked over to the door and gasped when she saw Casey and Eva standing outside. She opened the door for them and tightened her robe when she felt a chill run up her spine.

Eva and Casey came in shivering and headed straight to the kitchen to get some coffee to heat them up. Olivia furrowed her eyebrows "what are you two doing out in this storm?"

"our heat died down and we can't get it up and running so we figured we would come by." Casey explained.

Olivia took over and prepared two steaming cups of coffee from both women "you guys could have gotten sick or hurt out there. Especially you Casey, you live down the street and the storm is really heavy."

"it was either coming here or taking the risk or freezing my ass off in my place." she explained.

Eva began heating up something for all three ladies to snack on "luckily Trevor installed new heating in this place, or we would be out too."

Olivia turned to him with a smirk "I would have killed him if he didn't."

"Pfft you love that man too much" Casey pipped up with a smirk "where is he anyway?"

"he and Thomas took Liza to the airport, she booked a last minute flight to Chicago... They tried to talk her out of it but crazy threatened to walk in the freezing cold." Olivia said with an eye roll.

"So I got your text... What did the doctor say?" Casey asked, hoping that changing the subject would calm her friend down.

She ran her hand over her bump "it turns out that Trevor and I won't be having one baby, but two."

"WhAt!? You're having twins?! That's amazing" Casey squealed before hugging her friend tightly.

"Could you three keep it down, some of us are trying to sleep" Mary scolded as she walked into the kitchen.

Olivia sighed "as I was saying... Yeah it's twins."

Mary pursed her lips as she moved to pour herself a glass of water "twins... I had a twin sister, she was a pain in the ass, but at the same time she was my bestfriend. They are going to be inseparable."

A small smile tugged at her lips, when she felt a kick "I think they agree with you."

She walked up to Olivia without saying a word and placed her hand to her bump, a tear rolling down her cheek when she felt the dull thud against her hand "do you really love my son?"

"With all my heart... I have never loved anyone this much before" she whispered in the most sincere tone she could muster.

Mary nodded "your babies are going to be precious... I can't wait to meet them."

"Does that mean..." she trailed off.

"What's a mind that cannot be changed..." she said before walking out of the kitchen with her glass of water in her hand.

Eva furrowed her eyebrows "what the hell just happened? She actually likes you?"

"that's a bit of a stretch. She tolerates me because she's afraid of losing her son..." she said with a chuckle.

"When did they find out about Trevor and you?" Eva asked, before handing Casey the heated food and a cup of coffee.

Olivia followed her friend to the living room and settled down on one of the sofa's "a few hours ago... It was a horrible experience to say the least."

Casey laughed "now this is a story I have to hear."

Olivia told the women all about how her and Trevor had been caught in a very compromising position. The three women were in fits of laughter by the time she finished, much to Mary's irritation.

Mary was on her way downstairs when she heard what the ladies were speaking about, she found it so disgusting that Olivia could talk about her sex life so openly. In her eyes that was something private, something you should only discuss with your partner.

Casey smirked at her friend "so they got an eyeful"

"yeah... I was mortified but thank goodness Trevor was willing to cover me. He hovered over me in such a way that they didn't see any of my privates. It was still embarrassing though."

"So no more sex until the guests leave?" Eva asked with a chuckle.

She shook her head "that's not going to happen, not when I'm this hormonal and also because my husband seems to think that I am his christmas gift."

Mary scoffed softly before back up to her head and making a phone call to Liza. She was pleased to find out that Liza could not leave because of the storm. So they were on their way back home. She had the perfect plan to get rid of Olivia now, since she was hormonal, it would make things so much easier. All she needed was to cause a rift between her and Trevor and she knew exactly how to do it.

Mary smirked "you messed with the wrong family Olivia, there's no way I'm letting you dig your claws into my son."

...

Trevor, Thomas and Liza returned home much later than they anticipated, the storm caused a number of issues along the way and they almost thought they weren't going to make it back. They stepped into the house and let out sighs of relief when they felt the heat encase their cold bodies.

Trevor walked into the living room and put Liza's suitcase down before taking hold of the note that laid on the coffee table. A smile tugging at his lips when he saw his wife's handwriting.

_Casey and Eva are staying over, their heat went out so I set them up in the spare room. If you come back with Liza, she might have to share a room with the girls or Thomas will have to take the couch._

He turned to his brother and explained their little predicament, sighing in relief when Thomas agreed to take the couch. He immediately started getting some extra blankets and pillows for his younger brother.

Once Thomas was set, Liza walked up to him with a smirk "Trevor I need your help in the kitchen for a second" she said, noticing Olivia coming downstairs.

Trevor did not see his wife coming down and followed Liza to the kitchen to see what she needed help with. He was tired of her but he could not just leave her to her own devices, she would probably break their house down. She was no good in a kitchen and he knew it.

Liza smirked before taking his hand and pushing him against the counter, she bit her lip "we're under the mistletoe, how ironic."

He pushed her back "yeah that's not gonna happen, I don't care about the mistletoe."

She pulled him back "it's bad luck to not kiss when you're under mistletoe Trevor."

He scoffed, pushing her hands off him "the only person I'm kissing is my wife. Get that into your head Liza, I don't want y-"

She cut him by pressing her lips to his, feeling his entire body tense. She forced her tongue into his mouth and let out a moan, hearing Olivia's footsteps as she entered the kitchen.

Trevor heard a gasp and pushed her off him, watching as she stumbled back a bit. He turned to see Olivia, standing in nothing but a robe, silent tears streaming down her cheeks. She felt her lower lip shake as she reached down and slipped her rings off her finger.

She placed them on the counter "you can have her if she's what you want, but don't you dare think you're going to be screwing around with me while you're with her" she whispered before storming out of the kitchen.

Trevor grabbed the rings and shrugged Liza off again before rushing after his wife, he felt his own tears welling up at just the thought of losing her. He had never seen her this pissed before and he knew it would be difficult to get her to trust him again.

Olivia slammed the bedroom door closed and locked it before he could get in, her breathing was heavy as she sat down on their bed. Her eyes were squeezed shut and she had her hand pressed firmly to her bump. She felt betrayed, broken, disgusted and a whole lot of other emotions that she could not even begin to describe. Seeing him like that, with Liza made it clear that maybe she wasn't the one for him.

Liza looked at home when she was pressed against him and she could not help but feel inferior. Her heart was shattered, she sobbed, knowing that she had just lost the man she loved with her whole heart. She loved him so damn much, but clearly it was not enough since he had to go looking for affection by another woman.

Trevor stood against the door and heard her sobs, feeling his heart shatter "Liv baby, please open up so that I can tell what really happened."

"I don't want to hear it, go to your whore!" she spat, her voice trembling as she spoke.

He laid his head against the door and sighed "Olivia I swear I didn't know she was going to kiss me, I pushed her off and I told her that I'm not interested. I only have eyes for you, you are the only woman I want and need. Baby please, just open the door" he begged.

Olivia walked up to the door and took a deep breath, leaning up against it "just leave me alone Trevor." she said softly.

He heard it, the pain and brokenness in her tone and he knew, this was the final shove. His family had been pushing her away from him since they arrived and Liza had just struck the final nerve. His tears no longer remained locked away, they rolled freely at the thought of losing his wife and babies.

He shook his head "Liv please don't do this."

She heard him sobbing and had to swallow the lump that arose in his throat "just please go away... I need time to think, I can't do that with you here." she sighed, wiping her tears "go to Liza because clearly you want her."

"I don't want her I swear, she caught me off guard with that kiss, but I pushed her off immediately. I don't want her, you are the one I want. I love you Olivia, only you."

"well you have a funny way of showing it." she whispered. She sighed "I don't want to see you Trevor. Just please go."

He sighed before sitting down against the bedroom door "I'm not going anywhere, not while I know that you are hurting. I'm staying here, even if it means I have to sit here all night, then I'll do it."


	29. Chapter 29

**Still Yours.**

**_*Smut Alert*_**

Trevor spent the entire night sitting outside of the main bedroom, he accepted the blanket his brother brought but refused to go downstairs. He needed to hear her, just to be sure that she was okay, that she was not in some sort of distress. So he stayed up all night and listened to her sobbing, wanting to do nothing more than holding her and kissing the pain away. He knew he messed up this time and had to put Liza in her place, and he was going to do it, but first he needed to speak to Olivia. To fix things and get her to calm down.

He was worried about her the entire night and simply sat there the next morning, watching his mother walk out of her bedroom. She looked over at her son and felt a massive pang of guilt surge through her when she saw his tear stained face. She saw the pain in his eyes and walked up to him, hoping to ease whatever pain he was feeling.

"Trev have you been out here all night?" she asked, watching him nod.

She sighed "What happened? Are you okay?"

He let out a strangled sob "how can I be okay when I hurt the woman I love. She's been crying all night and there was nothing I could do because I'm the one who hurt her. I promised that I would never make her cry, unless they were happy tears, but look at us now. She took her rings off, she screamed that she wanted a divorce around three o'clock this morning and also said that she's leaving for New York."

He shook his head "We lost the life we built in a matter of seconds and you're asking me if I'm okay?" he scoffed "I'll never be okay without her."

Mary sighed "give her time to calm down and then talk things through"

"I can't lose her mom. She means everything to me" he whispered.

"If she loves you as much as she says she does, then she won't just leave you like that. Give her some time to think things through." she said with a sigh.

She didn't like Olivia but she hated seeing her son hurting so she decided to put her pride aside and give him a bit of motherly advice. She knew that things had progressed to far for her to intervene, Olivia was already married to her son and carrying his babies, nothing she tried would rip them apart now. Not when something as simple as a kiss could make her son want to draw closer to Olivia, she wanted to cause a rift but she knew now that when they spoke things through, their relationship would be stronger. Much stronger.

Trevor stood to his feet and knocked on the bedroom door gently "Olivia, open up please. We need to talk"

She walked over to the door and rested her head against it "I don't want to talk to you Trevor."

"Baby please" he begged "just let me explain and if you still feel like this afterwards I'll leave you be."

"There is nothing to talk about, I saw enough" she whispered weakly.

He sighed "Liv please... Just let me in to speak to you. Baby I love you and I would never cheat on you. Please open up."

He listened to her as she turned the key and let out a breath of relief when she opened the door and allowed him to step into the room. What he didn't expect was for her to crash into his arms and start sobbing. He wrapped his arms around her shaking body and placed a series of soft kisses to her hair, feeling her fist up his t-shirt as she cried.

They stayed like that for a long time, just wrapped in each others embrace as she let it out. After a few minutes she eased out of his embrace and looked up at his tear stained face.

He cupped her cheek, using his thumbs to wipe the last tears that rolled down her red cheeks. He leaned down and placed a gentle kiss to her forehead "I swear she came onto me and I pushed her off immediately. I'm so sorry baby."

She stared up into his eyes, searching them for any sign that he was lying, but the tears that shone in his ocean blue eyes and the sincerity in his voice was enough to convince her. She nodded "I believe you..."

He leaned down and gave her a gentle kiss, cupping her cheek with one of his hands, while the other moved down to caress her bump "I love you so much Olivia Margaret Langan."

"I love you too Trevor James Langan" she whispered before easing out of their embrace.

He moved to sit down beside her on the bed "what made you change your mind?"

She shrugged "I know you well enough to know that cheating isn't your scene. If you wanted Liza you would have gone after her the night they arrived, yet instead you've been with me this whole time. Also because I can't stay mad at you for too long, not when I figured out why she kissed you."

"What do you mean? She kissed me because she thought it would lead to more, but I love you too much to hurt you" he whispered, placing a kiss to the back of her hand.

She shook her head "that's not why she kissed you..." she pursed her lips "I'm not going into the details right now because I don't want to upset you, or myself. For now I just want you to hold me and kiss the pain away, I'll deal with the situation later."

He gently pulled her into his arms and laid down with her, his lips pressing feather light kisses to hers "are you sure you can handle whatever it is on your own?"

She nodded "yes"

"okay then I trust you" he said with a warm smile before leaning down and giving her a deep, passion filled kiss.

She smirked up at him when he broke their kiss "you're trying to get me worked up, aren't you?"

He chuckled "that depends, is it working?"

She bit her lip, her arms moving to wrap around his neck "always"

He reached down into his pocket and took hold of her left hand "please promise me something." she nodded "promise you won't take these off again"

"I promise honey" she whispered, watching him slide her rings back into their rightful place, on her left hand.

She reached up and caressed his cheek, her thumb tracing his lips gently as she peered up into his blue eyes, seeing nothing but love and adoration in them. She moved one of her legs up his waist and pulled him down for a deep and intimate kiss.

Their hands did the exploring but nothing was rushed, they took their time to get each other undressed and to find each others sweet spots. Trevor's touch and kisses of her skin were as soft as the footsteps of a butterfly, leaving behind a trail of fire on her body with every single touch and kiss he left.

Soft, breathy moans filled the room as he left a number of hickeys on her chest, she returned the favour, marking him as her own. Within minutes her back was arched and her eyes were closed as he moved inside of her with slow and powerful thrusts.

Her nails dug into his back, while her legs wrapped around his waist, both of their moans filling the air as they moved together. Their mouths met instinctively, both of them wanting to be connected in every way possible.

Olivia felt as if she was being incased by a bubble of love and passion as her husband brought her close to the glorious climax only he could gift her with. Trevor's groans were heard clearly as he pushed further into his wife's breathtaking body. He loved the way she felt around him, their bodies connecting like two perfect pieces of a puzzle, yet another sign that the universe gave them.

Olivia arched into him, giving him more access into her body, feeling him move deeper and faster. Her eyes filled with tears as she moaned, he was hitting spots that she didn't even know existed. Her hips started moving a bit frantically and he knew she was close. So he reached down and allowed his thumb to start rubbing her clit in rhythm with the thrusts of their hips.

"Fuck!!" she cried out in pleasure.

Trevor smirked before leaning down and kissing her breast, taking one of her gorgeous pink buds into his mouth. Their thrusts began speeding up and soon the sound of their bed hitting the wall could be heard. They changed positions, her on top of him, riding him hard and fast, both of them already one climax in. A sheen of sweat covered their bodies as their lips fused together, their tongues fighting for dominance.

Olivia tore her lips from his threw her head back, a loud moan escaping her throat when his fingers fondled with her oversensitive clit. She felt him swell up inside of her, getting harder with every delicious moan that escaped her. She was so close, but she needed more, she wanted more.

"Trev... I need" she moaned out, unable to complete her sentence.

He knew exactly what she wanted and gently moved them before pulling out and entering her from behind, her back was pressed up against his chest as she let out a scream of pleasure. Her groans increased when he used one of his hands to massage her clit while the other kneeded her breast.

Her hips rolled back against his, and her free hand fisted up the bed sheets, while the other moved behind her to hold him close, his lips kissing the skin of her neck. She let out a squeal when he hit a sensitive spot, feeling her body start to tingle on the inside.

He felt her body tighten around his erected cock and knew she was close, so he nibbled on her earlobe before whispering, in a low and husky voice "cum for me baby, and scream!"

Her back arched and she let out a scream of his name, as her orgasm encased her entire body, her eyes squeezed shut.

Trevor groaned loudly into her neck when he felt her walls convulsing around him, milking him as she came long and hard. He finished off with her, his hot seed spilling into her and coating her walls. Her chest was rising and falling rapidly as some of their release squirted out of her, dripping onto her thighs.

Their hips rolled together, slowly, bringing them down from their highs before coming to a complete stop. What Trevor didn't expect was for her to pull away from him, letting a moan when he left her body and turn back around to face him, before taking hold of his manhood and allowing him to enter her again. She let out a soft moan before lying down beside him, her leg over his waist and his member buried deep inside of her.

"that was incredible" he whispered, slowly running his hands up and down her back.

She moved her head and pressed a soft kiss to his lips "it was. I just need to feel you for a bit longer"

He moved his hand down to caress her bump and gave her a warm smile "take as long as you need babe, I love being inside of you and being with you."

She placed her hand above his, feeling a gentle kick against their hands, followed by another one "I think they are happy that we sorted things out"

He chuckled before giving her worried look "you didn't have any issues last night, did you?"

"They wouldn't stop moving and kicking. At one point I wanted to let you in because I was bent over in pain, but it stopped after a minute or two so I didn't bother." she whispered before nuzzling into his neck.

He sighed softly "I'm so sorry that you had to go through that babe I really am. Next time, let me help you."

"Of course honey, I promise if I have any pain and issues I'll let you know." she gave him a soft peck "you are my husband after all."

"You're still my girl, no matter what?"

She clasped their hands together "I'm yours, still yours and always yours. I love you"

"I love you too" he cupped her cheek with his free hand and gave her a deep kiss, feeling the stirrings of another round spiking up in both of them.

* * *

**_A/N_**

**_After much thought I decided that I was going to continue this book and I no longer care what the haters think. If you don't like where this book is going, or what I have decided to write then you don't have to read it._**

**_I was put off by the emails I received and a lot of your good reviews helped me realise that even though some people are being mean and disgusting, there are still many others who do enjoy my work._**

**_So I'll continue to write this story, not only because I feel I can't leave it incomplete but also because I feel my readers deserve a good ending... (which is still far away with this book)_**

**_To those of you who left encouraging reviews, thank you so much for inspiring and supporting me, and for being the reason that I will continue to write this book. _**

**_So this was just a bit of a filler, but things will pick up in the next few chapters. I hope you all enjoyed this. _**

**_Reviews are life. _**

**_-Karrrm._**


	30. Chapter 30

**Confront.**

Mary smiled when her son finally came out of the main bedroom and gave her a bright smile "I take it you two are okay"

He nodded "yeah, Liv is on her way down, she's just finishing up in shower. Things are looking up"

"And the babies? How are they?" she asked almost nervously.

Olivia walked down the stairs, catching Mary's question "they are perfectly fine... They've been kicking and moving around a lot more, although I'm a bit irritated by the fact that I have to wait so long to see them."

She let out a soft chuckle "yeah, I was just as irritated with the waiting during my pregnancies, I could not wait to see them and hold them."

She nodded "yeah that's exactly how I feel, amongst other emotions..." she pursed her lips "Mary will you join me for a walk, we need to talk, alone"

She nodded, shuffling nervously "sure, what do you want to talk about?"

"Everything" she said before giving Trevor a kiss and leading his mother out of the house.

Trevor turned to Casey who was seated on the sofa and sighed "this can't be good."

"It has to be done. Your mother is acting all sweet and understanding now, yet she was the one who told Liza to kiss you. I heard her on the phone when I went to bed last night and I texted Olivia before I went to sleep, but she didn't read the text until this morning." Casey explained.

A deep frown covered Trevor's features "so she wanted to tear us apart?"

Eva sighed "unfortunately yes... But I'm sure she realises how wrong she was now."

"I swear if she lays a finger on Olivia or our babies, I will kill her." he spat before storming up the stairs to get his phone. He wanted to text Olivia and tell her to be careful because he knew now, as much as his mother was a loving person, she could also be horrible and conniving.

...

Mary pursed her lips "so what is it that you wanted to tell me?"

"I know you told Liza to kiss Trevor last night, you timed me perfectly and waited until I went downstairs." she said with a scowl "why?"

She sighed "It was a foolish try at tearing you two apart. I do regret it though, seeing Trevor so broken this morning was the wake up call that I needed, he loves you, more than I have ever seen before."

She sat down on a nearby bench at one of the parks and ran her hand over her little bump "When we left New York, he told me all about you. How you were this strong, loving and caring person, who he adored. He told me that you were his team, his go to person whenever life hit to hard, that he could trust you with anything. He told me about Keith, and how you all fought back, and even about Tiffany and how you comforted him every year after her death."

She looked up at the older woman and let out a heavy breath "I don't see any of those traits in you right now, all I see is a bitter woman who is trying to ruin her son's happiness because she can't find her own."

"Watch your tone" Mary warned with a scowl.

"No you watch your tone." Olivia shot back before shaking her head "I don't want to fight, I don't have the energy or the strength for an argument. I just want to speak and let you know, that if you don't stop meddling you are going to lose your son. Trevor won't leave me, you and I both know that, and he won't stand his wife and babies off for you when you are the one in the wrong."

"So you want to take my son away from me?" she asked softly.

"That is on you. You are pushing him away by treating his family like crap, and it's not fair. I just want to know why you are doing all of this?"

Mary sighed, feeling her eyes well up "because you stole him from me!"

"What? That doesn't even make sense" she defended.

"My boy was taken from me, I thought he died, I didn't even get to say goodbye to him properly and then I had to learn to live without another one of my kids. Then I found out he is alive and all I wanted was to piece things together, fix all the pain he felt. So I figured maybe getting him a wife who could look after his needs, be there for him and make him happy would help."

"He has a wife, and I do take care of his needs and make him happy" she explained.

"I'm talking about more than just his needs in the bedroom" she said with a scowl.

Olivia rolled her eyes "of course you would say that. Look I know this is hard for you to accept, one minute Trevor was single and then you heard that he was murdered and now he's alive and married. I know it's a lot to take in but this is how things are now and you need to learn to adapt."

"Learn to adapt!?" she shot Olivia an incredulous glare "I need to learn to adapt! You stole my son and now you've dug your claws so deep into him that he cannot even see how wrong this all is. Trevor was all I had, Tiffany killed herself and Thomas left, Trevor stayed with me, he took care of me and now you stole him from me! YOU WH-" she spat.

"Mom stop!" Trevor shouted firmly as he walked over to them "this has to stop right now or you have to leave. I can't do this anymore, it's Christmas and I want to spend this time with joy and celebrations, not constant arguments. Olivia and I are celebrating our first Christmas as a married couple and it's supposed to be special, but instead it's been nothing short of crap."

Mary looked up at her son, seeing how angry he was "Trev I just want my son back... I miss you and I feel like you never have time for me anymore. You hardly speak to me lately, you were the one person I could lean on no matter what and now you're replacing me with Olivia."

He sighed "I don't speak to you because whenever I try to all you do is disrespect and degrade my wife. I don't know where all of this crap is coming from but this isn't how I know you, I could tell you everything at first without feeling judged, yet now I can't say two words to you without hearing about Liza and all this other shit. I'm tired of fighting you mom"

Olivia sighed "I'm tired too, tired of trying to prove myself to someone who already made up their mind about me. I can't do this anymore"

She stood to her feet and walked up to Trevor, leaning up to press a kiss to his lips "I'm going to head home, it's getting chilly out here and I still have to go shopping with the girls."

He cupped her cheek and gave her a few soft kisses "have fun, I'll see you later"

"mm, I'll see you later" she mumbled against his lips before walking off.

Mary sighed "will you just sit with me and tell me what happened over this last year?"

He shook his head and sat down beside her, in the place that was previously occupied by Olivia "I can't just sit here and act like all of this drama isn't happening mom."

"Fine, then what do you want to do?" she asked.

"I want to know what your problem is with Olivia, the real problem. I want to know the truth, why are you doing all of this? I don't know you like this mom."

She sighed before sitting back and looking up at the gorgeous scenery around them "I'm hurt Trevor, you got married without informing me, you lost a baby and got her pregnant again without saying anything, you've been in a serious relationship and you didn't even for a second think about letting me know. It feels like you shut me out of your life and now I don't know what to do to get back into it."

"You can start by not blaming all of this on Olivia. She asked me about us letting you know, she wanted to invite you and Thomas but I said no because I remember how you treated Liza when I wanted proposed to her. You delayed our wedding for a year because you kept finding little faults with everything, and I didn't want that this time around. Olivia and I had a very intimate wedding and it was perfect, she looked like a dream and I have never been happier before. Seeing her walk down the Isle on that beach was everything I could ever imagine and so much more, she took my breath away, still does."

"So you're sure she's the one?" she asked softly.

He nodded with a wistful smile on his face "I knew from the day I realised that I loved her. She was hesitant at first, afraid to be hurt and I gave her time. She didn't even know that I was in love with her until I told her some time later, it all happened so suddenly, we went from enemies to best friends and then just as suddenly she became everything I needed and wanted. She made Oregon feel like home, she makes anything feel like home."

"I felt that way with your father..." she whispered "he was my everything, I could not imagine life without him, still cry every year on our anniversary and on the date he passed. He was so much like you and Thomas, I loved him so damn much."

He gave her a tight lipped smile "you still miss him?"

"I do, I feel like half of me died with him, and then I took Keith to fill up that void but he made the hole even bigger because he made me realise what I lost. I didn't know you and Olivia shared that intensity, I just saw it as a fling that got too serious. I'm sorry son." she whispered, wiping the tears that rolled down her cheeks.

Trevor wrapped his arm around his mother "I'm sorry too mom, for shutting you out..."

She gave him a small smile "so, you're going to be a father soon... Are you excited?"

"yeah I am... I cannot wait to meet those little ones, and I'm sure they are going to be the matching image of their mother." he said with a wide smile before shaking his head "Liv and I still have to go shopping for their clothes and everything but first we want to know the genders."

"When is her next appointment?"

"The 6th of January, we are hoping to find out then."

She nodded "and when are you two returning to New York, or are you planning on staying until the little ones are born?"

"We might leave in early February or sometime before then, but Olivia wants to be cleared by her doctor first. Also we don't want to tell her squad until after the babies are born, that way there will be less drama during her last trimester."

She smirked "you are going to be an amazing father, those babies are very lucky to have you as their daddy and Olivia is lucky to be your wife. You take good care of her, even standing up for her against your own mother. Not a lot of men would do that."

"Not a lot of men are married to the woman of their dreams... I'm lucky to have her and I know our babies are going to have the best mother ever." he said with a warm smile before taking hold of his mother's hand "let's get out of the cold for a bit."

She stood to her feet and smirked up at him "to think I almost lost you... I'll try to be nicer, and not be such a bitch to her."

"Thank you mom" he kissed the side of her head "that is all I want."

...

"So Mary said that you stole him from her?" Casey asked with a chuckle.

Olivia nodded as she drank her lime and strawberry milkshake "yeah, but I'm sure they sorted things out"

"Thank god, the tension in your home was becoming unbearable. I was waiting for one of you to snap" Eva said with a sigh of relief.

Olivia chuckled "I was on the verge, but can we please change the subject already."

Casey forced a smile "I am leaving for New York after Christmas."

Olivia gasped "What? Why?"

"I miss Alex... I just need to see her even if it's only for a week or two, I have to be with her."

"awww Cas, that's so sweet. She'll be thrilled to see you" she said with a smile.

Eva scoffed playfully "phone sex not working out anymore?" she teased.

Casey hit her upside her head playfully before chuckling "Alex has thicker fingers and I can't go down on myself."

Olivia smirked "so that's what it's about, you horny little shit."

She let out a hearty laugh "you should be the last person to talk, you and Trevor go at it atleast three times a day."

"Three times a round sounds more accurate" Eva pipped up, taking a long sip of her wine.

Olivia threw her head back and laughed "can you blame me, my husband is a full course meal and I'm always hungry for another taste. Plus he knows exactly how to make me want more."

"How's the babies doing?" Eva asked.

She placed her hand on her bump and smirked "as sweet as candy. They do go insane whenever daddy speaks though, just the sound of his voice and then it's constant movement."

"And back pains? Do you get any?" Casey asked with a concerned look.

"Last night I was bent over in pain but that was because I was so upset and stressed. I've been fine since then, they are moving normally and kicking every now and then so I know they are okay."

Casey took hold of her hand "you're going to be an amazing mother and Trevor is going to be a great father. Those are some lucky little babies."

She ran her hand over her little bump and felt her eyes well up "I'd give them the whole world if I could."

* * *

**_A/N_**

**_I hope you all enjoyed this._**

**_Reviews are appreciated._**

**_-Karrrm. _**


	31. Chapter 31

**_A/N_**

**_So before I get into this chapter I would like to warn you all that it's going to be very smutty. With Olivia being pregnant and hormonal I have a lot of room to explore her and Trevor's sex life and also see a playful side of them._**

**_If you are not into sex scenes and scenes with sex toys then I don't think you should read this chapter._**

**_There will be a bit of plot in it and some light fluff, but this one is mostly sex. So you've been warned, continue at your own _****_discretion. _**

**_-Karrrm_**

* * *

**Insatiable.**

It was the morning of Christmas eve and for once the Langan household was not filled with arguments and shouting, instead everyone was cuddled in their bedrooms. They decided to have a sleep in and gratefully accepted the heat of their thick blankets and fluffy pajamas.

Olivia however, wasn't wearing fluffly pajamas, nor was she sleeping. She laid wrapped in her husband's arms, wearing nothing but his t-shirt, her eyes closed and her bottom lip stuck between her teeth as her fingers moved in and out of her slowly. Trevor was sound asleep and she woke up all hot and bothered, in desperate need of a release, so she figured she would let him get some rest and take care of herself.

Her breathing was heavy and soft moans of his name left her lips as she closed her eyes and pictured him. She had three fingers buried deep inside of her, her other hand tugging at her nipples and her back arched against her husband. She was so close, she could feel it but she needed more, just a little extra push to get her over the edge. So she took hold hold of his hand moved it down to her core, meeting hers, and pushed his thumb against her clit.

Trevor felt his wife's movements and realised exactly what she was doing, but decided to see how long she could go without waking him up. He knew he hormones were insane, making her horny at the most unreasonable times. She was insatiable over the last three days, wanting to have sex with every free minute they got. Not that he was complaining.

Olivia let out a frustrated groan when he didn't wake up and take over like she wanted him to. She was so turned on she could hardly think straight, she needed a release desperately. Her womanhood was throbbing with pleasure as she continued her ministrations on herself, pushing a fourth finger into her soak entrance. She let out a soft yelp and twisted her fingers, hitting a sweet spot inside of her.

Little did she know that her husband's eyes were now wide open as he watched bring herself closer to her climax. She arched her back and moaned, speeding up her thrusts, his name falling from her lips like soft prayers. Her free hand gripped her breast, massaging each of them until the her nipples became hard. She huffed "fuck!"

He could see that she needed a push, she was desperate for it so he threw the blankets aside and he moved his hand, pulling her fingers out of her, he took her hand into his. Feeling the wetness on her fingers and pressed his hand to the back of hers. His ring finger and middle finer was pressed up against hers as he moved so both of their fingers were inside of her. She moaned loudly, feeling them stretch her and feeling his lips covering the nipple she wasn't tugging on.

Her hips rolled into their hands and soon their fingers were replaced by his tongue and she nearly jumped off the bed when she felt electricity shooting through her. He used his fingers to spread her lips and began devouring her, his tongue moving as deep as it could and lapping at her wetness. Her hand tangled in his hair and she pushed his face further into her womanhood, feeling him deeper.

Trevor licked and sucked on clit while three fingers pistoned in and out of her, his eyes open as he watched her approach her orgasm. Her back arched and she fisted up the sheets around them, her eyes rolling as she felt her orgasm tear through her body. Trevor moved his mouth away from her, but stayed situated, his fingers moving slowly as he watched her release pour out of her.

Her legs shook around as she panted, before moaning against when he started licking up every drop she gave him. It was as if he knew she was not finished because as soon as his tongue moved back inside of her she released again. He sucked up every drop of her, seeing that some of her cum had squirted onto his wrist. He licked her clean, doing a few extra laps with his tongue to ensure she was absolutely satisfied before moving up her body.

"open your eyes" he whispered, seeing her eyes had darkened with lust.

She moaned when he took hold of her hand that was inside of her and sucked her fingers clean before doing the same with his fingers. He gripped her gently "you are so damn sexy"

A soft groan left her lips "that was so fucking hot, feeling your fingers and mine, the way you eat me out. Fuck! I love you" she said breathlessly.

He leaned down and gave her a deep kiss, both of them groaning at the taste of her on his tongue. She bucked her hips up against his "I need you."

He chuckled before trailing his kisses to her breast "these kids are really making you want sex all the time... I love it."

She let out a soft giggle "hmm, they really are. All I can think about all day is you fucking me, bending me over and making me cum."

"You're a bad woman" he whispered against her nipples.

She groaned "I should be punished."

A smirk tugged at his lips "maybe you will be."

She furrowed her brow when she watched him get up and move off the bed "what are you looking for?"

He shrugged "you will have to wait and see... Also no touching yourself, if you do I'll use those cuffs Casey bought you as a birthday gift and make you wait all day for an orgasm."

She bit her lip "or I could use the cuffs on you, make you watch while I bring myself to an orgasm. Maybe suck your dick"

He let out a groan at the thought of it "Holy shit Liv, you are such a tease" he whispered, watching her run her hand down on her body.

Her back arched as she pushed her thumb against her clit "you should hurry up, I can't wait any longer."

He found what his was looking for and moved to hover over her, making sure to keep his weight on his arms "cuffs, where are they?"

"Bedside drawer, key is in there too" she whispered, her voice dripping with arousal.

Trevor got the cuffs and placed the key on the bedside table, before moving back to her lips and giving her a long, deep kiss. He pulled away after some time and saw the brilliant blush that covered her cheeks "you're wet aren't you?"

She nodded "yes... What are you going to do about that counselor?"

He smirked before taking her and gently pulling her up, he gave her a deep kiss before pulling away "get on all fours."

She did what she was told and bit her lips when he took the fur covered cuffs and hooked her hands to the head board, she was leaning forward on her elbows and he kneeled behind her. He placed soft kisses to her lower back "are you comfortable?"

She nodded, feeling him prop a few pillows beneath her for support. She moaned softly when his fingers moved over her clit, her eyes shutting. She heard the soft sounds of a vibrator and bit her lip when he moved it against her clit, her hips bucking against his instinctively.

Trevor took the vibrator and ran it over her clit a few times, listening to her increasing pants before putting some lube on it and pushing it into her ass. A loud gasp fell from her lips as he pushed the top class, silicone vibrator into her, feeling a deep rumbling inside of her. Her moans increased as he set it a just a bit higher, causing her to move her hips.

She groaned "oh fuck Trevor... more!" she cried out.

He set the vibrator a bit higher before taking his dick, sliding into her from behind and hearing her yelp with pleasure. He pushed into her body and took hold of the vibrator with his free hand, gently moving it in and out of her, in rhythm with his thrusts.

Olivia was a mess of moans and curse words as she felt herself fast approaching the edge, he had only done this once to her before and it led to the most breathtaking orgasm she had in her life. Her hips rolled back, her eyes squeezed shut as she experienced an immense amount of pleasure.

Trevor grunted and moaned with each thrust, setting the vibrator a bit higher again as he sped up his thrusts. He was pounding into her at a rapid rate, hard, long rolls of his hips brought them both closure to their amazing orgasms.

Olivia huffed and could not even get any words out, her body was in overdrive and she was sure that she was going to die of pleasure. She bucked her hips into his, meeting him thrust for thrust, feeling him deep inside of her while he worked the vibrator in her ass. Her eyes rolled back when she felt his other hand move around her and begin to rub her clit. Loud pants left her body as the sound of their headboard hitting the wall filled the room again.

They did not care that his family may have heard them, all that mattered now was the pleasure they were feeling. Olivia screamed out and arched her back, feeling her inner walls holding the him in a vice grip.

"OH Fuck Trev!" she screamed out as she came undone.

Her release poured out of her body in torrents, squirting onto the bed, the sheets and her thighs. Her body shook violently in his arms as he released his hot seed into her, feeling himself swell and explode deep within her. Both of their breathing heavy and their bodies covered in a sheen of sweat.

Trevor pulled out of her once she came down from her high and removed the vibrator before opening the cuffs.

Olivia moved so that she was laying on her side and took hold of him, seeing her juices all over his dick. She moved Trevor's hand to her womanhood and moaned when he pushed his fingers into her while she sucked him clean.

He let out a groan as he watched her "fuck you're so sexy. I could watch you all day."

She moaned before bucking her hips into his hand "I'm not done with you yet Mr Langan, its my turn to have fun now"

He let out a soft chuckle "so you're not tired after that?"

She shook her head "like you said, you're babies are making insatiable. I want more and I want it now, but first I want to tease you."

He groaned when she pressed her lips to his, slipping her tongue into his mouth so he could taste her release. He gripped her ass, as she sat up to straddle him, a mischievous look on her face "so you mentioned something about watching me..."

He moved his hand to her clit and groaned when she hit it away "down boy... No touching allowed, just watch" she whispered.

His eyes focused on her as she pushed three fingers into herself and rubbed her clit with her thumb. Her eyes focused on his face as he let out a groan. She was so close to his dick but he knew, she was going to make him suffer.

Trevor watched her for a good few minutes, bringing herself closer to the edge and before he could not take it anymore and began touching her. She moaned loudly when he removed her hand and gently shifted them so that she could ride him.

Her body held him in a vice grip because she was already so close to yet another orgasm, she rolled her hips against his, hard and fast. Her breast jiggled about as she rode him, both of them a mess of moans and grunts.

Trevor let out a loud groan while Olivia screamed his name as they climaxed together, slowing riding out their orgasms. Once it was over she rolled off him, a satisfied smile on her lips.

She laid down beside him and moaned softly "that was incredible, I think I'm good for now."

Trevor groaned, pulling her into his arms "you are going to be the death of me, but I'll die happy."

She felt her eyes well up "you are far from dying honey... Now... I need to sleep, you wore me out."

He chuckled before placing a soft kiss her shoulder. They laid silently, basking in the aftermath of their intense workout. Neither of them had the energy to talk, so they did not say anything. It was a comfortable silence as he spooned her, her back pressed up against his chest. Both of their hands rested against her bump, rubbing soft circles on her stretched skin.

She let out a sigh after some time "I'm going to be Huge by the time we get home... I'm already huge and I'm only five months in."

"You're not huge... You are carrying two babies in there, and judging by both of our heights they are going to be big so they need all the space they can get. Plus I think you're beautiful, and breath taking, and gorgeous." he kissed her shoulder again before moving to her neck "I can't keep my hands off you because you are so perfect."

"typical guy, always thinking with your dick" she chuckled.

He feigned hurt "if I was thinking with my dick, I would say that your breast look amazing and bigger. Which to be honest they do" he smirked against her skin "I love your body, your mind, your heart. Fuck I love all of you Olivia..."

She bit her lip, wiping her eyes and sniffling softly "I love you too Trevor, all of you... Thank you baby, for taking care of me and loving me."

He moved them so that she was facing him and kissed her forehead gently "you never have to thank me for loving you."

She gave him a gentle kiss "I should take a bath and clean up a bit... I need to eat something for your kids and we have to get out of this bed before I get riled up again."

He chuckled softly "we could take a bath together, I'll wash your hair and your body, lather your beautiful bump with some of that lotion you like and then you can go downstairs and eat something while I tidy the room a bit. We made a mess last night and this morning"

She felt her cheeks flush at how sweet he was being "that sounds absolutely perfect" she bit her lip "you spoil me"

He gave her a gentle kiss "it's what you deserve baby."


	32. Chapter 32

**Back To Us.**

Olivia smirked as she looked up at Thomas who moved to sit beside her, he smirked "how are you doing?"

"I'm good, little one's have been absolute sweethearts." she said with a chuckle when they began kicking.

He let out a soft laugh when she placed his hand against her bump "they know you're talking about them... What does it feel like?"

"It feels like I'm walking around with my two humans inside of me" she chuckled, "I'm kidding, it feels amazing. The time really has gone by fast and I love feeling them move around and their little kicks."

He smirked "they are going to be really cute, I can't wait to meet them... I mean, if you'd let me..."

"Thomas of course I would let you meet them, you're their uncle." she pursed her lips "at least this way they will have some sort of family from their fathers side, other than Trevor himself."

Mary stood in the kitchen and overheard what Olivia told Thomas and could not help the wave of sadness that hit her. Not being a part of her grandchildrens lives was something she did not want, she wanted to meet them and hold them. She knew that she had to fix things in order to do so, she had to find a way to make things right between not only Trevor and her, but with Olivia too.

She turned to Eva who was busy preparing a sandwich "Do you know what Olivia likes to do for fun?"

Eva shrugged "she used to love going out to lunches and going dancing from time to time, but now that she's pregnant she doesn't always have the energy. So she prefers strolls along the beach and peaceful things like such. Why do you ask?"

She shrugged "I want to get to know her a bit better, try and see what type of person she is... All judgement aside, because I don't want to lose my son our my grandbabies." she sighed "I want to see her in a less stressful environment, see what it is about her that made my Trev so happy."

Eva gave her a small smile "ease into it, make light conversation. Help her with the Christmas cooking tonight, do little things and eventually she will let you in and allow you to see the Olivia we know."

"I'll try... Thank you Eva"

"It's no problem Mrs Langan... I know you are trying to fix things."

She nodded "I am. I just hope I did not push them too far, to a point of no return."

"Olivia has the softest heart, her ability to forgive surprises me sometimes." she said with a warm smile before going into the living room to find Olivia and Thomas sitting side by side and laughing.

Olivia looked up at her friend and shook her head "good luck with this one, he is full of crap."

Eva sat down opposite the two and furrowed her brow "what did he do this time?"

He shrugged "I just told her not to shit while giving birth."

Olivia let out a laugh and shook her head "you are disgusting. How do you put up with him?"

She shrugged "I have no idea, he irritates the crap out of me though"

Thomas feigned hurt "I'm right here ladies."

Trevor walked over to the group and leaned down, pressing a chaste kiss to the side of his wife's head "I have to go pick up a few groceries, you can hang around with these fools."

"Watch it Langan, we will turn your wife against you" Eva teased.

Olivia let out a loud laugh "that's impossible... Have fun and get me something nice, I've got some slight cravings."

"What is it you are craving for baby?" he asked with a smile before leaning down and kissing her bump.

She shrugged "Chinese and some spicy chips. Also custard for dessert"

He shook his head "your tastebuds need help."

"hey you got me knocked up so you have no right to complain." she said with a chuckle.

He pressed a kiss to her forehead "these kids are disgusting..." he chuckled lightly.

Olivia let out a hearty laugh before placing her hand on her bump "they must get that from you."

Mary leaned up against the wall and shook her head at the teasing couple "Trevor never gave me crazy cravings, just stuff like fruits and cakes. It was Thomas who turned me into a monster, I ate the most disgusting things and it tasted like heaven at the time. Their father was just as disgusted as Trevor is."

Olivia turned to Thomas and playfully scowled at him "what I'm hearing is that you're already a bad influence."

He laughed loudly "hey atleast I'm living up to my uncle title... I'm going to spoil them rotten, both of them"

"That makes two of us bro... They are going to be the happiest little babies ever, and they are going to be just as beautiful as their mother." Trevor said, leaning down to press a soft kiss to her lips.

She groaned softly "Trev... You need to go to the store"

He pulled away and caressed her cheek, ever so softly "okay I'm going, I just can't get over how much I adore you."

He walked to the door before turning back around and raising a brow at his wife "do you want to join me?"

She shrugged "sure... That way you won't buy the wrong stuff."

He took hold of her hand and pressed a kiss to her forehead "you going out just like this?"

She looked down at her at her outfit and shrugged, not finding anything wrong with her leggings and baggy sweater look. She sighed before going to grab her coat and a pair of fur boots "is this better dad?"

He chuckled softly "you looked great, I just did not want you freezing out there... Can't have my wife and babies suffering."

She rolled her eyes, he was good with words and could cheer her up at any given moment, but not only did he cheer her up, he backed every word he said with his actions. Olivia waved at Eva, Mary and Thomas before following Trevor out of the house and chuckling softly when he opened the passenger door for her, she got in and tied her seat belt, being sure to move it so that it didn't put much pressure on her bump.

Trevor let out a soft breath, enjoying the soft Christmas music that played on the radio before glancing at Olivia "you know, this is the first time you and I have been alone since my family arrived, like out of the house."

"I know. I missed spending time like this, just you, me and the kiddos." she ran her hand over her bump. "time is flying by so quickly, next week I'll be six months in and then it's only three more months and we will get to see the little ones"

A massive smile tugged at his lips "I can not believe they are almost here, it feels like it was just yesterday that you found out about your pregnancy."

She nodded her head in agreement "time really did fly by, it feels like it's only been a few days and these two are already getting so big." her hand rested protectively against her bump "I love these babies so much already. They mean everything to me Trevor, I would go to the end of the earth to protect them."

"I would do that and so much more... Go on a date with me?" he asked with a warm smile as they pulled up at the center.

She let out a hearty laugh "honey we're married, and tomorrow is Christmas, plus your family is here."

"So what. I want to send some time with you, out of the bedroom. As much as I enjoy our sex, I enjoy your company too so I want to sit down with you, away from all the drama and just hear what your thoughts are. I miss us, going out and enjoying some time together, just getting the weight of life off our shoulders." he explained before getting up and rushing over to open the door for her.

She took hold of his hand and steadied herself before following him into the centre.

They walked through the store hand in hand and got whatever it was they needed for their Christmas lunch before making their way to a pizza place because she had a sudden pizza craving. She sat down and ordered a pepperoni pizza and pickles on top. Trevor shook his head at his wife's tastes and got himself a pizza too, without the pickles.

Trevor took a sip of his juice and smirked when Olivia bit into her pizza and let out a moan of satisfaction. She closed her eyes and nodded in approval of the taste, she stopped chewing and blushed when she saw him watching her "has anyone ever told you that staring is rude?"

"I was just admiring your beauty..." he said before taking her hand and kissing the back of it "even when you're doing something as disgusting as eating pickles on pizza, I still find you absolutely gorgeous."

She chuckled "thank you honey, you are just as wonderful on the eyes." she smirked "speaking of eyes, I hope our babies have yours."

"Hey I would not mind our little one's having your beautiful brown eyes, that was the very first part of you that captured me in the first place. I remember walking through our house in North Carolina and seeing your brown eyes filled with hope, hope that we would be returning home soon."

She bit her lip, her eyes filling with tears as her mind went back to that place "I can't believe there was a time where you and I weren't together, where all I wanted was to go home. Now I can't imagine life without you, I miss New York but I can't imagine how it would be if we had to return tomorrow."

"It would be the same, just with a few additions, so instead of us returning alone and going our seperate ways, we'll return together and stay together with our little babies."

"I guess you are right... Maybe I'm just afraid of change."

He took hold of her hand and squeezed it "change is what brought you and I together, so I think that proves that change can be good. It just takes some time."

"I'm going to miss us..."

"We will still be married when we get back to New York babe. We're going to be together no matter where we are."

"I know that but I'm going to miss you being at home with me all the time, because when we get back you will be working. I won't know what to do with myself."

"What did you usually do when you were put off from work?"

She shrugged "I was hardly ever put off or sent home, but when I did go home I would drink a bit of wine, watch mindless TV and think about work. I would take some case files with me and go over them, I would eat take outs and do whatever work I could get my hands on. Once in a while I would go out with Alex, Cas and Mel but it didn't happen as much as we wanted it to happen. So I lived a very boring life away from the precinct, my job was my life and now I have no idea what I'm going to do these few months that I have to be at home."

He took hold of her and kissed the back of it "You will be perfectly fine honey, soon we'll have the babies to keep us both busy, plus I'll be working the earliest shifts I can get."

"I'm going to lose my mind, I can feel it... Just being in that big house on my own, it's going to drive me insane." she whispered almost nervously.

He squeezed her hand in a comforting manner "let's not over think it. We will figure it out when we get there, for now we have to stress about my family and finding a place before Thomas leaves."

A soft sigh left her lips "I'm going to miss this place so much, we got together here, fell pregnant and lost our baby here, got married here, and then fell pregnant again here... This place holds so much memories of you and I, and I can't help but wonder if we'll survive in New York."

"I thought about that too and I think you and I will be able to make it work. We love each other and where we live won't change that, I cared for you in North Carolina and I still care for you here. If anything the love I have for you has done nothing but grown, so I know we can do this. New York is where our life is."

"you're right... Just know that a piece of my heart will always be in Oregon." a smile tugged at her lips.

Trevor cupped her cheek, running his thumb over her defined cheek bone "a piece of my heart will always be in Oregon too and that's why I think we should come back some time in the future. We could come visit Eva and Casey and bring the kids along to show them where we got married and our special spot."

She blushed and giggled softly "I think we keep our spot to ourselves, the kids can stay with Aunt Eva while you and I go for a quick swim."

His face lit up at the thought "sounds perfect. See we're already figuring it out."

She nodded "it seems we are" she chuckled "I love you Trevor, and I'm glad we got this time to speak to each other, without the drama dominating our conversation. It felt like old times, where we'd go on dates and just talk for hours, I miss that."

"I miss it too babe, our little romantic dates and the time we'd spend together just talking and laughing. We're getting back on track though, and I'm sure we'll become even more close when my family leaves."

She sighed "I don't want what we have to hidden from them anymore, I just want us to be us infront of them. I miss you teasing me infront of the girls or kissing me just because you can. There was a time where you couldn't keep your hands off me and now it feels like you only touch me when you think something is wrong, or when I look sad. I want us back, my playful and fun husband who found me irresistible and not just in a sexual way."

"I still find you irresistible babe, it takes everything in me to not kiss and touch you all day. The only reason I toned it down was because I knew my family is around and I thought you would be uncomfortable. Now that I know how you feel though I won't do it anymore, I would kiss you all day if I could. Even talking to you all is a dream because I love everything about you." he said before leaning over and pressing a very passion filled kiss to her lips.

Olivia pulled away with a gasp after a while and felt her cheeks heating up, knowing that they were probably a deep shade of red. She had a massive smile on her face "I love you too"

She let out a soft giggle when she felt the little ones flutter inside of her and kick ever so softly "they love you too."

He scooted closer to her and felt the little kicks of their babies "I cannot wait to meet these two, I'm counting down the days till we get to see them again and hear their heartbeats. I think that is one of my new favourite sounds, apart from you voice, your laugh, and your moans ofcourse."

She shook her head and playfully hit his chest with the back of her hand "sweet talker."

"you act like you don't like it" he teased, leaning closer to her.

She shot him a sexy wink while a mischievous smirk tugged at her lips "you know I like it, so keep talking."

...

**_A/N_**

**_I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter, let me know what y'all thought, reviews are appreciated._**

**_-Karrrm. _**


	33. Chapter 33

**Try.**

Olivia and Trevor returned home from their impromptu date a little after two hours, both of them had massive smiles on their faces as they walked into their house. She let go of his hand and made a beeline for the bathroom, finding the ability to hold her pee almost impossible.

Trevor chuckled softly as he watched her rush to the bathroom "oh honey, the things you do" he whispered to himself.

Liza finally came out of her room and walked over to him, she gave him a nervous smile "hey... Can we talk?"

"After the stunt you pulled the other night, I'm surprised you're still here" he spat.

She sighed "I deserved that... I'm sorry for what I did the other night, kissing you was wrong because I know you're happily married."

He carried the bags into the kitchen and sighed as she followed him "then why did you do it? You knew it's wrong and you still did it. Why are you doing all of this?"

"Because I care for you and I trusted your mothers judgement. The entire time we were together I had to fight for her approval and now suddenly she comes to me and tells me that she was wrong and you and I should give it another go. So I came here with her, thinking that maybe we could fix things, I didn't know that you were married and I know I've been a bitch but I did not want your mother to hate me again."

"I don't get it. You left me, for Gina. Then you show up with my family and act like everything is okay. As if you didn't leave me standing at the altar like a fool, friends and family watched as someone told me that my fiancee ran off with one of our bridesmaids. Now you're here, trying to rip my marriage apart and telling me you did it because you care." he scoffed "and you expect me to believe this sorry act."

Her eyes filled with tears as she watched him place the various groceries where they belonged "I know it seems crazy but you don't understand the depth of it all. Trevor I love you, I always have and I know that I always will, I still loved you when I ran off with Gina and I only did it because I was tired of being your mothers punching bag. Gina and I broke up because I could not get over you, she knew she would always be second best compared to you and she could not take it. So she left me, and I knew I made the biggest mistake of my life."

She stopped briefly, sniffling "When I found out that you were dead, I nearly lost it because I thought I would never see you again and then your mom showed up. She told me all about what happened and you being put in witness protection with a female detective. I agreed to come because I thought I could win you back, but I knew in the back of my mind that the said detective may have already made her move on you."

He sighed "so you agreed to be a bitch and make her life hell, in the hopes that she would leave?"

She shook her head "no. We never had a problem with her, your mom told me that she was beautiful and she saw her in hospital on facetime. Hurting Olivia was never in the plan, I just got really jealous when I walked in here and saw the cute pictures of you two up all over the house. Then I saw her and she was absolutely gorgeous, I knew I didn't stand a chance at getting to you if she was around so I figured being a bitch to her would get her to leave. Your mom fell in with that when she saw the way you looked at her and covered for her."

Trevor ran his hand through his hair that had grown out a bit and sighed, he shook his head "surely you must have known being a bitch to my wife would not make me want to be with you."

"I didn't know that you two were married at the time, I thought you were dating. I knew that some of the photos were made with photoshop but I did not expect the big wedding portrait to be real. I saw you two kissing in the kitchen one night and I saw her pulling you close and I knew I would have to up my game. That's why I wanted to leave when I found out that you were married, it had gone too far and I knew I lost. She married you and she's carrying your babies, that is something I can't do, so I wanted to leave without a fight. Then your mother called me and told me that Olivia married you for your money and we had to rip you two apart before she takes everything you have and leaves you. That's why I did it, I thought I was protecting you, but seeing you like that, crying because you were about to lose the woman you love was enough to make me realise that you moved on."

He looked over at his wife who was standing in the kitchen doorway with tears in her eyes "hey..."

She forced a smile "hey, sorry for eavesdropping. I wanted to grab a snack when I heard you two speaking. So I figured I'd wait but my jealousy got the best of me and I wanted to be sure that you two weren't hooking up behind my back. Sorry for not trusting you."

He shrugged "there is no need to apologise, the last time you walked into this kitchen Liza kissed me so I get why you wanted to know."

Olivia forced a smile and saw the tears that rolled down Liza's cheeks "I get why you did it Liza... I loved someone that is married too, he was everything to me at one time and I was willing to rip a family apart to get what I wanted. I didn't do it though, because I knew, even though he cared for me, I would always be second best to him. Then Trevor and I got stuck in this mess and I tried to fight what I felt for him, for the longest time."

"But you did not leave him at the altar" Liza whispered "you didn't give up on the man you love because you were scared."

"I almost did, I almost walked out on him because I was terrified of the fact that I fell in love with him so quickly. I knew he was the one I loved but I nearly made a mistake and left him for someone who would have left me to go back to his wife. Then I realised how happy I had been with Trevor and I knew I could not just let that go so I fixed things and now he is the only man I ever want to be with."

Trevor gave his wife a warm smile before turning to Liza "Liza I know this hurts but you and I had our chance. What we had was good, I thought I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you but after meeting Olivia I knew I would have messed up what we could have had to be with her. I loved you, at that time you were the love of my life, but now I love Olivia, I'm in love with Olivia and I don't want anybody else. She is my everything and I am actually glad that you left me because if you didn't I wouldn't be married to her today."

She let out a soft sigh and closed her eyes "I'm happy for you Trevor, you found your one, but it still hurts and I know it's going to for the longest time. I just hope both of you could forgive me"

Olivia pursed her lips "it's going to take a little time for me to get over all of this, but I am willing to try if you promise that you won't try to mess us up again."

She nodded "I promise, I really do want to fix things."

"So do I" Mary said, stepping into the kitchen, having heard their entire conversation.

Olivia turned to the older woman and sighed "what changed?"

She shrugged "everything. He loves you, more than I ever seen my boy love before and I know he is capable of making the right choices. I don't know you very well but I trust that he made this decision because he knows you and trusts you, and that is enough for me."

"And you're not just saying that because you're afraid to lose Trevor?" Olivia asked.

She shook her head "no. I'm saying it because I mean it. You are a part of my family now and you are carrying my grandkids, that makes you as important to me as Trevor is. I don't want to miss out on the opportunity to know these babies and I don't want to lose my boy again, but more so I want to get to know our new member. From what I've heard from Trevor, Thomas and your friends, you are a good person and I want to see that. I lost my baby girl years ago and even though you will never take her place, it will be nice to have another female in the family."

Trevor walked over to Olivia and wrapped his arms around her "are you willing to give this a try?"

"for you. I would give anything a try" she whispered before leaning up to kiss him.

...

Trevor came downstairs with a flushed cheeks when he saw the looks on their faces "I'm sorry that you guys heard all of that" he said shyly.

Thomas chuckled "we have been hearing you two have sex since the day we arrived, and I thought we'd be used to it but wow you two got a bit loud up there."

He felt his face turn a deep shade of red as his mother, Liza, Casey and Eva stared up at him "look I'm sorry... We just tend to forget to control ourselves in the moment."

Mary laughed at her sons embarrassed expression "oh darling there is no need to explain yourself, not to me atleast. Olivia is pregnant and I know what hormones does to a person, I'm actually surprised at how little you two do. I was way worse and it's not something to be embarrassed about, sex is great and you are married so you can do it whenever you want."

He shuffled awkwardly "mom it's kind of weird talking to you about my sex life."

"Honey I literally walked in on you and Olivia, I've seen over enough of the both of you so I don't get why you're so shy." she chuckled "in fact we've all seen more than enough of you two, except Eva and Casey of course."

Casey smirked "actually Eva and I have seen all of them. Like a few months ago, I think it was after the wedding we wanted to go out."

Eva laughed at the memory "oh yeah, I remember that. Casey, Alex and I were going to the spa in town for a little girls day and we tried calling Liv. She didn't answer her phone for all twelve of our calls and so we thought we'd come by and fetch her."

"So we came over from my place and before we could knock we heard something fall and break, and immediately all of us became worried and busted the door open" Casey explained.

Thomas furrowed his brow "then what happened?"

"We walked in to find Trevor and Olivia, up against that wall, her leg around his waist. Fucking up a storm." Casey said before bursting out into loud laughter.

Eva nodded "we saw everything and I mean everything. Every thrust of his hips, all of it."

"And what did you and Olivia do?" Liza asked with a chuckle.

Trevor sighed "she dropped her leg and I pulled out of her before rushing into the bathroom because it the closest room and grabbing our robes."

"Then Alex suggested that we leave them be and reschedule a girls day when they're not that busy" Casey said.

"and Olivia popped her head out of the bathroom, letting us know that she liked that idea and that we should lock the door on our way out." Eva finished off.

Mary shook her head "Trevor Langan I did not raise you to have sex with your wife up against your living room wall."

He chuckled softly "it was in the heat of the moment... And we only did it there once"

She shook her head "I'm afraid to wonder where else you did it."

A smirk tugged at his lips as he thought about all the places he and Olivia had made love in their house, he wasn't going to tell them, but he knew they had quite the list. His favourite was the balcony, on one of the sun loungers, underneath the stars, it was one the first places they made love after their wedding. He could not help but wonder would his wife be willing to do it again.

Thomas shook his head at his brother who seemed to have zoned out and threw one of the small sofa cushions at him "snap out of it dumbass. Casey asked you a question."

He turned to Casey "sorry I didn't hear you."

She shrugged "it's cool. Where is Liv?"

"She is sound asleep... I guess I wore her out." he teased.

Mary scoffed "she's six months along right?"

"Almost six months..."

"Yeah wait until she gets to six months and then you won't be singing that tune, you'll be saying that she's wearing you out." she chuckled.

He shrugged "I won't mind..."

"of course he won't. Sex addict" Thomas teased.

Trevor chuckled before hitting his brother upside the head "Shut up dork, you're just pissed because you're not getting any."

"that's a low blow" he feigned hurt.

Trevor shrugged, settling down beside him "truth hurts, blue balls."

"They're bigger than yours" he shot back with a smirk.

"keep dreaming..."

"So you think because you're taller than me, your dick is bigger than mine." he asked.

"I don't think. I know." he teased before playfully tackling his younger brother.

Mary shook her head "I swear these two are still five years old."

Eva nodded "boys will be boys"

"Ain't that the truth" Casey added.

Liza chuckled softly "I think it's cute."

* * *

**_A/N_**

**_Hey readers. :-)_**

**_I know it's been forever since I've updated and I do apologise for my lack of chapters._** **_This is just a bit of a filler, and things are going to pick up over the next few chapters._**

**_Unfortunately I won't be doing a Christmas scene, and there will be a time skip coming in the next few chapters._**

**_I hope you all enjoyed this little chapter. Reviews are life._**

**_Until next time, keep reading._**

**_-Karrrm. _**


	34. Chapter 34

**Family.**

Christmas morning came rolling in faster than the Langan household had expected it, the snowy weather outside made that each of them decided to stay in bed for a little while longer. They cuddled up beneath thick blankets in search of heat that and comfort, as they lay asleep in their various bedrooms.

Eva and Casey returned to Eva's home the previous evening after Trevor and Thomas managed to fix the heating at one of their homes. Casey's home was still a frozen palace however, as her heating needed some professional fixing. Both women enjoyed their little sleepover and had way too much to drink, which led to them calling Olivia up at the most impossible hours of the morning.

Olivia currently laid safely in the arms of her husband, both of their hands clutched against her growing baby bump. A smile was glued to her face as she slept peacefully, her brunette hair tied up while her husband's face cradled into her neck. She has become so accustomed to having him beside her that she often wondered if she'd be able to sleep without the feel of his embrace.

Trevor however, was not asleep. His ocean blue eyes were wide open and he had a smile on his lips as he laid silently and felt the gentle flutters of both babies. A series of soft kicks were pressed against his hands and he could not help but wonder whether they were having a little kicking contest inside of their mothers womb. He gently ran his fingers over her naked skin, feeling the light flutters of their babies had become his new favourite thing to do.

He was a lucky man, and he knew it. Not only did he get the opportunity to be in a relationship with Olivia, but he also got to marry her. He knew that a number of men would kill to have her at their side and he was thankful that she had chosen him. In the space of a year their lives had drastically changed, they fell in love, almost had a baby, healed from it, and now they were married and expecting two little ones.

He pressed a soft kiss to her shoulder before slowly moving out of the bed, being as gentle as possible, in order not to wake her up.

Olivia rolled over and scrunched up her face before relaxing back into the pillows and pulling the blankets tighter around her. He had to fight to bite back a chuckle, she always scrunched up her face or pouted in her sleep, and he found it absolutely adorable.

He slipped out of the bed and went into the bathroom, running a bath for them to share. He filled the tub with her favourite bath salts and closed the blinds before lighting a few candles. A smile tugging at his lips as he rushed downstairs to get some juice and chocolates, it was not as romantic as champagne but it would have to do for now. He got what he needed and rushed back up to the main bedroom, he headed for the bathroom once again and placed the juice along with two glasses beside the tub.

Trevor went back into the bedroom and sat down beside his wife, gently nudging her so that she would wake up. He sighed softly when she let out a groan and continued sleeping, before leaning down to press a kiss to her lips, in the hopes that it would wake her.

He gave a soft kiss, his lips dancing across hers in the most gentle way possible, a smile tugging at his lips when she kissed him back. He pulled away all too soon for her liking and chuckled at her now pouted lips "good morning sleeping beauty."

She bit her lip, before smiling up at him "good morning honey... I know it's christmas, but why are you up so early?"

"Because I thought I'd give you a little surprise, but you need to get out of bed for that to happen" he explained, pressing a gentle kiss to the side of her head.

"I thought you would surprise me with some great morning sex" she teased.

He let out a hearty laugh "get your head out of the gutter woman."

She smirked "you should of thought about that before getting me knocked up..."

"I like your hormones" he joked.

She got out of the bed and shivered lightly "you won't be saying that when the hormones turns me into a very pissed off person."

"come on, let's get you heated up." he said taking hold of her hands. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to her lips "let's go before the water runs cold."

She followed him into the bathroom and smiled happily when she saw his little set up "Trev, this is beautiful. Thank you."

He pressed a kiss to the side of her head "it's the least I could do... We've had a stressful week and it was mostly because of my family, so I decided to spoil you a bit..."

She stepped into the welcoming water, with his help and relaxed back into his embrace, one of her hands running gently over the stretched skin of her midsection. She let out a contented sigh and thanked him as he handed her a glass of juice "this is perfect... I can't remember the last time we spent a morning like this, just relaxing."

"It was exactly three weeks ago if I remember correctly... We had a little picnic in the living room because you decided that you didn't wanna leave the house at the last minute." he said with a chuckle.

She laughed softly at the memory "but we had fun, and it ended up in some great sex and an amazing body massage from you."

"I could give you another one later if you want?" he offered, pressing a kiss to the side of her head.

She nodded "that would be lovely"

The couple spent the next few minutes just unwinding and speaking about how challenging the last week had been. They enjoyed the moments of peace they had, laughing and feeding each other chocolates as they relaxed in the tub. Eventually the water ran cold and Olivia went into the bedroom while Trevor pulled the plug and let the water run out. He followed his wife into the bedroom and sat down beside her before handing her a little black box.

Olivia looked down at the box and opened it, a loud gasp leaving her lips when she saw the gorgeous little locket necklace. She opened the locket and felt her eyes filling up with tears immediately as she looked at the two little pictures.

She ran her fingers over the little pictures and looked up at her smiling husband "Trevor this is beautiful... Thank you" she whispered.

He took her hand and kissed the back of it "you're welcome baby... Merry Christmas"

She sniffled softly "this is so cute." she looked down at the pictures and chuckled "what made you think of this?"

He looked down at the locket and smiled as she looked at the two ultrasound pictures in the locket "well I figured even though your first pregnancy was ectopic and we didn't get the chance to have that precious little one, it still deserved a spot beside these two little ones. I know it hurts to think about it sometimes, but I can't ignore the fact that you had our baby growing inside of you and now life gave us a second chance with not one, but two babies."

He reached over to her and wiped the tear that rolled down her cheek "so I figured the best way to remember our first baby, and celebrate these two little ones would be to have their ultra sound pictures hanging around your neck, above your heart."

She sniffled softly "thank you so much baby, I just know that you are going to be the best father in the world. I love the gift, and I love you."

He leaned over and pressed a soft kiss to her lips, both of them savouring the moment. Their little intimate bubble was burst when they heard a knock on the bedroom door. Trevor rolled his eyes at the closed door before going back to kissing his beautiful wife, who welcomed each kiss.

Olivia settled onto his lap, straddling him as they kissed each other with a deep, burning passion. She moaned softly into the kiss as she cupped his cheeks and his hands caressed her little bump.

They pulled apart with a start when they heard the bedroom door open up, both of them turning to face Liza who was blushing profusely. Olivia cleared her throat "uhm... Liza did you need anything?"

She nodded "yeah, I'm sorry for bothering you two... But uhm, your mom has gone into extreme Christmas mode and asked that we all head down to help with a special Christmas breakfast."

Trevor sighed "she's gonna send you up here a hundred times if we don't come down right..."

"Yeah" she chuckled.

Olivia sighed and walked over to her drawers "we'll be down in a minute, we just have to get dressed."

"Okay, sorry again, for barging in on..." she trailed off.

A smirk tugged at Olivia's lips "it's okay, we weren't having sex, just stealing a few kisses."

Trevor smirked and walked over to Olivia, pressing a kiss to the side of her head "there is no need to explain honey..."

Liza forced a smile "I'll let your mother know."

She walked out of the room and sighed as she made her way downstairs, a few tears dropping from her eyes. She wiped them before going into the kitchen where Mary was busy "they'll be down in a minute, they are just getting changed."

"Okay no problem" she said before turning to look at Liza "you've been crying... What's wrong?"

She shrugged "it's just a bit difficult to get used to all of this, I love Trevor, I really do, but he has a wife now and he loves her. I can see it, he loves her so damn much, I just didn't expect it to hurt me this much."

"It will take some time but you will get over it... Eventually." Mary said as she placed a comforting hand on Liza's arm.

Trevor rushed into the kitchen and cleared his throat "I'm going to take Olivia to the doctor, she's not feeling well."

"What's wrong?" Mary asked with a frown.

Olivia came down and huffed, her eyes filled with tears "Trev" she sobbed out. Her hand was pressed to her bump as she gripped the counter.

Trevor turned to her and gently picked her up, carrying her to the front door "It's okay babe, just calm down."

"It's too early" she cried out, holding onto him with a death grip.

...

Mary, Thomas, Eva, Casey and Liza all sat in the waiting room nervously awaiting news of what happened to Olivia. She was fine one minute, and the next she felt a sharp pain and then just as suddenly it became unbearable.

Trevor had been in the room with his wife the entire time and had not given them any information on her condition.

Mary sighed "what's taking them so long?"

Eva sighed "she can't lose those babies. She won't survive losing their babies, not after losing their first baby and after getting this far."

"It's going to kill her" Casey sniffled "it's going to kill both of them, because they love those little ones already."

"How did they get through this the first time?" Thomas asked almost nervously, his own eyes filled with tears.

Casey scoffed "Olivia was a shell of the woman we knew, she cut herself off from everybody. We didn't see her in what like forever, Trevor was a mess. They were both so broken and I know that they won't survive that again."

Eva nodded "we were all so broken, seeing her go into that surgery room was the worst thing. She hardly spoke for a week."

Mary shook her head and wiped the tears that rolled down her cheeks "I've just started fixing things with Olivia and I don't want her to lose those little ones. Those babies are going to be so precious and so very loved, they have to survive this."

...

Olivia opened her eyes and let out a groan, she felt as if she had been hit by a truck. Her hand moved down to her bump instinctively and a smile tugged at her lips as she listened to the heartbeats of their babies ringing out in the room.

She looked over at Trevor who was asleep, she ran her hands through his hair and smiled "you two needn't make your daddy and I stress like that."

Trevor stirred slowly his eyes focusing on his wife "please never do that to me again." he said before moving over to kiss her.

She broke their kiss and gave him a sheepish smile "did they tell you what actually happened?"

"Turns out all this stress did get to you, Doctor Aines said that your blood pressure was high and it caused you to go into early labour. They managed to stop it however and as you can see, both babies are okay now."

She looked over at the monitor in the room and smiled as she watched her babies, her doctor had set up a machine to monitor their heartbeats and see that they were okay. She felt her eyes welling up as she looked at both babies, a soft chuckle escaping her lips "are they sucking their thumbs?"

Trevor nodded and chuckled "yes they are, they seem to be enjoying themselves."

She looked up him and bit her lip "where is the rest of the gang?"

"They are in the waiting room, should I go and call them?" he asked.

Olivia shrugged "yeah... I'm sure your mother wants to see her grandkids."

He nodded before taking her hand "I'll go get them, but first... How are you feeling beautiful?"

"Tired, like I've been hit by a truck, but now that I know they are both okay I'm much better." she smiled, closing her eyes for a minute "it's Christmas and we're stuck in hospital. Not how I wanted to spend our first Christmas as a married couple."

He leaned down and kissed her forehead "hey, I don't care where we are as long as our babies and my precious wife is healthy. I love you and these little ones and as long as I still have all three of you, I don't care about anything else."

Olivia wiped the tears that rolled down her cheeks "you know, I'm a really lucky lady. You're a terrific husband, I love you."

"I love you too baby" he pressed a chaste kiss to her lips "I'm going to get the rest of the group."

"okay, I'll be here watching these little buggers suck their thumbs." she said with a soft laugh, looking at both of their of babies suckling peacefully at their thumbs.

She ran her hand over her bump slowly, and let out a giggle as they kicked "you two really had me worried, but I feel like this is your way of getting us all to calm down isn't it?"

Her eyes focused on the screen and she chuckled softly as she watched them flutter about inside of her, she felt her eyes welling up and she sniffled softly "you two make me and your daddy so happy, we can't wait to see you and hold you. I can't wait to kiss your little cheeks and hear your cries, rock you both to sleep." she bit back her tears and sighed "you have the best daddy ever, he already loves you both so much... He is going to be the best parent and he will teach you both so much."

"My dad didn't teach me anything, he wasn't in my life, he was a very bad man... But your dad, is a good man, a very good man. He is the best thing that has ever happened to me, and I don't know what I did to deserve him but I will do everything to keep him because I love him. I love him so much, I don't know what I'd do without him." she whispered.

Her eyes moved over to the door where the rest of the group were coming in, she forced a smile when Mary and Liza came in first.

Mary let out a sigh of relief "you had me worried, are the little ones okay?"

She nodded "yes, so far so good. They are going to keep me here though to keep an eye on me and the babies through the night."

"they are so cute" Liza sassed as she looked at the monitor, she gasped and let out a giggle "oh my god, they're sucking their thumbs, that's so adorable."

Olivia chuckled as she looked over at the screen "they get that from me, I saw some old baby pictures and my thumb was always stuck in my mouth."

Eva, Casey, Thomas and Alex burst into the room with flowers and balloons, massive smiles on all of their faces. Alex walked up to her friend and shook her head "you bitch, you kept these precious babies a secret the whole time... I'm so pissed at you."

Olivia rolled her eyes "we wanted you all to meet them face to face, but these two clearly had other plans... When did you get here?"

"Three hours ago" she said with a smirk "also Merry Christmas sweetheart."

Olivia smirked "Merry Christmas babe... Cas do you like your gift?"

Casey gasped "Wait... You got her here?"

Alex nodded before pulling Casey close and kissing her cheek "Mr and Mrs Langan apparently have lots of pull in New York... You're going to be stuck with me for the next three weeks."

The family spoke for a little while all excited about being together and the fact that Olivia and the babies were healthy. Mary ran her hands over Olivia's bump and smiled while her tears rolled freely "I'm sorry for all of this Olivia, if I had not been such a bitch we would not have been here right now. If I just accepted you, we would have been back home, celebrating and spending time together as a family."

Olivia looked around the room and smirked, seeing Casey and Alex relaxing in one of the corners and catching up. Thomas stood with his arm around Eva's shoulder as they spoke to Liza and Trevor on the other side of the room and everyone seemed to be okay. She bit her lip before looking over at Trevor who shot a wink in her direction "we are together right now, we may not be at home but we're still a family."

"Does that mean you forgive me?" she asked softly.

She placed her hand on top of Mary's, both of them caressing her bump "I already have."

...

**_Hey readers, I hope you all enjoyed this. Let me know what y'all think about it. Reviews are life. _**


	35. Chapter 35

**Stay.**

Two months had passed and the Christmas and New Year's hype was over, and the family were just settling back into their everyday lives. Alex had decided to stay for a few more weeks, wanting to spend as much time with her girlfriend and friends as possible.

Trevor walked into the kitchen and smirked when he saw Olivia leaned up against one of the counters, her seven month bump getting bigger with each passing day. She was glowing, her olive toned skin, more vibrant than ever before and she looked like an absolute goddess. He walked up behind her and gently placed his hands on her bump, pressing a soft kiss to her wavy hair.

A smile tugged at her lips as she leaned back in his embrace, her eyes closing as both of them felt their little ones flutter inside of her. She let out a soft breath "this is my favourite feeling ever, it's their way of letting me know that they are awake."

"so sit down and enjoy that feeling for a bit more while I prepare some breakfast for us... Thomas said he found a place and would like to call us about that a bit later." he explained while moving over to the stove.

"please do me a favour and add some bacon to whatever you are making." she said before walking out of the kitchen.

He furrowed his brow before continuing with the breakfast, humming softly as his mind wondered. He could not believe how lucky he was, he married the love of his life and now they were close to welcoming both of their little ones into the world.

Olivia walked back into the kitchen and pursed her lips "honey you do know that we have a doctor's appointment today right?"

"Yeah, at 2" he answered with a small smile "are you ready to find out?"

She shrugged "I am... Although I'm a bit nervous. What do you want the genders to be?"

"I haven't really thought about it, like I would want a little girl so that you could dress her up and she would look like a princess. Then again, I also want a little boy, who I can teach all kind of things to, but either way, I will love both of them so damn much." he said with a small smile.

They finished their breakfast in a comfortable silence, feeding each other and laughing at the little corny jokes they shared. It was the first time they got to spend a morning together, without any playful bickering from Alex and Casey, or complaints from Eva who missed Thomas.

They adored their friends but they needed their time alone every now and then, just sharing each others company and being together. Olivia sat back and admired Trevor as he cleaned up their dishes, she was certain that she would never tire of seeing him. Having him close by was her favourite feelings, and she knew then, that everything in her life had led her to this moment.

She felt a sense of relief wash over her when she realised that this was not just one of those normal relationships, she was not going to lose him, she never had to fear that he would wake up and change his mind one day. She had the certainty that he adored her and loved her with all of his heart, she just knew, they were meant to be.

This was nothing like her past relationships, where she would be blissfully in love one minute and waiting for the other shoe to drop the next. Her mind wondered back to her longest relationship, three years, with Ed Tucker. She loved him, she thought he was the one she would settle down with, but life had other plans for her. He wanted something she could never see herself doing, he wanted her to walk out on her job, her life and start over with him. She was not ready at that time, because she was still in love with her job and her partner, but all of that had changed.

Her life, her focus and her thoughts had changed so much over the last year, suddenly being away from the precinct felt normal, and having someone to love felt right. Letting go was not easy, and she was certain that she would never have done it without this whole witness protection business, she would have stayed in her bubble, her lonely bubble.

Now she was happy that this entire thing took place, that she was forced out of her comfort zone and pushed into a new environment with someone different by her side. She was raw when they arrived and somehow Trevor found a way to heal her wounds, to make her feel alive, more alive than she ever felt before. Her whole life shifted, it went from being job orientated to being filled with love and family. She had a family in New York yes, but they were nothing like what she had here, in Oregon. Her life was better here, she was happier.

"What if we stay?" she asked suddenly.

Trevor turned to her with a confused look "what do you mean?"

"What if we stay here in Oregon, we can go and visit our families any time. But like, what if we live here, forever?"

A smirk tugged at his lips "Do you want to stay here?"

She shrugged "I'm not sure... I just know that I've been happier here, we are happier here. This is where our life together started and I feel that we would grow so much more here."

He nodded, a thoughtful look on his face "What about your job? Would you be okay not doing it?"

"I am a certified rape counselor, I can still help survivors here, we could figure out how to go about getting a SVU precinct to be opened here. I have enough experience to run it and you can be an ADA, extend the firm. Let Henshall run the one in New York, fly over when necessary."

He walked over to her and pressed a kiss to the side of her head "you've got this whole thing figured out... I like it."

"So does that mean you want to stay too?" she asked almost nervously.

He shrugged "Olivia I just want to be where you are. I don't care where we live as long as we are together we can make it work. If you feel Oregon is the place for us then we can stay, we can visit New York and take the kids to see the city. We can get the firm to extend and I'm sure we can get a precinct opened up this side. It really is needed here, and you will be the perfect person for the job."

She wrapped her arms around his neck "then it's settled, we're staying."

He gave her a soft kiss "yes we are... But we're still getting the place in the city, for when we decide to go over... You know so that we can have our space."

She nodded "yeah that will be perfect, the last thing I want is to be forced to live with other people. We'll have no privacy"

"Yeah and that would mean that I won't be able to ravish you every night, or just kiss you whenever I want to." He said before leaning down and brushing his lips against hers.

She giggled softly against his lips "you can kiss me whenever you want darling, I'll never say no to you."

...

"hey..." she trailed off smiling down at her phone.

Cragen's entire face lit up at the sight of her, it had been forever since he had heard her voice "Olivia..." he got slightly choked up "I miss you."

She sniffled softly, seeing his tears drop "I miss you too... Very much."

"When are you coming back, there's a lot we need to speak about" he whispered, wiping his tears "A lot of changes"

"Can I get a few examples?" she questioned, running her hand over her bump.

"Well for starters Cassidy returned to the precinct, also we have two new detectives, Amanda Rollins and Nick Amaro." he explained.

She smirked "what are they like?"

He shrugged "they are still fresh, trying to find their way around the cases. They are good cops though, always trying their best to keep on top of the game. Amanda actually reminds me of you, a real go-getter, Amaro on the other hand has a bit of anger issues."

She nodded "A younger version of Elliot then" she chuckled.

Cragen laughed softly "definitely... But you'll like them, they are a breath of fresh air."

A bitter sweet smile covered her lips "I may not be coming back... Anytime soon... Cause like, I'm happy here, happier."

"I don't blame you" he said with a smile, shocking her "I took some time away, traveled a bit. It was the best thing I could do, I enjoyed it and definitely needed it. Sometimes getting away is a good thing."

"I thought you would be more sad" she admitted with a soft laugh.

He shook his head, giving her a sweet and supportive smile "I could never be sad about you doing what is best for you... I will miss you yeah, but I would never stop you from being happy. You're glowing."

She let out a bashful laugh "I am so happy out here... With Trevor."

"Ah, there it is" he said with a chuckle "I knew something had to be brewing there because you haven't killed him yet. So are you two dating?"

She pursed her lips "I would never have the heart to kill him... I uhm... I love him."

He let out a happy sigh, a massive smile tugging at his lips "That is great kiddo, I'm glad you found someone and I trust that he is treating you well."

"he is" she nodded "we are actually going to come by soon, but in a few months time. We are trying to figure a few things out first, then we're going to fly in with a surprise or two."

He raised an eyebrow "I look forward to seeing both of you, I have to talk to Trevor for a bit. Thank him for taking care of you through all of this... Also how are you doing now? After the surgery, how is the healing coming along?"

She let out a heavy breath and felt her eyes well up "I'm better. It took time, a lot of time but I have gotten through it... Trevor was my rock through it all, after the procedure he just held me and allowed me to go through it."

"What happened?" he asked almost nervously "I know it was not just an injury because seeing you break down and cry like that told me that it was so much deeper than an injury." he explained, hoping that she would open up.

She sniffled, her eyes brimming with tears and she gently rested one of her hands on her bump "it wasn't just an injury. I was pregnant, I had a surgery to remove the embryo, because it was an ectopic pregnancy..."

Cragen blinked a bit, trying to ward off his tears, but he failed. His tears dropped instantly and his lower lip shook violently "I'm so sorry Livia, that must have been so difficult."

She nodded, wiping her tears gently with her free hand "yeah, but we have gotten through it... It was a hard time but it's much better now. I have healed and although I will always have that reminder, I look forward to what the future holds... You should come visit"

"I will, but I may only be able to come around May time... I just returned to the precinct, it's my home. Having you back made me realise that svu is where I belong, and I can't wait to come out and see you. So tell me, what have you been up to for Christmas, I loved the gift you shipped through by the way." he said with a chuckle.

Olivia shrugged "you're welcome and I loved your gift too... I didn't do much for Christmas, Trevor and I had a cute little intimate moment the morning, stealing kisses and he gave me this locket. His family came by, his mom and his brother, that was a bit hectic but we got through it."

"So you met his mother, what was that like?"

"the first few days were horrible, she hated me and she brought his ex-fiancé along, so it was hell. We eventually cleared everything up and managed to make peace, I'm just glad everything is okay now."

He chuckled "well kiddo, I have to go now, we caught a case. I'll call you later if I catch a break, it was great catching up with you again, you look beautiful by the way."

"Thanks dad" she said with a blush "you look good too, next time I want more updates on your life... Find out about lady loves" she teased.

He chuckled "you are bad, and you know for a fact that I don't date."

"Ah but things change, and you could do with a little joy."

He shrugged "my joy is sitting in Oregon, glowing and creating a great life for herself. When you walked into that precinct all those years ago I knew you were spectacular, I was hard on you because I knew you could be the best. I was right, and I have never been more proud of anyone in my life, I'm glad to have you as my daughter, you mean the world to me Olivia Benson. I love you."

She sniffled once again "I love you too dad."


	36. Chapter 36

**Hicks.**

Olivia sat down opposite Alex, Casey and Eva who were all giggling. She rolled her eyes at her tipsy friends "you three are ridiculous."

"How are we ridiculous for wanting to set up a nursery for your babies?" Alex asked with a raised brow.

She shrugged "because you are all drunk, very drunk"

"That's because we are celebrating" Eva said with a giggle.

She narrowed her eyes at her friends "what are we celebrating exactly?"

"Haven't you heard?" Casey gasped, "Eva and Thomas are official... They are dating and he is flying in to see her."

Olivia's eyes widened, "what?! Eva that's great! Congratulations" she said before giving her a hug.

Eva blushed bashfully before smirking "I am going to get laid!!!"

Alex chuckled "here's to getting laid and having fun!"

Olivia raised her glass of water and laughed as they made a toast to sex. She was happy, having a girls day out was exactly what they needed, they had done the eating out and drinking and they still had to do some much needed shopping.

She smirked "we need to get going, the shopping centre is not going to be open all damn day."

"But I was enjoying getting fucked up" Eva pouted.

Alex rolled her eyes "come on kid, we can get fucked up later when mother dearest is all cuddled up with her man. For now, we've got a pregnant lady who needs to get clothes and things for the kiddos."

They stumbled out of the bar in a mess of laughter and playful bickering. Alex trailed behind the three women watching them talk animatedly about getting Eva all dolled up for her first official date after three years. She smiled as she watched them she was so excited about being around them, and she could hardly believe how much had changed over the years.

She went from sneaking around with Casey to being in a long distance relationship with her, it was all so crazy to her. She had been in love with Olivia for the longest time and she used to wish that the gorgeous brunette would notice her, but that never happened. Not while she was insane about her partner, so Alex opted for the next best option and got to know Casey, Olivia's other friend and they immediately clicked. They had this pull toward one another that she wished she had with Olivia, but alas, Olivia had her heart set on other things.

She then started sneaking around with Casey and it was thrilling, until Casey up and left without a warning and she was left torn. She not only lost Olivia but Casey too and it was the most painful experience of her life. Now they were all together again, with an extra member, Eva, who was an absolute sweetheart. She was bubbly and filled with life, something all of them lacked in New York, they were so job orientated that they forgot to live.

Olivia turned to Alex and gave her a small smile "you okay?"

She nodded "never been better"

"So Cas told me that she is moving to the city again... Are you excited?" she asked, falling in step with Alex.

Alex nodded "I am..." she bit her lip "I just miss you. Having my best friend out there was amazing... I actually wanted to move over here, Trevor and I have been speaking about the law firm and him opening up a firm over here."

Her face lit up "so Casey is planning to leave and you are wanting to stay... How is that going to work out?"

"I will speak to her about all of that later. I want our relationship to work out and I know we would do better if we were together, now I don't mean living together because that is a massive step, but like we would not need to fly in and out to see each other for a few days and then leave again for months." she shrugged as they walked over to the car.

"You looked stressed" she said with a raised eyebrow.

"I am" she admitted "this is a big step and I need to be sure it will work... So Trevor and I will be drawing up a bit of plans and Tommy is flying in next week to get it sorted out for us, also for your NY holiday house."

"Everything is piecing together well" she said with a smile.

"Yeah there are just a few details that need ironing over but we are getting there" she assured her friend before slipping into the back seat with Casey.

...

Olivia let out a soft laugh as Alex and Eva modelled about in various outfits while she and Casey sat back and watched them. She was sipping on some juice and snacking on some crisps, keeping herself occupied and also easing some of her cravings.

Aiden had been helping Sandy pick out a few outfits for clubbing events he had going on and immediately noticed the brunette haired woman that caught his attention ever since her arrival.

He walked over to her and smiled down at her "Julia, long time no see."

She turned to face him and gave him a tight smile "Hey Aiden, how are you doing?"

He looked down at her and gasped when he saw her bump standing out "you're pregnant?!"

"I am, eight months in to be exact" she smiled.

"wow, I didn't know. Congratulations" he said with a warm smile "do you know what it is yet?"

She shook her head "no, we decided not to find out."

"That's great. Mike must be excited" he said with a bitter sweet smile.

"He is, we both are excited, just one more month and they will be here."

A gasp dropped from him and his eyebrows knitted together in shock "they? Is it twins?"

She nodded "yes, we found out around Christmas time"

He nodded awkwardly, a sigh falling from his lips "Why did you guys keep it to yourselves? This is great news"

"We were shocked to say the least" she chuckled as she walked over to a dress rack and smirked as she saw a cute dress that would drive her husband insane "so we decided to keep it to ourselves and just bask in it. We have been in our home just enjoying this and learning more about what to expect when the little ones come and also preparing for them."

"You are glowing, you look amazing." he said with a warm smile.

Olivia gasped when she felt a strong kick and let out a chuckle "easy there kiddo" she said, running her hands over her bump gently "these kicks are getting worse with each day."

He shuffled nervously "do you mind?"

She shook her head before taking his hand and placing it against her bump, allowing him to feel the sharp kicks of the babies. She smirked as she watched him gasp and smile, he was surprised but in a good way.

Aiden removed his hand after a minute or two and smirked "Does it feel weird? Like having two humans inside of you"

"When you put it like that, it sounds weird, but no... It feels amazing, this is the best feeling ever. I love feeling them flutter around and kick, and as much as I want to see them both, I don't want the pregnancy to be over." she chuckled.

Eva walked over to the pair and raised a brow at Aiden "hey..."

He turned to her and gave her a small smile "hey Eva, how are you doing?"

"I am great, how are you?"

He shrugged "I'm shocked. Why didn't you tell me that Julia is pregnant?"

"It never came up" she shrugged "plus it's not like we see each other much."

He scratched the back of his neck nervously "well we have a few events coming up because we are expanding the club this year... And I would really like for you ladies would like to come by, if you want to though"

Olivia pursed her lips "Eva, Cas and Alex might pop in but I'm not exactly fit for partying at the moment, hell even walking is becoming an issue."

Eva forced a smile "I'll ask the girls about it and then we will let you know."

"Yeah thanks..." he said awkwardly "I have to get going, but uhm... Take care ladies, and I look forward to seeing you sometime. Julia all the best with the babies."

"Thanks Aiden" she smiled, watching him walk off.

Alex shook her head "That was the most awkward interaction I have ever seen in my life."

Olivia turned to her with a sigh "I feel like you are about to suggest something stupid."

"You are right... I say we go to the club" she said with a smirk.

Casey chuckled "I'm in"

Eva turned to Olivia and sighed "Liv?"

She shook her head "I have two humans inside of me, it is exhausting and going to the club will be too much for me right now" she ran her hand over her bump "my hormones are all over the place and I don't want to be in that place while I'm in this state. So you three can go and I will stay home with my husband where I feel safe."

"If you won't go then neither will -"

"You have to go" she cut her friend off "Eva, I will be okay, you go ahead and have fun with the ladies. Just please be careful too, you know how it goes over there."

Alex furrowed her brow "how does it go?"

"Just don't accept any drinks from Aiden, or don't accept his special, personalised drinks..." Eva explained.

Casey scoffed "is he the dick that drugged you?"

"Yeah..." she said with a sigh "but he had been trying to get with me for a few weeks before then..."

"Well then why aren't you going, just to show him something he will never have" Alex smirked "tease him a bit. It'll be fun, rub it in his face that he will never get to be with you."

Olivia let out a laugh, shaking her head "that's the crap we did when we were teenagers."

"and was it fun?" she raised a brow.

"it was so much fun, I loved doing it" she laughed out loud.

...

Trevor turned to his wife and furrowed his brows "why aren't we going clubbing again?"

Olivia shrugged as she walked up to him "Because I'm tired, carrying them is exhausting and my ankles are swollen."

He smirked "I could always give you a massage?"

"that would be lovely" she said, biting down on her lower lip as she laid down on their bed.

Trevor moved over and squirted some of her massage oils into his hands before moving onto the bed, he took hold of her swollen feet and gently began massaging them, feeling the tension leave her.

Olivia closed her eyes and let out a contented sigh "that feels amazing..."

He chuckled, finishing up both of her feet before taking hold of the stretch mark cream and gently rubbing it on her bump. His hands trailed slowly over her stretched skin, he was still in awe of her bump and the way her body had changed to house their babies.

"You have no idea how beautiful you are right now, you are so gorgeous right now, just lying here and keeping our babies safe." he pressed a soft kiss to her bump "I love you so much"

She reached down and ran her hand through his hair "I love you too, more than I ever thought possible."

He moved up and pressed a number of soft kisses to her lips, his hand still caressing her bump slowly.

After a few minutes she broke their kiss and moved to sit up "my back has been throbbing all day... This pain just keeps worsening, I need to stand up a bit."

"let me help you" he smiled softly, walking around to her side of the bed and gently helping her stand "you're a week away from your due date, are you sure you are okay?"

She nodded "yeah, can you get me some water or something please... I just need to stay like this for a bit, it's easing the pain"

He kissed the side of her head "okay I'll be right back, don't do anything and stay right there."

"It's like I can run anywhere right, I'm in too much damn pain" she scoffed.

Trevor let out a breath and raised his hands in surrender "I was joking babe, but I'll go get that water now."

"Thanks" she groaned out "Trev?"

He stopped at the bedroom door "yeah?"

"I think we need to get to hospital..." she whispered.

He furrowed his brow "why, are you feeling any pain?"

She looked down at let out a groan "no... But uhm... My water just broke."

...

**_A/N_**

**_Hey readers._**

**_I hope you all are still enjoying this, and I hope you are all excited for what's coming next._**

**_Let me know what y'all think about it so far._**

**_Don't forget to leave your reviews._**

**_-Karrrm._**


	37. Chapter 37

**Welcome To The World.**

Olivia had been in labour for exactly fourteen hours, trying her absolute best to bring both little ones into the world safely. She was a mess of cries and screams as her contractions hit her with brut force, leaving her breathless and shaking.

Trevor had been right by her side the entire time, holding her and comforting her in every way possible. He even listened on patiently as she told how she was never having kids again and she would never let him touch her. He wiped away her tears when she began crying out of sheer exhaustion, and a fear for losing their precious little babies. He stood by her side the entire time, not taking a break even for a minute or two, he refused to leave her side.

The labour process was an absolute nightmare to Olivia, she had never experienced such pain before and she never felt the hours tick by so slowly in her life. It felt never ending, but when the time finally came and her little one's entered the world, one after the other, she was absolutely elated.

Hearing the piercing cries of the first baby, brought tears of joy to her eyes, but she barely had an opportunity to savour the moment before it was time to get the other little into the world. She pushed with all of her strength, giving her all just to have both of their babies safe.

Trevor caught both little ones and smiled down at them with fatherly pride before watching as they got carried away by nurses to get cleaned up. His face was littered with tears of joy as he watched them bring the babies back to their mother and gently placed both of them on her chest.

Olivia let out the softest sobs as she looked down at both babies, their little eyes shut and their tiny chests rising and falling ever so softly. They were the most adorable human beings she had ever laid her eyes on, they took her breath away in the best way possible. She was elated, ecstatic even, she was finally a mother.

Trevor stood beside her bed and snapped a picture of the three people who now owned his heart. He leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss to his wife's forehead, lingering against her skin for a minute or two "thank you" he whispered.

She furrowed her eyebrows "what for?"

"For carrying them and bringing them safely into the world" he whispered, leaning down and pressing soft kisses to each of their little foreheads.

"They are so beautiful, I love them so much already... I love you so much" she whispered, sniffling softly as a few more tears made their way down her cheeks.

One of the babies began whimpering softly and suckled hungrily at it's hand while the other slept soundly. Olivia looked down at her whimpering son and pressed a kiss to his forehead "he's hungry, I need to feed him."

"I'll hold her while you feed him, she's asleep" Trevor said before taking the little girl from his wife's arms. He looked down at his daughter wrapped safely in her little white blanket, a smile tugged at his lips as he held her "she has your nose."

Olivia let out a soft giggle before moving up a bit and positioning her son so that he could drink, she smiled down at him "he has my nose too"

"We need to name them, you have any ideas?" he asked, not once taking his eyes off his daughter.

"Madison" she said with a warm smile "I always loved that name, when I was little I asked my mom if she would get me a sister so her name could be Madison... I never got that wish but now I'd love for my little princess to have that name. What do you think about it?"

He looked up at her and smirked "I think it's perfect and I love that her name has a such a special story behind it."

"What about this little guy?" she asked.

Trevor's face lit up "Noah. That was my best friend's name, he was the coolest guy I knew... Unfortunately he passed on, he was only twenty and he joined the force, after two months a single shot to the head ended his life."

She looked down at her son "Noah, I like it"

Noah opened his eyes and stared up at his mother as he suckled hungrily at her nipple, his eyes wide open as he took in his surroundings.

Trevor looked down at Madison and chuckled when she scrunched up her face in her sleep "she's so much like you already, she scrunched up her face. She's beautiful Liv"

Olivia looked over at her husband and let out a contented sigh "you have no idea how amazing this sight is... Seeing you with our little girl is something I never thought would happen, even holding this little guy is a dream come true for me."

She looked down at her son and ran her fingers over his soft brunette hair "I always thought I would end up alone in my apartment with nobody but my squad to turn to. I got used to the idea of it and accepted that it was my fate, but being here now, with you and our babies is such a blessing." she sniffled "Trevor you made every one of my dreams come true, you gave me these wonderful babies and you gave me a love I have never experienced before. I don't think I tell you enough just how much I love you, you mean the world to me and now we've got these two precious angels as a part of that world."

"I love you too Olivia, and I know it may not seem like it to most people, but you changed my life for the better too. I'll do everything I can to prove to you and our babies just how much I love you three, just how much I appreciate this life we have and everything that brought us to this point." he leaned down and pressed a deep, love filled kiss to her lips.

They stayed that way for a few minutes, only breaking apart when air was necessary and the whimper of Madison brought them back to the present. Trevor quickly handed the little girl to his wife as she needed to be fed as well, he then took hold of Noah who needed to be burped.

The little boy scrunched up his face when he was detached from his mother's breast and let out a whimper, his little eyes filling with tears. He began crying softly while Trevor shifted him and gently rubbed his little back, leading him to let out a soft burp. Trevor then shifted him and gently rocked him until his cries turned into little hiccups and soon he was once again silent, his eyes closed as he slept in his father's arms.

"You're good with him"

He shrugged "maybe it's because he's not a fussy baby. He is calm, just like his dad."

She chuckled "it feels so surreal, you're a dad and I'm a mother, we have children."

...

"You have got to stop scaring the crap out of us like that. What the hell happened?" Alex asked as she, Eva and Casey walked into the room.

Trevor called them and told them that he rushed Olivia to the hospital, what he did not inform them of was that both little one's were born.

Olivia looked up from her sleeping babies and smiled at the shocked faces of her friends. She bit her lip before looking up at her husband "did you not tell them that the babies arrived?"

He shrugged innocently "I must have forgotten to mention that bit."

Casey gasped and walked over to Olivia "oh my god, they are so tiny."

Eva cooed at the little babies in her friends arms before turning to Trevor "they are so cute... Can I take them home with me?"

"No but you can come visit them any time at our place, we're going to need all the help we can get." he said with a warm smile.

Alex walked over to Trevor and slapped him upside his head "you left that bit out on purpose asshole." she scowled playfully at him "when did this happen?"

"Yesterday" Olivia pipped up with a smile, looking down at her babies who slept peacefully on her chest, both of their lips pouted. She shook her head and let out a soft laugh "we were getting ready to join you three and then I changed my mind at the last minute because I wasn't feeling that great... After about twenty minutes I asked Trev to get me some water, and before I knew what was happening my water broke."

"These two did not want to wait any longer and I for one and extremely happy to have them here. They've been nothing but sweet since birth" he added with a proud smile.

Alex reached down and gently scooped Madison into her arms, cradling her gently when she let out a soft whimper "hey there pretty girl, I'm your aunty..." she beamed as she looked down at the little girl "she's gorgeous."

Eva took hold of the little boy and cradled him gently, smiling when his little eyes opened up and focused on her face "hi little guy, aren't you just the cutest little guy ever."

Madison stared up at Alex and suckled at her little hand before letting out a soft whimper. Her face scrunched up and soon she was letting out loud piercing cries, thick beady tears rolling down her cheeks.

Casey chuckled before raising an eyebrow at Alex "you sure you can handle her babe?"

She shrugged before moving the little girl to her shoulder and gently patting her back until her cries turned into hiccups "I have a nephew who I baby sat multiple times, so this whole baby thing is not new to me."

Eva let out a soft giggle "this little guy is so calm, he's just sucking his thumb"

Olivia let out a laugh "he loves doing that... They are so much alike, yet so different at the same time."

"They are perfect, just like their mother." Trevor said before moving over to his wife, he leaned down and pressed a very passionate kiss to her lips, he gently pulled her into his embrace and pressed a few soft pecks to her lips "I love you so damn much babe, I really do."

"I love you too, you have made me happier than I have ever been before. Also I do want more kids, I did not mean what I said when I was in labour" she said with a soft laugh, before letting out a groan "okay it still hurts to laugh."

"you've got a lot of time to heal, Thomas is coming by and so is my business partner... We're going to start working on expanding and moving the business over and so I'll be home all the time to help you while working." he pressed a kiss to her forehead "maybe that little guy could help me make a few business decisions and they will help start on getting that centre opened up for you."

She beamed with pure joy as she looked up at him "Trev that sounds absolutely amazing, I can't wait to get everything started but I also can't wait to spend hours on end with our precious sweethearts."

Olivia turned to her friends who stood one side cooing at the little babies in their arms, she pursed her lips before raising her brow at them "Ladies do you think you would be willing to hand them over for a feed?" she teased.

Alex pursed her lips "but they are so cute and I just got this little guy"

Casey chuckled as Madison cooed softly "I want to have a baby too... Do you two think you could make another one and give it to me?"

Trevor let out a hearty laugh "well Liv still has to heal but if or when we do have more kids, we plan on keeping them."

"That's unfair, you guys get to have all the baby loving." she pouted.

After a few minutes both babies began fussing and crying, forcing the women to hand them over so that their mother could feed them. Olivia took each of them and allowed both of them to latch onto her breast, she smiled as they suckled hungrily at her breast and stared up at her with wide eyes.

Alex smirked "Tandem breastfeeding is something I never thought I would see you doing... But it kind of suits you, you look cute with kids in your arms."

Olivia looked up at her friend and smiled happily "thank you Alex, this really is a dream come true. Just holding them is so surreal, I love it, I love them."

"So... What are you going to name them?" Eva asked with a furrowed brow.

"Noah Dean Langan" he said with a smirk, running his hand over his son's hair.

"And Madison Tiffany Langan" Olivia finished, hearing a gasp fall from her Husband's lips "I know how much your sister meant to you, and who better to name our baby girl after."

He felt his eyes welling up as he looked down at his babies "it's perfect."

* * *

**_So there it is, the little ones have finally arrived._**

**_This was just a bit of a filler but I hope you all enjoyed it, let me know what your thoughts on this one are._**

**_Reviews are highly appreciated. _**


	38. Chapter 38

**The Little Things.**

Olivia and the babies returned home two days later and she was extremely excited to get started on their life with the little ones. Both babies already had so much personality, both of them spending tons of time awake and just making soft cooing noises as they stared at their parents. Olivia laid down with both little ones beside her and chuckled as they looked around the room with wide eyes.

Trevor moved to his side of the bed and smirked down at his son "hey there kiddos"

Both sets of eyes snapped up to him and little smiles covered their faces. Noah looked up at his father and cooed softly before yawning, Madison followed suit and moved her little hand onto her brothers chest. Noah did a massive stretch before pouting and letting out a soft whimper, his little eyes searching for his mother.

Olivia reached over and took hold of her little boy, gently running her hand through his brunette hair "you just had a feed little man, it's nap time isn't it."

He whimpered, his little hand gripping onto her sweater as he cried. She sighed softly "oh sweet boy, calm down, mommy's here." she whispered, rocking gently.

Trevor laid beside his wife, running his fingers over Madison's little cheek "she's so calm..."

Her little eyes drooped closed, her hand enclosed around her fathers finger "she's knocked out" he gently rubbed her little back and pressed a kiss to her forehead.

Olivia gently rocked Noah to sleep and pressed a kiss to his forehead before laying him down beside his sister "they are so tiny..."

"that they are... I'm going to fix us something to eat while you keep an eye on these two" he said before leaning down and pressing a kiss to her lips.

She smirked against his lips, deepening the kiss for a minute or two. She pulled away and smiled up at him "mmm I missed kissing you like that"

"I miss doing more than just kissing you like that... I can't wait for you to heal so that I can make love you again and show you just how much this all means to me." he pressed a kiss to her lips again.

...

**Three months later:**

Olivia carried her little ones downstairs and smirked when she saw Thomas and Trevor's business partner walk in. She placed both little ones down in their baby swings and pressed a kiss to each of their heads "Tommy it's good to see you again."

He walked over to her and kissed both of her cheeks "Hey Liv, I missed you... How are you doing?"

"I can't complain, these two and your brother keep me on my feet all the time." she chuckled.

Henshall did a once over of his partners wife and smirked, she was nothing short of gorgeous and it was no surprise to him that his blue-eyed partner could land someone as beautiful as the woman who stood infront of him "you must be Olivia... Trevor forgot to mention how beautiful you are."

She blushed ever so slightly and shook his hand "thank you so much, and you must be James Henshal. I've heard a lot about you."

"Those words have a tendency to worry me" he joked.

She let out a soft laugh "there's no need to worry, it was mostly good things."

"That's good to know" he smiled before following her into the living room.

Thomas gasped as he looked at his nephew and niece who laid peacefully in their little baby swings, both of their blue eyes wide open as they laid silently. Noah had a pacifier in his mouth, a little rattle hung at the top of his swing and his eyes were wide as he looked up at it. Madison on the other hand did not like her pacifier and often spat it out, she was peaceful as can be and laid silently as she looked at the rattle on the her swing as well.

Olivia chuckled as she watched Thomas take in the little ones infront of him "uncle Tommy say hi to your nephew Noah and your niece Madison."

He cooed at the little babies before scooping both of them out of their swings, he held them close and smiled brightly "okay I will be coming over a lot more often now."

Trevor walked into the livingroom and smirked at his brother "Tommy don't hog the babies."

"It's too late, they are mine now" he teased before sitting down with both kids.

Olivia shook her head at her husband and Thomas "would you like anything to drink?"

Henshall smirked and took a seat "I would not say no to a beer."

"okay, Thomas you want anything?"

He shrugged "no thanks Liv, I'm good for now."

Trevor looked up at his wife and smirked "I'll have a beer too."

She nodded and went into the kitchen to get the necessities leaving both babies in the living room. She let out a sigh as she prepared what was asked, she dialed Alex' number as she fixed a sandwich for herself "hey Al, are you busy?"

"No, I just finished unpacking. What's up?"

"I just need to get out of the house for a bit, I have a bit of Cabin fever and need an escape before I go insane."

She chuckled "we can go for a walk... You can bring Noah and Madi along."

She let out a heavy breath "sure... I was hoping it could be just us, but you're probably right."

"Liv they need you, they are only three months old... Are you feeling okay?"

She shrugged "I'm fine, just a bit overwhelmed I guess."

"okay meet me in the park in five minutes" she said before greeting and hanging up.

Olivia made her way into the living room and gave her husband a weak smile "can I speak to you for a minute?"

He nodded, holding Noah in his arms while Thomas blew raspberries at a smiling Madison. He followed his wife into the kitchen and furrowed his brow when he saw the exhausted look on her face "Liv, baby are you okay?"

"I just..." she stopped letting out a breath "I don't know if I can do this Trev. This whole precinct and working mom thing just seems too much, I don't know if I can make it."

He reached up and cupped her cheek "hey calm down, there's no need to worry. We will figure this out, if you feel you won't be able to handle it, you do not have to do it. If you want to stay home with these two angels, you can do it. It's completely up to you darling."

She gave him a tight lipped smile "thank you, for everything. I love you"

He leaned down and pressed a loving kiss to her lips "I love you too"

She pulled him down again when he tried to pull away and allowed herself to get lost in his kiss for a moment. She pulled away when air was necessary and bit her lip "I know you're trying to make a living for us and build up our life here, but I need you to focus on us too..." she took hold of Noah and pressed a kiss to his cheek "and these little ones."

He stood confused as she walked out of the kitchen, wondering what she was on about he soon returned to the livingroom to find Olivia and both babies gone. He turned to Thomas "Where did Liv go?"

He shrugged before getting up "she said something about meeting Alex at a park. I'm heading over to Eva's place, you two can discuss the boring business stuff and let me know when you're ready to buy a building."

...

Alex smirked when she caught sight of Olivia pushing a double stroller with two bubbling babies in it. She walked up to her friend and pulled her in for a hug.

"Alex you are crushing me" she chuckled.

She let go and let out a breath "I just miss you, you have been very busy lately momma bear."

She shrugged "comes with the territory. I have a husband who is so busy getting the firm sorted that I have to deal with these two busy bodies 24/7. I mean I love them with my whole heart but it does get quite tiring sometimes."

Alex looked at little ones who laid peacefully in their sides of the stroller, both of their cheeks rosy and two tiny pacifiers stuck in their mouths. She leaned down a pressed a kiss to both of their foreheads "but they are so cute and tiny"

"Don't let that fool you, they make tons of demands" she chuckled.

"but how are you? You sounded down on the phone" she prompted.

Olivia let out a sigh before sitting down on one of the benches "I have been feeling a little depressed lately. Trevor has been so busy with getting the firm up and running and getting my papers sorted so that I can open up a precinct here. I appreciate everything he is doing, I love that he is taking this so seriously, but I miss him. I miss waking up next to my husband and just having a conversation with him that lasts longer than five minutes. I miss our little morning kisses or joining him in the shower and just being in his arms, I want my husband who was always there." she sniffled softly "I kinda feel alone..."

"Oh Liv" she pulled her friend in for a comforting hug "I know this is difficult for you, but we will figure this out okay... Listen I have to go meet up with Cas, but I'm going to pop in tonight, with the girls. You and Trevor are going out, and I don't want to hear any crap because these two angels will be perfectly fine with Eva, Cas, Tommy and I. You just need to pump enough for them and give us a run down of their schedule so that we can have them snuggled up on time and fed and all of that."

She pursed her lips "that sounds wonderful but we may not be able to make it, Henshall just flew in today and they are really busy. We can do it when he leaves and all of this crap is sorted."

Alex huffed "but..."

"Al please... I know you're trying to help but it won't work. I know how Trevor is, his business comes first, and I just have to adapt to that. I used to be that way too, but I guess being away from work so long changed my views. Now these two little ones come first as well as Trevor, my family is everything and this is just one of the little sacrifices that I have to make. I'll get over it soon."

"fine" she huffed "if you are sure that you are okay then I won't push any further. I just, I care about you, and I hate seeing you like this."

"I'll be okay, I'm a big girl, I can handle myself." she chuckled.

"you are the toughest person I know. I am well aware that you can handle your own, but I hate seeing you like this. I can see that you are hurting and I hate it because I can't fix it..."

Olivia let out a sigh before taking Madison out of the stroller as she began crying, she gently patted her back and pressed a kiss to the side of her head "I will be okay. Trevor is a good man and he will realise what is happening and I have kind of spoken to him before I came here."

"He loves you"

"I know that. I don't doubt it, I just miss him and all our little moments, I miss the things he did just to see me smile. I miss the little things, the random kisses, corny jokes and the constant teasing, but I will figure it all out."

She placed Madison back into the stroller once she calmed down and gently ran her finger over Noah's rosy cheeks "I have to get these buggers home for a feed and lay them down for a nap. Thank you for coming out and letting me blow off steam, I needed it."

"There is no need to thank me, this is what I'm here for. I will still be popping in to check in on you later though, just to check if you are doing a bit better. Also I want some cuddles from your love bugs." she reached down and ran her fingers over Madison's black curly hair.

Olivia let out a soft laugh "you can definitely come by and get some time with them, that way I'll have a little break to take a long bath and just let off some steam."

...

Later that night, Alex, Casey and Eva had already left and Thomas took Trevor's business partner back to the hotel he was staying at. Trevor had been downstairs cleaning up the mess that was made during dinner while Olivia went upstairs with both babies and got them ready for bed.

She had just finished feeding both little one's and smiled softly when Trevor came up and took hold of Noah, he gently burped the baby boy, while she burped Madison before both of them went to lay the little one's down in their side-by-side cots which stood on her side of the room.

Olivia leaned down and pressed soft kisses to both babies foreheads, covering them up as best as she could "sleep well lovebugs, mommy loves you."

Trevor mirrored his wife's actions before smiling down at both sleeping babies "they've grown so much over these last few months, I love them."

"Then why won't you spend time with them? Or me?" she spat, turning to face him.

He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion "what are you talking about? Liv I've been trying to get everything up and running so that we can survive out here."

She pursed her lips "That does not mean you have to forget that you have a family. You hardly ever hold them."

"So because you can't handle both babies, that makes me a bad parent?" he spat back, a frown covering his face.

She scoffed before shaking her head "Atleast I spend time with them, I don't only come around for the putting them to bed. Atleast one of their parents is there to change their diapers, feed them, bath them and just nurture and love them. Get your head out of your ass and start acting like a father to your babies!"

"That's low... Even for you, you know full well I've been working my ass off to get the business sorted so that I can support you and both of our babies!" he defended.

She pursed her lips "I didn't know that going to clubs with your business partner was a part of supporting your family."

He shook his head "so because we had kids I'm not allowed to have fun?!"

"No you asshole, that's not what it's about!" she yelled, her eyes filling with tears "it's about fucking priorities! You have a wife and two babies, I cannot do all of this on my own Trevor, I need your help. I miss my husband who loved spending time with me and used to speak to my bump, promising them the world but now you are hardly ever here. If your fun is so much more important than your family then you are in the wrong place right now."

He looked at the tears that rolled down her cheeks and sighed "Olivia..."

"No. Don't try to soft soap me through this, it is not going to work... I want my husband back, but I am not going to subject myself and these babies to being the second best in your life. I've been there before and you were the one who showed me that I deserve to be loved endlessly, so I'll be damned if you think I'm going to allow you to keep doing this."

She turned away from him, her tears still falling from her eyes and she bit her lip to keep her from letting out the sob that threatened to leave her throat. She could hardly believe how much he felt like a stranger to her now, her once loving husband was now a man who went out six nights in a week and hardly ever saw his growing little ones. She was starting to wonder if he even still loved them, or her.

Trevor stood silently, looking at his crying wife and let out a breath, he had not even realised how bad things had gotten until now.

He pursed his lips "I know you are angry... But I really am sorry Olivia, I love you, I really do and I love both of our babies. I had no idea how this was affecting you or even the little one's, I will change. I know you don't believe me right now, but I will prove it to you, because it is what you deserve. You deserve to be loved and I am going to show you just how much I love you."

He walked up to her and gently reached for her, letting out a sigh when she pulled away "let me make it up to you babe. Please"

She shook her head "sex is not going to fix this Trevor."

"I know that, I just... I want to hold you, and just lay with you for a bit. I haven't done it in ages and I want to fix this, I know I hurt you but please just give me another chance to fix things." he pleaded.

* * *

**_A/N_**

**_Hey readers, I hope you all enjoyed this. I know it was a little angsty and I promise things will pick up _****_soon._**

**_Le_****_ me know what you all thought about this chapter and I will try my best to get the next update out as soon as possible._**

**_-Karrrm._**


	39. Chapter 39

**Homesick.**

**Two weeks later:**

Olivia and Trevor had both taken the time to talk out their differences and eventually ruled it down to both of them being overwhelmed by all the changes in their life. They then set to finding ways to balance out their schedules and were soon back on track, spending just the right amount of time with their babies, each other and their businesses.

Two weeks had gone by in a blur and Trevor was proud of the progress they had made this far, they had found the perfect property for the firm and immediately settled the deal. They also found a gorgeous little building that could be turned into a rape crisis centre where Olivia would be counciling survivors. Both buildings were currently being renovated, and they were excited to see the outcome of it all.

Amongst all of this excitement and business Trevor noticed that their was still something a little off with Olivia, she was not her usual bubbly self. He had no idea of what could have gone wrong this time but he hoped that he could somehow put her mind to rest.

She was currently sat at the breakfast bar talking to Eva and Thomas who were cuddled up at the island "you two make me sick."

"you're just jealous cause I got the hotter brother." Eva teased.

Olivia let out a hearty laugh "no offense Tommy, but Trevor is hotter."

"I can second that" Trevor teased as he walked into the kitchen.

Olivia turned and watched as he went to get himself some juice "where are the rascals?"

He pressed a kiss to the side of her head "they are asleep in the nursery, I switched the baby monitors on to ensure that we can hear if they were to wake up soon."

She gave him a warm smile and wrapped her arms around him "I love you."

He leaned down and allowed his lips to meet hers, giving her a deep kiss, his arms wrapping around her body. He held her close as their lips parted, a smile on his lips "I love you too beautiful."

"get a room already" Thomas teased.

Olivia rolled her eyes at him, pulling her husband closer. She allowed her hand to rest on the back of his head, gently pulling him down for another kiss. She deepened their kiss, knowing that her friends were just awkwardly staring at them.

She pulled away and let out a soft giggle "mm, I missed kissing you like that"

He gave her a playful smirk "we'll get back to this later... When these prying eyes aren't here to see all the details."

"Thank god" Eva pipped up.

Olivia let out a loud laugh at her friend's response and shook her head "you have some nerve being a smart ass in our home..."

Eva scoffed "pfft I basically live here."

Trevor smirked at her "if that's the case you need to start paying rent."

...

"Liv sit down, we need to speak" he said softly, sitting on the foot of their bed.

She turned to him and let out a sigh "Trev I need to bath"

He got up and walked up to her "the kids are asleep, you have all the time in the world... I just need to talk to you."

"Then you can do it in the bathroom. My muscles are aching and I'm feeling a little shitty so I need that bath." she explained before making her way into the bathroom.

He followed her into the bathroom and opened up the taps, allowing the bathtub to fill up while he turned to her. He reached for her and pressed a kiss to her forehead "I love you."

"I love you too" she whispered, looking up into his blue eyes that seemed to have a tell tale sparkle to them, she shook her head "honey I'm not in the mood for sex tonight."

He shrugged "nobody said anything about sex, I just want to spend some time with you. Get you to relax a bit" he reached for the buttons on her shirt and slowly started undoing them.

She let out a breath and allowed him to continue, she was not really in the mood for anything intimate right now, but she did not want to turn him down for seemed to be the fifth time this week. She had not felt like herself recently, she felt uncomfortable in her own skin and just wanted to be left alone.

Trevor gently pushed her shirt off her shoulders, a smile on his lips as he stared at her standing infront of him in nothing but a bra and her jeans. He leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to her shoulder moving his soft kisses up her neck, until they landed on the spot that drove her wild.

Her eyes fluttered closed and she let out a soft breathy moan, feeling her body react to his antics. She tilted her head slightly, giving him more access to her skin, feeling him suck at her neck and graze his teeth against the already sensitive skin. Her hands reached for him and pulled his body closer and suddenly every thought about not having sex flew out the window. She wanted him, and she wanted him now.

Her hands fumbled with the button on his jeans, working on getting rid of the offensive material. She undid the zipper and tugged at his jeans, forcing it down his hips, she then reached into his boxer breifs and moaned when she felt his erection. Her other hand moved to the back of his head, guiding his kisses to her lips.

Trevor had not intended to have sex with his wife when he followed her into the bathroom, but he wasn't going to say no to some action either. It had been forever since the last time they made love and both of them were pleasantly surprised by the speed in which their bodies reacted. He broke their kiss after some time and eased out of her embrace, he turned off the water and turned back to undo her jeans.

After a few minutes they were seated in the bathtub, Trevor groaned into her mouth when she sunk onto his erection. Both of their mouths crashed together passionately as their hips rolled in rhythm, their hands gripping at any skin they could reach.

Olivia squeezed her eyes shut when she felt him fill her up completely, she could hardly remember the last time they had been together, but having him now, like this was all she needed. Their hips rolled together slowly, rocking and causing some of the water to drop over the bathtub. Her head dropped onto his shoulder and her teeth sunk into his skin to stop her from screaming out as she came undone.

Trevor groaned as he pulled her body closer to his own as he too came undone. He reached up and gently lifted her face, pressing a soft and slow kiss to her lips, she moaned into their kiss and allowed him to just love her in that moment. His hands gently caressed her body, her mouth crashing against his as they let out some of the pent up passion between them.

She broke their kiss after a few minutes and pouted "can we move this to the bedroom?"

He nodded "yes we can..." he whispered before giving her another deep kiss.

...

Three months had come and gone in what felt like seconds, the finishing touches were finally put on the new Special Victims Unit that Trevor and Olivia financed. Olivia had to undergo a number of different tests and getting everything done to get her to atleast being the Luitenant at the new precinct.

She had just returned home from yet another test and she was exhausted, a tired smile playing on her lips when she saw Trevor and Thomas sitting and fooling around with Noah and Madi. She dropped onto the sofa beside her husband and sighed as Noah turned to look at her, his little face lighting up at the sight of his mother.

Trevor chuckled lightly and kissed the little boys head "give momma a little time to rest son, she just got home."

She looked over at her son's smiling face and laughed softly before reaching for him. She pressed a number of soft kisses to his curly hair and smiled brightly as he let out a number of soft giggles "hey little guy, did you miss momma?"

He made a number of cooing noises before letting out a soft giggle, his face contorted into a wide toothless grin "mmm" he huffed out before reaching for his sister.

Madison looked over as soon as she heard her brother's voice, her little eyes lighting up. She immediately began kicking her little legs and fussing to go to her mother, she scrunched up her face and cried out, not wanting to be away from her brother any longer. Thomas handed the little girl over to her mother after pressing a kiss to her forehead, he gently stroked her hair as she laid against Olivia's chest.

Her cries turned into hiccups after a few minutes and she eventually simmered down and began suckling her thumb. Olivia smiled as both babies rested against her chest, her eyes closed as she just held both babies.

Trevor pressed a kiss to the side of her head "you need to get some rest"

"when was their last nap?" she asked.

Thomas shrugged "three or four hours ago..."

Olivia let out a soft gasp "they must be exhausted, babe will you help me put them down for a bit?"

He nodded before getting up and taking hold of both babies so that his wife could get up, he cradled both babies and moved up the stairs with his wife following him up the stairs. He watched Thomas walk into the kitchen and chuckled "Tommy and I are going to prepare dinner while you take a nap. I know it's been hectic these last few months and I want you to get as much rest as possible, which is why you and I will be going on a vacation once this is all done."

She followed him into the room and sat down on the rocking chair, taking hold of Madison first. She raised her shirt gently and allowed her daughter to latch onto her breast. She gently traced her finger over her little girls curly hair, a smile playing on her lips.

"I still can't believe how much time has gone by already, it feels like just yesterday we got married and found out you were pregnant, and then just as suddenly these little ones were born and now they are about to hit the four month mark in next week." he said as he sat opposite his wife and gently rocked Noah.

She let out a soft laugh "I have been waiting for moments like these forever, I never thought that when I finally became a mother it would be with an amazing man like you."

He handed Noah over to his wife and gently burped Madison, slowly rocking her to sleep while his wife fed the other little one. He raised an inquisitive brow at his wife "when you pictured yourself having a family, who did you picture as the man in your life?"

She sighed "At first it was Elliot... I had this insane idea that he would have joint custody of his kids and I would help raise them, while we had four kids of our own. I knew his kids adored me but I also knew that I could never take Kathy's place in their life and I didn't want to. Then David and I dated and he showed me a different relationship than what I had become accustomed to, I thought we would be together forever, that he was the one for me. I pictured a little brown eyed girl, my smile, his nose, silky brunette hair, it was a dream..."

She looked up at her husband and smirked "but now that I'm here, with you and our kids, I am so damn happy that those relationships never worked out. That I ended up with you and got two precious little angels out of it, our beautiful babies are a symbol of our love. I would not want my life with anybody else, I love you and this life we have, it's more than I could ever imagine."

"let's lay these kiddos down, you look exhausted." he said with a sweet smile.

They laid both babies down and tucked them in before turning on the baby monitor and going to their bedroom. Olivia walked into the closet and changed into one of her husbands button down shirts, she walked back to the room and raised a brow at her husband who was heading to the bedroom door.

She bit her lip and let out a sigh "Trev, can you lay with me?"

He moved over to her "sure, why?"

"I'm feeling home sick..." she whispered before moving to lay beneath the blankets.

He laid down beside her after removing his sweater and pulled her into his arms "you miss New York?"

She shook her head, cuddling into his embrace "no, I miss you."


	40. Chapter 40

**Big City.**

"Okay, are you two sure you have everything you need?" Eva asked as she held a giggling Noah in her arms.

Casey sat on the sofa beside her cousin holding Madison who was babbling on in a language nobody understood, she chuckled before kissing the little girls head "hey kid, are you ranting about having to leave home for the next three weeks?"

Olivia playfully scoffed "she better not be ranting, because it is way too late to cancel flight plans."

"mamma" she smiled before reaching for her mother.

Olivia took hold of the eleven month old baby and kissed her forehead "you ready to go sweetheart?"

She shrugged before cuddling into her mothers arms, letting out a loud yawn. Her blue eyes were droopy and her cheeks were a deep shade of red, her chubby arms wrapped around her mother's neck.

Trevor came downstairs and kissed the side of Olivia's head "this munchkin looks exhausted"

"I wish Noah would learn from his sister but he is a ball of energy" she chuckled, looking over at her son who was giggling loudly in Eva's arms.

Eva made faces at the laughing eleven month old and smirked when she heard Olivia "I like him this way, he's fun."

Trevor nodded "they are very different, in a good way..." he kissed his little girls head "we should get going."

Eva carried Noah to the car while Trevor took their bags and loaded into the trunk of their car. Olivia strapped a sleepy Madi into her car seat, she let out a sigh when Madi began moaning and groaning about wanting to sleep. She strapped Noah in beside his sister and pressed a kiss to his forehead, before giving him a pacifier.

Noah settled back and suckled happily on the pacifier, while his sister began screaming beside him. She always hated her carseat and being strapped in while driving about, it was a nightmare for both of her parents whenever they had to go anywhere.

Olivia hugged Eva and Casey and pressed kisses to each of their cheeks, she cupped Eva's cheek and smirked "I'll see you two after three weeks, and I promise to bring both of your partners back with me."

Trevor let out a sigh as he turned to Madison who was screaming at the top of her lungs and kicking her feet to get out of the seat. He turned to face her and let out a groan "Madi calm down, you'll be out in no time."

She scrunched up her face and balled up her fists "mamma out!!" she screamed.

Olivia got into the passenger seat of the car after greeting the girls, she turned to her screaming daughter and shook her head "Madison, stop screaming. I will take you out as soon as we get to the airport, for now you have to be a good girl."

Casey got in on the back seat "is she going to be crying like this the entire drive?"

Noah sat in his car seat beside his sister and cooed softly, chewing on his pacifier while Madison screamed out. Olivia passed a bottle back and smiled when Casey took the bottle and gave it to Madi who immediately suckled at it, her cries subsiding instantly.

Trevor let out a sigh of relief "we need to take her on drives more often because she always freaks out in the car."

"Well you won't have much of a choice since you will be driving all around the city." she turned to Noah and smirked "are you excited to meet your grandmother?"

Noah shook his head "no"

Olivia let out a laugh at her son's cheeky response "Noah don't be mean..."

"Mamma" he stretched his arms to her and scrunched up his face when she shook her head.

She sighed when she saw him pouting "don't you dare start crying, we just got your sister calm."

Noah completely ignored his mother's words and started crying out for her to remove him from the car seat, he was sleepy and wanted to cuddle with his mother. After a while Madison joined him, having finished her milk, she started crying to be released from the car seat once again.

The drive to the airport felt never ending for the three adults, having both babies moody and screaming was a nightmare. Olivia felt releaved that they had managed to get a first class booth for themselves, fit with a room for them to sleep in. She did not want to go through a normal flight with both babies being this moody, it would prove to be disastrous.

Once at the airport they said their greetings to Casey who would be taking their car back home. They went through customs before boarding the plane and heading straight into the room booked for them. Olivia laid Madison down on the bed and changed her diaper while Trevor sat back and tried to rock a very moody Noah to sleep. They were exhausted as both babies had been moody for the last two days, throwing all kinds of tantrums.

Olivia moved to lay down on one side of the bed and hummed softly, her hand gently rubbing Madison's back to calm her down. She looked up at her mother through tired eyes, a smile on her lips, and let out a soft cooing noise before shoving her thumb into her mouth. Olivia pressed a soft kiss to her daughters head, letting out a soft laugh when she let out a tired grunt and scrunched up her face.

Noah on the other hand had not stopped crying, his cheeks were a deep shade of red while thick beady tears rolled down them, his blue eyes squeezed shut. His chubby hands were curled up into fists as he cried for his mother, his father was at a loss for words.

He tried to get his son to calm down but the little one wanted nothing to do with it, he screamed as his father rocked him. Trevor let out a breath "Noah please, calm down..."

He looked up at his father with teary eyes "I go mamma"

Olivia let out a soft sigh before walking over to where her husband stood, she pressed a kiss to his shoulder before reaching for the crying tot. She pressed a kiss to his forehead before rocking him gently, a loving smile on her lips.

He sat down on the bed and looked at his wife in wonder as his son stopped crying and let out a tired giggle when his wife pulled a face at him. He was amazed at how quickly she had gotten the little one to calm down, she always seemed to leave him speechless.

The rest of their flight was peaceful, both little ones settled in well and their parents even got a few minutes of adult time. The crying and tantrums had stopped since their five hour naps, leaving both little ones back to their normal bubbly selves. Everything went smoothly from there, they landed safely in New York and quickly made it through all of the airport activities.

Olivia let out a breath of relief when they finally made it out of the airport and found Thomas waiting for them. She carried both babies, while Trevor carried their luggage to the trunk of the car. Thomas had prepared for them and got two car seats for both babies, he helped Olivia strap both babies in before getting into the drivers seat.

Trevor lifted Olivia's chin and pressed a soft kiss to her lips, a smile pulling at his lips when he pulled away "I have been wanting to do that all morning."

"honey you can kiss me anytime you want, I would never deny you." she smiled before giving him a chaste kiss "but we may have to stop for now so that your brother can take us to where ever it is we are going."

Trevor sighed before helping her into the car and closing the door behind her, he settled in the passenger seat and smirked when he heard Noah bubbling on in gibberish "still working on those talking skills huh champ?"

"bubba?" Noah asked, a yawn falling from his lips. He looked up at his mother and rubbed his eyes, and groaned before stretching his chubby arms out to her.

Olivia pressed a kiss to his head before ruffling his unruly hair "Noah baby you know how it goes, you have to stay in the car seat and I can't give you a bottle because I didn't get a chance to pump on the plane."

Thomas smirked "time really flew by huh, those two are getting bigger each time I see them."

"Yeah times are flying by... How's mom doing?" Trevor asked.

"She's okay, excited to see you both, she knows the twins are coming and she is dying to meet them."

"How long will we be staying with your mother?" Olivia asked, a smile on her face as she played with Noah's hair, slowly lulling him to sleep. Madison was fast asleep in her car seat, having exhausted herself with playing with her father on their flight.

"Just a few days while they do the finishing touches on our holiday house" Trevor responded, watching as his mother's house came into view.

They rushed into the house and got set up in one of the bedrooms with the help of Mary and Thomas. Both babies slept peacefully in the cots Mary had bought for them while Olivia and Trevor took a relaxing bath.

Olivia smirked as she relaxed in his embrace "this is lovely... Just you and I"

He kissed the side of her head, entwinnig their fingers "it really is lovely. We have a date tomorrow night, I got us reservations at a little restaurant nearby and there after we can go see a movie or do something we haven't done in a while."

"What about the kids?" she sighed "I don't mean to be a bitch but they don't know your mother and you know how fussy they get when we aren't around, or when we leave them with other people. Casey, Eva and Alex have been there since birth and even Thomas will have to give them warming up time."

He ran his hands down her arms in a soothing manner "Liv relax, they have the entire day to warm up to my mother, and we won't be leaving until after 7 which is when they usually knock out."

"I don't know..."

"Liv please, I am trying to do something for us here, to get our marriage back on track."

"Trevor we are on track, we have been on track for months" she sighed out.

He shooed his head "are we really Olivia? Because it does not feel that way to me. I miss you and I want to spend time with you, seeing you smiling and laughing again, I want us to go back to the way we used to be. Where you were carefree and happy, not this. We are okay but we're not happy and it's because we are both being overwhelmed with all of these changes."

"Change can be good. It's what brought us together."

"I know that, but lately it has not been good, all of this change is ripping us apart. You got the precinct open and you became so overworked that even sitting with the kids became difficult because you were tired. I was overworked too, and we took it out on each and started pointless arguments. I don't want that for us because it will destroy us, and I love you too damn much to lose you because of something as small as timing."

A massive smile tugged at her lips and she turned to face him, wrapping her arms around him "you are right and I am glad to have a husband as caring as you are. I don't want to lose you either babe, I love you and I admit we have been struggling lately."

She let out a soft giggle, pressing a kiss to his lips "I would love to go on a date with you Mr Langan."

"I am very happy to hear that Mrs Langan, I will be picking you up around seven pm." he caressed her cheek "I love you, beautiful."

"I love you too, handsome." she pulled him impossibly closer and smirked into their kiss "now, let's get out of this water and move to that massive bed. I want our first time making love in New York to be comfortable and long, we won't last long if we stay in here and there isn't much space in here."

He helped her up and wrapped a towel around her, pushing a piece of her hair behind her ear "your wish is my command."

He suddenly grabbed hold of her hand and pulled her into their bedroom, gently pushing onto the bed. Her laughter could be heard throughout the room as he hovered over her, his lips inches away from hers and his hands on either side of her. The laughter quickly faded and became light, breathy moans when his lips attached to the skin of her neck. He made a slow trail of kisses toward her breath and smirked when he heard the delicious sounds that fell from her lips.

Trevor felt her body tense up when he began kissing the soft skin of her breast and gently ran a hand up her thigh "relax baby, let me take care of you."

She bit her lip and nodded "okay..." she let out a soft squeal when he took her nipple into his mouth "Trevor don't tease me" she moaned.

He chuckled softly against her skin before kissing his way down her stomach "yes ma'am."

When he finally reached his destination he looked up at her and shot her a quick smirk before allowing his tongue to flick at her most sensitive parts. A gasp of surprise and pleasure tore from her and she quickly bit her lip, feeling him set his movements into a rhythm. Her hand flew down and tugged at the short hair on his head, a silent plea for more, she knew her words would be useless now so she spoke to him with little motions.

He read her like a book, speeding up his movements when she tugged his hair, knowing that she needed more. He held her thighs apart and ate her as if she was the last meal on earth, leaving her panting and writhing in pleasure. Her eyes were squeezed shut and her knuckles were whitened as one of her hands gripped the sheets beneath them. Her back arched with every swipe of his tongue, and she her soft pains were starting to turn into little squeals, she was trying her best to stay quite, but he was making that simple task impossible.

A strangled moan and a squeal tore from her lips as she fell over the edge, her climax ripping through her entire being. Her legs shook around his shoulders as he lapped up every single drop of her release, moaning at the taste he could never get enough of. Her body shook slightly as she pulled him up and pulled his lips toward hers, a deep moan leaving her lips when she tasted herself on his tongue.

"Liv, we need to be quiet" he whispered with a chuckle.

She pushed him onto his back and smirked "I'll try, but I need you... Inside me, now Trevor!"

"your wish is my command beautiful" he said before thrusting upwards and entering her in one swift motion.

She choked back a moan and bit her lip hard to keep herself quiet "fuck" she hissed.

Her hips rolled against his in a fast and steady motion, both of them panting softly at the feeling of finally getting to make love without worrying about the kids waking up. She threw her head back and squealed softly when he gripped her ass, his lips attaching to the skin of her neck. Her hands wrapped around his shoulders and her nails dug into the skin of his back, leaving angry red marks in their wake.

Both of them were soon covered in a sheen of sweat, the only light in the room came from the moonlight that shone through the thin bedroom curtains. The light gave them an ethereal glow as they moved together, both of them close to their inevitable orgasms.

Olivia leaned forward and bit down on his shoulder when she felt her inner walls convulsing, her orgasm hitting her harder than she thought it would. She let out a low squeal, gripping the sheets as she came undone, her juices coating him, within seconds she felt him swell up inside of her and then just as soon she felt his release.

Trevor held onto her body, pushing into her while his came undone, feeling her inner walls convulsing around him again. He groaned and pulled her face toward his own, giving her a deep kiss.

She broke their kiss when air became necessary and panted "fuck... That was incredible." she crashed onto him.

Trevor ran his hand up her back and pressed a kiss to her forehead "I missed this." he gently lifted her chin, pressing his lips to hers.

"Now I need to sle-" she started but stopped when she heard a cry coming from the baby monitor.

She flopped onto her back and let out a loud groan "why do they hate me?"

Trevor let out a laugh "they don't hate you babe. I'll go get them for a feed."

She nodded "yeah"

He got up and slipped into a sweatpants before walking out of the bedroom, he made his way toward the room his mother set up for the twins and smirked when he saw Thomas in the room with a sniffling Noah in his arms.

He leaned up against the doorway and smirked at his brother "where's Maddi?"

"Mom has her in the kitchen, she went to get the milk Olivia pumped earlier." he smirked while gently rocking Noah "we thought you two were asleep, so we figured you two could use the rest and we would keep an eye on these two."

Trevor chuckled "I'm surprised they are so calm, usually they freak out if anybody that isn't Olivia holds them before bedtime. Even I get kicked out sometimes"

Thomas gently rubbed Noah's back "these guys are super chilled, look, Noah is practically asleep right now."

He looked at his son whose eyes were slightly drooped "you're right, he's going to be out in a few minutes. I'm going to take those spare bottles to the room because Liv needs to pump and then I'll head to bed. Are you sure you want to stay up with them?"

"Trev, these are my nephews and nieces. I love them almost as much as you do" he said with a smile, "I like spending time with them and I missed them so these few moments are what I look forward to."

He nodded before walking over and pressing a kiss to Noah's forehead "sleep well champ."

Noah looked up at his father and gave off a sleepy smile "dadda"

He chuckled slightly "yep that's me." he pressed another kiss to the little boys head "you be good for uncle Tommy, okay?"

"No" he said before yawning and laying his head back on Thomas' shoulder.

Thomas laughed softly "is he not too young to be this full of crap?"

"apparently not." Trevor laughed before heading downstairs.

He took hold of the two empty bottles and smirked when he saw his mother holding a very grump Madison, he walked up to her and pressed a kiss to his mother's cheek before kissing his daughters forehead.

She looked up at her father and allowed a small smile to cover her lips "mamma?"

Trevor let out a laugh "no, no baby, it's daddy."

She let out a small giggle before yawning, she rubbed her eyes with her chubby hands and groaned before letting out a soft whimper.

Mary shook her head "say goodnight to your daddy"

Trevor pressed another soft kiss to his daughters forehead "goodnight princess."

Mary carried the little girl to the nursary upstairs and sat down to give her the bottle of milk that her mother pumped for them.

Trevor made his way upstairs and walked into the room where he found Olivia asleep. He settled down beside her and allowed a smile to grace his lips when she moved closer to him. She cuddled into his arms and held him close while letting out a soft snore.

He let out a chuckle "you're as tired as the kids"

"sleep" she mumbled out before groaning.

He ran his hand down her back, soothing her somewhat "shh beautiful, don't fight it."

She mumbled some more before falling into a deep sleep. Trevor lined up the two empty bottles on his bedside table before ensuring that the monitor was still on. He settled back down beside his wife and kissing the top of her head gently before allowing sleep to take over his body. They were finally in the big city and their trip was already off to a good start.


	41. Chapter 41

**Happy.**

Olivia stirred when she heard a soft giggling sound coming from beside her. She forced her heavy eyelids open and immediately started smiling when she saw Trevor resting beside her with Madison and Noah crawling about on the bed. She reached for her little girl and pulled her close, pressing a series of kisses to her chubby cheeks.

Madison let out a happy squeal before pressing a wet, sloppy kiss to her mother's cheek. Causing a loud laugh to leave Olivia's lips, she moved the little girl away and checked her mouth "you have a little tooth"

Trevor furrowed his eyebrows "Noah has two, did hers finally come out."

"Yeah, she bit my cheek" she chuckled "I thought she wanted to kiss me."

Trevor laughed softly "great so now we're going to have two tiny humans biting us at any given time."

Noah crawled into his father's arms and pressed his hands to his father's cheeks, he squealed happily when his father began blowing raspberries at him. He let out loud, hearty giggles and threw his head back, his nose scrunching up much like his mother's.

Olivia smirked and sat up, moving Madison to her breast, she let out a laugh when she latched on hungrily and sighed in relief. She looked over at her bubbling son "Noah do you want to drink?"

He looked over at her and pursed his lips "no mamma" he said before laying down beside his father.

He took hold of Trevor's hand and began aimlessly playing with his dad's fingers, seeming shocked by how big his hands were. Trevor reached down and tickled the little boy who giggled happily.

Olivia smoothed Madison's curly hair down "your brother is so loud, don't you think Princess?"

She moved away from her mother's breast and nodded "uh huh" she said before once again focusing on drinking the breastmilk her mother so lovingly provided her with. Noah settled beside his father and laid silently while staring at the television that hung opposite the bed.

Their morning was spent peacefully in bed, laughing and spending time with both little ones, and getting the family time they didn't have much of in Oregon. When the twins hit their five month mark Trevor's firm finally took off and Olivia had successfully opened up Oregon's very first rape crisis centre and got approval for Oregon's Special Victims Unit to be opened. It had been a number of changes and tasks that they had to take on as a family but they made it through, and they finally managed to squeeze in three weeks vacation time to get out here to their family.

After a few relaxing hours they made their way downstairs and spent some time with Thomas who was showing Trevor the pictures of their holiday house. Noah and Madison were asleep in their baby swings and Olivia was on the phone with Eva and Casey who were complaining about missing her and the kids.

Thomas smirked when he noticed that Trevor was no longer looking at the pictures of the house, but rather at his wife who sat opposite him. He nudged his older brother gently "hey asshole, stop drooling and focus on the works."

Trevor let out a chuckle "can you blame me... She's perfect"

"that she is. I'm happy for you Trev, you found the right one for you, plus you got two awesome kiddos out of it. It's a bonus that they are really cute too" he said before getting up and moving to the kitchen.

He got up and followed his brother into the kitchen and took the beer Thomas offered him, he took a swig before moving around the kitchen to prepare a light meal for them "so how are things going with you and Eva?"

"I don't know honestly. I have been trying to get hold of her for a while but she hasn't responded which is giving me a bad feeling." he said with a sigh "last I saw her, everything was perfect and now she won't even return my calls."

"did you do anything that you can remember?" he asked before taking out a waffle press.

He shook his head "no."

Trevor sighed before lowering his voice "I'll ask Liv if she knows anything later when we're alone."

"Do you think Liv might know?" he asked.

"know what?" Olivia asked as she walked into the kitchen. She narrowed her eyes when both men cleared their throats and went to working on the breakfast instantly.

She pursed her lips "are we keeping secrets now?"

Trevor sighed "no we are not keeping secrets, Thomas and I are just having a brother to brother moment." he walked over to her, lifting her chin to press a kiss to her lips.

She stopped him by placing her hand infront of her mouth "don't lie to me and then try to kiss me."

Thomas chuckled "you wanted a smart woman, this is the price you pay." he smirked at Olivia "we were speaking about Eva, she hasn't been responding to my calls or texts... I was wondering if you had any idea why?"

She shook her head "I don't know, but I will try my best to find out. I have to go now though, I'm meeting Alex for lunch, will you be able to watch the kids?"

He wrapped his arms around her waist and nodded "yes I'll be able to keep an eye on our kids... Don't forget that we have a date tonight." he whispered before leaning down and giving her a deep kiss.

A soft moan left her lips as her arms wrapped around his shoulders, he was doing this on purpose, he wanted to get her riled up and it was working. He knew she wanted more when he felt her fisting up the material of his shirt, her tongue exploring his mouth with desperation. She squeezed her thighs together to ward off the heat that began stirring in her core.

Trevor pulled her closer, completely forgetting that his brother was in the kitchen, trying his absolute best to not face their direction while finishing up the breakfast. He deepened their kiss and moved one of his hands downwards, stopping to give her ass a firm squeeze. He felt her hand fumbling with his belt and gently took hold of her hand to stop her, easing out of their kiss in the process.

She let out a heavy breath and bit her lip, looking at him with hungry eyes. Trevor shook his head "as much as I want to drag you upstairs and finish what we started, I can't, because you have to go see Alex."

"You knew we wouldn't be able to finish yet you still got me riled up... Jackass" she quipped.

He let out a hearty laugh before giving her another soft kiss "I will see you later and then after our date we can get back to this... I will make up for this, I promise."

She nodded "I can live with that."

A massive smile spread on her lips "I have to go, I love you." she gave him another quick kiss.

He smirked against her lips "I love you too"

Thomas groaned before pushing them apart "you two are like horny teenagers, the longer you kiss, the longer Alex will be waiting and that means you will get back later than planned, then you will go on your date later, get home later and that will delay the sex you want at the end of the night."

Olivia pursed her lips "okay, okay I'm going. Take care of my babies and make sure they know that momma loves them."

"They already know that babe. We will see you soon, now go and have fun." Trevor said with a warm smile.

Olivia went into the living room and kissed the sleeping babies, gently caressing their chubby cheeks. She took a minute to admire them, they were the most adorable humans she had ever laid eyes on. They were identical in every sense of the word, both had her nose and her mouth, yet they had their father's ocean eyes, completed with the green specs. She allowed her hands to gently caress their faces before letting out a giggle when she felt someone slap her ass.

She straightened up and turned to see Trevor looking at her with a raised eyebrow "I was saying goodbye... But I got a bit side tracked by how adorable they are."

He laughed softly "Olivia you're only going for lunch, these two will be fine." he pressed a soft kiss to her forehead "now go and enjoy your time with Alex... I will see you later"

She nodded before giving him a chaste kiss "I'm going to ask them a full report of everything that happened when I get back, so you and Thomas better behave."

Trevor shook his head at her "then it's a good thing that their talking skills aren't all that great yet."

...

"Livvie!" Alex exclaimed when she saw her friend, they had not seen each other for over a month and she missed her dearly.

Olivia let out a hearty laugh when Alex pulled her into a tight hug, she missed this and she knew that this was going to be a regular occurance over the next three weeks. She let go of her friend and sat down, shooting her a smirk "so how have you been?"

She shrugged "I have been busy, I thought this case would be opened and closed, but it's gotten way too complicated and now everything is a mess... How have you been holding up, with all the changes going on?"

Olivia ordered a milkshake for herself and rolled her eyes at Alex who was laughing at her beveragechoice "I am good... The kids are getting bigger each day and naughtier, but I love them dearly, and Trevor... Well he is a dream, I love that man so damn much, he is everything to me and he's been so supportive with the precinct and the centre, I don't deserve him."

Alex narrowed her eyes when she saw Olivia's eyes filling with tears "Liv, are you crying?"

She let out a laugh and wiped her tears "happy tears. I've been very emotional lately, but that is because I've been spoilt, I was so content with spending my days with the babies and Trevor that going to work has become so hard for me. I don't want to leave their side."

"Then why don't you just stay at home?" she asked with a shrug, "you guys can afford it and Trevor would not mind you wanting to stay home to take care of your kids."

She shook her head "I don't want to... I like working, I just have to get back into the swing of things. It takes time, we're falling into a new routine."

"Makes sense. How has work been going? Casey told me that you have entire squad and everything already"

Olivia thanked the waitress that brought her milkshake and their meals before turning back to Alex, "Everything happened so fast, I have a squad that depend on me to make all of these decisions and a centre where we have trained at least five other rape councilors, to help speak to the survivors. We had a massive event last month, to introduce the centre to the people and everybody came by, the place was packed. It was a wonderful evening and we have been busy ever since, the amount of people who have been dealing with trauma and bottling it up is insane."

"And have you finally revealed your real identities to the people around you?"

She nodded "yes, we had a little house party at Casey's place because ours was strewn with toys and baby crap. So Casey suggested her place and we invited all of our neighbours and a few extended friends and told them the truth. Aiden was pissed."

She laughed "Why?"

"Because he realised that Trevor and I weren't married when we arrived, finding out that I was single pissed him off because he felt that he would have stood a chance." she explained with a laugh, "I had to sit him down and explain that I would not have given him a chance because I always had feelings for Trevor."

Alex smirked "and how are you and Trevor doing? Everything sorted?"

A massive smile tugged at her lips "We are great, we managed to sort all our issues out. We sat and spoke out all of our thoughts, we voiced our concerns. Then we had some amazing sex and moved forward, we have a date tonight" she said with a soft squeal.

Alex raised her eyebrows "you're acting like a giddy teenager, it's cute."

She let out a giggle "I just, I really love him and its great to have someone that loves me too, someone that isn't afraid to show it." she bit her lip.

Alex shook her head at her friend and smiled, it was obvious that Olivia was happy, it was practically bursting out of her. She had a massive smile on her lips and her eyes sparkled with happy tears, she looked so good. Alex took in her appearance as she ate and smirked when she saw her friend was glowing, she had never seen Olivia this carefree and bubbly. It was infectious.

...

Trevor chuckled when Madison wobbled over to him on unsteady legs "hey princess, aren't you a bit to young to be walking about?"

She looked at her father with wide eyes and let out a laugh while standing up against the coffee table. Her blue eyes were filled with wonder as she stood and looked over at her brother who sat on the carpet, beside her, his eyes focused on the bright colored toys that his grandmother had bought them.

Noah took hold of one of the trucks and raised it up to his father "dadda"

He moved to sit down beside his little boy, taking the truck and pushing it across the floor, which caused Noah to squeal in excitement.

"You like that kiddo?" he asked.

Noah took the truck and crawled into his father's lap "uh huh"

"Madi be careful" he said when he saw her trying to dance while holding onto the coffee table.

She had started taking unsteady steps a few days prior, leaving both of her parents shocked and amazed. She was the youngest of the twins but she was much more advanced than her brother, he was way more laid back. Madison was their little adventurer and Noah was the calm one, he just wanted to be around his parents and enjoy his time with them, whereas his little sister wanted to see everything around her. This was surprising to both Trevor and Olivia because Madison was the shy one, Noah was more talkative and open to new people. Madison preferred to be surrounded by people she knew, and was comfortable enough to be quirky around.

Olivia came downstairs and bit her lip when she saw her husband sitting with their kids, it was a sight she would never tire of. He always looked so happy with the kids, she wondered if he would want more little ones soon. She was snapped out of her thoughts when she felt a little arm wrap around her leg, she looked down to Madison who had crawled over to her and was smiling up at her.

She reached down and scooped the little girl into her arms, pressing a ton of kisses to her rosey cheeks. Small giggles escaped her little lips and soon her arms wrapped around her mother's neck, giving her a cuddle. Olivia held her little girl and sniffled softly "I love you princess."

Noah looked up at the sound of his mother's voice and gave her a toothy grin "mamma" he acknowledged her presence before cuddling further into his father's arms.

Olivia sat down beside her husband, a smile on her lips "hey kiddos, will you two be okay to stay with grandma and uncle Tommy? Daddy and I have to leave in the next twenty minutes."

Noah looked up at her and pursed his lips before shaking his head "I go?"

"No son, you and Madi are staying here." Trevor explained, watching the expression of the eleven month old.

Madison took hold of the locket on her mother's neck "mamma go."

"Yes princess... You and Noah have to behave okay?" she asked.

Noah nodded "otay" he took hold of his pacifier and chewed at it before looking up at his parents.

Olivia chuckled at the look of realisation that washed over the little boys face, he took hold of his father's hand and gave him a sweet smile.

Trevor was slightly confused at what his son was doing but he didn't bother to question him, he silently watched the boy who his hand and moved it to his mother's hand.

"I think he just realised that we're together" Olivia teased before taking hold of her husbands hand.

Noah looked at their joint hands and blew a raspberry at his parents before giggling "I go." he said before crawling out of his father's arms.

Olivia shook her head at him "you confuse me Noah Langan, but I love you"

He turned back to her and let out a squeal "love mamma"

Trevor gasped "did he just say he loves you?"

Olivia let out a sob and nodded "get your butt over here kid."

He crawled into his mother's arms happily, squealing when she kissed the top of his head. Madison looked and gently pulled her brother toward her and wrapped her arms around him.

Trevor smirked "you love your brother huh?"

She nodded "yeah"

Mary walked into the livingroom and furrowed her eyebrows when she saw Olivia crying while Trevor laughed with the little ones "Olivia are you okay?"

Olivia nodded and wiped her tears "yes I am... Noah said he loves me" she let out a sob "I didn't expect to get this emotional, but I'm just really happy."

Mary let out a laugh "I know that feeling all too well. He's a charmer, like his dad. Trevor told me he loves me for the very first time on his first birthday, and I cried too. He had fallen and scraped his knee, and I fixed him up and gave him a few cuddles, he then looked up at me with those blue eyes and told me that he loves me."

Trevor smirked before pressing a kiss to the side of his wife's head "I can't remember that, but I am sure I meant it, and I know this little guy meant it too."

Mary leaned up against the wall and smirked "I'm proud of you two... I know I don't say it much and I was a bitch in the beginning, but seeing you both now, I am very happy that you fought me and stuck together. I was wrong about you Olivia and I should have given you both a chance. I am so sorry"

Olivia handed the little ones over to her husband and walked up to Mary, pulling her in for a hug "there's no need to apologise, you had every reason to act the way you did. I know you were just looking out for Trevor and I don't judge you for that, because I would do anything to protect my own kids too."


	42. Chapter 42

**Date Night.**

Olivia followed Trevor over to the table that he had booked for them, she had a bright smile on her face and she was excited to see where the night would lead. They had gotten both babies bathed and fed before leaving for their date, Thomas and Mary were excited to have a movie night with the tots.

Trevor smirked as he looked back at his wife and saw her smiling, she looked absolutely gorgeous tonight and he could not keep his eyes off her. She wore a baggy navy blue dress, that matched his suit, they were matching from head to toe and it was adorable. She was glowing and he noticed that her skin had an ethereal shine to it recently, but he noticed that something was different with her.

She seemed nervous and he noticed it, she had been acting off for a while now and he wanted to get to the bottom of it, but he was not going to push her. He pulled her seat out for her and pushed it back in once she was seated, they had gotten a table in a secluded corner, giving them the alone time they needed. The table was beautifully decorated and had a candle lit in the centre of it, and it smelt of fresh flowers and a very soft vinella scent.

Trevor was about to order a bottle of wine for them, but stopped when she placed her hand over his "everything okay babe?"

She nodded "yes, this is perfect... But uhm" she swallowed the lump in her throat "I am not really feeling for wine. You can have some, but I want juice."

"Are you sure?" he asked, confused by her sudden dislike of wine.

"yeah... I'm still breastfeeding the babies so I decided to not drink alcohol until they are on formula" she explained with a warm smile.

"Makes sense. I'm sorry babe, I didn't even think about that".

She smiled up at the young waiter "actually I think I will have a glass of water, Trev you want a drink?"

He shook his head "I'll have some water too."

The waiter nodded before walking off, leaving the couple to talk. Olivia let out a breath "so I called Eva this afternoon while Alex and I were out... She said that she's dealing with a few things and is going to speak to him as soon as she is able to clear up her thoughts."

Trevor scoffed "he's hurt Liv. I watched him try to call her, he really cares for her and he keeps making excuses as to why she isn't responding."

She took hold of his hand "we can give her a call later and speak to her a bit more, but I don't want to pry too much."

"Nope... No calls tonight, we are going to enjoy our meals and do anything we want, and then we're going home, checking up on our kids and then I'm taking you to our bedroom and making love to you until the sun comes up." he said with a smirk.

She squeezed her legs together, she felt her body reacting to his authoritive tone, biting her lip seductively. Suddenly all she wanted was to tease him "what if I just wanted to get an early night?"

He shrugged "then I would have to settle for a quick taste before you went to bed..." he lowered his voice, leaning closer to her "I could do with a midnight snack and you are my favourite meal."

Her womanhood throbbed as she listened to him, his voice was low, his eyes were sparkling and he had a preditory look on his face. She had never been scared of him, and even now, as dominating as his tone was, she still was not scared. Instead it made her want to test his limits, because she knew, if she riled him up enough, he would take her once they got home and he would give her a thorough fucking to whip her into submission. It was exactly what she wanted from him, she wanted ruthless sex, and she was going to get it.

She shrugged and took a sip of her water, ordering her food as if she was unphased by his words that was still hanging in the air between them. She finished reciting her order before turning back to her smirking husband, once the young waiter trotted off, she pursed her lips.

"favourite meal huh?" she smirked "to bad the restaurant is closed."

He groaned "well if I can't taste you, I could always touch you. Make you cum with nothing but my hands, my lips on your neck, sucking at it."

She shrugged "or I could take a shower and lock the bathroom door and not let you in."

"You're being difficult to get me riled up aren't you?" he questioned, narrowing his eyes at her.

She let out a soft giggle "I would never do that. It doesn't take much to rile you up, and if I really wanted to I would just do this-" she ran her foot up his leg at a painfully slow pace.

Stopping when the tip of her open toed shoe touched the bulge in his pants, a gasp leaving her lips "it seems you already are riled up counselor."

He groaned, fighting to keep his resolute strong, he wanted nothing more than to clear off the table and fuck her right there, but he knew she would never let that happen. She was enjoying this too much and he could see it, she loved watching him squirm beneath her touch.

Olivia shot him an innocent smile when she saw the flushed look on his face, she knew that he wanted her and she was going to use it to her advantage. She took another sip of her water, swallowing slowly, watching his eyes that followed her every move.

It was as if he was in a trance, watching her lift the glass toward her luscious lips and take a sip in a way that made him want to kiss her. His eyes flowed toward her neck, watching her throat move as she swallowed the water, and just as suddenly his mind was filled with images of her on her knees with him between her lips. He had to fight hard to restrain himself, his dick standing hard at just the thought of her, he knew that he was not going to win this fight. The only thing keeping him at bay was the prying eyes of the people around them, yet he knew that eventually he would not be able to stay calm.

She raised an eyebrow at his now flushed face "are you okay darling? you're looking a little flushed."

"Oh I'm fine, but you won't be when I'm done with you" he shot back, watching her bite her lip.

She too was fighting to stay restrained, when the truth was that she wanted nothing more than to have him ripping off her dress and filling her to the hilt. Her panties were pretty much useless at this point, she was throbbing for him, in fact she had no idea how she was going to walk out of the restaurant while her core was on fire.

"well then I look forward to tonight" she smirked "But we should really change the subject."

"Why?" he pouted.

She let out a laugh at his expression before shaking her head "because I'm getting all worked up and not getting a release until we get home... I can't handle a wait that long, and if we keep talking about it, I will need to get to a toilet to relieve myself."

He raised an eyebrow at her, her admission peeked his interest "You have been very horny lately, is there something going on?"

She rolled her eyes "no. I'm going to get my period soon and I just get really worked up a few days before it. So you talking and not touching is like torture to me."

"I will take care of you as soon as we leave, for now though, how are feeling about being in New York again?"

"So far it has been great, Alex and I are taking the kids to Central Park tomorrow afternoon, just to get the kids out of the house a bit. I want to swing around to the precinct as well, maybe I could go there tomorrow as well."

"Why don't you wait till we're settled in and then invite the squad over for dinner, so that they can meet the twins in the comfort of our home. It would be better for the kids too because that way they wouldn't be bombarded with all of these new things." he took hold of her hand "I could cook us all a lovely meal and we could all talk over dinner."

She smirked at the thought, nodding "that is a great idea actually... That way Noah and Madi won't be overwhelmed with all the new faces"

"Yeah and we both know how cranky they can get." he said with a knowing look.

"Don't remind me" she laughed "Our flight here was the worst, I have never seen those two misbehave like that. Noah cried throughout half of the flight and Maddi cried for the other half, I was so glad you got us a flight with a private section."

He nodded "let's not forget the drive to the airport, they really went all out to drive us insane."

"hopefully they will be knocked out when we get back, because if not they are going to be super moody." she sighed.

He checked the time on his watch and nodded "yeah, it's way past their bedtime."

She let out a laugh "I miss them. We've only been here for two hours and I feel like it's been a lifetime away from them."

He took hold of her hand that rested on table "I miss them too. We should probably head home if you're ready"

"Yeah, although I want to order some chocolate mousse to go." she bit her lip "two orders. Double thick"

"Anything you want babe" he kissed the back of her hand.

Olivia ordered their dessert before taking his hand and following him to the front of the restaurant, she allowed him to help her into her coat before stepping out into the evening air. Trevor stopped and pulled her close as they stood outside "I had a wonderful night with you, I just wish we had more time, I wanted to take you to a movie"

She cupped his cheek "we have the rest of our lives. I really enjoyed tonight too, I love spending time with you, but I miss our babies, I want to see them..." she bit her lip "and maybe if you behave, we could explore all those things we spoke about at the beginning of the night."

"Well then what are we waiting for, let's go." he said before leading her to their car. He opened the door for her with a loving smile "you hated when I did this in North Carolina. Always used to complain about knowing how to work a door."

She chuckled "honey I was heart broken because we had to just pick up and leave, I was an emotional mess." she bit her lip "but you handled me well, and the whole situation."

She took his hand as he got settled in the drivers seat, she gave it a squeeze "We learnt a lot out there, we learnt to work together and play out our roles as a couple."

"Most days I wondered would it be the day you finally had enough and walked out of that place. I feared that you would snap and break Bethany's nose, or knock her out cold."

"I had to fight myself to stay calm, she really rubbed me up the wrong way. Everytime I saw her face I wanted to beat the shit out of her, not to mention when we first met Sandy, she openly flirted with you and all I wanted was to break her jaw." she chuckled "But now that we have come this far, I know that no matter who tries what, you will always be by my side."

"Aww you like me" he teased before leaning in to press a deep kiss to her lips.

She broke their kiss after a moment and gave him a small smile "I don't like you, I love you."

"I love you too beautiful." he kissed the back of her hand "now let's get back to our little rascals."


	43. Chapter 43

**Squad Room.**

"When are you going to tell Trevor?" Alex asked as she bounced the little girl in her arms.

Olivia took the car that Noah tried to push into his mouth and shook her head "I don't know... I'm thinking about it. We've been going through a lot lately and I just feel like it's not the right time to dump this on him."

Alex scoffed "Liv, he would love this news..."

"I know and I'm going to tell him when I'm ready" she sighed "for now I just want to focus on these two and their growth."

"They are growing too fast if you ask me, look at them, just yesterday they were born and now they are bubbling on and learning to stand and walk." Alex smiled.

Olivia nodded "Noah hasn't mastered any of the two yet, but Madison is well on her way to walking, she can stand on her own and walks up against the furniture."

Madison took that as a signal to show off her standing skills, she squealed and hassled about to be placed on the ground by her aunt. Alex noticed the squirming little girl and gently placed her on the ground, she let out a chuckle as Madison clapped her hands in excitement.

The little girl smiled up at the older woman before taking two steps toward her mother, she giggled before taking her mothers hand "mamma see?"

Olivia laughed before leaning down to kiss both of Madi's cheeks "I see you princess, you are walking. Momma is proud"

Noah looked up and smirked "Sissa"

Alex chuckled "aww he is so sweet, he wants her to play with him."

She sat back as Madison moved over to Noah and the two set to playing with the few park friendly toys that their mother brought along. Olivia kept her eyes on them as she watched both little ones play peacefully.

"They have this weird bond, they are pretty much inseparable, you have to see them when it's bedtime. They refuse to sleep without each other, like they have separate cribs but we have to put them together so that they can fall asleep. We move them once they are both completely knocked out." she explained with a massive smile.

Alex smirked "I can only imagine what bathtime must be like. I've missed out on so much simply because I had to come back here for this fucking stupid case."

"How is that going by the way?" she asked cautiously.

Alex sat back and let out a heavy sigh "it's complete crap, I miss Casey and I missed you so damn much Liv." she took Olivia's hand and squeezed it gently "How have you been?"

"I have been good... I was worried about you though, after everything that happened, you just up and left and then I didn't hear anything for a while." she let out a sigh, looking up at her blonde haired friend.

Alex bit her lip nervously "I'm sorry Liv, I know I was an idiot for just leaving you like that and not sticking around to support you. Plus I didn't even believe you at first"

She pursed her lips "I didn't tell anybody, because I knew that it would tear my marriage apart. Trevor would be really hurt to find out that his partner kissed me, he would probably kill Henshall and divorce me."

"I don't know what came over me, just seeing him like that with you, was enough to piss me off. You didn't deserve that hit and I am so sorry for it. I just hope that you can tell Trevor eventually, because if Henshall brings it up, he is going to be torn."

"Trevor knows that I love him, and that there is nobody else for me. I haven't told him because we have been extremely busy, but I want to tell him eventually... I've learnt the hard way that keeping secrets are bullshit, they ruin relationships." she shook her head "I know he is going to be pissed but I hope he can forgive me."

She nudged Alex's shoulders "it's going to be okay, you saw that I was telling the truth and I know Trevor will too." She bit her lip, "are you and I good?"

She smirked "of course we are, I mean I was nervous to see you the other day, but it went well. Thank you, for not holding it against me."

"It's not like it was your fault, you walked in at the wrong time and you did that because you didn't want to see my marriage end." she quipped.

Alex chuckled "so you don't mind that I slapped you."

"nope, but only because you didn't slap me hard." she teased.

Alex felt her cheeks flush and shook her head "I'm really happy we fixed things because now when I go back I know there will be peace. Now I can see Casey and not have the thought of you hating me plaguing the back of my mind."

"I just hope she can forgive me for being away for so long and just up and leaving." she sighed, "what if she leaves me?"

"She won't, she loves you too damn much to let you go because of something this small." she assured her friend.

Alex sighed "I hope so, because I really don't want to lose her. I love her, like I'm insanely in love with her and just the thought of us being apart forever is physically painful."

"Aww babe, sounds like you've found the one" she smiled, pulling Alex in for a hug.

Alex laughed before pushing Olivia away "Shut up. You're the one that's all loved up and you have these two little bugs to prove it."

Olivia smiled down at the babies who were giggling as they pushed their big trucks about "these two make everyday better."

"Olivia Benson?" came a voice that approached them.

Olivia looked up at the woman and furrowed her eyebrows "Kathy?"

Kathy nodded "wow, it's good to see you, last I heard you were out in Oregon. How are you doing?"

"I am doing wonderful, how are you? Last I heard you were expecting, your baby has to be around or over a year old by now" she smiled.

Kathy let out a breath "yeah he recently hit the one year and five month mark... He is a ball of energy, complete daddies boy" she chuckled "he keeps me on my feet."

"I can imagine, I was actually going to the precinct a bit later to invite everybody over for dinner. You should join us, I'll give El the details." she offered before reaching down and picking Noah who began fussing for her attention.

Madison waddled over to Alex and let out a yawn, cuddling into her embrace. Olivia gently allowed Noah to cuddle into her embrace and pressed a kiss to the side of his head "It's close to nap time so I might have to get these two home first."

Kathy looked down at the twins and gasped "Elliot didn't mention that you have kids now."

Olivia pursed her lips "he doesn't know actually. Nobody knows, so I would appreciate it if you kept it quiet, I want everybody to meet them tonight."

Kathy nervously played with the wedding ring on her finger "they have blue eyes..." she bit her lip "don't take this the wrong way... But are they- did you..." she swallowed the lump in her throat "how old are they?"

Olivia knew exactly where Kathy's mind went, and she didn't blame her for thinking that. She shook her head "they are eleven months old, they are not Elliot's. He and I are nothing more than best friends, he was my partner, and I love him but I would never sleep with him, and he loves you too much to cross that line."

Kathy let out a heavy breath, the tension visibly leaving her body "I'm sorry for thinking like that, it's just that you two were always so close and when he heard that you had passed, he was distraught. That's when I realised how much you meant to him, and he admitted to loving you. It almost tore us apart."

She sniffled before continuing, "So when he found out you were alive and flew out to see you, I accepted that it might have been the end of my marriage. Then he came back and told me that you were doing well and you were happy. So seeing you with your kids made me worry for a second, because it could have been a possibility for you two to have slept together."

Olivia nodded, rocking the little boy gently "I understand, it would make sense, but I am happily married, Elliot was at my wedding but I asked him not to tell anyone." she gave Kathy a warm smile "I have to get these two home for their nap, but please do join us tonight."

Kathy nodded "I'll be there"

"Great, it was good seeing you again." she said before standing up and placing Noah in the double stroller. She packed the toys both kids were playing with into the bottom compartment of the stroller before strapping Madi in beside her brother.

"It was good seeing you again too Olivia, by the way, your babies are cute." Kathy smiled, giving her a brief hug and waving at Alex, before walking off to get her youngest from daycare.

Alex gave Olivia a hug and pressed a kiss to both babies head's "I will see you tonight, but for now I have to go drown myself in work again."

"I have to put these two down before going to face the squad" she smiled nervously "wish me luck."

"You won't need it, they missed you and they will be happy to see you." she nodded before walking to her car.

Olivia handed both babies their pacifiers before leaning down infront of them, she pressed a kiss to each of their cheeks "are you two ready to go to our new home and have a nap with daddy?"

"Uh huh" Both babies nodded before popping their paci's into their mouths.

Olivia chuckled "come on, let's go home."

...

She stood outside the precinct and let out a heavy breath, her nervous were all over the place and she had no idea what to expect. It had been almost two years since she last saw them face to face and she knew it was going to be an emotional experience. She steadied herself outside for a minute or two before finally stepping into the doors that she used to enter every day of her life.

The nostalgia hit her immediately, everything looked the same, it was as if she had never left. She stepped off the elevator and gasped when she saw the picture of herself that hung on the wall, she was clad in her uniform and was being honoured in as a Sargent, she smiled, seeing the picture she sent Cragen up on the wall.

She ran her fingers over the golden plate beneath the picture and read the words engraved into it.

Sgt. Olivia Benson. An officer of merit.

She smiled at the short sentence before making her way into the squad room, she stopped when she walked into the always busy room and smirked, she missed this place. She willed her feet to continue moving, making her way toward her old squad mates.

Fin was the first to look up and let out an audible gasp when he saw her, he jumped to his feet and rushed over to her, pulling her into a hug.

She let out a chuckle and hugged him back, her eyes instantly filling with tears "Hi Fin"

He held onto to her for a few more minutes before letting her go and smiling down at her "hey Liv, it's great to see you again. It's been forever since the last time you were here, what brought you back?"

"I missed you guys too much, I couldn't stay away any longer." she smirked "this place hasn't changed at all."

"Yeah it's still the same old around here, but I heard that you had a lot of changes" he nudged her "Sargent Benson."

She let out a hearty chuckle "yeah, I saw that Cragen had the picture I sent him put up in the hall. He could not believe that I managed to open up a precinct and get promoted up to Sargent on such short notice so I had to send him some photographic evidence."

He smirked "you did good Liv, we're all really proud of you. Even though we miss having you here"

She pursed her lips "I will come back eventually, but my journey in Oregon has barely began. Give it a few years and I'll be back to irritate you all again"

"Now that is something I look forward to" came a voice from behind her.

She turned to see John Munch standing there with a massive smile, she rushed over to him and pulled him into a massive hug "you missed me that much huh?"

He chuckled, nodding in agreement "I did, I thought I wouldn't see you again... You look great Benson, and happy."

She smiled up at him, stepping out of his embrace "I am very happy John, I cannot complain." she furrowed her brow "where's the rest of the squad?"

"Elliot and his new partner is in Cragen's office, you know how that goes. The other new guy, Amaro is in the bathroom and Barba is in court." Munch explained.

She smirked "Let me go and save Elliot from another speech from Cragen. I'll be out in a minute, and you two better be here."

Munch nodded "go save the day"

She made her way to Cragen's office and gently knocked on it.

Cragen tugged the door open in anger and scowled "Munch I said not to distu-" he stopped, seeing who was standing before him.

She smirked "I'm sorry to bother but I really needed to say hi"

He let out a heavy breath, a smile instantly covering his face "Liv."

She let out a contented sigh when he pulled her in for a fatherly hug, holding her close "I missed you cap"

"I missed you too Livvie" he said, feeling his eyes fill with tears "what are you doing here?"

She let go of his body and smiled up at him, wiping the tear that escaped her "I have been here for a few days now, I just didn't have the time to pop in sooner. I managed to scrape together some vacation time and decided to come visit you all."

"You've been here a few days and you're only visiting us now, what's been keeping you busy?" Elliot pipped up from behind Cragen.

"It would be much easier for me to show you the answer to that, but I might only be able to do that tonight." she answered, motioning for them to walk over to Fin's desk.

Once they were all gathered up, along with Elliots new partner and the new guy, she smiled at them "I would love to stay and catch up but I really have to go, however I did come by to invite you all over to my place. I have a few things I want to tell you all about and I want to know what you all have been up to while I was away."

Elliot nodded "I might have to check in with Kathy first to find out if she wants to join me."

"Oh there's no need, I ran into her this afternoon and already invited her. You two have to come along too, and please invite Barba" she while nodding at the new detectives.

The woman extended her hand to Olivia "The name is Amanda Rollins, and I will definitely be there. I've heard a number of stories and I need to find out which of them are true."

Olivia chuckled "now I'm nervous, because I know these guys have spoken a bunch of crap about me."

Fin scoffed "we would never."

The other guy smirked "I'm not too sure about that bit... I've heard some things too, about fighting perps."

She let out a hearty laugh "I did have my fair share of moments, but with good reason."

Cragen smirked "text us the address and the time and I'll be there."

Elliot nudged her "I wouldn't miss it."

Munch nodded in agreement "I can't wait to find out what's been keeping you away from us for so long."

She bit her lip nervously "yeah that part terrifies me."

"Now you're making me worry" Cragen added.

"It will be fine, I just worry about your reactions to everything." she admitted before taking her cellphone out of her pocket, she read a text from Trevor and sighed softly "I have to go."

* * *

**_A/N_**

**_So a lot is happening right now, Henshall kissed Olivia some time ago and there will be an explanation of when and how that took place._**

**_Also Olivia has news that she hasn't told Trevor yet, what do y'all think it might be?_**

**_The squad is one step closer to meeting both babies and finding out that Olivia and Trevor are married. How do you think they will react?_**.

**_What are your thoughts on this chapter? Let me know, don't forget to leave your reviews._**

**_-Karrrm. _**


	44. Chapter 44

**Meet The Babies.**

Olivia returned from the precinct and immediately heard loud cries coming from the bedroom, she made her way through the house and rushed into what they chose to be the main bedroom. She furrowed her eyebrows when she saw Trevor sitting with a crying Noah in his arms, looking flustered while Madison laid beside them crying as well.

She picked the little girl up and gently rocked her "What happened? Why are they crying?"

He let out a breath before moving Noah away from the bed just as he threw up "he has a fever and has been throwing up for the last two hours. Madison is moody because she's tired, but I was too busy cleaning up to put her down for a nap."

Olivia looked over at her son, his eyes were slightly closed and his cheeks were red and puffy from crying. She gently tapped Madison's back "okay I'm going to take his temperature and give him some syrup while you clean that up"

He nodded, gently wiping Noah's tears "he wasn't feeling well since he woke up from his nap and didn't eat or drink the milk you pumped, he's been nagging all day and then he suddenly started throwing up."

She made her way downstairs and strapped Madi into the baby swing, giving a soft smile "hey princess, momma is going to give your brother some meds real quick, so I need you to just relax for a minute okay?"

Madison stretched her arms out to her mother and cried, she was tired and moody. She had no way of fully understanding what was happening around her so she simply cried, wanting her mothers attention. Noah was also crying, his entire body shaking as his father held him, unsure of what to do.

Trevor was terrified, he had never seen his children like this and he just wanted them to be okay, he knew Noah was really sick because he didn't eat anything yet he kept throwing up. His little hands balled up the material of his father's sweater.

Olivia let out a sigh before taking the thermometer and checking Noah's temperature, she bit her lip when she saw how high it was and quickly gave him something to bring it down. She took hold of him and pressed a soft kiss to his forehead "calm down baby love, momma is here."

Trevor took hold of Madison and gently rocked her, her cries eventually subsiding to little hiccups, he let out a breath of relief when both little ones calmed down. He looked over at Noah who had his head on his mother's shoulder, his eyes closed as he shivered slightly.

"I thought I was gonna lose my mind" he whispered, watching her try to stifle a laugh.

"They can be very demanding at times, and Maddy doesn't understand why you were holding Noah but not her. I guess this is the trouble with having two babies and not having the time to set out for both of them." she gave him a soft smile "but you did good, we're both still learning the ropes."

He leaned down and pressed a chaste kiss to her lips "thank you for saving me."

"That's what I'm here for darling" she chuckled "so when these two are asleep we need to start prepping supper for the squad... And there is something I need to talk to you about."

He furrowed his eyebrows "those words make me worry, what is it?"

She ran her hand up Noah's back in a comforting way when he let out a hiccup "just something that happened a few months ago. I didn't want to bother you with it at the time but I don't want to keep things from you, so I finally had a chat with Alex and I'm ready to speak to you about it."

He sat down at the Island, shifting Madi so that she was comfortable "okay I'm listening"

She sat down beside him and let out a nervous breath, not sure where to start with this. She took a deep breath to calm her nerves before turning to look at him, seeing the confusion in his blue eyes "so a few months ago, you had gone to a meeting with Thomas about the firm. Henshall came over to see you, and ended up waiting for you at our place. He had a few glasses of wine and I was busy doing the laundry and kept him company while the kids slept in the nursery."

She paused, shifting Noah in her arms "After a few hours, he was pretty much hammered and came over to me while I was hanging up some of the clothes. He caught me off gaurd and kissed me, like really kissed me, and he may have touched my breast. I froze, and I just stood there while he shoved his tongue down my throat. I snapped out of it when he kissed my neck and Alex walked in, she saw what was happening and stopped him immediately, I pushed him off and told him to fuck off and that I am happily married and then he left. I know I should've said something sooner but I was terrified of your reaction."

He nodded, swallowing the lump in his throat "and you guys didn't do anything else?"

She shook her head "no. I swear he kissed me, touched me and I pushed him off as soon as he tried to advance further. I am so sorry for not telling you sooner"

"That son of a bitch!" he spat, standing up abruptly, he shook his head "I should have known the asshole was going to make a move on you."

Olivia frowned in confusion "how could you have known? You were out with Thomas and it was just us, Alex walked in on us and thought that it happened willingly. She slapped me before storming out, but I swear I did not want it and I stopped him."

He scowled "the entire time he was in Oregon he kept making comments about you, and I thought it was to soften me up. He would complement you and say that I am a lucky bastard to have you, I thought nothing of it at the time." he scoffed, "but Thomas did find it concerning and told me to keep an eye on him because Thomas was scared that he would try to get to you."

Olivia let out a breath "so he planned it..."

Trevor shrugged "seems like it"

"I don't think he expected me to push him away, he probably thought I would go along with it." she scoffed, "as if I would want to sleep with anybody other than you."

He caressed her cheek "I am not angry at you, I am pissed at Henshall though because he came onto you knowing that you are my wife." he scowled "and the fact that he tried again after you pushed him off..."

"hey, calm down." she placed her hand over his "he didn't win, I'm still yours, always will be. He may have tried again but he did not score in any way and he never will." she squeezed his hand.

He shook his head "I need to go for a drive, to clear my mind. Will you be okay with them?"

She nodded, knowing that he needed his space to help him process this news, she just hoped that he would be home in time for dinner and that they could speak calmly through this. She gave him a small, supportive smile before leaning up and pressing a soft kiss to his lips "Just help me lay them down and I will be okay from there."

He nodded "okay, do you want them in their cribs or in the swings?"

She pursed her lips, thinking it through, if they were in their cribs, she would have the freedom to be as loud as possible in the kitchen, but she would not be able to keep an eye them. However if they were in the swings in the kitchen, she would be able to keep an eye on them, yet a drop of a pan would instantly awaken both babies and then she would have to sit with them instead of cooking.

"In their cribs would be best" she finally answered, smirking when he took the lead.

He laid Madison down and gently kissed her forehead after covering her with the blankets, he made sure she was comfortable and secure before moving to Noah. He kissed the little boys forehead as well, ensuring that he too was comfortable. He then turned on the baby monitor, being sure to take one of the speakers downstairs to the kitchen where Liv would be cooking.

He was still furious and she could see it, he was absolutely seething and he knew that he had to calm down. He reached for Olivia and pulled her into his arms, he leaned down and gave her a deep kiss. Their lips met in a fervent kiss, his hands fisted up the material of her shirt and she moaned softly as his lips crashed against her own.

She knew he was trying to get some of his anger out and she did not blame him, plus she was enjoying their heated make out session. She pulled away when air was necessary and smiled up at him "did that help?"

He gave her a weak smile "I just, I needed to feel you... I'm scared Liv"

"Of what?" she cupped his cheek, seeing the tears that filled his eyes.

He sat down, running one of his hands through his hair "I'm scared of myself, I know if I leave the house now, I'm going to the firm and I'm going to beat the shit out of him. I can usually control my temper but I know seeing him is going to make me lose it and I know nothing will be able to stop me once I start." he shook his head "I don't trust myself right now"

She moved over and straddled him, taking hold of his arms and wrapping it around her waist "hey look at me" he looked up, "if you feel that way, then I am not letting you leave this house. You're going to stay right here with me and we are going to talk this through while I start cooking."

He nodded, pulling her close to his body "I love you Olivia and I don't want to lose you"

"Baby I am not going anywhere, you haven't lost a thing, I'm still here. I will always be here for you, because I love you more than words can say." she caressed his cheek gently, giving him a chaste peck "let's go lay down for a bit... Just to talk things through."

"Okay" he pressed a deeper kiss to her lips "let's do that."

...

"Hey, you're looking good. Are you ready for tonight?" Alex asked as she helped Olivia around the kitchen while Trevor kept the babies occupied.

Olivia smiled softly "I am ready, I know it's going to be a great evening and I'm ready for the squad to meet my family."

Alex nodded, carrying one of the platters to the table "Hey Trev, you good?"

He looked up from where he was sitting on the ground "yes I am, Liv and I spoke about it and I decided that it will be best if I avoid Henshall for a while. Just to prevent myself from snapping."

Madison looked up at her visibly disturbed father and walked toward him, handing him one of her plushies "dadda"

He took hold of her and pressed a kiss to her forehead "yes princess?"

"Is you sad?" she asked softly.

Trevor smiled down at his daughter, pulling her in for a hug "I'll be a lot better if you gave daddy a hug"

She wrapped her little arms around her fathers neck and let out a giggle "better now?" she asked.

He nodded "I am much better, thank you princess."

Alex just carried the last dish to the table when they heard a knock at the door. Olivia walked out of the kitchen and made her way to the door "I'll get it" she hollered.

She opened the door and smirked when she saw the entire gang outside "did you all plan to get here at the same time?"

Cragen shrugged "you told us 7 pm so here we are, right on time."

"It's good to see all of you, come in and make yourselves at home" she stepped aside, allowing them to file into her home "mi casa es su casa"

Elliot smirked before pulling her in for a hug "don't think we forgot that you have been avoiding us these last few days. It's time to explain"

She gave him a small smile before turning to the group who were looking at her, she pursed her lips "follow me and you will know what has been keeping me so busy that I couldn't pop in sooner."

She led them into the dining room where Trevor, Alex and the babies were. Madison was cuddled up in her fathers arms while Noah made his way toward his mother on unsteady legs. Olivia leaned down and caught him just in time when she saw that he was about to tople over. She scooped him up and let out a laugh when squealed happily "hey baby boy, did you miss me?"

He nodded "me miss mamma" he giggled before kissing her cheek.

Olivia heard the collective gasps coming from the squad and turned to them with a massive smile on her face "guys meet my family, this is Noah Dean Langan, and that little daddies girl is Madison Tiffany Langan."

* * *

**_Reviews are life. _**


	45. Chapter 45

**Breathe.**

Cragen felt his eyes tearing up as he looked at the woman he considered to be his daughter, carrying her own little boy. He took hold of her hand "I am so proud of you Olivia, they are so cute."

Noah looked down at Cragen's hand that held his mother's and reached for it, letting out a giggle as he pushed their hands apart "my mamma"

Olivia chuckled and shook her head "Noah baby it's fine, this is my dad."

He looked up at her with furrowed eyebrows "him you dadda?"

Trevor nodded "yes son, that is your granddad, can you say granddad?"

Madison perked up and looked over at the other people in the room, giving them a shy smile before cuddling back into her fathers arms "hello" she whispered.

Munch smirked at the little girl "she is the shy one and this little guy is a chatter box."

Trevor nodded "yes, Madi doesn't talk much to other people, she is very quiet. Noah on the other hand is more adventurous and loud, he is calm but he likes to speak."

Elliot took hold of the little boy and let out a laugh when Noah pulled a face at him "why didn't you tell us that you were pregnant?"

She shrugged, leading the group to the table "I had no idea how you would all react, plus you were the only person who knew about my marriage."

"Wait you two are married? I thought he just got you knocked up and now you're dating... When the hell did you get married?" Fin pipped up.

Trevor sat down beside Olivia and handed Madison to her "we got married a little over a year ago... Olivia fell pregnant a month after our wedding, but we didn't know until after she hit the three month mark. Then we decided not to tell anybody until she was completely in the clear."

Alex playfully scowled at Olivia "I found out on Christmas night because Liv was rushed to hospital before I arrived. Trevor's brother Thomas took me straight to the hospital and I saw these two for the very first time on the little ultrasound machine."

"Why were you rushed to hospital?" Amanda asked after introducing herself to Trevor and Alex.

Olivia fed Madi a little bit of food and gave Amanda a small smile "I nearly had a went into early labour due to stress... So christmas morning everything was fine, I was just really tired and then after a few hours I started cramping, we were terrified..."

Trevor took hold of Noah as Elliot handed him over when he began fusing, he kissed his little boy's forehead and smiled softly "we almost lost these two and now seeing them here, healthy and growing, I just know that it was meant to be."

Olivia nodded "I don't know how I would have survived losing them, after five whole months of carrying them without any complications."

Cragen gave her a concerned look "were you expecting any complications?"

"I guess we were... When we found out, we didn't tell anybody because we were terrified that I was going to lose them." she whispered, pressing a gentle kiss to Madison's hair.

Munch furrowed his brow "why would you guys think like that?"

She bit her lip, turning to look at Trevor. Her eyes had instantly welled up and she knew she would not be able to tell them the truth without crying. Trevor took hold of her hand and kissed the back of it before explaining to them what happened with her first pregnancy.

Collective gasps were heard around the table as they listened to him recounting the most painful moment they had experienced. Olivia wiped the few tears that escaped her eyes and gave Trevor a weak smile, letting him know that even though she was hurt by the memory, she was still okay. She healed and so did he, they would never forget what happened during their first pregnancy but they would not let it define them either.

Olivia knew that she was destined to be a mother, because if she wasn't, she would not have had the twins. Although she would have loved to hold her very first baby, she knew it just wasn't meant to be. That it happened too early, the timing was not right for them. She looked down at her little girl and her little boy and smiled, the timing was right with those two.

Elliot reached over and took hold of Madi, smiling brightly at her "hey there beautiful, you look just like your mother."

Madi looked up at him with wide eyes "mamma" she pipped up.

He chuckled "how do you do that? You make any random word sound so absolutely cute."

Kathy smiled down at the girl in her husband's arms "tell him you make everything sound cute because you are cute."

Olivia smirked as she watched her little girl look around the room "she is searching for Trevor... She's such a daddies girl already"

Madison looked over at her mother and blew a raspberry at her mother before letting out a giggle. Olivia reached over and tickled her gently, smiling when she threw her head back and laughed loudly.

Amanda smirked before reaching for Noah "may I?"

"of course" she handed the little boy over to her.

Noah looked up at the detective with wide eyes and she could not help but laugh at his expression "hey there little guy."

Noah let out a soft yawn before cuddling into her embrace, Amanda let out a soft sigh "I think I'm ready to be a mother now."

Trevor let out a laugh "they have that affect on a lot of people, but I love that about them."

Elliot handed Madison back to her father after a long time "this one is getting a bit fussy and has been asking for her dad for a while now."

He took hold of his daughter and pressed a kiss to her cheek "what's wrong Princess?"

She looked up at her dad with tear filled eyes and pouted "Dadda"

He stood up and carried her into the kitchen, taking the bottle with milk his wife had pumped before the squad came and handing it to Madi. She took the bottle and immediately began drinking the milk, her eyes closing as she rested her head against her fathers shoulder.

Fin sat beside Amanda and noticed that Noah was not looking too good, his eyes were extremely droopy. He reached over and placed his hand against Noah's forehead, pulling it away after a minute "Liv this little guy is burning up."

She looked over and noticed that Noah was once again looking sick "I'll get his medication."

Cragen furrowed his brow, turning to Trevor "how long has he been sick?"

"This morning he was moody and he was throwing up a few hours before you guys came. He looked much better after his nap though" Trevor explained.

Olivia took hold of her son and listened as he let out heavy coughs "what's wrong baby boy?" she asked softly.

Noah's smile had dicipated and now all that remained on his little face was a tired expression. He laid his head on his mother's shoulder, coughing heavily every now and again.

She gently rubbed his back while sitting down with him "He's breathing heavy, I think we need to get him to a doctor."

Kathy gave Olivia a supportive smile "Olivia it's probably just a cold. Babies get that all the time and after a good night's rest they usually feel better. Give him the night and he hasn't cleared up by morning then take him in."

...

The squad had gone home after a few hours and Alex stayed to help clean up while Olivia relaxed with the babies. Madison was crawling about and playing with the toys that were strewn across the carpets. Noah on the other hand had not said a word or moved from his mother's arms since dinner.

He curled up in his mother's embrace and let out heavy coughs, his little eyes pressed closed. His cheeks were a bright shade of red and his hands were balled up into fists.

Trevor sat down beside his wife and frowned at the sight of his son "has his fever let up?"

"No, he is still burning up and I'm getting worried" she said while rubbing his back.

Noah looked up at his mother and let out yet another heavy cough "mamma" he whispered, his eyes filling with little tears while shivering.

She stood to her feet and gently rocked her son, her mind was plaguing her to take him to hospital but she didn't want to make a scene. He was okay, he was still breathing, albeit with great struggle.

Trevor pressed a soft kiss to the side of her head "I think they should sleep with us tonight."

"definitely" she nodded "I need to keep an eye on him"

She motioned for Madison to come over to them and gave her a sweet smile "we need to get to bed princess"

Madison looked up at her mother and let out a yawn "up up" she said while stretching her arms out toward her parents.

Olivia handed Noah to Trevor before picking their youngest child up and pressing a kiss to her forehead "come on, let's get you two to bed."

Madison played with her mother's necklace as they walked to the main bedroom. Trevor gently laid Noah down on the bed and changed his diaper before allowing him to crawl under the covers. Olivia did the same with Madison and smiled down at both little ones "mommy is going get changed okay?"

"Otay" Madison pipped up, while Noah simply let out yet another cough.

Trevor sat down beside his son and ran his fingers through his hair "how are you feeling champ?"

Noah looked up at his father with tired eyes, not bothering to speak, he simply shrugged before going into a little coughing fit.

Trevor sat him up and rubbed his back while he let out heavy coughs, tears rolling down his cheeks. He gently rocked his son to get him to calm down but Noah refused, letting out loud cries between every few coughs.

Olivia came out and sighed, she could see that he was suffering and she hated that she couldn't take his pain away. She looked over at Trevor who looked just as disturbed "I hate seeing him like this" she whispered.

He looked over at her, seeing the tears that shone in her eyes "Liv baby, he's going to be okay"

She sniffled softly "yeah, you're right, but that doesn't make it any easier. He's suffering"

"I know, and I wish I could make it all better but we can't. Olivia they're kids, they are going to get sick, it's part of life." he walked over to his wife and pressed a kiss to her forehead "Noah is going to be fine, we just need to keep our eyes on him tonight"

She nodded, giving him a weak smile "okay, sorry for getting worked up"

He pressed a kiss to her lips "there's no need to apologise."

She wrapped her arms around his waist "I love you"

"I love you too beautiful" he gave her another kiss, holding this one a bit longer before giving her a breathtaking smile "now go lay down with our daughter while I get our son to calm down."

She slipped into bed and undid the buttons on her shirt, before allowing Madi to latch onto her breasts. Madison's eyes were pressed closed while her hand played with her mother's necklace once again.

Trevor paced the room with Noah in his arms, listening as his cries eventually turned into hiccups. Once he had calmed down completely, his father got into the bed before handing him over to his mother for a feed. Madison was sound asleep and Trevor gently moved her so that Noah could lay beside his wife.

Olivia watched as Noah suckled at her nipple, his eyes closed while he tried to breathe through his little nose. After a short while he turned away from his mother's breast and let out a yawn. She pressed a kiss to his forehead "you're not hungry huh?"

He coughed "no mama" he said before cuddling into her arms and easing down.

"Liv are you okay?" Trevor asked, seeing the disturbed look on his wife's face.

"I'm worried sick. Noah never says no to drinking, I don't know what is going on but I can see that he is in pain right now. It makes me angry that I can't help him" she said with tears rolling down her cheeks.

Trevor reached over and took her hand, kissing the back of it "I know you're worried, I am too but right now all we can do is give him the night and I promise if he doesn't look any better we take him to hospital immediately."

"Okay" she nodded, giving his hand a squeeze.

Trevor watched as Olivia settled down under the covers, allowing Noah to cuddle into her arms. He stayed awake as his wife and kids slept, all three of them with the same facial expressions. He was blown away by how much both babies looked like his wife.

...

Olivia stirred when she felt someone nudging her, she forced her eyes open, seeing her husband looking at her in a panicked state. She frowned before letting out a yawn "what's wrong?"

He swallowed hard, moving to get out of their bed "we need to get Noah to hospital, he isn't breathing properly and his lips are turning blue."

She sat up with a start, immediately moving out of the bed and over to the drawers that stood against the wall. She slipped into a sweatpants and a pair of sneakers before throwing on a plain t-shirt and a hoodie. She rushed to the bed and checked on Madison before picking Noah up and pressing a kiss to his forehead.

The little boy simply curled into his mother's arms while struggling for air, his eyes pressed closed, and his cheeks no longer their usual rosey shade. He was pale, and he let out heavy coughs every now and then.

Trevor got dressed and packed an overnight bag for the babies, ensuring that they had everything they would need before dressing a grumpy Madison into one of her thick crawlers. He picked his little girl up before leading his distraught wife out of the house and into the car that was parked outside in their driveway.

Olivia held Noah close, smoothing down the blanket that was wrapped around him as the wind blew at it. She knew they had to hurry to get him to hospital because he was looking worse with each passing second. Her biggest fear was staring right at her face when she realised that there was a possibility that they could lose their son.

* * *

**_Reviews is life. _**


	46. Chapter 46

**News.**

"What are the doctors saying? What's wrong with him?" Mary asked as she paced in the waiting room.

Trevor had called his mother and brother when Noah got admitted, knowing that he and Olivia would need all the support they could get. Alex was also informed and immediately rushed over to the hospital, wanting to be there for her bestfriend and the babies.

Trevor sighed "Noah has pneumonia, Liv is in the room with him but he isn't looking too good. You guys can come through" he said weakly.

Mary took hold of her son's hand and gave it a squeeze "How's Liv holding up?"

He stopped and shook his head "she's not taking this well. She just sits there, refusing to eat or drink anything. I'm worried that she's going to get sick if she doesn't eat something but she won't hear it. All she wants is to hold Madi and sit beside Noah, watching him and making sure that he is still breathing."

A sigh left his lips "I'm worried about her, she is the love of my life and seeing her like this is killing me." he closed his eyes "the last time I saw her like this was after her first pregnancy. She has that blank stare on her face that she had when we lost our first baby and I don't know how to help her."

Mary reached up and wiped the tears that escaped his eyes "hey, she is a mother that is worried sick about her son. I know this is hard on her because in her mind he might not pull through. She's probably in there thinking about every situation that could go wrong and all you can do is be there for her. Make her realise that Noah is going to pull through and get her to take care of herself."

He nodded, straightening up and steadying himself "okay, I think I can do that."

He led them into the room and immediately moved over to Olivia who sat in the seat beside the bed that their son was in. He had gone for multiple tests since they got there in the middle of the night. They managed to determine the strain of pneumonia and found that it was bacterial pneumonia.

Noah laid in the hospital bed sleeping, he had a little oxygen mask resting over his mouth and nose. He also had an iv drip in his arm, which was giving him the antibiotics that was necessary to get rid of the bacteria. They had done a number of tests and Noah was surprisingly well behaved, he didn't cry much but he was not his usual bubbly self.

Madison was asleep in her mother's arms, her hair was tied back into two ponytails while her hands fisted up the material of her mother's jacket.

Olivia heard the door to the room open and gave her husband a weak smile "any news?"

He shook his head "nothing yet, they're still waiting to see if the antibiotics is working." he leaned down to press a kiss to her lips "you hungry?"

"No." she pursed her lips, before turning to Alex, Mary and Thomas "hey guys."

Alex walked over to her friend and pulled her in for a hug "I was worried sick when Trev called."

"I just feel so shit, knowing that we can't do anything but sit here and wait to hear if he's reacting to the medicines." she said with a sigh.

Trevor took hold of Madison "it's really hard but we need to stay strong for him."

She looked up at him and forced a smile "i know and I am trying. I just can't stomach anything right now, this stress is making me queasy."

...

"It's been a day and you still haven't eaten a thing. Liv you're going to get sick if you don't eat and then you won't be able to be here for Noah." Trevor said with a sigh as he watched his wife pace the room with an exhausted look on her face.

His mother took Madison out for the day, giving the couple a break from the toddlers mood swings and also giving her some much needed space. Noah was still extremely weak and out of it, but there was some slight improvement in his condition.

Olivia stopped pacing and sighed when she saw the worried look that was etched onto her husband's face. She knew he was stressed but she just couldn't get herself to eat or drink anything right now.

She walked over to him and took his hands into hers "I'm okay, I'll let you know when I'm hungry, right now all I want is for our little boy to get better so that we can go back home and spend time with both of our kids"

He pulled her into his arms and let out a sigh "I know this is hard, but please just eat something. I'm begging you Liv"

She rolled her eyes "fine, I'll eat a sandwich or something but you have to go and get it because I'm not leaving him."

"Okay" he smiled softly, pressing a kiss to her lips "I'll be right back."

She watched him rush out of the room before moving to sit beside her sons bed. She took his hand and pressed a kiss to it "you have to get better baby boy, momma is worried sick about you. I hate seeing you like this, knowing that you're suffering..."

Noah's eyes fluttered open and immediately settled on his mother who was looking down at him. A small smile tugged at his lips and he immediately stretched his arms out to be picked up by her.

He pulled up his face "up up" he said softly.

She picked him up, being careful not to touch the IV that was still in his arm, before pressing a soft kiss to his forehead "are you feeling a bit better baby boy?"

He shrugged, cuddling further into his mother's embrace "me sick?"

She let out a soft laugh "yes you are. You scared mommy and daddy."

"where dadda?" he asked.

Olivia gently rubbed his back "he went to get momma something to eat..."

...

A week went by and the couple were still clad in the hospital, Noah was showing improvement but not enough to be sent home.

Olivia on the other hand was getting more and more sick, she had lost her appetite and was extremely queasy. She spent most of her time sitting with Noah and Madi or in the hospital's bathroom. They pinned it down to her stressing about Noah, figuring that her stress was making her sick.

At the moment she was seated on Noah's bed, breastfeeding Madison while Noah slept beside her. She had been given orders to try and breastfeed Noah and he definitely enjoyed it. It took about twenty minutes before he was knocked out and sleeping peacefully.

Trevor pressed a kiss to the side of his wife's head "how are you feeling?"

She looked up and forced a smile "tired, weak."

"You have to get some actual rest babe" he said, taking hold of her hand "you look drained and if you don't get some proper rest you are going to crash."

She sighed "Trevor we've been over this time and time again, and I've already told you that I am not going anywhere until they release our son."

"Liv I'm worried about y-"

"I know you're worried! I know because you keep shoving that down my throat and it's making me feel like a horrible person. I'm sorry that I'm worrying you like this but I just can't go home until I know that our son is one hundred percent in the clear." she cut him off, her eyes filled with tears.

He pulled her into his arms and allowed her to let out tired sobs "he is going to be okay Liv, I know you're stressed about him. I promise you that our boy is going to be perfectly fine soon, he's already improving."

He kissed the top of her head "I know you're exhausted and I'm sorry for putting you under pressure. I just am really worried about you, you're looking weaker with each passing day"

She laid Madison down beside Noah and watched her daughter cuddle up with her son, a small smile pulling at her lips "I'm sorry for stressing you out like this babe, I promise once Noah is back home I will get some proper rest."

He wrapped his arms around her waist "okay. I love you"

"I love you too" she whispered before leaning up to press a kiss to his lips.

He broke their kiss and gave her a concerned look "what's wrong?"

She closed her eyes "I've had a headache all day but it's getting worse. I think I just need to get something to drink"

Trevor watched her walk toward the table beside the door of the room where her bag stood. He noticed that she was walking funny and it looked like she was dragging her feet behind her. He reached for her just in time, stopping her from hitting the floor as she passed out. He immediately picked her up before calling for a doctor.

...

Olivia let out a groan as her eyes fluttered open, she felt as if she had been hit by a bus. Her throat was dry and her head was throbbing, her sight was groggy and she squinted slightly. After a few minutes she noticed that she was in a hospital bed with Trevor sitting beside her.

Trevor took hold of her hand and stood up to press a kiss to the side of her head "hey beautiful, how are you feeling?"

She shrugged "what happened?"

He sat down and gave her a small smile "you passed out. You were dehydrated and you're low on iron"

"Where's Noah and Madi?" she asked while taking a sip of the water he handed her.

"They are in the room next door, my mom is with them." he placed the glass of water down on the counter "I'm going to call a doctor."

She sat back with a sigh before looking down at the IV drip that was connected to her arm. She had no idea how she could end up like this, she wished she had listened to Trevor when he told her to take a break.

"Mrs Langan, it's good to see you sitting up. You had us worried" a young doctor said as he followed Trevor into the room. "I'm doctor Leighton, I've taken over your son's file and by the looks of it, yours too."

"I'm fine" she forced a smile "I just crashed because I didn't eat and I haven't slept in a while, but I'm feeling much better already."

He smirked "well that is good to hear, but you're not getting out of it that easily. You need rest and I know that you won't be able to do that unless we keep you here and monitor you. So what we are going to do is bring your son into this room so that he can be with his mother and then we're going to monitor you and him for the next two to three days"

She scoffed "that's unnecessary. I promise to eat and rest properly, I learnt my lesson. I can't stay in this bed while Noah is sick, he needs me and so does Madison."

Doctor Leighton sighed "Olivia I know you hate that you're stuck in this bed, but it's gonna stay that way. You passed out and have been knocked out for a good three hours." he gave her a tight lipped smile "you were extremely dehydrated, that paired with your lack of iron is a mixture for disaster."

He handed her two pills and a glass of water "these should help with the low iron and battle the anaemia symptoms."

She took the tablets before looking back at him with a frown "so when can I see my kids?"

"Noah just went for an x-ray, I'll get your mother in law to bring the little girl to you and I'll bring Noah once he is done." he said with a smile.

Trevor frowned "wait so who is with him for the x-ray?"

"Thomas Langan" he said before taking the empty glass back from Olivia "right so I'll be back when Noah finishes up, and then I'll set him up beside you. I'm sure he would be way more comfortable being with his mother as well."

She nodded "thank you doctor Leighton."

"there's no need to thank me, but you have to get as much rest as possible. You and the little one needs it." he said with a smirk.

She let out a soft laugh "trust me when I say that Noah and Madi have no issues when it comes to getting rest."

He furrowed his eyebrows "I wasn't referring to them. I was referring to your baby."

"What baby? The only babies I have are the twins..." she said, a confused look on her face.

Trevor shot the doctor a confused glance "you must have her mistaken with one of your other patients. Our only kids are the twins."

He shook his head "oh... I thought you knew."

"Knew what?" she asked nervously.

"That you're pregnant." he said with a wide smile "that's why you're lacking iron. You are almost three months along according to our calculations."

Olivia's jaw dropped and her eyes instantly welled up with tears "I'm... That can't be right, I can't be."

"I'll bring an ultrasound machine along with me when I return and you'll both be able to see your third little one." he said before moving over to the door "congratulations by the way."

Trevor turned to her, a stunned expression on his face "you're... We're going to have another baby."

She shook her head, placing a hand on her still flat stomach "they must have made a mistake... I can't be, I would have known."

He watched her break down in tears before pulling her into his arms "shh baby, it's okay, this is good news. We're going to have another baby, this is great."

"No it's not" she sobbed out.

* * *

**_Reviews are always appreciated. Sorry for the wait. Let me know what y'all think._**

**_A special thanks to BenoightLangson, DaisyNoura, Lisepigen83 and HeartStory for constantly being supportive of this book._**

**_I appreciate every one of your reviews and I am so thankful to have readers who give me feedback for every/most of the chapters I have written._**

**_Your reviews are often what keeps me going and I appreciate all of you and the rest of my readers. I don't usually do shout outs but a little appreciation post is always welcomed. Thank you all for reading._**

**_This book still has a long way to go and there is a lot that still has to happen, be prepared._**

**_To the rest of my readers thank you so much for the continued support, I hope you all are enjoying this so far._**

**_love y'all_**

**_-Chels. _**


	47. Chapter 47

**Baby Blues.**

"how did she take it?" Alex asked as she sat beside Olivia's hospital bed.

Olivia was asleep while Trevor paced the room with Noah in his arms, the toddler was tired but he wanted to get out of bed for a bit. He had improved massively and his parents were both stunned at how quickly he was healing. He could breathe on his own without his little oxygen mask, and he was starting to feed better.

Madison was out with Kathy and her kids for the day, because they didn't want her to be clad in the hospital all day. She was doing wonderful and was excited to spend the day with the kid that was close to her age since her brother was too sick to play.

"She did not take it well, she cried herself to sleep and has not mentioned the baby once since we received the news." Trevor said with a tired sigh.

"Does she not want more kids?" she asked.

He shrugged "well as far as I know, she was always open to the idea of having more kids. We planned it for much later but that doesn't mean we don't want this baby."

"Speak for yourself" came the whisper from the hospital bed.

He turned to her and frowned "what are you saying?"

"I wasn't ready for this Trevor. We've been so overwhelmed by all of these changes and I just started working again, and now I'm pregnant. This is literally the worst time for this to be happening." she said while moving to sit up.

Noah lifted his head at the sound of her voice and stretched his arms out to her "momma"

She took hold of her son and pressed a kiss to his forehead "hey baby boy, how are you feeling?"

Noah shrugged, cuddling into her embrace "I go home?"

She let out a breath "not right now, we still have a day or two to spend here."

"Are you excited to be a big brother?" Alex asked Noah with a smile.

Olivia scoffed "he's always been a big brother, Madison is younger than him."

Trevor sighed "so you're just going to pretend to not be pregnant?"

"I wish I could but I don't have that privilege since I'm almost three months along already. I'll start showing soon" she said with a sigh.

He sat down on the edge of her bed "why don't you want this baby Liv? That baby is a part of both of us."

She sat back and began breastfeeding Noah "I'm not ready for another baby Trevor. I hardly know how to handle the two that we have. Noah got sick because I didn't realise something was wrong with him soon enough. I already feel like a horrible mother to the two babies we have, so why would I want to subject another baby to that."

He moved over and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into his embrace "you are not a bad mother Olivia. Neither you nor I could have known that Noah was going to get sick and it's not our fault. He's a kid, kids get sick all the time. It's part of life and our babies are no exception, even if we want them to be."

He wiped the tears that fell from her eyes and pressed a kiss to her lips "I love you and all of our kids, all three of them. I know this is going to bring a lot of challenges our way but we will get through it together."

She sobbed softly while holding onto her son "I feel like a mess. How can I not know that I am pregnant, there was no signs, I didn't have morning sickness or anything. So how is this possible?"

"Babe it makes sense, you have been very emotional lately and you haven't gotten your period in a while. I guess we weren't paying enough attention to notice."

Alex smirked "you two are going to be amazing with that baby, just like you already are with these two. Noah and Madison are the happiest babies that I have ever met, they know that they are loved and it shows. You're an incredible mother and you're going to be even better with this one because you have more experience now."

She placed her hand onto her still flat stomach and sniffled "I know that you are both right but it's going to take time to get used to it."

"We can handle that" Trevor said with a smile, pressing another kiss to her lips. He held this one for a bit longer, only breaking it when air was necessary "I love you"

"I love you too honey" she said, with her first real smile since they arrived at the hospital.

The door opened and Kathy walked in before smirking at Madi who was trailing behind her "come on missy, I'm sure your mother wants to see you."

Madison waddled into the hospital room wearing a poofy pink princess dress and a tiara. She smirked at her parents and had a little handbag in her hands, before squealing happily.

"Mamma!!" she screamed before bolting toward the bed.

Trevor hopped up and grabbed hold of her just before she could topple over, he threw her up and smirked when she let out an excited squeal "hey daddies princess" he pressed a kiss to her cheek when he caught her.

Madison giggled before giving her father a hug "I miss you"

He smirked "I missed you too princess, you look beautiful, show momma your dress"

Olivia's smile widened and her face lit up at the sight of her daughter dressed in a poofy princess gown "hey baby girl, you look absolutely stunning. You're a real princess now"

She nodded "see my nails" she said before flashing her sparkly pink nail polish at her mother.

"Wow, it's so pretty and pink." she smiled before handing Noah over to Kathy "come here and give momma a hug, I missed you today."

Trevor placed his daughter in her arms and stood back with a proud smile as he watched his girls talk about what Madison got up to. The twins were two weeks away from their first birthday and they were starting to look bigger with each passing day. They were both so smart and often left their parents speechless by how much they had grown already.

"you look beautiful princess, mommy is so proud of you. I cannot wait to go home and cuddle up with you and Noah, and have a good nap, and then play with all the toys we can lay our hands on." Olivia said with a massive smile.

Noah turned to his mother and gave her a massive smile "and eat ice-cream"

Trevor chuckled at his son's words "someone is clearly getting better"

Olivia nodded with a laugh "of course he is, you know he's healthy when he starts thinking about food."

...

Olivia sat back and let out a sigh as she looked at the two women who sat in the hospital room with her. Noah had gone for yet another test and Trevor decided to take Madison along with them in the hopes that having her there would make Noah more comfortable. The twins were always happier together, they loved being around each other. They were the best of friends, both equally wild and jolly, and smart mouthed. They were inseparable and their parents loved that about them.

Kathy looked over at Olivia, her eyebrows knitted together in confusion "so you're pregnant again, then why are you so sad about it?"

Olivia sat back and sighed "It just feels wrong, Noah and Madison are still so young. They still need me to breastfeed them and hold them and nurture them. Now I might not be able to give them that undivided attention because I'm pregnant, I now need to take precautions for this baby. I just feel like I've taken away some of their time of being babies because I couldn't stay in my pants."

Alex chuckled, taking hold of Olivia's hand "Honey this baby is such a blessing, I know it's a lot to take in but soon you'll be jumping with excitement to meet this little one."

She shook her head "I don't want it. I hate myself for feeling this way but I don't want this baby Alex. It kills me because Trevor is so excited, he cannot wait for things to progress and me to start showing. I don't want any of those things, I just wanna go back home with my two children and continue life like this never happened."

Kathy gently wiped the tears that fell from Olivia's eyes, she pulled her in for a hug and rubbed her back in a comforting way as she cried "Liv you are going to have to tell Trevor about this, so that you two can discuss what you're gonna do in going forward. He wants the baby and you don't, that's a shitty situation but you cannot keep it from him. He's a good man and I'm sure he will understand your reasoning if you just speak to him."

She let out a sob "no he won't, he'll leave me and threaten to take the kids away from me. I love him too much to lose him but I really don't want this baby."

...

Two days had gone by and the family was cleared to go home, which brought a ton of excitement to the twins and Trevor. Olivia on the other hand was dreading it because she knew her husband would bring up her pregnancy eventually. She still felt like a mess, her mind was filled with a ton of thoughts on what would happen if she told Trevor that she did not want this baby. She didn't want him finding out the real reason behind her aprehension, she just wanted to forget what happened and move on. She promised herself that she would not speak of it, nor would she bring it up, but now she was pregnant and it was bringing up all kinds of emotions in her.

Trevor noticed that his wife had grown distant from him in the last two days, she only spoke when he brought up the twins. She wasn't herself and he knew it had something to do with her being pregnant, he was terrified that she would do something stupid. He loved her with his whole heart but he knew he would never be able to forgive her if she aborted their baby.

The twins were asleep in their car seats, both of them making the softest cooing noises as they slept.

He stole a quick glance at them before sighing "Livia are you okay? You've been quiet all day and I can see that something is bothering you."

She pursed her lips "I'm fine babe."

He heard those words multiple times over the last two days, he knew that was her way of avoiding a conversation about what was bothering her. He took her hand and pressed a gentle kiss to it "okay baby. I love you."

"I know" she forced a smile, before clearing her throat "I love you too." she said, bringing their conversation to an abrupt close.

He sighed before turning all his attention back to the road and driving them home in silence. He knew she was not going to tell him what she was going through until she felt ready. He also knew better than anyone else that she needed time to process all of this, she needed time to accept it. He was willing to give her a few days, but he knew soon enough he would not be able to keep quiet about his fears.

It was terrifying situation to be in, him wanting the baby while his wife wanted nothing to do with it. They were at a crossroad, one that could tear them apart indefinitely. Trevor hoped and prayed that his wife was feeling a bit of baby blues and that it would pass over soon. If not he had no idea where this would leave them, but he knew one thing for sure. He would never forgive her if she hurt their baby, he still had a hole in his heart because of the loss of their first baby.

He would never survive losing another one of his kids, especially if his own wife was the reason for losing their baby. He loved that child already and he feared what she might do because she was so obviously depressed.

* * *

**_How are we feeling?_**

**_Hopefully you all don't hate me..._**

**_Reviews are always appreciated. _**


	48. Chapter 48

**Sleeping Beauty.**

Trevor sat down on his side of the bed after laying the twins down, he watched silently as she came out from the shower and moved over to the bed.

Olivia got under the covers and made herself as comfortable as possible before looking over at Trevor who was just sitting and staring at her "I feel there's something you want to say to me."

"There is, but I'm not sure that now is the right time for it." he admitted.

She sighed "it's about the baby isn't it?"

"I just don't understand why you don't want our baby. It doesn't make any sense to me, especially after what we went through when you first fell pregnant."

She sat up and shook her head "I know it doesn't make sense to you because you're not the one who has to carry and birth this baby. I'm terrified of what could happen, and that is why I would prefer not be pregnant."

He sighed "are you going to end the pregnancy?"

"I don't know... I have thought about it but I don't want to do that without your approval, I need to know that whatever decision I make, that you will still be with me." she said nervously.

Trevor turned to face her and shook his head, just the thought of her aborting their baby was making him feel sick to his stomach "I love you... But I don't know if I would be able to ever forgive you if you did something to hurt our baby."

"So what do you want me to do? Because I don't want this baby in any way." she said with a scowl.

"Fine if that's the case, all I ask is that you carry it to term. Once the kid is born, if you still feel that you don't want it, I will raise it on my own." he said with a pained looked on his face.

She scoffed "yeah then you go to work and I'm stuck with a child I didn't want in the first place."

He shook his head "no you won't be, because if you decide that you don't want our baby, then I don't know if I can continue to be with you."

"So you're going to leave me if I don't want this baby?" she asked with tears filling her eyes.

Trevor nodded, his own eyes shining with unshed tears "I might. I don't know what the future holds but if it comes to that point and you decide that you don't want our child then I will have to take it and raise it on my own."

"What about Noah and Madi?"

He shrugged "well since you somehow wanted them, I guess we would have to agree on joint custody of some sort."

She let out a sob "I can't do this. I need time." she moved out of the bed and grabbed a hoodie and a pair of sweatpants "I'm going for a drive to clear my mind."

He sighed before reaching for her hand "I still love you."

She shrugged him off "I love you too, but I still don't want this baby. Just give me time to think this all through."

"okay but where are you going?" he asked softly.

"I'm going to Alex's place, I pumped milk for the twins." she said before pressing a chaste kiss to his lips "I promise I won't be gone too long, give me two hours."

He nodded "okay babe, drive safe please"

She nodded "yeah, I'll see y'all later" she said before going to check on the twins.

She pressed soft kisses to both of their heads before going out and getting into the car, she fastened her seat belt and made her way out of the driveway before disappearing down the street.

Trevor took out his phone and dialed Alex's number "hey Al"

She answered immediately "hey Trev, how's Liv and the kids?"

"The twins are okay, but Liv isn't. We may have had a few words about what could happen with her not wanting the baby. She's on her way to you, please text me when she gets there because I'm worried about her." he said with a sigh.

Alex nodded "sure, are the twins with her?"

"No they're asleep so she left them with me. I just have an uneasy feeling about this whole situation so please let me know when she gets there."

"Will do. I know you're stressed, but I'll talk to her and I will let you know when she arrives."

"Thanks Alex"

"There's no need to thank me Trev, you know I'll always look out for you and Liv." she said before hanging up.

Trevor sat back down and let out a sigh, he turned on the news before laying back. He was exhausted, with everything that has been going on he didn't get much sleep so he knew a nap would do him some good. He settled on his side of the bed and let out a yawn before getting comfortable and falling into a fitful sleep.

...

He woke up two hours later to the sound of crying coming from the baby monitor, he got out of bed and rushed to the nursary where the twins were crying.

He gently picked both little ones up and carried them downstairs, placing them both in their swings.

Noah pouted "where momma?"

He sighed before handing each of them a bottle of the milk his wife pumped "mommy went to visit Aunty Alex, I'll send her text to tell her that you two miss her okay?"

Madi nodded, sniffling softly before shoving the nipple of her bottle into her mouth.

He took his phone out of his pocket and checked his messages only to find four missed calls from Alex and five texts.

**_Alex Cabot: Hey its been an hour and Liv hasn't arrived yet. I'm getting worried, did she change her mind and go back home?_**

**_Alex Cabot: Trevor I tried calling her but she isn't answering. I'm really worried now, still no sign of her._**

**_Alex Cabot: Trevor! I've been calling around and then i heard the news headlines, there was a massive accident two blocks away from me. A drucken driver sped into an oncoming car, it looks a lot like Liv's car, they said they're rushing both drivers to mercy so I'm going there to find out._**

**_Alex Cabot: I'm at Mercy hospital and one of the doctors just confirmed that Olivia was in the crash, she is having an emergency surgery done. Please meet me at the hospital!_**

**_Alex Cabot: Trevor answer your phone for fucks sake! Liv just got out of surgery, she passed but she might wake up soon. You need to get here now, because there's something that only you would be able to explain to her._**

He swallowed hard as he read the texts she sent him, and immediately dialed her number, he sat down at the island, keeping an eye on the twins while he waited for her to answer.

"Hey Trev, why the hell haven't you been answering my calls or my texts. I'm at Mercy, where the hell are you?!" she asked in a stressed tone.

He sighed "I'm sorry, I was knocked out and only woke up a few minutes ago. I'm at home with the kids, how is she doing?"

"She's still out of it and she might be for the next few days. Are you coming?" she asked.

He stood to his feet and sniffled "yeah, I'm gonna call my mom to ask her to watch the twins and then I'll come by after dropping them off."

She nodded "okay I'll stay here and keep an eye on her until you get back."

"Alex" he said softly, feeling himself get emotional "is she okay? Is she badly hurt? Will she make it?"

"She's knocked up really bad, she has a broken arm and she suffered a massive blow to the head. They had to stitch it up and bandage it, but they are worried that she might have some issues when she wakes up." she said with a sigh while running her thumb over her best friends hand.

"The baby is still alive though... Doctors say it looks like she somehow managed to cover her stomach and prevent the crash from injuring the baby. They've got a monitor up, checking its heartbeat and an ultrasound machine to ensure that it is okay." she explained.

He nodded, his tears falling freely now "I'll be there as soon as I can. If she wakes up please tell her that I'm on my way. I love her too much to lose her now."

"I'll tell her, see you in a few. Please drive safe" she said before hanging up and focusing on her friend that laid in the hospital bed.

...

Alex sighed as she looked over at the ultrasound machine "oh Liv, you said you didn't want this baby but you still protected it when you were in that crash. You have to pull through because we still need you. Your kids still need you and so does Trevor, I know you two had your words but he is incomplete without you."

She gently pressed her hand to her friend's stomach "I know that by now you've probably changed your mind about this little one. I know you're probably excited about meeting your little Langan, and holding him or her for the first time. There's still so much you have to be here for, so much that you still need to see, so I'm going to need for you to wake up and get better."

Trevor walked into the room and bit back a sob when he saw the state his wife was in, she was covered in bruised and scrapes. Her left arm was in a cast and a bandage was wrapped around her head. She looked worse for wear but he was so happy that she was alive.

He moved over to her and leaned down, pressing a gentle kiss to her lips, before sitting down beside Alex "what happened?"

She shrugged "she was driving and a drucken driver jumped a red light and drove into her at a high speed. Her car swerved and she lost control of it, doctors said that it looks like her arm broke because she was using it to cover her stomach. She was protecting her baby."

He took hold of her hand that wasn't broken and let out a sob "she would have been asleep beside me if I hadn't brought the baby story up. She was in bed, about to take a much needed nap when I started talking about the baby again. I upset her and then she decided to go for a drive, Alex if I had kept my mouth shut she would not have been in this accident. She would have been sleeping safely in my arms, but no, I decided to argue with her when she needed my support. This is my fault."

Alex placed her hand on his shoulder and shook her head "this is not your fault Trevor, you had no way of knowing that this would happen. The only person to blame is the man that got behind the wheel while he was intoxicated. You cannot blame yourself for this, because I know that if you had any way of knowing this would happen you would never have let her walk out of that house."

"I just want my wife back, a few weeks ago we were so happy and enjoying our life. We even planned a trip for our second anniversary. We were going to Paris and Liv was so excited, she could not wait to see all of the sights and have our babies with us. Now look at where we are, stuck in hospital again, with a ton of issues. I don't even care about anything other than her anymore, Alex I love her with my whole heart and if she wakes up and decides that she doesn't want this baby I wouldn't even stop her. As long as I can have my wife back."

She gently rubbed his back as he spoke through his tears "Trev she protected that baby in the crash because when she realised that she might lose it her motherly instincts kicked in. She's going to keep that baby, it may not look like it, but why would she protect a baby she doesn't want. Clearly she changed her mind sometime in the course of her drive or even in the crash. Maybe almost losing the baby was what it took for her to realise that she actually does want it."

He sighed "I just need her to wake up and get better. Our kids need their mother, Noah has been asking for her ever since he woke up and even Madi misses her. I need her to get better so that I can apologise and treat her like the goddess she is. Never in the past did I think it would be possible for me to love somebody this much, but being with Olivia changed everything. I love her with my whole heart."

"and she loves you too, just as much. She always says that she feels like the luckiest woman on the planet to have a husband that loves her so completely. She knows that you care for her and love, she is aware of how perfect you two are for each other."

"I just need her to wake up." he said before pressing a kiss to the back of her hand "that's all I need now beautiful, is for you to wake up so that we can fix things."

* * *

**_Is it too much to ask that you all forgive me???_**

**_How are we feeling??_**

**_I'm sorry about this one. _**


	49. Chapter 49

**Remember.**

**Two weeks later:**

Trevor sat beside his wife's bed and smirked when Elliot came into the room. He motioned for him to sit in one of the spare seats "hey."

He sat down "hey, anything changed yet?"

He shook his head, looking down at his wife that still had not woken up, he took her hand "nope. Her stats have been picking up and the baby is still doing good. They're giving her suppliments through the drip to ensure she gets all the necessary things for the baby. The heartbeat has picked up a lot more and things are looking up, now we just need Liv to wake up."

He nodded, looking at the bruises on her face that was healing "most of her bruises are healed."

"yeah even her broken arm has shown a lot of improvement, although she will have five more weeks with the cast." he said with a sigh "I miss her."

He placed a hand on Trevor's shoulder "she'll pull through, Liv isn't one to just give up. How are the kid's doing?"

"They miss their mother, they can't understand why she won't wake up when they come to visit. Both of them have been very fussy and I know when she does wake up they are going to bombard her." he said with a chuckle "they need her. I need her, these last two weeks have been a complete nightmare. I have never been this stressed before, and I know the kids aren't okay with both of us not being at home."

He sighed "why don't you go check up on them, call your mom and find out if they're okay. I'll keep an eye on Liv and I will call you up if anything happens."

"Okay thanks El" he said before pressing a kiss to her cheek. He lingered for a minute before walking out of the hospital room and dialing his mother's number.

Elliot sat down beside her hospital bed and let out a heavy breath as he took hold of her hand "hey Liv... I miss you Partner."

He leaned closer and sniffled when he felt himself getting emotional "you've been out of it for the last two weeks, today's the day you're supposed to be heading home but I guess those plans have to change. You need to get well Liv, your babies need you, and I can't believe I'm saying this but your husband needs you. We're all worried sick. You have to get better okay?"

He felt her softly squeeze his hand and gasped "Liv are you waking up?" he asked.

Trevor came back into the room after his call and furrowed his brow when he saw the look on Elliot's face "is something wrong?"

He shook his head "no, it's just. I swear that she squeezed my hand"

He moved over to the bed and cupped her cheek gently "Liv, babe. Come on, open those beautiful eyes for me" he said gently.

Her eyes did the slightest flicker but she did not open them. So both men sat down and took a minute to gather their thoughts, the excitement of her possibly waking up was enough to get both of them smiling.

Elliot looked over and Trevor and shrugged "I think that should be a sign that she is going to be okay, she is going to wake up soon and you'll have your wife back."

He nodded while staring at her "I think she just gave me the hope that I thought was lost."

Elliot stood to his feet and took Trevor's hand before greeting and heading home for the evening. He knew Kathy wouldn't mind him popping by to check on Liv but he didn't have much time cause he promised little Eli that he'd be home before bed time.

Trevor sat down beside his wife's hospital bed once again and pressed a kiss to the back of her hand "it's been two weeks Liv, since I've heard your voice. I miss you babe, I feel like a piece of me is missing if I can't have you beside when I wake up in the morning. Our kids, they miss you too, Noah and Madi are growing so fast and all they ever do is ask for their momma. I know these last few weeks have been tough and I have been a dick, not allowing you to process what you were feeling. But I'm sorry, I never meant to hurt you and I want you to know that I would never leave you."

He moved a piece of her hair out of her face and sighed "Liv ever since we started dating we have been together everyday and every night, this is the longest time that I have been without you. I hate it. I hate that you're not awake and laughing and telling our kids all kinds of stories, I hate that you're not arguing with me or teasing me. I can't take this silence."

He laid his head against her stomach and sobbed softly "You need to get better baby, you need to wake up now. So that we can be together again and so that we can go back home."

He stayed with her for the rest of the night, and fell asleep with his head on her thigh, one of his hands resting on her still flat stomach.

...

"Where am I?" came the groggy voice from the hospital bed.

Trevor, who had been standing at the window on his phone, immediately turned to find his wife looking around the room confused. He quickly hung up on his brother and made his way over to her, stopping her before she could try to get out of the bed.

"hey easy there. You're in hospital, I'm going to call a doctor for you okay?" he said while helping her settle back in the bed.

She looked at him in confusion "Langan, what the hell are you doing here?"

He furrowed his eyebrows "Liv you didn't expect me to leave you on your own in hospital did you?"

She frowned "why are you here? What do you want from me? Where's my squad?"

He sighed, realising that something was seriously wrong with her "Olivia, do you know who I am?"

"Of course I know who you are, you're a high priced mouth piece for low life's. A jackass and a good for nothing defense lawyer." she spat.

He recoiled slightly from her, realising that his wife no longer remembered him. He swallowed the lump that arose in his throat and nodded "I- uhh. I'll go call your doctor okay"

She forced a smile "thanks"

He walked out of the room with his head hanging low, his heart was shattered because he realised that if she doesn't remember him, she probably doesn't remember the twins either. How would he explain to their babies that their mother is awake but can't remember a thing about them.

Olivia frowned when Trevor followed her doctor into the room. She looked at the doctor and sighed "does he have to be here?"

The doctor gave her a small smile, having already been informed by Trevor that she has some sort of memory loss. He nodded "well yes, he does have to be here because he is your emergency contact. I just have to check your wound and your arm before asking you a few questions okay?"

She nodded "sure."

Trevor sat down on the far end of the room and watched as Doctor Jax examined her, he wondered how he was going to help her remember their life together when she didn't even want to be in the same room as him. He sent his brother a text to apologise for hanging up on him and explained what was happening.

Doctor Jax finished his examination of her before taking his pen and her folder "So your wounds are looking good, you've healed well. Your arm will be in the cast for a bit longer but that will heal in time, and the little one is doing a-okay." he turned the machine.

"Little one?" Olivia asked with a frown "what little one?"

Trevor sighed "you're pregnant Olivia."

She looked over at him "how? That's not... I'm not even dating anyone. How is that possible?"

He moved closer to her and sat on the edge of her bed "doc could you give us minute, I may need to explain a few things to her first."

He nodded "of course Mr Langan, call me if you two need anything."

She watched the doctor walk out before looking over at Trevor and swallowing the lump in her throat "who's is it?"

He ran a hand through his hair "Liv I'm not sure if you remember, but you were in a car accident two weeks ago."

She laid back and placed her hand on her stomach "I'm pregnant. How is that even possible? I haven't been with a man in over a year."

"Liv you don't remember it but you were with a man, you married him two years ago and you have kids. Twins, they will be a year old next week, they look exactly like you." he tried explaining but he saw the confused look on her face.

She shook her head "no you're wrong, I am single, the last man I dated was an asshole lawyer."

"David Haden" Trevor finished "you two broke up years ago, in fact you were single for three whole years after that relationship because he really hurt you. He used you and dropped you when you needed him the most. Three years after your breakup, you and I were shot, we went into witness protection and eventually started dating."

He took his phone and showed her a their wedding picture "you and I have been happily married for the last two years, we live out in Oregon and you're a Sargent now of your own precinct."

...

Alex sat down beside her friend's hospital bed and smirked "how are you feeling?"

She shrugged "confused. Everybody has been telling me that I married Trevor Langan, but I can't remember it. I can't remember any of the things you all are telling me about. I just want my real life back, I want my job and my apartment."

Alex shook her head "I know this is so hard for you and we're all trying to help you remember." she took her hand and gave it a squeeze "I wish we could just speed up the time and bring your memory forward to the five years that passed."

"So what happens when I have to leave the hospital on Friday? Where am I going?" she asked.

"Well the idea was for you to stay with me until your memory comes back, but after much consideration, we think it might be better for you to stay with Trevor in your own home. Hopefully being there will jog your memory and your babies need you." she explained with a sympathetic smile.

"Makes sense. So I'll meet them on Friday then?" she asked calmly.

"Uh no, you may meet them a bit sooner." she scratched the back of her neck "Trevor's mother has a doctors appointment out in Queens, so she can't look after the twins and everybody else is busy too. So Trevor will have to bring them along when he comes by in the next hour."

Olivia's eyes widened "will they need anything from me?"

She shrugged "they might want to drink, but Trevor will guide you. Liv I know this is strange but you have to trust him when he tries to help you. He won't hurt you"

"How can I trust the enemy? He's a defense attorney and you all are talking like he's some kind of Saint."

"He's not a defense attorney anymore, he left it, for you. Trevor only deals with divorce cases and he works as your attorney for your precinct in Oregon. That man has completly turned his life around for you and you loved him for that and so much more." she said with a smile.

Olivia nodded "There's no point in arguing is there?"

Olivia and Alex spent the rest of the morning just talking and catching up, she felt weird hearing her best friend talk about a life that she could not remember living. Alex told her about Oregon, about all the crap they got up to. She laughed when Alex told her about how her and Trevor were constantly being teased about how loved up they were.

She chuckled "this must be hard for him, going from having me as his wife, to him basically being a stranger to me."

"He's coming to term with it, but he doesn't mind as long as you are alive and well." Alex assured her before reaching over and placing her hand on Olivia stomach "how are you feeling about being pregnant?"

"it's weird that I'm pregnant and can't even remember doing the deed to begin with." she said with a chuckle "I'm feeling all these different emotions and I don't know how to deal with it. Trevor says they're just hormones but I feel like my own body is busy betraying me."

Alex let out a loud laugh "tell me, have you started craving him like you did in your other pregnancy yet?"

She gasped and felt her cheeks flush "last night he was cold so he put on a hoodie and his sweater rode up as he put it on. I caught a glimpse of his skin and suddenly all I wanted was to be pinned down."

Alex chuckled "that's more like the Olivia I know."

* * *

**_Hiii readers, I hope you're all doing well._**

**_I know this was kind of predictable, but it had to be done._**

**_Let me know what y'all think. Reviews are always welcomed._**


	50. Chapter 50

**Stranger.**

Trevor led Olivia into their home and gave her a small smile "we usually share a room but under the circumstances, I prepared the guest room for you."

She nodded "thank you. What about the children?"

He led her into the guest room and allowed her to settle in "they will be in the nursary."

"Where are they now" she asked, sitting down beside him.

"They are with my mom, she's going to drop them in the next hour." He handed her a photo album of theirs "this is their baby photos, you used to love looking through it whenever you felt stressed."

She looked down at the album and ran her fingers over a picture of her sitting in a room she didn't recognise, with her hands on a massive baby bump while Trevor pressed a kiss to her cheek. She looked over at him and raised an eyebrow "what were we like? Together, did we argue all the time?"

He shook his head "we were great. We understood each other and did our best not to argue. Both of us grew majorly in our relationship, and we definitely fought for our marriage."

"Is this weird for you, having your wife sit beside you but you can't touch or kiss me because I can't even remember us being together?"

He took hold of her hand and pressed a gentle kiss to the back of it "it's an odd situation but I am willing to make it work. You are the love of my life and I am willing to do anything to have you back at my side again."

"You're nothing like the Trevor I remember" she admitted, shifting on the bed.

"Well that's because you don't remember the Trevor that you knew out of the office. The one that you fell in love with." he said with a shrug.

She was about to speak but decided against it when she heard a doorbell ringing in the distance. She followed Trevor to the living room and pursed her lips when his mother pushed a double stroller in through the wide front door. Her eyes immediately fell onto the little boy and girl who were lying back in the stroller and suckling peacefully at their pacifiers.

Everybody was silently hoping that seeing the children would bring her memory back, but unfortunately it did not. Instead it made her feel guilty just standing there, because she knew that they would remember her.

Trevor went over to his mother and pressed a kiss to the side of her head "thanks for everything mom."

She gave him a sweet smile "oh honey there is no need to thank me, I love spending time with my grandkids, they keep me feeling young."

"They're beautiful" Olivia whispered nervously.

What she did not expect was that both little ones immediately turned to her when they heard her voice. She watched as their faces lit up and their little arms stretched toward her. A soft gasp left her lips when she heard the word she never thought someone would ever say to her.

"momma!!" both tots squealed in excitement.

Trevor chuckled before leaning down so that he was eye to eye with both tots "I know you have both missed momma but you're going to need to give her some time to get used to this okay?"

They shrugged before fussing to be released from their stroller. He sighed before taking them out and placing both little ones on the ground after kissing them.

Madison who was the splitting image of Olivia looked up at her with piercing blue eyes "momma" she said before walking over to her on unsteady legs.

Olivia leaned down cautiously, taking in every one of the little girls features, she could not believe she actually had a daughter and a son. She had kids, two beautiful toddlers that looked so absolutely precious. She wished that she could somehow remember them, but she didn't, none of this rang any bells. Her mind was screaming that this was a messed up prank, but why would her friends need to pull such a sick prank on her.

Madison stretched her arms out to her mother and smiled happily when Olivia hugged her gently, minding her casted arm "momma home" she whispered softly.

Olivia felt her eyes well up with tears as she held a younger version of herself close. She was at a loss for words, this felt so surreal to her and she had no idea how to even process it.

Noah, who had been standing up against his father, silently crawled toward his mother and gave her a toothy smile "momma better?"

She looked over at the little boy and sighed "hey little guy" she whispered.

Noah moved over to her, and hugged her tightly.

Her tears fell as she held both little ones, she felt guilty, her babies needed her and she could not remember them. To them she was their mother, someone they knew would love and protect them. However to her, they were two adorable little kids that she had no memory of, she had no idea what they were like.

Trevor smiled at the sight infront of him, silently praying that she was crying because she could remember them. However he knew that was an unlikely situation, seeing as she looked weirdly uncomfortable with them in her arms.

Both kids eventually moved out of her embrace and busied themselves with their toys.

Mary gave Olivia a small smile before going into the kitchen with her following behind "how are you feeling?"

She shrugged "I'm okay. I just wish I could remember everything already, because I have all of these people around me that I can see cares for me but I don't know half of them."

She gave Mary a small smile "this is so weird for me, because I don't know Trevor out of the courtroom or the interrogation room. We're usually on opposite sides of the case and now suddenly, we're married and have a family. Its a massive adjustment, especially now that I can't even remember what it was that made me fall for him."

Trevor carried both giggling toddlers into the kitchen and strapped them into their swings "are you two hungry?"

Noah nodded "momma"

Olivia looked over at the little boy nervously, before raising an eyebrow at Trevor "does he want me to uh..."

He nodded "unfortunately yes, he wants you to breastfeed him. They're only a year old and they love you feeding them, it was one of your favourite things to do."

She scratched the back of her neck "is that why my breast feel so weird?"

Mary chuckled "sure is, they're filled with milk for these little ones. Soon they are going to start leaking so I suggest you get used to it."

"How do I-" she stopped with flushed cheeks, feeling a little embarrassed that she had to ask a woman she hardly knew about breastfeeding.

Trevor placed a hand on her shoulder "he knows what to do, and so does Maddy. Come on, I'll help you"

She nodded, knowing that an argument would be pointless "okay but I need you to be patient with me."

He nodded, taking both little ones before giving his mother a smile "will you be able to start on lunch while I help Liv?"

She smiled "of course son."

...

Olivia stepped into the main bedroom and smiled at how beautiful it was "this is beautiful."

"You're the one that decorated it" he said with a laugh.

She smirked "seems like something I would chose, very minimal."

She settled down on the bed and chuckled when Noah excitedly moved to her. Trevor helped her lift the sweater as she only had one functioning arm at the moment.

He cleared his throat, seeing her breast come into view. It had been a while since he saw her and he had a hard time containing himself.

She saw the look on his face and knew that he was having an internal battle. This was an awkward situation for both of them and she didn't blame him for reacting like this. She understood that even though she didn't remember, he did, he remembered everything about them and it was probably difficult for him to have his wife so close yet still so far.

She chuckled as Noah latched onto her breast and began suckling happily "it feels strange."

He sat down beside her "this whole situation is strange... How are you feeling, no cravings yet?"

She shook her head, watching him tickle Madison "not that I know of... I still can't believe what you told me."

"It's true, you didn't want this baby, but I don't know why. I wish I could answer that question but I can't." he said with a soft sigh "however I am glad that I didn't lose you in that crash"

She placed her hand on her stomach "am I going to start showing soon?"

"Possibly, with the twins you started showing around five months, and then they grew immensely thereafter." he chuckled "you were waddling around by the time you hit seven months."

She laughed softly "sounds like a dream... I've always wanted kids, and now I have them."

"You're an amazing mother Olivia, you might not have the memory of it but our babies have been the happiest whenever you were around. They love you and so do I" he said with a warm smile.

She took his hand and squeezed it "thank you and please know that I am doing everything to get back to where I need to be mentally. I'm trying my best to get my memory back."

He shrugged "maybe you should stop trying, and just live in the moment. Enjoy the time you have with these little ones, because they are growing bigger with each passing day."

"I think I can do that" she smiled, running her hand over Noah's back.

...

"Where's Olivia?" Mary asked as her son walked into the kitchen with an unreadable look on his face.

He sat down at the island "she's in our bedroom. She fell asleep with the kids and I didn't have the heart to disturb them so I came down to keep you company."

"Nothing yet?"

He shook his head "nope. She still can't remember anything. Her mind is stuck in a world that happened five years ago, she's not here in the present and it's killing me."

He let out a heavy sigh "my wife, the mother of my children and the love of my life is a stranger to me now."

"Trev she's still the same woman you know and love, only now she has a difficultly that she needs your help with. You need to support her through this no matter how hard it gets, because eventually her memory is going to come back and then you two will be back where you need to be." She assured him with a caring smile.

He sighed softly, this situation was exhausting, he just wanted his wife back. He knew this had to be so much harder for her because she was being surrounded by all these people that she had no memory of. She had to get to know all of them from scratch, which could be extremely stressful.

However he was glad that she took to the children so well, that she was open to breastfeeding them and to him assisting her. Seeing her cuddled up with the twins made him a bit emotional because she looked so natural. She looked like his Olivia, the one he married.

Trevor had no idea how this would all work out, it could take months or years for her memory to come back. They had no surity that it would ever return, they were stuck in a huge 'what if' game and nobody knew when it would end. So many things that used to be a norm in their lives would now be a first time for Olivia.

Casey and Eva had received calls from Trevor, in which he explained to them all that happened and both women were torn at the news. They had both booked leave at their jobs and would be flying to New York in the up coming week. Everybody was hoping that seeing Eva and Casey would bring back her memory since nothing in New York was doing the trick.

Olivia was unaware about the girls flying in and they had decided not to tell her because she had no memory of Eva. Eva was aware of her friend's memory loss and knew that Olivia would not know who she is, so she prepared to do a ton of things to refresh her and to keep her occupied. They knew that the couple had a stressful few weeks and they wanted to do everything in their power to give her a break from that.

"When are the girls coming?" Mary asked while preparing lunch.

Trevor started fixing two cups of coffee "they should be here by Tuesday for the latest. I was thinking that I could take Olivia somewhere tomorrow with the kids."

"Are you sure you're not bombarding her?"

He shrugged "I'll give her the option to stay or not, but I really want to take the kids to the beach while it's hot out and I feel like it would be an amazing bonding opportunity."

* * *

**_How are we feeling?_**

**_She's at home with her family, but her memory isn't back yet..._**

**_Reviews are always appreciated._**


	51. Chapter 51

**Loving You.**

Olivia changed Maddy's diaper and smirked when Trevor walked into the main bedroom, they did a switch and he was now in the guest room but he didn't mind. She was showing a ton of improvement but unfortunately her memory had not returned. Yet she was still making the most of the time they were spending together at the moment.

"Hey are you all packed up?" Trevor asked as he carried a naked Noah into the room.

She shook her head "not yet, I had to put it on hold because somebody" she motioned to a giggling Madison "decided to poo her diaper full so I had to change it."

He placed Noah down on the bed, watching him crawl about "I'm starting to wish that we potty trained them earlier."

She shrugged "well there's no time like the present, plus we have a ton of free time on our hands."

She gently tickled noah "you need to get dressed, you can't be running around butt naked like this."

He giggled "momma dwess me"

Trevor chuckled "it's weird that you're still good with them, even though you have no memory of them."

"I won't lie I expected this to be awkward for me, but they are so cute and tiny that I just cannot keep away from them. I'm sure that I loved them so much." she said with a shrug.

He started finding clothes for the kids while Olivia kept them occupied on the bed. They were working well together and they were finding their footing once again. He was so surprised that Olivia was excited to talk about the baby she was carrying, she asked him a ton of questions about what her pregnancy was like. He told her everything about her pregnancy with the twins but did not tell her about the ectopic pregnancy yet, because he didn't feel that she was ready to face that kind of pain just yet.

"So are you ready for the beach?" she asked with a smile.

Both toddlers cheered happily before falling back in a pile of giggles. Olivia shook her head and looked over at Trevor who had returned with clothes for Noah "how did we handle their noise?"

"I always had a hard time with it, you were the one who handled it well." he sat down beside her and took hold of Noah "your favourite thing was just to sit with them, listening to their laughter and enjoying every moment with them." he sniffled.

She nudged him gently "why are you getting emotional?"

He sighed "because I miss you... I miss us and I feel like all this crap is my fault because honestly, you would have been asleep beside me if I hadn't started talking crap. Every morning you wake up and still can't remember, is another day I blame myself, because you were so disturbed that you decided to go out and drive to Alex and then that accident happened. Liv I'm the reason you can't remember our children, this is all my fault. I'm so sorry" he sobbed.

She pulled him into her arms and held him close, feeling his body shake "hey, I have no idea what happened between us or why it happened. But I know that what we have is special, I have seen the way you look at me and I know that you love me more than any man has before. You can't blame yourself for this." she ran her fingers through his hair.

"I love you so much and I made a promise that I would never make you cry and I broke that promise Liv. I hurt you and I'm the reason you walked out of that door, I'm so sorry babe, I didn't want any of this to happen." he sobbed, sounding absolutely heartbroken.

She cupped his cheek and wiped his tears away "hey it's okay. I'm still here and I don't think it's your fault in any way. I don't blame you for any of this" she pulled him closer, holding him and comforting him as he let it all out.

Noah and Madi sat beside their parents and watched their father cry, both of them unsure of what was happening.

Madison furrowed her eyebrows "why dadda cwying?"

She turned to Madison and gave her a small smile "daddy just has a lot on his mind right now princess. Come on, let's go see what grandma is up to."

She gently moved away from Trevor before scooping both little one's up and taking them to his mother. She asked her to keep an eye on them for a few minutes and explained what was happening to her.

Within a few minutes she was back upstairs and laying down with Trevor in her arms as he sobbed. It was clear that he was overwhelmed with emotions and exhausted, and she was strangely comfortable with holding him.

She had no idea what she was feeling but she knew that he needed her now, he had been her pillar in the last few weeks. Holding her when she broke down, giving her space when she needed it, and calming her down whenever everything became too much for her to handle.

Now it was her turn to be there for him, to be his pillar while he broke down, while he finally let his pent up emotions out. Her fingers gently tangled in his hair and massaged his scalp while his arms were wrapped around her midsection. His large hand resting on her tiny baby bump that had formed over the last few weeks.

"I love you so much, I'm so sorry Liv. God knows I never meant for any of this to happen, I was just so hurt and angry that I couldn't keep it to myself." he sobbed, his tears falling heavily onto her skin "I love you"

"Shh" she kissed the top of his head, her need to comfort him over powering every other thought in her mind "it's okay. I'm here and I'm okay, we're okay"

"No we're not, you can't even remember me, you can't remember us, and the love we shared" he whispered, his tears easing up.

She gently lifted his face so that he was staring into her brown eyes and gave him a small smile "so help me remember... Make love to me" she whispered.

He was shocked by her request and furrowed his eyebrows "are you sure?" he asked as gently as he could "Liv you don't have to do this for me."

She let out a soft laugh "I'm not doing this for you, I'm doing it for us. I want to feel you, loving me. I need it" she whispered, feeling her own eyes well up with tears.

He was hesitant at first but after asking three times he decided to give in, hoping that he was making the right decision. Their lips met in a slow, passion filled kiss that escalated into a full blown make out session within minutes. Trevor was hesitant with his movements and did not want to overwhelm her so he took her slowly.

She gasped when he pushed into her, finding herself speechless by just the sheer size of him. She had never been filled up so completely before and she was starting to understand why she married him more and more with each passing day. Her hips met his thrust for thrust and their hands did a ton of exploring, their lips however remained glued together.

Olivia was rendered speechless as he made love to her, she made no sounds because her body was in pure overdrive. She had hoped that having him like this would bring her memory back, but it didn't, so instead she enjoyed the feeling. Her back arched as she came undone for the third time, the nails of her uncasted hand dug into the skin of his back.

Trevor tried his absolute best to hold himself off but it was getting harder, he slowed his movements and looked down at her "Liv, if we don't stop I'm going to come."

She wrapped her legs around his waist and flashed a smile at him "that was kind of the idea" she pressed her lips to his again.

A moan left her lips when she felt him release inside of her, her eyes closing at just the feel of him swelling and releasing his load in her most intimate parts. She came again, moaning as her legs shook around him, and suddenly she was in tears as a feeling of pure love encased her.

Trevor looked down at her with concern in his eyes and gently wiped her tears "hey, hey, why the tears?" he caressed her cheek "are you having regrets?"

She shook her head and wrapped her arm around his shoulders "no. These are happy tears"

"Did you remember something?" he asked, excitement evident in his voice.

"I remember the first time we made love" she whispered, her eyes glassy with tears "it was storming... You held me through the thunderstorm and I fell asleep so peacefully. Other than that I don't remember anything else."

He felt his own eyes fill with tears "Liv that is amazing, it's a sign that your memory is coming back."

She sniffled softly "I'd like that. For now though, I think this baby is messing with me because we just had mind blowing sex, but I'm horny again."

He let out a soft laugh "I could help you with that"

"you might have to help everytime I feel this way" she giggled, moving them so that she was on top of him.

He ran his hands over her thighs as she straddled him "I would be honoured."

* * *

Alex placed Noah down on the towel and handed him a toy to keep him occupied. She watched his sister move over to him and start playing with the toys and the soft white sand.

Olivia settled down beside the toddlers and smiled down at them "I still can't believe I have two kids" she let out a sigh "they are beautiful and I feel like somehow, I must have done something right to end up with such a great family."

"Trevor loves you so much more than any of us could ever explain, you two were so in love." she took hold of her hand "how are things with you two?"

Olivia bit her lip and shrugged "we had sex this morning..."

Alex gasped "what!?" she was speechless "How?"

"it just happened... He was crying and apologising, blaming himself for the accident and my memory loss. I was comforting him and one thing led to another... Eventually we had sex." she said with flushed cheeks.

"Liv, do you regret it?" she asked cautiously.

She shook her head "no, I enjoyed every bit of it. Alex I might not remember our marriage or anything, but I'm a woman with needs. Trevor's a man and he has needs too, we were both willing to give each other the release." she bit her lip, her cheeks flushed at the memory of what they had done that morning "I'm not sure if it's because I'm hormonal and pregnant, but that was some of the best sex I've ever had. He knows how to work with what he has."

She let out a hearty laugh at her friend "You're sounding more and more like the Olivia we've been with the last two years. You could not stop talking about how good he makes you feel, and how happy you two were."

She pursed her lips "hopefully I'll get back there someday."

Madison looked up at her mother and noticed the sad expression on her face, she immediately made it her mission to cheer her up. She trotted the short distance toward her and gave her a toothy grin before handing her a bucket.

"momma make sandtaso" she said with a wide smile.

Olivia's face lit up and she moved closer to where Noah and Madison were playing "should we have a sandcastle challenge?"

Noah smirked "yes momma"

Alex laughed softly at the toddlers "okay give me those buckets and I'll get us some water while you two decide who's team you wanna be on."

Noah turned to his mother and moved over to her "me be with momma."

Madison pouted "no, momma with me"

Olivia chuckled before kissing both of their foreheads "how about we take turns, Noah with me first and then Madi with me second. So that both of you get to be with me and aunt Alex, how does that sound?"

Both tots giggled and nodded before continuing to play with the toys that surrounded them.

"Madi do you know that you're gonna be a big sister soon?" she asked softly.

Madison frowned, confusion coating her little features "why?"

"Because mommy is pregnant... I've got a baby in my stomach" she said with a laugh.

Noah looked at her stomach and smirked "a baby?"

"Yeah, you're both going to have a little sister or brother soon. Are you excited?" she asked.

Both little one's shrugged, neither of them really understanding what big changes would soon come their way. They pressed their hands to their mother's stomach, neither of them noticing the tiny bump that was beginning to form. After a short while they focused their attention back on the toys and squealed happily when Alex brought the water for the sandcastles.

They spent the afternoon building sandcastles and chasing the twins around. Both toddlers squealed when they were taken to the water and went about kicking and screaming with joy. The day was filled with laughter and fun, something all of them missed.

On the way home Alex smirked over at Olivia who was staring at the sleeping babies in their car seats "penny for your thoughts?"

She turned to her friend, a smile on her lips "they are beautiful. I love them so much, my heart feels like its about to burst everytime they call me 'momma'. Alex this is the life I've always dreamed of and now I have it."

"Liv this is the life you deserve, the life you created. You and Trevor took the leap and both of you made the choice to be together, regardless of what anybody would think or say. When you had to choose between him or Elliot, you followed your heart and chose Trevor, and a day before the accident you told me how much you love him. How happy you were that you chose him."

"It's all so strange. It feels to me like I went to bed and woke up in a whole other time period. The yesterday's you speak of are so different to the one's I remember. I remember going through a break up recently and drowning myself in work to get over it. I don't remember having a loving husband and two gorgeous children, and a third one on the way. But I'm glad I have all of this."

"This reality, this life is one hundred times better than the one I can remember. This is filled with love and family." she pursed her lips "it feels like a dream and I don't want to lose it. Most of the time I'm afraid that if I close my eyes I might wake up back in my apartment, without my family... Without Trevor"

She furrowed her eyebrows "Liv what are you saying?"

"I'm scared Al... I'm terrified to get too close to the twins because I fear that I might never remember them. I'm terrified that Trevor might get tired of trying to get my memory back and might leave me for someone else. I have this uncertainty that I just can't shake."

"Trust me when I say this, that man loves you. He loves you with his whole heart, he will never leave you."

* * *

**_Soooo..._****_How are we feeling?!_****_Reviews are always nice. _**


	52. Chapter 52

**Piecing Together. **

A month had come and gone for the Langan family and there was still no sign of Olivia's memory making a reappearance. She was down in the dumps recently because she still could not remember her marriage or family. Her emotions were starting to get the better of her and she was becoming more and more snappy with each passing day.

Trevor understood that she was not only facing her amnesia but also her hormones. He did everything he could to make her happy and to ensure that she felt loved and taken care of. He even had his mother or Thomas take the twins away for an hour or two each day to give her a break and to ensure that she was not overwhelmed by their presence.

"Is it strange? That I'm here in flesh but my mind is still stuck in the past?" she asked softly while running her fingers over the little hairs that lightly littered his chest.

He shrugged "it is kind of strange, because there are many times that I want to bring certain topics up but then I realise you won't remember it. I am happy though, happy that you are alive and healthy, I thought I was going to lose you."

She placed her hand on her tiny swell, it had grown a bit since she had woken up a month ago and it was becoming more and more evident that she was expecting. Her hand rested against Trevor's caressing the little bump.

"It's about the baby isn't it?" she pursed her lips "I wish I could tell you why I said all those things but I don't know. I can't answer your questions because my mind is a blank slate, this is all new to me."

"Do you want the baby now though? How do you feel about being pregnant at the moment?" he asked gently.

A massive smile spread on her lips "I'm excited, It's scary because it feels like my first time being pregnant. But I am excited to meet our baby and buy it all the cute clothes and just to spoil him or her. I definitely want to keep the baby" her smile faded slightly "I've always wanted to be a mother so I have no idea why I would want to abort our baby."

"You didn't say that you wanted to abort it, you just said that you weren't ready and you didn't want the baby." he explained.

"Well I want this baby, I don't care what I said then. I want this child because it's our baby, and I love it so much already."

...

"Hey, how are you and that little one doing?" Elliot asked as he sat down beside Olivia on the park bench.

She looked up at him "we're okay, as good as can be... How are you doing El?"

He shrugged "I'm okay, I just miss you. Having you back was so exciting since I haven't seen you in over a year, and then the accident happened."

She took hold of his hand and gave it a gentle squeeze "I miss you too. You hardly ever come visit me" she pursed her lips "is it because I married Trevor?"

Elliot let out a laugh before shaking his head "no. I just don't want to overwhelm you, you're working so hard trying to piece everything together. I don't want to throw you off track."

"Why would you throw me off track? You're my best friend" she shrugged.

"Because I'm still in love with you" he said with a sigh, watching as a look of shock registered on her face.

She pursed her lips, not saying anything for a minute or two. She cleared her throat, feeling herself getting nervous.

"El..."

"I know you're married to Trevor and I am so happy that you found the man you wanna be with forever but that doesn't change anything." he ran his hand over his face "you're all I think about and half of the time I find myself asking 'what if', we could have been happy Liv. We could have had the life that we always dreamed of, I tried to shake the thought but I feel like life is giving us another chance."

She looked up at him wide eyed, feeling herself getting emotional "El I can't. I have a family, you have a family... Both of us are too unavailable, and let's face it, you still love Kathy."

"Do you love Trevor?"

A slight blush creeped onto her cheeks at the question and she shrugged "Love is a strong word, but I do like him."

Elliot sighed "well then, I best be on my way. I'll see you around Liv"

She watched him get up and walk off before she could respond and scoffed "that's real mature Elliot!" she hollered after him.

She watched him walk away and let out a frustrated groan before getting up and walking back in the direction of the house. A massive sigh fell from her lips, when she walked in and saw a woman she didn't recognise sitting on the sofa.

Her eyes focused on the woman but she could not place her, she had no idea who it was but the twins clearly did because Noah was in her arms.

Trevor walked into the livingroom and gently placed his hand on Olivia's shoulder, forcing her out of her reverie.

"Liv this is Eva, she's one of your best friends from Oregon. You two were extremely close, she's Casey's cousin." he explained, noticing that she looked confused.

Her eyebrows instantly furrowed "Casey's cousin?" she pursed her lips "why would Casey have a cousin out in Oregon?"

"It's a long story, that we will be taking you through later when Cas returns from her with her girlfriend."

"Girlfriend?" Olivia moved to sit down opposite her, "Casey has a girlfriend?"

"Casey has been dating Alex for a few months now, they basically moved in together until Alex came back to the city for work." Eva sighed.

Olivia pursed her lips "that's a lot to take in. So much has changed, and everyday I learn more and more about what is going on in my life."

Trevor noticed her getting emotional and immediately took hold of her hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.

"That's why we're all here, we are going to help you through this. Everyone of us love you and care for you, and we want to do everything to help you get through this and get back to where you need to be." he said with a warm smile.

She sniffled softly "It's just so difficult, having all of these people around me every day that know everything about me. I feel like a stranger to my own life and I hate it, I hate every single moment of it and it's exhausting."

Eva placed Noah on the ground gently before moving over to Olivia and pulling her in for a hug, "you can do this, you are going to get through this."

Olivia let out a pain filled sob and held onto Eva, feeling her entire body shake as she cried for what felt like the hundredth time.

Noah saw his mother crying and crawled over to her, he stood up against her legs and tilted his little head to the side, a smile on his lips.

"momma, up up" he said while holding onto her leg.

Olivia moved out of Eva's embrace and picked the toddler up, allowing him to rest on her legs "hey baby boy, where is your sister?"

He shrugged before placing a hand on his mother's tiny bump "is baby?"

"Yes love, there's a baby in my stomach" she said with a laugh.

Noah pressed a kiss to her bump and gave his mother a toothy grin "me kiss baby."

Trevor smirked "this is my little charmer, and my princess is in the kitchen with my mom." he stood to his feet "speaking of the kitchen, I need a snack."

Olivia pressed a kiss to his forehead "you know exactly how to make momma feel better."

Eva had a massive smile on her lips "he's always been your little baby boy. Maddy is a daddies boy, and you loved that."

"It's strange though, waking up one day and finding out that your life is nothing like what you remember it being. Now I have an entire family and every morning I wake up, seeing both babies on the bed, laughing and playing with their father." she let out a laugh "he is an amazing father, and he loves our babies with his entire heart. He is such an amazing lover, and I am so happy that we ended up together."

"awww Liv, I'm glad you two are happy. How are you feeling with the little one though?" she gently placed her hand on her bump.

"I love it. We have an appointment tomorrow and we're both really excited to find out what is happening with this little one."

"What do you want it to be?" she asked with a smirk "any preferences?"

"I'm not sure, we've already got a boy and a girl, so I won't mind either gender." she said with a shrug.

Trevor returned to the living room, with Madison on his arm and a bowl of ice cream in his free hand. He handed Olivia the bowl of ice cream and pressed a kiss to her forehead "I figured you would want some of this"

"thank you Trev" she smiled up at him before shoving a spoonful of ice cream into her mouth.

...

"What did you think about Eva?" Trevor asked as he laid beside Olivia in their bed.

She shrugged before taking his hand and placing it against her little bump "I like her, she's funny and sweet. She's good with the babies."

"they love her very much, you, Eva and Casey would just go out together and spend time together. They were always with you, and the twins were always with you all." he explained.

"I would give anything to remember that. To remember us, what we did and our love, I want so badly to know how we got together." she cuddled closer to him.

"You will get there eventually babe, it just takes time." he pressed a kiss to her shoulder "and I will be right by your side for however long it takes. It doesn't have to be today or tomorrow, but I know at some point you're going to look at me with those gorgeous brown eyes and you're going to tell me about how you remember everything."

She leaned up and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips "thank you, for being patient with me and going with me yesterday to get that awful cast off my arm."

He took her arm and pressed a kiss to it "I am just very happy that you are doing okay. I love you."

She pressed another kiss to her lips and pulled him closer "mm show me" she whispered against his lips.

He let out a soft laugh "I love your hormones"

A playful gasp left her lips "only because you want to have sex all the time."

"Can you blame me?" he asked, moving so that she was straddling him "I cannot get enough of you, never could and I probably never will."

She rolled her eyes "sweet talk will get you everywhere."

"I'm aware" he teased.

She leaned down and gave him a kiss to silence his banter, a smile tugging at her lips when she felt him squeeze her ass cheeks. She let out a soft moan "easy big boy, I'm in charge."

He smirked "don't make me wait too long."

She silenced him with another kiss and soon began making her way down his body, she had just reached her intended destination, pressing gentle kisses to his hardened shaft when they heard someone banging on the door.

Olivia pulled away from him with a start and immediately grabbed her robe, slipping it on while Trevor covered himself up as well. The banging on the bedroom door continued until Olivia opened the door and found Eva standing there with a tear stained face.

"Eva, what's wrong?" she asked.

Eva let out a sob "Thomas broke up with me."

Trevor furrowed his eyebrows "What? Why would he do that?"

She moved into the room and sat down on the edge of the bed "everything just happened so fast. We were talking things through and I told him about the incident and he just flipped out because I kept it from you and he's now pissed at me and Liv for not saying anything."

"Saying anything about what? What incident?" Olivia asked, confusion clouding her features.

Eva shook her head "I can't tell you right now. I'm sorry for barging in here like this, I just needed a minute with you."

Olivia watched her rush out of the room and frowned, it was obvious that she had said something she was not supposed to. She wanted to know what the incident was and what it had to do with her.

Trevor moved back over to her and began kissing her neck, but her mind was so consumed with questions that she could not focus on anything else right now. There was something strange going on and she was trying to put the pieces together in her mind. She had a hectic day, with Elliot's admission, meeting Eva and now finding out that she had been involved in some sort of incident that tore Eva and Thomas apart.

* * *

**_Feelings? Thoughts?_** **_Reviews? _**


	53. Chapter 53

**Carolina.**

Trevor looked down at his sleeping wife and let out a sigh, she looked so beautiful and peaceful as she slept beside him. She did not have the best night, after Eva barged in she seemed disturbed and didn't go to sleep until the early morning hours.

He had been awake with her, trying his best to keep her calm, and after she eventually fell asleep he stayed up to ensure that she was truly okay.

He tried to play it down last night, but he too was wondering what Eva was on about. However he decided to find out by Thomas what it was all about, because he knew that Eva wouldn't tell him. Olivia was of no help in this situation because she had memory loss, she had no idea what Eva was referring to.

"Hey love birds" Casey said while barging into the room.

Trevor looked over at her and raised an eyebrow "ever heard of knocking?"

She shrugged "knocking is overrated. I have already seen you two fucking so that won't be a shock to me. How is she?"

He looked down at her sleeping form again "exhausted. She was having a hard time falling asleep."

"Eva told me about what happened" she pursed her lips "do you know what incident she was referring to?"

"I don't, but it had to be pretty bad for Thomas to have broken up with Eva over it." Trevor responded.

Casey scratched the back of her neck "yeah... I have to go check up on Eva, but let Liv know that we have a lunch date when she wakes up."

He nodded "sure, thanks Cas"

...

"How are you feeling?" Casey asked as she sat opposite Olivia in the restaurant they used to catch up in on busy days.

Eva was seated beside Casey and kept her eyes focused on her cup of coffee, knowing that Olivia was going to bring up the reason she and Thomas broke up. She was not in the mood to speak about it, in fact all she wanted was to go back home and drown herself in her work.

"I'm okay..." she sighed "Eva, how are you feeling?"

She shrugged "not really sure, I don't really know how to feel right now. I just can't believe it's over."

"Aww honey, he will realise he made a mistake soon enough and he will come running right back to you, because he loves you." Alex said, reaching over and taking Eva's hand into her own.

Casey pursed her lips "I feel that he's being a little unfair at holding that against you. It was a sensitive situation and all you did was respect Liv's wishes."

Alex nodded "you didn't do anything wrong. You did not owe him an explanation because to be fair it's none of his business."

"What is the big secret that tore you two apart? What role do I play in it?" Olivia asked with a frown.

Eva shook her head "I'm not going to tell you, because the last thing I want is to upset you while you're pregnant."

"I agree with Eva" Casey added, "it will be better if we just allow you to remember on your time."

Olivia rolled her eyes "ugh this sucks. I just want to remember my life and everything already."

Alex nudged her playfully "hey atleast you and Trevor are in a good space."

"True. I don't think it's gonna stay that way though" she bit her lip, playing with her wedding band "Elliot told me he still loves me yesterday."

"What?" Alex quipped "why the hell would he do that?"

"Because he's a selfish jackass. He didn't win her the first time he tried this stunt because she was so in love with Trevor. Now that she has amnesia and can't really remember their relationship and how or why they fell in love, he's trying again because he thinks he has a better shot." Casey said with an angry scoff.

Eva shook her head "Didn't he promise to support her marriage and be a friend to her? Now he's trying to sabotage her for his own gain."

Olivia scowled as she listened to her friends "girls relax. I know that Elliot and I won't work out because he is married and Kathy is still madly in love with him. I have a family now, and I won't go ripping them apart now. Plus I've got a baby on the way, the last thing I want is to give birth and raise my baby without it's biological father."

"Do you have feelings for Elliot?" Alex asked.

Olivia shrugged, taking a sip of her juice "yes I do. But before you all jump down my throat, I need you all to take into consideration the fact that I can't remember ever moving on from him. My mind is still at the place where I was single and in love with my married partner. It's going to take time for me to be in a place where it's just Trevor, because right now, I'm still getting to know him."

Eva pursed her lips "Do you love Trevor?"

A slight blush spread across her cheeks "I really like him... He's a great man, and lord he's good in bed." she giggled.

All four women laughed at her admission, Casey shook her head "glad to see that you are still as horny as we remember"

She let out a laugh "hey, I have every reason to be horny. I have a baby that is making me very hormonal, and a man who knows exactly how to give me the release I need."

"That man loves you so damn much" Eva said with a smile "you really hit the jackpot with him."

"I know" she said with a smile "I realise that more everyday. I see him with the twins, the way he loves them warms my heart, seeing him with them is the best thing ever. Then at night when he thinks I'm asleep he will speak to my bump, telling our baby how much he loves it already. He has so much love for our kids and even for me, he makes sure that I feel it and know it."

Alex smirked "that's good, so are you excited to be leaving tomorrow?"

She shrugged "sure. He's taking on a trip he thinks might help me remember us and the love we share. So I'm excited, plus it will give us some time to get to know each other better."

"I am somewhat sad though, because I'm going to miss you girls... Even you Eva, because I feel like we all just really connect well."

Eva smirked "Liv we have a ton of time together. Take the two weeks away with your husband and get your mind in perspective. Get Elliot out of your head and remember the love you and Trev share. Spend time with your babies and take care of this little one, when you get back, I will be here to piss you off. Plus I've got a relationship to fix."

"So you're going to try and fix things?" Alex asked hopefully.

"I'm going to try" she said with a smile.

...

"Are you packed?" Trevor asked as he took his suitcase to the car.

Olivia stood with Madison in her arms and nodded "yes I have everything packed, stop stressing."

He walked over to her and pressed the a kiss to the side of her head "I'm sorry, I'm just really excited to get a bit of alone time for the five of us."

She let out a laugh "I am too. I feel like North Carolina is going to be fun, plus it's where we started off our journey."

"I'm just hoping that retracing our steps is what will bring your memory back." he said before pressing a kiss to Madison's forehead.

Madison looked up at her father and blew a raspberry at him before cuddling into her mother's arms "Momma"

"I'm here baby girl" she said with a smile before kissing her daughter's cheeks "why are you even awake right now?"

"Because she's a light sleeper like you, whereas Noah sleeps like a rock" Trevor said while moving a few more things to the car.

"Noah sleeps like you" she said with a laugh "he snores like you too."

"I do not snore and neither does my little guy." he defended before going upstairs to get his son from his crib.

Olivia sat down with Madison in her arms and gently lifted her sweater, she ran her fingers through her daughters hair as she drank peacefully.

Madison's eyes fell closed within minutes and eventually she was knocked out once again.

Olivia let out a breath "I wish I could remember you baby girl, you and brother, I wish I could remember all the moments we shared. Your first words, first everything else."

"You'll remember it eventually" Trevor said while standing at the foot of the staircase with Noah in his arms.

"I'm ready to go" She said with a smile.

He nodded and carried his son to the little boy to the car with Olivia trailing behind him. They strapped both sleeping children into their car seats. They were both nervous about taking the kids on an eight hour drive, knowing that they could start throwing massive tantrums. But there was no turning back now, they already packed up and started on their drive.

Olivia looked out of the window and pursed her lips, the Elliott situation was playing on her mind since she spoke to the girls and she wasn't sure if she should tell Trevor or not. She didn't want to dig up old skeletons but she also didn't want to purposefully keep things from him.

What does it matter? You're never gonna be with him anyway.

She shook her head, a way of silencing her thoughts. She looked over at Trevor who was focused on the road ahead of them "When we were in North Carolina did we ever have sex?"

He shook his head "no, this is where our journey together started, but at that time we were just two people forced to live together and act like a couple."

"Were we atleast friends?" she asked with a frown.

"Not really, you were very distant at first. You missed New York and your squad, so you didn't really talk much until a few days in. After we met our neighbours, you started opening up and talking to me more often, without biting my head off."

She placed her hand on her bump and sighed "sounds like I was horrible to you... What were our neighbours like?"

He shrugged "they were okay, there was this pair that you couldn't stand though and there names are Benthany and Alicia. I was scared that you would kill them" he said with a chuckle.

Her eyes widened "I remember them... They're sisters and one of them kept flirting with you while the other bothered me with personal questions."

A smile spread on his lips "your memory is coming back in pieces. It's a good sign, soon you might remember everything and then we will be able to go back home and continue our lives."

"I look forward to that..." she forced a smile.

"You don't sound happy. Are you okay?" he asked cautiously.

She shrugged "I'm fine, just tired."

...

They arrived in North Carolina after a long drive and quickly settled into the house they used to stay in. Trevor managed to get it as a rental for the two weeks they would be staying, in the hopes that being back here would speed up her memory return.

Olivia checked the house out, an unreadable expression on her face as she set their things up in the master bedroom. The babies were awake and in the kitchen with Trevor, while she took a minute to herself.

She ran her hand over her little bump and felt her eyes welling up, she looked down at her bump and sighed "I don't know if you can hear me or not, but I need to talk to someone. Right now you're my best option because you can't tell anybody what I said."

She sniffled "I'm scared. I'm so scared to get my memory back, because it might lead to me not wanting you again. I love you already, feeling you grow inside of me everyday is something I dreamed of since I was a little girl, and I can't believe that the same woman who wanted a family all her life would threaten to abort her baby. It doesn't make sense and I don't want to feel that way about you."

Trevor stood outside their bedroom and heard his wife's tearful admission. He was coming up to call her for dinner when he heard her talking, at first he was confused but soon he realised that she was in fact speaking to their unborn child. He so badly wanted to hold her and tell her that it was going to be fine, but he couldn't. Because he didn't know if it would be fine, he shared the same fear that she had. He so badly wanted her to get her memory back, but a massive part of him feared that she might not want their baby again. That having her memory back would trigger the feeling she had when they found out about her pregnancy.

He didn't want to lose her or their baby, but the fear was becoming more of a reality with each passing day.

* * *

**_Any thoughts? _**


	54. Chapter 54

**Julia.**

Trevor walked into the room after a minute or two and moved to sit down beside her. He placed a loving kiss to the side of her head, wrapping his arms around her shaking form.

Olivia held onto him for a short while before gently pushing him away from her "I'm okay, we need to go downstairs, the twins are alone." she sniffled

He wiped the last of her tears away and pressed a kiss to her temple "they are strapped in their swings, but you're right." he took her hand and led her downstairs into the kitchen.

Noah and Madison sat in their swings and suckled peacefully on their pacifiers. Noah looked up at his mother and gave her a smile "momma." he stretched his arms out to her.

Trevor chuckled "he's a mother's boy through and through. You take a moment with them and I'll finish up our stir fry, by the way we need to go grocery shopping."

"We can do it tomorrow, that way they will get out of the house and I will get to see more of this place."

"Sounds like a great idea" he said while finishing up their meals.

Olivia tickled Noah gently, watching as he scrunched up his face in laughter "you like that huh?"

"Uh huh" he nodded with a smile "up up" he stretched his arms to her.

She scooped him out of the swing and pressed a kiss to his forehead "can you give momma a cuddle?"

Noah wrapped his arms around her neck and pressed a sloppy kiss to her cheek. While Madi squealed with excitement "momma!"

"Looks like sissy wants some loving too. We should move this party to the living room and then daddy can finish up here." she said before carefully picking Madi up.

She carried both toddlers to the living room and placed them down on the carpet before sitting down beside them. She watched as they looked around and took in their new surroundings, both of their eyes wide with wonder and excitement.

Madison stood up against the table and let out a happy squeal before tapping her hands down on the wooden coffee table. She hummed and mubbled on in gibberish while hitting on the table, a wide smile on her face. Showing off her four little teeth.

Olivia laughed lightly "what are you doing missy?"

Madison looked over at her mother and shrugged, before babbling on and continuing her antics.

Noah watched his sister for a short while before crawling over to his mother and pressing his hand to her bump. He stayed in her arms until Trevor came into the living room with their food.

Both twins immediately moved toward their father which made Olivia laugh "these two never seize to amaze me."

He sat down beside her and took hold of Noah, feeding him a forkful of the stir fry.

He fed the little boy while Olivia fed Madison, both little ones ate happily while their parents shared light conversation.

Olivia wiped Madison's face "it's so quiet here, and peaceful."

"Yeah that was one of your favourite things about this place. The peace, you loved it. Same with Oregon, you enjoyed the peace and the slow life for once."

She raised a brow at him "when are we going back to Oregon, I know we can't stay here or in New York forever because we both have jobs to do."

"Well we have two weeks here and then we head back to New York. You will be staying there for as long as you want because you're not cleared to go back to work until the doctor deems you fit. Which they will do once the amnesia clears up, also with you being pregnant, you might go onto perminent desk duty until after you return from maternity leave." he explained.

"What about you? When do you have to return?"

He sighed "I've been meaning to tell you this, but I will be flying to Oregon after we leave here."

She frowned "so I have to fly to New York alone, with two toddlers while I'm pregnant?"

"No. I was going to fly back with you, spend the day with you and the kids and then fly out the night once they were in bed."

"How long are you going for?"

He shrugged "a week. I just have to sort out a few things so that I can work from here, I'm trying my best to figure something out that won't keep me away from you and the kids."

She pursed her lips "I don't want to go to Oregon... New York is my home and this is strange enough for me, this whole life we have is strange. I'm trying to fall back into routine with it, but moving to Oregon is a stretch."

"I understand and I won't force you to join me. I know this is difficult and it's going to take a lot of getting used to on your behalf. You can take as long as you need." he kissed her cheek.

She gave him a tight lipped smile "we should probably get these two ready for bed."

"Yeah, they might become cranky soon if we don't." he laughed.

...

Trevor looked down at Olivia as she laid cuddled up with both toddlers, sleepy expressions on all three of their faces "you three look exhausted."

Olivia let out a laugh when both babies yawned in response "yeah that flight really messed us up" she said with a smile.

"Well we don't have anywhere to be so we can sleep in if you want" he said with a shrug, handing her a cup of tea.

She pressed a kiss to both babies forehead's "that sounds like a great plan."

He moved onto the bed and allowed Noah to cuddle into his arms, he let out a laugh when the little boy moved to lay down on his chest.

Olivia smirked "he's been doing that with every opportunity he gets"

Trevor laughed, placing his hand on his sleepy son's back "he slept like this when he was a baby, him and Maddy loved laying on our chests."

"Soon that won't be possible with me, because this little one is going to get a lot bigger." she said with a smile.

"I can't wait for that to happen, you've already got the glow" he said with a smile, moving a piece of her hair behind her ear.

Her cheeks flushed under his intense stare "what glow?"

He pressed a kiss to her lips, a smile breaking into their lip lock "your pregnancy glow."

She let out a soft laugh "hm I like the sound of that"

...

"Maddy, baby get that out of your mouth" Trevor said as he looked down at his daughter who had a rattle in her mouth.

Olivia looked down at her and shook her head "give momma the rattle baby girl."

Madison frowned and pushed out her lower lip when her mother took the rattle out of her mouth. She frowned before letting out loud piercing cries, thick tears instantly started rolling down her cheeks.

Olivia sighed "you can't eat the rattle, princess, here, take the paci."

The toddler pushed the pacifier away and began kicking her little legs, her loud cries echoing throughout the otherwise empty isle.

Noah laid on his side of the stroller, suckling peacefully at his paci while holding his little Teddy close to his chest.

Trevor scooped his daughter out of the stroller and bounced her gently, until her cries turned into little hiccups.

Olivia shook her head "sometimes I think she hates me"

"She doesn't hate you, she's a baby and babies throw tantrums all the time." he said, pressing a kiss to her forehead.

Olivia reached for Madison and let out a breath, wiping her daughter's tears "you've been very moody lately"

Trevor smirked "she's teething"

"Why didn't we get them teething rings?" she asked with a frown.

Once Madison was calm she placed her back in the stroller with her pacifier. She checked on Noah before moving back to the stroller and began pushing them again.

Trevor walked beside her pushing a cart filled with a few things they would need over the next two weeks.

"We should check the baby isle for some teething rings"

"That sounds like a brilliant idea, because I'm sure she's going to get more and more moody as the days go by. I'll go ahead and check it out while you get the things for tonight's dinner." Olivia said before making her way out of the Isle.

Trevor took the groceries he needed and was heading toward the isle his wife disappeared into, stopping when he heard a loud squeal from behind him.

Trevor turned and sighed when he saw the two women he definitely wasn't hoping to see. Bethany and Alicia came rushing toward him with massive smiles on their faces, and he instantly knew that they would be popping by every other day.

Bathany smirked "Hi Mike, its been forever since we've seen you. You and Julia just disappeared and we have been waiting for your return."

Alicia smirked when she saw that he was alone "Why did you guys leave so suddenly?"

He scratched the back of his neck, trying to come up with something "we uh, we had a family emergency that we needed to attend to. How are you two doing?"

"We are much better now that you're back... Are you alone?" Alicia asked with a massive smile.

"uh" he started.

Bethany gasped, cutting him off "don't tell me you and Julia got divorced... I'm so sorry. That's really sad to hear."

He shook his head "no we didn't, we're still together."

"Seperated huh." Alicia sighed "my friend Emily, she Seperated from her husband for four whole years. Can you imagine that? Four years."

Bethany nodded "yeah, they even moved apart, Emily stayed here in Carolina while Pedro, moved back to Portugal. They weren't even divorced yet and the relationship was already over."

"She's dating Lukas now, because she and Pedro finally got divorced, after four years of being apart. He came back with his new girlfriend, highly pregnant and told her he wants the divorce sorted." Alicia added.

Trevor nodded, not sure why they were telling him the story but he didn't want to be rude and chase them off. Once they finished their story he gave them a forced smile

"I'm sorry for your friend, I hope she's doing better now, and I wish her and Lukas all the best with their relationship. I have to get go-"

"Wait before you go, the last time you were here we invited you and Julia to the neighbourhood barbique and you guys couldn't make it. But now that you're back, and alone, how about we host one at your house this time?" Bethany asked with a smile.

Alicia placed her hand on his arm, a spark in her eyes "It would totally be fun, and we would be able to help you get your mind off your and Julia's seperation."

"Who's Julia?" came the voice from behind them.

Trevor turned and found Olivia standing there, a confused frown on her face "did you find the teething rings?"

She nodded "I did. Care to introduce me to your friends?"

Both women's smiles faded as soon as they saw her, and the doubler stroller she was pushing.

Bethany furrowed her eyebrows "you're Julia."

Olivia turned to Trevor "what? No I'm not."

Trevor sighed "I clearly should have spoken to you before we came out here, there's a few things you need to know."

"Clearly." she scoffed.

"We'll speak about this at home, we should get going by the way, they need to be fed." he said with a small smile.

Alicia frowned "how don't you know your own name?"

"I uhm..." she sighed.

It was obvious that something was going on and she knew that Trevor would explain it all to her eventually. She pursed her lips, deciding to play along.

"I had an accident recently, I was in a car crash and I'm still struggling with a ton of things." she explained.

Bethany frowned "what does that got to do with you know not knowing your name?"

"I have amnesia" she said with a sigh.

Trevor took hold of her hand and looked down at the twins, seeing that both of them had dosed off "we will explain everything eventually, but for now we really have to get going."

Olivia nodded "yeah these two need to be put down, it's nap time and I still have to prepare dinner."

He gave her a smile "babe you don't have to cook, I'll do it while you relax."

Bethany forced a smile "okay we will see you two around."

"I have an idea, Bethany and I are free tonight and Beth makes the best Chicken Stroganoff. That way neither of you will have to cook and then you'll be able to tell us the story of why you guys left." Alicia said with a smirk.

Bethany nodded "that is a great idea, I can come by and cook for you all. What do you say, Juls?"

She forced a smile "sure, sounds great. What time will you ladies be coming by?"

"Around five"

"Great, we'll see you then. It was lovely meeting you two" she said with another forced smile.

Trevor nodded "yeah we'll see you then."

"Bye" Bethany hollered as she watched the couple walk off, she turned to her sister with a smirk "that was quick thinking"

Alicia smirked "well those two are clearly hiding something. I don't buy the amnesia story."

"Neither do I." Bethany scoffed "but damn Mike got hotter since the last time we saw him."

"Julia gained weight" Alicia laughed.

Bethany scoffed "it's baby weight Lecia."

* * *

**_Well well well, look who's back._**

**_How are we feeling?_**

**_Leave your reviews and let me know. _**


	55. Chapter 55

**Burn.**

Olivia came downstairs after laying both babies down and taking a shower, she checked the time and let out a sigh "we have twenty minutes until those two come by."

Trevor sat down and grabbed his t-shirt, slipping it on "I know. I'm not looking forward to it."

"So who is Julia?" she asked while tying her hair up into a messy bun.

"That was your name when we were in witness protection, Julia and Michael." he said with a smirk "Julia was feisty"

She let out a laugh "are you trying to start shit with me?"

He raised an eyebrow at her "it depends, what happens if I am?"

She walked up to him and leaned down, a smile on her lips. She straddled him and leaned in, giving him a deep, sensual kiss.

Trevor's hands moved under her baggy jersey, resting on her waist. He kissed her back just as passionately, getting lost in the moment with her.

She let out a moan "Trev, baby we can't"

He broke their kiss gently "you started it"

"And I have every intention of finishing it once our guests leave and our babies are asleep. That includes the one growing inside of me" she teased.

"No fair. We both know that little one isn't going to sleep, because apparently my kids love cock blocking me" he pouted.

She threw her head back and let out a laugh "hey, in Noah and Maddy's defense you were noisy and woke them up. If you knew how to keep it down they would have slept right through the night."

"It's not my fault you're so fucking good. I just couldn't keep it to myself" he smirked.

She rolled her eyes "Charmer."

He gave her another kiss, this one more gentle than the previous one "I love you Olivia"

"I know you do" she broke their kiss, cupping his cheek "I know it might seem like I'm running from those three words but I want you to know that I'm not. I do have feelings for you, and it's not just the sex, but I'm not ready for those words right now."

"You don't need to explain it to me, I know that you're still piecing everything together and I don't expect you to say those words until you're ready. No pressure."

"Each day I see more and more of the reasoning behind me marrying you. You're an amazing guy and I'm glad I somehow managed to pin you down."

"I'm the lucky one, I got the Olivia Benson, to not only date me, but to marry me and have my kids. Do you have any idea how many people would want that?" he asked with a smile.

"I know of one" she scoffed "Elliot told me he still loves me..."

His smile slowly faded from his lips, as the realisation that he could possibly lose her set in.

"Do you love him?" he asked cautiously, fearing what her answer may be.

She sighed "I do... But I'm not going anywhere, because I married you for a reason and I intend on finding the reason and staying with you."

He swallowed the lump that arose in his throat and pursed his lips "I need to go check up on the kids."

She moved off his lap and watched him walk up the stairs with slumped shoulders and an unreadable look on his face. She sighed "great job Liv, you know exactly how to ruin a mood" she whispered once he disappeared from her line of sight.

Her eyes were burning with tears but she refused to let them fall, she snapped to reality when the door bell rang.

Taking a minute, she took a deep breath and steadied herself before going over to the door and forcing a smile at the two women. She allowed them in and led them to the kitchen, pouring each of them a glass of wine and a glass of juice for herself.

"So Julia, what brought you and Mike back to Carolina?" Alicia asked as she sat at the island.

Olivia shrugged "we're just here for two weeks, we needed a little break from the city life."

Bethany smirked "people usually say that when they have marital problems, you two running from someone?"

Trevor walked into the kitchen with Maddy and Noah in his arms, both little one's still looked exhausted "hey ladies" he said with a forced smile.

Olivia looked over at him and sighed "were these two awake up there?"

"Yeah they were relaxing in their cribs, but Maddy's getting a bit of a fever." he said while placing Noah in the baby swing.

Alicia looked over at the children and rolled her eyes when she saw their resemblance to their mother "your kids are really cute."

"Thanks Alicia, they get that part from their mother" Trevor pipped up with a sad smile on his lips.

Bethany, who had started cooking, looked over at the children and scowled "how old are they?"

"Just over a year old" he said with a wide smile.

Madison began whimpering when her father placed her in the swing and immediately started crying for her mother. Her little cheeks were red and puffy, her teething making her sick and moodier than usual.

Olivia walked over and took her, holding her close and rocking her gently "shh, momma's right here"

Trevor sat back and watched as their daughter latched onto her mother for dear life and let out loud wails. A look of pain covering her little face, her tiny features looking slightly swollen.

"You need to calm down for me, princess" Olivia said while gently rocking her, holding her close until her cries subsided.

"Does she always get like this?" Alicia asked.

Trevor shrugged "sometimes. If they're really tired they'll throw tantrums and scream their little lungs out, or if they're sick or teething."

She shook her head, taking a gulp of her wine "I don't think I would be able to handle it."

Olivia held the now calm toddler and let out a breath "having children is no easy feat, but it is rewarding. Everyday I wake up and I see these two or hear their laughter, I just feel so blessed instantly because I know that these two are proof of the love we share."

Trevor looked over at her and scoffed "used to share" he whispered.

Olivia caught wind of his words and frowned "are you really going to do this now? You're going to bring that up now, while we have guests?"

He shrugged "hey you had no problem admitting it"

She scoffed "because I wanted us to be honest with one another. I could have been a bitch and lied to you, but I didn't want to do that, I wanted us to trust one another and be open."

"Well I guess that was a little too open for my liking." he scowled.

She shook her head "you're being a dick, and I'm not sure if it's because you're scared or jealous or whatever the hell it may be." she pursed her lips "these last weeks have been amazing, it's been a dream, finally being with a man who isn't a jackass. But right now, right now, you seem as judgemental as every other man out there."

"What's that supposed to mean?" he frowned.

Both of them had forgotten that they had guests as they stared each other down.

"It means you're being an asshole, just like every other guy out there. I fucking knew this was too good to be true" she spat.

He scoffed "that coming from the one who might return to New York in two weeks and fuck her ex partner because she still loves him."

She pulled back at his words, an instant look of disgust clouding her features "is that what you think of me? After all this time, you really think that I would sleep with Elliot? A married man, while I myself am married. Is that all you see when you look at me? A whore, who falls in bed with any man that says he loves her?"

He sighed, seeing her eyes glisten with tears, it wasn't his intention to hurt her. He was just so angry and somewhat jealous that she could openly admit to loving Elliot but not him.

"Liv, babe" he sighed "I didn't mean that and you know it."

"No I don't know it. I don't know half of what is going on in my life right now. What I do know is that this trip was a mistake, coming here with you was a mistake. I have never felt cheaper in my life, you did that and I hope you're happy. You made me feel like a cheap whore, in front of our children and these women that I don't even really know. I'm leaving and I'm taking my kids with me." she said before storming out of the kitchen.

Trevor let out a breath he didn't even realise he was holding, his eyes instantly filling with tears at just the thought of how much he hurt her. He ran his hand over his face and looked over at Noah who was still in the swing half asleep.

Bethany and Alicia didn't dare to say a word, both of them were too stunned to speak. They always saw the pair as a polished couple and now both of them got to see them falling apart. It was strangely satisfying for both women because they realised that maybe they could meddle their way in.

Noah started moaning after a minute or two of silence, letting out soft whimpers for his mother.

Trevor scooped him up and sighed "daddy really messed up this time kiddo."

Noah looked up at his father and let out a cry "I want momma"

"I know." he said before walking out of the kitchen with a pained look on his face.

Olivia wiped her tears when she heard footsteps coming toward the bedroom door, she tried to compose herself because she did not want to show him any sign of weakness.

He knocked on the door before going into the bedroom and just standing there, silently staring at her beautiful face and wishing he could take his words back. It was too late for that now, and he knew it.

"Noah was crying for you" he started.

She rocked Madison and sighed "will you take her? I can't comfort both babies at the same time."

She sounded so cold and distant, it killed him because he knew it was his fault. He took hold of the little girl and watched as Olivia comforted their son, holding him close.

"I'm sorry" he sat down on the edge of the bed and shook his head "Liv I'm so sorry, I didn't mean any of the things I said down there. I was hurt and jealous, and I realise that gave me no right to be a dick to you. I'm so sorry" he whispered, his eyes burning with tears.

She paced the room with Noah in her arms, a frown on her face "I remembered something... We were going to get a divorce, you were talking about having joint custody of the twins." she closed her eyes, her tears making their decent at just the thought of not having the children with her 24/7.

He sighed "I didn't mean it, I was scared that you were going to abort our baby. I thought saying all of those things would make you realise that abortion would tear us apart. We lost one baby before, I couldn't handle the thought of losing another."

She frowned "what are you talking about?"

"You can't remember this but before we got married you fell pregnant, you were three months along when we found out." he let out a heavy breath, getting choked up at the memory "it was an ectopic pregnancy and you had to have the embryo surgically removed. It was one of the most painful experiences for both of us, we then made the promise to each other that no matter what, we would always do what's best for our children." he explained.

She sat down beside him, a look of shock and sadness clouding her features "I lost a baby..." a few tears escaped her eyes "what happened to this amazing, fairytale life you told me about?"

He shrugged "our amazing life had a few ups and downs. We're still working on a lot of things and I know that I really hurt you tonight but I do hope that you would be able to forgive me for it. I didn't mean those things, I don't think of you as a whore or any of those other things."

"You're my wife and I love you... I know that you won't ever do anything with Elliot because you proved that even before we got married. You had a choice between me and him, and you came to me at that lake, you chose me."

"I would do it again." she whispered "I would choose you again, every time."

He took her hand and kissed the back of it "I'm sorry for making your first day here a bad one. I'm sorry for making you feel cheap, because you are not that, you're worth more than I could put into words. I'm also sorry that I snapped out like that in front of our guests, it was not the time nor the place for me to voice my insecurities."

"Oh shit, we have guests!" she said, having forgotten all about the two women in their kitchen.

She jumped up and walked to the door "we can finish this conversation later."

* * *

**_Reviews are always nice._**

**_I know you all have a lot of questions and I promise they will be answered as we go along._**


	56. Chapter 56

**Painful Memories****.**

Trevor and Olivia made their way downstairs and apologised to both women for their outbursts, they then proceeded to explain what really happened to both of them.

Bethany and Alicia were stunned into silence, neither of them had thought about the possibility of the couple being under witness protection. It made total sense though, because they just disappeared so suddenly and there was no trace of them on social media.

They ate the rest of their dinner with peaceful conversations and listening to Maddy and Noah's babbling.

Alicia looked over at Olivia "Ju- Olivia..." she caught herself "I don't mean to pry but are you pregnant?"

A massive smile spread on her lips "I am"

Bethany forced a smile "congratulations, how far along are you?"

"Last week we hit the five month mark." she said before feeding Noah a forkful of food.

Madison stood up against her father's legs, shifting between eating and dancing. She let out loud sounds and laughed when her father told her to be quiet.

Trevor looked down at her and cupped her cheek "you can't dance and eat at the same time princess."

She pursed her lips, before giving her father a massive smile "up up"

He picked her up and let out a laugh when she cupped his cheeks and pressed a kiss to his lips.

Olivia poked her, a playful smile on her lips "ey, that's my husband you're kissing."

Madison looked over at her mother and smirked before kissing her father again "me dadda"

She let out a laugh "Noah do you think it's fair that sissy just stole my husband?"

He shook his head "no, no, no."

"Stop making your mother jealous" Trevor teased, pressing a kiss to his daughter's forehead.

Olivia shook her head "honey I could never be jealous of our daughter"

"What's it like having kids?" Alicia asked.

Trevor sat back with Madison in his arms, she had now taken to chewing mercilessly on her new teething ring "it's amazing, I love these two more and more with each passing day and I can't wait to meet this little one."

"Are you scared?" Bethany asked, "to give birth... You're going to push an entire human out of your va-"

"Yes I am." she cut her off, "I am terrified, but I've done it before and I survived so I know that I'll make it through this one too."

"Do you know what it is?"

He shook his head "no we don't. We find out when we get back to New York."

"What about you? How has life been treating you two?" Olivia asked.

Bethany shrugged "I'm okay, I started my own jewellery business a few months after you two left. Alicia is my business partner."

"That's great, so I take it business is going good" she said with a smile.

Alicia nodded "yeah it is. We are currently working on a massive opening for one of our other stores in the neighbourhood."

"You two should come by, that way we'll get to show you all the collections" Bethany said with a wide grin.

Trevor shrugged "sounds fun, I'm sure we could stop by."

Olivia looked down at Noah and pursed her lips "we would have to take the twins with us, would that be okay with you two?"

"Yes as long as they don't knock anything over" she responded with a laugh.

Olivia pursed her lips "that's an unlikely case."

Trevor pressed a kiss to the side of her head "we will figure something out."

Alicia raised a brow at Olivia "if you're up for it we could go get mani's tomorrow, that way we can get to know each other better and you'll have a break from parenting for an hour or two."

"I uhm" she sighed. "I'll let you know."

"okay then, we will be looking forward to your call. We have to get going though, we still have a few final plans to make." Bethany said with a forced smile.

Olivia nodded, getting up to walk them to the door. She had Noah on her waist and waved as both women walked out of the doorway and down the street to their home.

Trevor closed the door and turned to his wife "How are you feeling?"

"I don't know." she shrugged "will you be okay with the kids tomorrow?"

"Yeah, as long as you pump before you leave, I'll be okay."

She nodded "okay, then let's get these two ready for bed, because I believe you have some making up to do."

He smirked, before locking the doors "you three head up, I'll clean up down here."

"Don't be too long" she said with a smile before carrying both little ones to the main bedroom.

She walked into the en suite and filled the tub, before placing both little ones in the bubbly water. She laughed lightly when both little one's squealed while playing with the bubbles that rested on the water.

"is pwetty" Madison said with a smile.

"Just like you, princess" she smiled, kissing her daughter's forehead.

"And me" Noah pipped up with a laugh.

Olivia laughed, before kissing her son as well "yes honey, you're pwetty too."

...

Olivia settled into their bed after checking up on the twins, she raised an eyebrow at Trevor when he walked out of the shower with nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist.

She bit her lip and tried not to get too caught up when she saw the little droplets of water rolling down his torso and soaking into the towel that hid his manhood from her. Her eyes focused on his body, he had the perfect body, enough muscles to fill out a muscle top but not too much.

He bent down to take his sweatpants out of the drawers, unaware that his wife was eyeing him and admiring his body.

She watched his muscles flex as he reached for the sweatpants and suddenly all she wanted was to feel his skin on hers. Her hormones were getting stronger and seeing him like this made her forget all about their argument. She shrugged, deciding to satisfy her craving before sorting out their previous squabble.

Trevor stopped what he was doing when he felt his wife run her nails up his back, he instantly straightened up. He felt her arms wrap around his waist from behind while she pressed soft kisses to the exposed skin of his back.

Her hands caressed his skin "you won't be needing your sweatpants right now"

He turned to her and noticed the look of arousal on her face, knowing that she needed a release before anything else. So he gave in without a second of doubt and crashed his lips onto hers in a hungry kiss that left her gasping for air.

Her legs wrapped around his waist and he picked her up and pinned her up against wall. He trailed his kisses from her lips to her neck, focusing on the spot that drove her crazy.

She let out a moan and threw her head back, gasping when she felt his hand moving under her baggy t-shirt. She yelped when he ripped her thin lace panties off her, allowing her to feel the sting of it.

He wasted no time, pushing two fingers into her wet heat and groaned into her neck when he felt how ready she was for him.

She whimpered "Trevor, please... I need you."

A smile spread on his lips and he removed his fingers, aligning his aroused member with her her entrance. He pressed his lips to hers before pushing the tip of his erection into her. He pulled back and pushed deeper this time, allowing her to take in more of him.

She was so tight around him that just pushing in felt sensational. Soft moans fell from her lips as he worked his way into her, filling her slowly with every inch of him.

Once his entire length was inside of her, he started rolling his hips slowly, his lips still attacking hers, drowning out her moans.

Olivia dug her nails into his back, lifting her legs a little more so that he could go deeper. She groaned when he began thrusting deeper, his strong and steady movements making her weak in the knees.

She knew this was not going to be a quick fuck, he was going to take his time and savour every second of being encased by her. His lips never trailed too far from hers and even her baggy t-shirt wasn't a factor. Because right now all that matter was having her around him, just like this.

He moaned when he felt her walls tightening around him, his thrust speeding up a bit because he knew she needed more.

A loud gasp left her lips when his thumb brushed over her little bundle of nerves, she was so close and he knew it. He started moving faster, hitting her g-spot with every thrust and pulling all the way out before slamming back into her.

Her eyes were squeezed shut and her jaw dropped, tears flooded down her cheeks as she came undone in his arms, her inner walls convulsing around him.

He felt her tears dropping onto his shoulders and held back him own release, immediately worried that he may have hurt her. He stopped moving his hips and gently pulled out of her, moving her to their bed and laying down with her in his arms.

Her sobs racked her body as she held onto him, her face in the crook of his neck and hands holding him close. He was confused but continued to comfort her, rubbing her back and kissing her head until her cries subsided.

She calmed down eventually, her eyes red and puffy and her nose all clogged up from crying. She sniffed, cuddling impossibly closer to him and placing her hand on her little bump.

Trevor gently pushed her hair out of her face and cupped her cheeks, pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead. His erection was long gone and now his only worry was making sure that she was okay and that he didn't hurt her.

"Liv, what's wrong?" he asked gently.

She looked up at him and sniffed "you didn't hurt me..."

"Okay, that's good. But why are you crying? Did you remember something?" she nodded, tucking her head back into the nape of his neck.

His hands gently caressed the tiny swell at her midsection, running over her stretched skin in a way he knew was comforting to her.

She cleared her throat "I remembered..."

He kissed her forehead gently, pulling the blankets around them "take your time beautiful, there is no rush okay. I'm here and I'm listening."

She shook her head "I can't tell you, because you're going to hate me."

"I could never hate you Olivia." he said sternly "I love you with my whole heart, this love is too deep, it could never turn to hate. You're the woman of my dreams and I am willing to get over and through everything if it means I still get to have you by my side."

She looked up at him, her tears still flowing down her cheeks, a heart broken look on her face as she searched his eyes for any sign of dishonesty.

"I love you Olivia Langan, I promised you that we would stay together regardless of what life throws our way. I promise you today, that what you say will not change how much I love you, even if you decide right now that you don't want our baby..." he swallowed the lump that arose in his throat "I would be willing to stay with you, and pick up the pieces, help you through it and still love you. Because I love you, all of you, fears and flaws are part of the package."

She nodded, pressing a gentle kiss to his lips, she pulled away after a short while and wiped her tears "you say that now, but when you realise what I am, what a monster I truly am then you're going to leave and you're going to take our kids with you."

He held her close and shook his head, his own tears flowing now "that's not true babe. You're not a monster and I am not going anywhere, I don't care what you say."

"Trevor I remember telling Alex and Kathy that I was going to abort our baby, I really wanted to do it." she let out a sob "when I left to visit Alex, I was actually on my way to an abortion clinic... The accident stopped me from making the biggest mistake of my life."

He swallowed loudly, tears dropping from his eyes at her admission, she was going to kill their baby and he wouldn't have known until she got back home. He was shocked and angry, but he refused to let it get the best of him, especially since he just promised her that he would love her no matter what she said.

He wrapped his arms around her and pinned her down gently, his tears falling as he pressed a deep kiss to her lips. He had to feel her and let her feel that he still loved her, he was willing to look past the mistake she almost made.

She moaned into the kiss and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, tasting his salty tears on his lips "Trev..." she whispered.

He broke their kiss, looking down at her with a bitter sweet smile on his lips "I still love you Liv, all that matters is that you're here now and you want to keep the baby."

"I do want to keep it." she whispered back "I love this baby so much, I can't wait to hold him or her. Trevor I'm so sorry for the decisions I made before, for almost aborting our baby without your permission or knowledge. I won't do it, because I love this baby, and you." she wiped his tears "I love you Trevor, so much it hurts."

* * *

**_Phew. Well that was a bit of a roller-coaster right there but it's up, and I threw in the tiniest bit of smut to soften the blow a bit. _**

**_Let me know what you think about this little revelation._**

**_I know you all have a lot of questions and I assure you that they will be answered. There's method to my madness._**

**_Anywho, leave a review and I'll try to update as soon as possible. _**


	57. Chapter 57

**New Traditions.**

Trevor stood in the kitchen, taking the finished waffles out of the press, throwing more fresh batter in it to make yet another golden and crispy waffle. He was clad in nothing but a sweatpants that hung low on his hips, his upper body exposed because he was in no mood for a t-shirt.

Olivia lay in their bedroom, completely naked and sound asleep after the intense night they had. After her admission of love, they made love a number of times, both of them losing count of the amount of releases they had. When the early hours came rolling in she was spent and was lulled to sleep by the gentle beating of Trevor's heartbeat as her head rested on his chest. Her arms were wrapped around him in a possessive manner and his hands had rested against the little bump that graced her midsection.

The morning he awoke first, slipping out of bed and doing everything in his power not to wake her up when his arousal nearly got the best of him. It took every bit of restraint within him to tear his body away from her and take a shower to help with the raging hard on he had as a result of having her naked body pressed against him.

After his shower he slipped into a fresh pair of sweats, allowing his wife to get some much needed rest after the hectic night she had. He checked on the twins, surprised to see that both tots were cuddled up and asleep in their cribs. Their little eyes were pressed shut and their noses would scrunch every now and again, just like their mothers.

He decided to prepare some waffles, knowing that she loved those whenever she was pregnant. It was her go-to breakfast, especially when she needed cheering up. Trevor know that when she eventually woke up, she would remember her episode and her admission. He knew very well that her guilt would start eating at her and he so badly wanted to do everything in his power to prevent that from happening. So he decided that their morning was going to be stress free for her, filled with breakfast and much needed family time.

His mind drifted back to the previous evening, her words ringing in his head, it hurt to hear her say that she was actually on her way to get an abortion, but he was glad she told him. He didn't deny that he was shocked and hurt by what she almost did, but he didn't hate her for it. He meant it when he told her that he loves her regardless of their mistakes. She was his wife and he loved her so endlessly, he couldn't find a part of himself that didn't love her. Everything about her was perfect, even her flaws, he loved it all, all of her was just right, just enough for him.

Olivia stirred under the sunlight that came pouring into the room through the thin curtains, she reached over and sighed when her hands landed on the cold blankets beside her. Letting her know that her husband had been out of bed for quite some time.

Her mind immediately started running wild with thoughts of losing him, or him being disgusted by her. She knew he was hurt, she didn't blame him, she was disgusted by herself when the memory came flooding back. It was then that Olivia realised that maybe this dream life she had built with this man and their kids, wasn't all that perfect. She was a tainted soul, she knew this, she had been hurt beyond relief in her lifetime and she still had the scars to show it. She had been tortured, beaten and abused by different people through different periods of her life. She had faced the devil himself and somehow managed to come out alive, but not untouched, she had needed therapy to deal with it and even that didn't completely erase her fears.

She snapped out of her reverie when the bedroom door opened, her husband walking in with a smile and a tray with their food on it. She forced a smile, her guilt and curiosity eating at her from inside, but she didn't want to talk about her issues right now.

Trevor pressed a kiss to her forhead and sat down beside her with a sweet smile on his lips "morning beautiful, how'd you sleep?"

She shrugged "morning... I slept okay, you?"

"Great, I made us some waffles, I know how you loved these when you were pregnant with the twins." he placed the tray down between them.

"Thank you, you didn't have to do all this" she forced another smile.

He shrugged "It's nothing much, you deserve a morning in to just relax."

"What about you? What about the things you deserve?" she asked softly.

He turned to her "I've got everything I need and deserve right here."

"Is it good enough though?" she asked, voicing her doubts.

He furrowed his eyebrows "what are you talking about woman, you are everything I have ever needed and wanted. Olivia you are more than enough for me."

"I'm not all that great... I've got scars and issues that I can't talk about, I have all of these issues, why would you want someone as damaged as me?"

"Because I love you" he shrugged "its that simple, I love you. With your scars and issues, I love you with everything in me and that's enough."

"Is it though?" she asked, looking up at him with tear filled eyes.

He cupped her cheek and pressed a kiss to her forehead "Hey I know you have a lot going on in your head right now. But I can assure you that I don't love you any less, I forgive you Liv, you need to forgive yourself too. So that we can move forward and be happy again."

She looked down at their hands which were clasped together and bit back a sob "thank you, for being an amazing man. I have no idea what I've done to deserve you, or how I could've gotten this lucky. I love you."

"I love you too, now eat, because we've got to take care of those little ones as soon as they wake up. Plus you've got a girls day to get ready for."

She let out a sigh "don't remind me."

He let out a laugh "can I kiss you?"

She felt her cheeks flush, and nodded, not saying a word as she pressed her lips to his. She let out the softest breath as she allowed his mouth to mould against hers, his tongue slipping past her lips and into her mouth. He explored her mouth as if it was new territory, his hand moving to caress her cheek, while the other was slowly trailing up her thigh.

Olivia let out a frustrated groan when she heard a whimper coming from the other room, she eased out of their kiss reluctantly. A sigh leaving her lips when she realised their moment of intimacy was not going any further than a kiss.

"I will go get those two, you eat" Trevor said, pressing another kiss to her lips before making his way out of the room.

She got up and grabbed one of his tee's and a some fresh underwear and slipped into it before settling back down and digging into the waffles Trevor prepared. She let out a moan, the glorious taste of waffles and ice cream filled her instantly. It was no surprise to her that this was a hit when she was pregnant with the twins, because it tasted like heaven. A massive smile graced her lips as the memory of the first morning they shared waffles and ice cream came back to her.

_"Liv, it's just waffles you don't have to moan" Trevor teased as he fed her some another piece of the ice cream covered waffle._

_She allowed him to feed her and let out another moan "I know, but it tastes so good. I could really get used to this"_

_He chuckled "me too. I could get used to having breakfast with you everyday just like this, you sitting on me while I feed you. It's perfect.__"_

_"__You're perfect" she pressed a kiss to his lips, her arms moving to wrap around his shoulders.__He placed the plate of waffles down beside them, wrapping his arms around her waist and deepening their kiss. He nipped at her lip, his hand squeezing her ass._

_She groaned into his mouth "honey, we have to eat."_

_"I could eat right now" he smirked, picking her up and carrying her over to the kitchen counter._

_A gasp left her lips when he placed her down and began kissing his way down her body, his lips leaving a trail of fire with every inch of her that they touched. She let out a shaky breath when he spread her legs, kneeling down so that his face was in line with her core._

_He tugged at the button down shirt she wore and smirked when the buttons went flying everywhere. A preditory look covered his features when he saw the lace underwear she wore, she looked gorgeous to him._

_She sat completely exposed to him, the big shirt she wore now hung open, her breast open for him to see. They were more rounded now, they were fuller than usual and he loved it, a slight bump stood out at her midsection, housing their baby. She was four months pregnant and five months married, these were the happiest months of her life. _

_A_ _loud gasp tore from her when Trevor pulled her hips forward a bit and dragged his tongue over her still covered mound. He groaned at the taste of her, the slinky underwear was doing nothing to hide her most intimate parts from him. He could taste her through her panties and the heat that radiated off her core was the most intoxicating thing he had ever experienced. He licked at her heat a few more times before removing her panties and shoving them into his pocket, he then pressed a kiss to her now naked womanhood. _

_Olivia threw her head back "Trev, stop teasing._

_"__Trevor smirked "patience love"_

_His finger trailed up and down her slit slowly, ensuring that she was ready before slipping two fingers into her. She let out a strangled moan when his fingers stretched her, her hand flying down, her fingers tangling into his hair. _

"Say hi to momma" Trevor said as he placed both little one's on the bed beside their mother.

Olivia snapped out of her reverie and bit her lip, her eyes glazed over with arousal as she looked up at Trevor.

Noah laid his head on his mother's leg, a tired sigh escaping his lips "momma sleep?"

She shook her head and let out a laugh "no baby we're not going back to sleep. You have to get up"

Madison simply crawled into her fathers arms and groaned, both little ones were grumpy and it was clear for their parents to see.

Trevor raised an eyebrow at his wife "Liv are you okay? You look a little flushed"

She let out a soft chuckle at the concerned look on his face and shrugged "I just remembered the first time we had breakfast together like this... I was pregnant and extremely hormonal."

"Yeah and I could not keep my hands off you" he laughed, thinking back to that morning.

They made love three times before finally finishing their breakfast and neither of them complained about the ice cream that had already melted. They didn't mind at all, because they were both satisfied.

She saw the look of arousal that washed over his face and let out a hearty laugh, shaking her head "Hey don't get any ideas, the kids are awake and they might be peaceful now but they will become noisy soon."

He looked down at the little girl resting in his arms and smirked "I don't mind it though, this is a new stage in life for us. Now instead of having hot sex and then breakfast, we have breakfast with our kids. Just having them here with me is enough to make me happy, then you're here too and I feel like the luckiest man alive."

"I'm the lucky one. I don't know how it happened, but somehow you fell in love with me, regardless of my past and my scars. I don't know how it happened or why, but I'm glad it did, because if we didn't end up here, in witness protection, I would not have had these two in my life." she leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to his lips "I love you."

He cupped her cheek "I love you too."

They stayed that way for a little longer, only breaking apart when the twins began complaining about being hungry. Both of them laughed at how both little ones began complaining at the same time, both of them with pouted lips and puppy eyes which they definitely got from their mother.

This was their new normal, this was their new tradition, having breakfast with their kids before rushing off to get their plans for the day sorted. It would all change soon though, with a new baby on the way, Trevor knew it was going to become hectic. He just feared that it would all become too much and that she would leave him in the end because of how overwhelming this all was.

* * *

_**So**** I snuck the tiniest bit of smut in there, but of course we didn't get to go into full blown details because Olivia has babies to attend to.**_

**_Anywho, her memory will be coming back soon, in the next few chapters and a few explanations to questions you have will come along with it._**

**_Don't forget to leave a review and let me know what your thoughts are on this little chapter. _**


	58. Chapter 58

**It's All Coming Back.**

Olivia looked over at Alicia who had just gotten her nails done and raised a brow at her "so why couldn't Bethany make it?"

Alicia shrugged nervously "she uhm... There was some last minute planning that needed to be done for the opening and she is sorting it."

"Well if you guys were busy, we could have just cancelled and planned for another day before Trevor and I leave for home again" she said with shrug.

"I needed to get my nails done and I haven't had a relaxing day in a while, so I figured if Beth could sort the rest of the event planning out I could get some time to breathe. Plus you've got two toddlers at home and a third one on the way, you must be exhausted."

She nodded "I am... It is exhausting. I have no idea where the twins get that much energy from, there are days where I feel like crying because they're so hyper and all over the place."

"atleast Trevor is good with them, so you don't have to do everything on your own." she shrugged "I had a friend who had triplets and then fell pregnant again when they turned a year old, then her husband left her after she had the baby. Her place was chaos because she had three one year olds and a new born screaming their heads off and fighting for her attention."

"I don't think I'd be able to survive that, hell I don't know how I'm going to survive when this little one gets here, but I am excited." she ran her free hand over her bump "I just worry that I won't know what to do, that I'll have the baby and then be a horrible mother."

"I'm sure you won't, they say that those types of things comes naturally, the motherly instincts that is." she smiled.

"Well from what I know about the twins, I do think we would be okay. Hopefully this kid isn't too noisy and moody, because the twins are already fussy."

Alicia furrowed her brow "whenever I saw them they were well behaved."

"Don't get me wrong they are good kids, it's just that they get extremely moody when they're tired or hungry, or any other time they feel like it." she laughed "but they are cutest little people I have ever met."

"They are, they're the perfect mix of you and Trevor... You two are good together."

"Yeah I just wish I could remember our relationship... Or everything about it. Were we ever close?" she asked almost nervously.

Alicia pursed her lips "not really. We didn't know much about you two, we knew you as Mike and Julia, the couple who had been married for years and had no kids. Bethany thought that you disliked us because one morning she asked you about your sex life and you were pissed at her. After that we tried to get to know you better, but you two just disappeared and the house has been empty ever since." she explained.

Olivia frowned "well I have always been private about my sex life so I can understand why being questioned about it would piss me off."

"Yeah Beth really beat herself up over it for months. Then when we saw Trevor alone in the store the other day we figured that you two had split up because you never really looked happy together. Seeing you now though, it's clear that you're in a good space, even though you were arguing."

"I'm sorry you two had to see that. It's been a bit hectic recently, with me being pregnant and having amnesia." she sighed "I just wish it would all come back already. It's exhausting trying to pin the years together when you only have bits of memories that come around in the most random moments."

"What's it like when the memories come back? Like how does it happen?"

"Some days things just feel familiar and it's like a light bulb moment, where I'll be doing the dishes and my mind will take me back to the time I did that a year ago and how I was laughing in the kitchen with Trevor. Or I'll run my hand over my bump and have the fastest flashback moment to when I first did that with the twins." she smiled "I'm just frustrated with not knowing everything."

...

Trevor sighed as he paced the room with Noah in his arms, Madison was crawling about and playing with her toys while Noah was screaming his head off because he was teething. His cheeks were a deep shade of red and his eyes were swollen because of crying.

He gently rocked the little boy, trying his best to calm him down because he did want to have to call Olivia. She was supposed to relax for the day, he refused to call her and disturb her simply because he couldn't get Noah to calm down.

Noah held onto his father and sobbed loudly, his little face scrunched up.

"momma" he cried out, demanding the presence of his mother for what felt like the millionth time.

"Noah, momma will be home soon, just calm down for me okay?" he asked gently holding his son close.

He sniffled "I go momma"

"I know you want your mom, she's just a bit busy right now. How about we call her, will you stop crying then champ?" he tried, hoping that hearing her voice would calm their little boy down.

"want momma" he sobbed, not caring much for what his father had to say.

Trevor sighed and sat down, he took his phone out of his pocket and dialed Olivia's number, hating that he had to disturb her but he needed Noah to calm down and nothing was working at this point.

Madison watched her father before crawling over to him, tugging at his pants to be picked up "dadda."

He leaned down and carefully picked her up, securing her beside him on the sofa while Noah sat on his lap in tears. He listened as Olivia's phone rang for a minute before her smooth voice came through the speaker.

"Hey honey, how are the kids?" she asked instantly.

He let out a sigh "Maddy is good, Noah is extremely moody. I just called cause he's been crying for you and I have no idea how to calm him down right now."

"Aww he's been moody because he's teething again, you know how he gets." she said with a soft laugh "Hey baby boy."

"Momma" Noah cried out, confused as to why he could hear her and not see her.

"Hey there little guy, I miss you and your sister so much you won't even believe it. I'll be home real soon okay, I just finished up here and we'll drive in the next five minutes, so for now I need you to calm down for me okay?" she asked softly, knowing that he needed to hear her.

Ever since the accident both babies had a bit of separation issues, even at night, it had become impossible to leave them in their room to dose off. They would not fall asleep while their mother was not close by, both of them used her voice as a way of calming down. After not hearing her for weeks or being held by her, they now wanted nothing more than to be with their mother. Madison would crawl over to her and just lay in her arms most mornings and Noah would follow suit.

Trevor noticed how much the accident had changed both toddlers, it was very clear that the separation from their mother had traumatised them somewhat. She was in hospital for weeks and even when she recovered they never got to spend as much time with her as before. Now they were both super clingy, becoming moody if they didn't see their mother before bedtime or in the morning when they woke up.

Noah sniffled, his cries subsiding somewhat at the sound of his mother's voice "I go momma?"

"yes, you'll get to come to me. I'm on my way home baby, so I need you to stop crying and be good for you dad okay?"

"otay momma" he nodded.

Trevor let out a soft laugh "I have no idea how you do that, how you get them to understand what you're saying, and how your voice calms them."

"I have no idea either" she said with a laugh "but I have to go now, I'll be home soon."

"Okay, see you soon. I'm sorry that I had to call you for this. I love you."

"I love you too honey." she said with a laugh, running her hand over her tiny bump "I really do."

...

Olivia arrived at home after twenty minutes and found Trevor looking exhausted, Madison was playing with her toys on the ground while Trevor was rocking Noah to calm him down. She placed her things down and leaned down, pressing a massive kiss to both of Madison's cheeks before moving over to take hold of Noah.

She held him close and pressed a kiss to the side of his head, a smile on her lips when he cuddled into her arms "did you miss me sweet boy?"

He nodded gently "uh huh"

"I missed you too baby, I missed you, Maddy and your dad so much." she gently rocked him.

Trevor picked Madison up before leaning in and pressing a kiss to Olivia's forehead, he lingered on her skin for a moment before moving away.

She stopped him and gave him a warm smile "kiss me."

He let out a laugh at her request, she was never one to demand affection, unless she was turned on. He leaned down, his nose brushing against hers while his lips ghosted over hers, heat rising between them instantly.

She let out a breathe, not sure how he could have this affect on her, they were barely touching and she was already going insane for more of him. When the wait for him to close the space between them became too much for her, she finally caved and claimed his lips with her own. Her mouth crashed against his in a release of pent up passion and lust, a soft moan leaving her lips and disappearing in his mouth.

Trevor was surprised by her sudden possessive behaviour but he definitely was not complaining, not when she took charge like this. Her lips moved over his in a claiming way, her tongue exploring his mouth as if was scouting out her favourite spots to mark them. He wanted nothing more than to drag her upstairs and allow her to take control in many other ways.

Olivia eased out of their heated kiss, pressing a few soft pecks to his now kiss-bruised lips "I missed you today."

"I missed you too" he said with a laugh, feeling his body react to her.

She bit her lip "we need to talk when these two take their afternoon nap... I remembered a few things"

"What is it?" he asked.

"Us. I remember our wedding, our first kiss. Our first date" she teared up "Trevor I know how we fell in love and I think I am more in love with you now than before. Because I was speaking to Alicia about you and how amazing you and suddenly the memories of how perfect you are to me came back." she sniffed, wiping her tears with her free hand "it came back. I had given up hope and I thought that I would be stuck like this forever, stuck with two years missing from my life."

Trevor had tears pouring down his cheeks as he listened to her, relief flooding his body, because he too was starting to fear that she would never remember them. He was so happy, it felt as if everything had done a massive shift and now it was all falling back into place. He finally had his wife back, and she didn't hate him, she was happy to see him, she loved him.

"Liv, baby that's amazing! Why didn't you tell me when I called?"

"I wanted to tell you face to face so that I could assure you that I don't hate you, I don't want to lose you or our baby. I remember it, I remember our conversation the morning of the accident. I remember the pregnancy, both of them and I want to experience this one with you too, and I know that we both said some stupid things but I don't want us to end this." she bit her lip "I love you Trevor Langan, regardless of the fights and arguments. I don't want a divorce or joint custody with the kids. I just want you and our babies, all of them."

He cupped her cheek, wiping her tears, before leaning in and placing another kiss to her lips. He was amazed, shocked and confused. None of it made sense but he was not going to fight it, he was going to enjoy this moment. Because this was the very first time he had the woman he loved back, she remembered him, them and she was not willing to let them go. He was happy, happier than ever before.

* * *

**_Hey readers._**

**_Firstly I am sorry for the delay with this update, I have been super busy with work and a few other things so it took me forever to finish it off._**

**_I know you still have questions, and I assure you that answers are coming... So let me know what you all thought about this, it is just a little filler Chapter._**


	59. Chapter 59

**Loving You.**

Trevor helped Olivia put the twins down for an afternoon nap, both of them happy that the little ones went down without a fight. They watched their babies sleep for a few short minutes, admiring their beauty.

Olivia followed Trevor out of the room and smirked "I never thought we'd end up together... When we moved to Carolina I was too scared to even speak to you because I thought you would be an asshole. I'm glad this all happened though."

He took hold of her hand "honey I'm glad it happened too... I'd get shot again if meant we would end up like this"

She let out a laugh, shaking her head while leading him into their bedroom, she stepped closer to him, her face close to his "Trev you never have to do anything to get me, I'm all yours already baby"

She closed the space between their lips, her arms moving to wrap around his shoulders. She backed him up until they were up against the foot of the bed and pushed him back after breaking their kiss. She smiled down at him while undoing the buttons on her blouse, his eyes focused on her breast that was getting fuller with each day. She had the tiniest bump at her stomach and he found it more attractive than her having a flat stomach, he always thought she looked gorgeous but her being pregnant always added to that.

His eyes drank her in, as she slipped out of the blouse, now standing in her bra, she watched him scoot up the bed before crawling toward him. There was nothing sexier than having him undress her, she wanted his hands on her skin more than anything.

He could see that she wanted to be touched and he did not need to be asked, he reached for her, gently pinning her down beneath him. He pressed his lips to her neck, kissing at the spot he knew drove her insane while his hands worked on undoing her bra. She arched her back, her fingers fumbling with the hem of his shirt, trying to tug it off.

She groaned when he moved away from her skin so that she could remove the sweater, it came off within seconds and her hands staring to run up his now exposed skin.

Within seconds they were both naked and making love, their body's rocking in rhythm with one another. Trevor's hands gripped her hips as he ground into her in a steady rhythm. One of her hands were tangled in his hair while the other was dragged up and down his back in a steady motion, her nails digging into his skin whenever he hit a sensitive spot.

The only sounds that was heard was their moans and groans and the sound of skin slapping together. They were in their own little bubble, enjoying each other's bodies. This was the first time in months that they made love like this, so passionately, with so much need.

It was as if no one else existed or mattered as they continued their tender love making, both of them eagerly awaiting the spectacular end they knew they would reach anytime soon. Trevor's lips were firmly attached to Olivia's neck and his fingers trailing up her body, to her sensitive breasts.

She gasped and threw her head back in the thrills of passion. She bit her lip to hold back the scream that threatened to rip out of her throat.

Trevor pressed his lips to hers to muffle the scream he knew she was about to let out. Swallowing her screams with his kiss as they both came undone.

She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and let out a heavy breath "I love you"

"I love you too Liv. I'm so happy that you got your memory back" he pressed a kiss to the side of her head, "I thought you we would be stuck like this forever. I thought you would get sick of trying to remember me and leave eventually to be with Elliot"

She sighed "Trevor I would never do that. I love you, I mean it when I say it. I don't want anybody else, you have been nothing but amazing and loving to me. You took time off and did everything you could to help me remember, so why would I walk away and let you go just like that."

"You're right, I'm sorry for being so jealous and inse-" he started.

She cut him off by pressing her lips to his and pushing him onto his back "shh, don't talk, just touch me" she whispered.

His hand trailed up the side of her body and he watched as she arched her back "your wish is my command."

...

Olivia sat on the ground, keeping an eye on the twins who were playing with their toys and crawling about, she had a cushion beneath her and one hand rested on her tiny bump while the other held her phone to her ear. She listened as Alex, Casey and Eva filled her in on what they've been up to over the last week.

A week had passed and Olivia had fallen into a great routine with Trevor, the babies and even with Alicia. They had gotten to know each other a bit better and Alicia was actually a nice person, Olivia found her company pleasant. Bethany still didn't like Olivia and she didn't try to hide it, she made it very clear and dismissed everything Olivia said.

Olivia was irritated by her but refused to let her stress her out, especially since she was pregnant, she didn't want any complications. So she simply ignored Bethany and focused on everyone but her, not paying her any mind.

"So Trevor said that your memory is back and that you remember everything, what's it like?" Eva asked over the phone.

Olivia pursed her lips "about that..." she looked around, checking that Trevor wasn't in earshot "I may have lied."

"YOU WHAT?!" Casey Shrieked

"Look Trevor was feeling insecure and jealous about the whole Elliot situation and I was tired of him trying to get my memory back, so I decided to tell him that I remember everything." she sighed "I remember a lot, but the reason I didn't want the baby is still a blur to me."

Alex let out a breath "Liv do you really think its a good idea to lie to him about this?"

She shrugged "I'm doing it for him, I hate not remembering but I don't think my memory is ever going to come back completely. So instead of constantly pondering on that, I just want to move forward, focus on us and the kids."

"What if he finds out?" Eva asked.

"I'll handle it, he's so happy right now, he hasn't stopped smiling since I told him and I don't want to take that away from him, I've caused enough pain."

"that doesn't answer the question. What if he finds out and decides that he doesn't trust you anymore" Alex pipped up.

"I'm doing this for us, he will understand that."

Alex scoffed "no you're doing because it's easier to give up and stop trying to remember, it's easier for you that's why you're doing it."

"So what if I want to take the easy way out. Nobody is getting hurt!" she spat.

Trevor came down the stairs and stopped when he heard her speaking to someone, he stood silently and listened. Hearing only the last few snippets of her conversation.

"What about Elliot, what if you come back and Trevor leaves for Oregon, and you have a moment of weakness with Elliot? We all know you still love him." Alex arguing, trying to make Olivia see reason.

She scoffed "this has nothing to do with Elliot. I don't want him in any way, yes I love him but I love Trevor too. I don't want to lose him and I'm not going to put myself in a position to lose him. It's better this way, because I know Trevor would have gone to Oregon when we returned and he would have spent everyday wondering if I've chosen Elliot over him, this way he doesn't have to worry about that. He just needs to know that I love him and that I don't want anybody else." she sighed "a white lie won't hurt him, I'm doing this to put his mind at ease, I'm doing this for Trevor."

"So you promise that coming back here and seeing Elliot while Trevor is gone won't change things?" Casey asked, sounding nervous and doubtful.

"I can't promise that, but I can try to prevent it from happening. Plus I'll have the twins with me and you all, to keep me company and get my mind off him." she shrugged

Trevor came downstairs and gave her a tight lipped smile, he wasn't sure what he had just overheard but he was pissed because it sounded like she was hiding things from him. He walked over to her and pressed a kiss to her forehead "I'm going out for a while, you want anything?"

She shook her head, placing her hand over her speaker "no thanks honey"

"I'll be back in the next hour, call me if you need anything." he said before straightening up.

Olivia frowned "Trevor, kiss me."

He leaned down again, gently pressing his lips to her own, he was about to pull away when he felt her nibbling on his bottom lip, begging for entrance into his mouth. As much as he wanted to get out of the house, he could not deny her, not when she was kissing him like this.

She pulled him down, forcing him to kneel in front of her while she claimed his lips. She had completely forgotten about the call she was on, she only had one thing on her mind and it was dragging him up to their bedroom.

Trevor groaned into her mouth, feeling his entire body reacting to their kiss, his hands instinctively started to travel down her body. He pulled her closer and allowed his tongue to explore her mouth, rubbing against her own and letting her know that he wanted the same thing she did.

Noah looked over at his parents and noticed the phone on the floor, he instantly crawled over and took hold of it. He pressed the phone to his ear, letting out a giggle when he heard the voices of the three women on the other end.

Alex heard the toddlers laughter and shook her head "Noah, where's your mother?"

"momma with dadda" he responded.

Casey smirked "are they close by?"

"uh huh" he nodded before crawling over to his parents.

Madison joined him and nudged her mother before stretching her arms out to her "up"

Olivia eased out of their intoxicating kiss and gave Trevor a sheepish smile "duty calls."

He let out a laugh before reaching for Noah "what are you doing with mom's phone?"

Noah shrugged before cuddling into his father's arms. Olivia reached for the phone and pressed it to her ear, hearing the three women laughing on the other end "did you three tell them to disturb us?"

"Yes because we weren't finished speaking to you. Trevor can wait" Alex teased.

Olivia let out a laugh "you three are horrible, you won't even give us a minute alone"

"I'm starting to see where the twins learnt it from" Trevor added while tickling Noah.

Olivia nodded "I'm sure they taught them." she put the phone on speaker before reaching for Madison's hand and placing it on her bump "I think I just felt the baby move" she gasped.

"is baby?" Maddie asked.

"yes princess, the baby is moving" Trevor smirked "well honey, you are around 21 weeks in so you should start to feel flutters" he smiled.

All three women cooed on the phone when they heard Olivia get choked up "aww honey, your baby is just letting you know that it's growing well in there"

She sniffed "I know... It's just, it felt so soft, like a little butterfly flutter"

He pressed a kiss to her forehead "they'll become more regular now and I can't wait."

"I'm not sure if it's hormones but I really love you and we need to put the twins to bed soon for their afternoon nap." she said with a mischievous grin.

Noah pouted "me not sleep"

Trevor let out a laugh "we'll see about that" he smirked "I'll take them for a walk while you relax a bit, that should knock them right out."

She shrugged while kissing Madison's cheeks "okay, but I'm joining you, because I'm getting cabin fever"

"Trevor she wanted to put the twins down because she's horny" Alex said with a loud clack of laughter.

"I am very much aware, and I do plan on helping her with that once we get back. I want her to get as much fresh air as possible because when we do return she won't be leaving our bedroom until tomorrow." he teased.

Olivia scoffed "that is wishful thinking, we have two kids that will go insane if we stay in our bedroom all day"

Casey smirked "and soon you'll be adding baby number three to the mix and that's going to be even more exhausting"

Eva let out a breath "Liv are you ready to have three little ones running around and driving you crazy?"

A massive smile tugged at her lips "I am ready, I can't wait"

Trevor let out a laugh "neither can I... I can already picture this baby looking like you"

"I hope it looks like you, you're so handsome" she smirked, reaching up for a kiss "I love you"

"I love you too babe" he whispered, closing the space between them.

"Hanging up now" Alex muttered when she heard the sound of kissing.

* * *

**_Okay so I'm going to start off by saying, I'm so sorry for the delay in updating. I've just started working again and it's been hectic trying to fall into a proper schedule._**

**_I've been working from home but the amount of jobs I've had to finish left me in a bit of a mess. So this is the most I could write for a week, because it's been _****_insanity._** **_I will try my best to write some more and get it updated sooner next time._**

**_Also a bit of a side note that has nothing to do with the book, I recently got engaged to my girlfriend. So that's a win and the celebrations did distract me just a little bit from writing._**

**_Nevertheless I'm back and I decided to throw this little curve ball your way, hopefully you don't hate me too much._**

**_Let me know what your thoughts are on this chapter, and leave some reviews. They always get me hyped to write the next chapter._**


	60. Chapter 60

**Open Cards.**

Olivia let out a soft sigh before slowly making her way out of the bed, she checked and ensured that Trevor was still asleep. He was knocked out and she couldn't help smiling at the fact that she had worn him out.

"you've still got it Benson" she whispered to herself as she walked into the bathroom. She grabbed a robe and slipped into it, checking her appearance in the mirror.

The woman she saw was unfamiliar to her, long brunette hair hung past her shoulders and her skin had a glow that Trevor referred to as her pregnancy glow. She had gained some weight but she figured that came with being pregnant, and she had the cutest little swell at her midsection. She still could not believe she was pregnant, she was going to have a baby four months from now.

Her hand moved down to her little bump and she bit her lip "I'm sorry for not wanting you baby, I'm so sorry for planning on aborting you. I regret that I felt that way, but I can't explain why to you. I don't know why I did it, why I was so upset about it, about you. Because I love you right now, I love you more than I expected to."

She sniffed softly "We have a check up booked for when we get back home but your daddy won't be there with us because he has to go to Oregon for work. I promise I'll keep you safe while he's gone" she smiled "he loves you so much, he can't wait to meet you. I've never met a man who loves his children as much as your daddy loves you and the twins."

A dull thud hit her hand and she let out a soft gasp "is this your way of letting me know that you agree?" she smirked "come on, let's go eat something, you must be starving, because I am."

She made her way out of the bathroom and did a quick check on Trevor, seeing that he was still asleep. She padded out of the bedroom silently, slipping into the room the twins were in, a smile spreading on her lips when she saw Madison laying awake in her crib. She scooped the toddler up, and checked on Noah who was still asleep before going downstairs.

Madison cuddled into her embrace and laid her head on her shoulder "momma me cold."

She pressed a kiss to her forehead "come on, let's get you covered up" she said softly, grabbing the baby blanket that was lying on the sofa.

Olivia placed her down in her swing in the kitchen and drapped the blanket over her "I'm going to fix something to eat and then you and I can head up to bed, okay princess?"

She nodded "otay momma."

Olivia moved around the kitchen and prepared a quick meal for herself and then moved to the living room. She gave Maddi a bottle filled with milk she had pumped, and kept an eye on the toddler as she ate.

After drinking her milk Madison let out a yawn and cuddled up in her mother's arms. Olivia kissed the top of her head "go to sleep princess, mommy is right here" she whispered, her eyes welling up with tears.

That word was starting to cut her more and more, because all her life she had dreamed of the perfect family and now she had that. She was finally a mother, but she felt like a failure everytime she looked at her children and still didn't remember everything about them. Her guilt was starting to eat her alive, she had lied to Trevor and told him she remembered every little detail, she said she remembered it all to get him to stop stressing and now she regretted it because she couldn't go ask him things about their kids that she didn't remember.

This memory loss was hitting her harder than she let on. She laid up most nights and cried her eyes out because she wanted so badly to remember her life, she wanted her life back. She was relieved that most of her memories were resurfacing, but there was still a few things she couldn't remember. She wanted to know what everybody else knew, plus she had a nagging thought of Eva and Thomas's breakup. It was partially her fault but she didn't know how she was involved, what they were hiding, but it must have been big for them to have broken up because of it.

She snapped to reality when her phone began ringing and she quickly answered, not checking the caller ID.

"Benson" she whispered, it was a habit.

He let out a laugh "Stabler"

She let out a breath "Elliot, hey..."

"You weren't expecting a call from me were you?" he said.

She looked down at Madison, who was asleep in her arms "no I wasn't... I figured you never wanted to speak to me again."

He took a sip of the drink he was nursing at the bar and sighed "I could never not speak to you. You're my best friend"

"You're mine too... But you realise we'll never be more than that right?" she asked, wanting to clear things up between them.

"Yeah. I still think you're making a mistake though, life gave you a second chance to-"

"To be better. To be a better mother, a better wife Elliot. I can't remember much but what I do know is that I wasn't always the wife Trevor deserved. I'm going to change that, I'm doing this for him and our kids."

He scoffed "he never deserved you... I love you Liv"

"So does he. That man has been nothing but great to me, he loves me and he proves it everyday" she bit her lip, a tear making its escape from her eyes "I'm not leaving him Elliot. I love him"

"I get it" he sighed "I just thought things could be different for us this time"

She shook her head "maybe its just not meant to be. You've got your family and I've got mine, and I love them, I don't want to lose them ever."

He nodded "I understand. I'm sorry for bothering you Olivia"

"El we can still be fri-" she stopped talking when she heard a beep on the other side of the line.

He hung up on her, making her feel guilty for doing what they both knew was the right thing.

She sighed "well he hasn't changed at all, still can't control that temper" she whispered.

After a few minutes of silence Olivia finally made her way upstairs, tucking Madison in and ensuring that she was settled before going back to bed. She cuddled up and allowed a smile to grace her face when Trevor instinctively wrapped his arm around her.

"I missed you" he mumbled, his voice laced with sleep.

She let out a laugh "I was downstairs, I got a late night snack in, and pumped a bit for Maddy." she bit her lip, not sure whether to tell him about the call.

"Okay, I love you" he whispered, before pulling her closer and dosing off again.

Letting out a soft sigh, she decided to let him sleep, knowing that he was exhausted. She would speak to him in the morning and tell him about the call, the last thing she wanted was to keep things from him. Keeping secrets was how she ended up like this in the first place, she had been sneaking around. Planning an abortion without his knowledge and then she got into a massive accident that took away two years worth of memories.

She laid there, with his arms around her and realised that the accident, the memory loss and all the other things that happened, had saved their marriage. Trevor was going to leave her, she knew that if she came home after having an abortion that her husband was going to leave. He had made himself very clear, being honest from beginning to end, she always knew where she stood with him because he voiced his thoughts. Something she hardly did, that was what caused problems for them, her never speaking up until it was all bottling out.

"go to sleep Liv" Trevor whispered, his eyes still closed "I can feel you getting stressed."

She placed her head on his chest "I can't sleep... My mind won't shut up"

He pressed a kiss to her forehead "what's going on in that pretty little head of yours babe?"

She sighed "Most of our arguments were because I never spoke up, I always kept quiet and acted okay until it all came bottling out."

"Liv I always knew you weren't the best at expressing yourself and I never held it against you. I didn't force you to speak because I knew you would do it as soon as you were ready, we're different babe, I'm more open, always speaking my mind, where you're more kept to yourself." he explained, running his hand over her bump.

"I know but I don't want to be like that, I don't wanna keep things away from you. Do you know about your business partner kissing me? Because I remember Alex and I arguing because she thought I allowed it. I didn't I was caught off guard." she whispered, a nervous look on her face "I was scared to tell you."

"You did tell me about it, a short while after we came to New York, and I was pissed, I wanted to kill him but you helped calm me down. You always knew how to calm me down" he said with a smile.

Olivia sighed "okay then I should probably tell you that I lied to you, when I said that I remember everything. I remember most of us, but not everything. Like I still don't know why I wanted an abortion, I still can't remember what our special place was but I do remember us talking about it while I was pregnant with the twins. I remember our wedding, but it's a blurred out scene and I can't really remember us finding out about the twins."

He ran his hand up her back "I knew you couldn't remember everything because yesterday when I said that Lukas was going to pick Alicia up you seemed confused. Plus I overhead you on the phone with the girls when I came downstairs, you said that you just wanted me to stop stressing and I get it. I was a bit overbearing, constantly trying to force the memories out of you, but what I have noticed is that they come back in the moments where you're most at peace or happiest."

"So you're not angry at me?" she asked nervously.

He shook his head "honey it's okay. This is hard for both of us, I'll do more damage by getting pissed at every little thing that goes wrong. Can we just both agree to be honest and open with each other from now? No more secrets."

"No more secrets" she said with a smile, leaning up to peck his lips, she pulled away after a minute and pursed her lips "since we're not keeping secrets I should probably tell you that Elliot called me. I was going to wait until morning to tell you, but since we're both awake and talking I figured now is a good time."

He nodded, feeling himself get a bit angry "what did he want?"

"Me. He wanted me to know that he loves me and that this is life's way of giving us a second chance to be together and do things differently." she explained, feeling his entire body tense beside her.

He released his hold on her and sat up "what did you say?"

She sat up beside him, taking his hand into her own "that I love you. I'm not going anywhere, the only second chance I got was a second chance to love you and raise our babies together."

He turned to her and sighed "I'm going to kill him if he even tries to make a move on y-"

"He won't. He's angry at me and by the sounds of it, he might never speak to me again. I hate that I'm losing my best friend but if he can't respect my marriage then it's for the best that he stays away." she placed a kiss to the back of his hand "I have all the man I need right here"

"Why did he have to go and ruin things, we were all getting along great. Hell I was starting to actually trust him. You and Kathy had finally managed to become friends." he said with a frown.

She shrugged "he's not thinking straight right now. He'll come around eventually and realise how stupid this all was and then things will go back to the way they should be."

"So about the baby, don't you remember-" he started.

She shook her head "unfortunately not. I don't know why I wanted to do that. I wish I knew so that I could give you answers, so that I could get rid of some of the guilt I'm feeling."

He cupped her cheek gently, using his thumb to wipe her tears "you don't need to feel guilty, you're human. We all make mistakes. I've made tons of mistakes in the past too, so it's okay. We all make bad decisions, even you, even Olivia Langan."

A small smile tugged at her lips "I love the sound of that"

"So do I, and the best part is that it's going to sound like that for the rest of our lives." he said, pressing a soft kiss to her lips.

* * *

**_I am so sorry for the long wait for this update but it took me a while to figure out where I wanted to go with this chapter..._**

**_A massive reveal is coming in the next chapter so prepare yourselves._**

**_Also let me know your thoughts on this chapter. Reviews are always welcome. _**


	61. Chapter 61

**Total Recall.**

**_Trigger warning: mentions of rape and sexual assualt. _**

**_Two weeks later:_**

Olivia and Trevor had enjoyed their last week in North Carolina, spending as much time with family as possible. They returned after a week and were both sad that Trevor had to leave for Oregon soon. They spent the whole day together with the twins, not wanting to miss a second together.

The evening Trevor had to fly out, the twins were asleep so Mary and Eva kept an eye on them while Olivia, Alex and Casey drove him to the airport. Alex drove while Trevor and Olivia sat in the backseat, cuddled up and whispering sweet nothings into each others ears.

Olivia cried when Trevor had to leave, she hugged him tightly and gave him a massive kiss, not caring who saw them. They whispered their 'I love you's' before he finally left to board his flight. Olivia sobbed as she watched him leave, her body shaking as her tears fell, her hormones were definitely playing a role in her actions.

The girls managed to get her back home and were surprised to see how sad their friend was without Trevor. She got a call from him as soon as he landed and spoke to him for over an hour, already missing his presence around her. Trevor missed her too, ensuring that he called her as soon as he got to their house. It felt empty without her and the twins there, the silence was driving him insane.

It had been a week since he left and Olivia was still really sad about it, she was a lot more emotional than anybody expected her to be. Only smiling when the twins did something cute or when Trevor called, they spoke for hours.

Alex sat beside Olivia on the sofa and nudged her "are you okay Liv? You haven't said a word in the last hour."

She shrugged, running her hand over her bump "I miss Trevor, and the twins"

"The twins will be back soon honey" Eva said with a smile "they just went for a bit of fun in the park with Mary and Thomas. He hasn't seen them since you returned from Carolina"

Olivia scoffed "who's fault is that? He's the one that decided to act like a child and get angry at me for keeping a secret that I don't even remember even keeping. He's the one that refused to come by and spend time with the twins, he's been rejecting all of my calls so I gave up."

Casey sighed "he's just in shock. It's a big deal so he doesn't know how to handle it, give him time and he'll come around."

"whatever, he just pisses me off" she said with a frown, getting up from the sofa "I'm getting some ice-cream, do you girls want?"

Alex stood to her feet "come on I'll help you."

They made their way into the kitchen, both women moving to the freezer. Olivia opened it and smirked "Cookies and Cream, Trevor loves that flavour"

"I agree with him on that, it tastes amazing" Alex said with a laugh while reaching for the pint of cookies and cream ice-cream.

Olivia hit her hand away from it "that's the last one, I think I deserve it"

Alex laughed "fine, but only because you're pregnant and the baby is being named after me."

"That's wishful thinking, we don't have a name yet." she sighed "I have an appointment in two days and Trevor might not be here for it. They're going to try to find out the gender of the baby, I don't want to do that without him."

"we could always go with you,make it a girls trip" she offered, placing a hand Olivia's shoulder.

"Sure sounds great" she whispered, a sad look covering her face.

They made their way silently into the livingroom and handed the other two women pints of ice-cream with a spoon for each of them. Olivia sat down and cuddled up with one of the pillows, holding it close as she ate the ice cream.

She felt her tears escape her eyes and sniffled "I miss him so much"

Alex wrapped her arms around her friend "oh honey he'll be home soon, just another week and he'll be in your arms."

"we haven't spoken in two days because he's been having back to back meetings, the twins are constantly asking for him. They miss their dad and I miss my husband, these hormones are driving me insane and I can't sleep at night because my memories keep coming back. I've had four panic attacks in the last two days and I just need him here already" Olivia sobbed out.

Alex motioned for Casey to get a few tissues, she had never seen Olivia get this worked up. She was full out sobbing, her entire body shaking as her tears fell, they knew this would be difficult for her. She and Trevor had not been separated for longer than a few hours since the accident and suddenly she had to go two weeks without him. He was the person who always calmed her down and now he wasn't there with her.

Eva grabbed her phone and dialed Trevor's number, listening to it ring "he's not answering."

Olivia placed her hand on her bump and sobbed "the baby is t-thrashing"

"you need to calm down Liv" Alex whispered, rubbing her back in a soothing manner.

Casey handed her a few tissues "come on, let's go lie down for a bit, we'll help you into one of Trevor's shirts and try to call him again."

The three women helped her up to the main bedroom and helped her change into one of her husband's button down shirts, they then all cuddled up on the bed. Comforting her until her cries subsided into hiccups, her hand running over her bump in a soothing motion.

"Are you feeling a bit better?" Casey asked gently.

She sniffled "this smells like him" she whispered.

Eva wrapped her arms around her pregnant friend and pressed a kiss to the side of her head "get some sleep, we'll be right here, we'll wake you up if he calls back."

...

Alex sat down with a thud and let out a breath "her hormones are kicking her ass with this pregnancy."

"She never got worked up like when she was pregnant with the twins" Casey added, handing Alex a cup of coffee before settling down beside her.

Alex wrapped her arm around Casey and pressed a kiss to her lips "thanks babe"

"No problem" Casey said with a smile.

Eva sighed "ugh you two make me sick."

"Only because you're single" Casey teased.

"Yeah... I just can't wait till Trevor gets back so I can go back home and never see Thomas again." she said with a frown.

"You don't mean that" Alex said with a sigh "you love him"

"so what?" she scoffed "I love him, but he doesn't want to be with me. He left me just like that, without even doubting for a second, that's how little he felt for me."

"That's not true" Thomas said as he walked into the living room with two sleeping babies in his arms.

She looked up at him and swallowed hard "Thomas I-"

Thomas sighed "can you help me lay these two down please?" he asked.

She nodded, silently following him upstairs, she did a quick check on Olivia who was still asleep before walking into the nursary "how have you been?"

"Shit. Everything has been shit these last few weeks, I made a massive mistake. I love you Eva, I was just shocked at what I found out, I'm so sorry" he sighed, laying Noah down while Eva laid Madison down.

She covered the toddler with her blankets and sighed "you hurt me Thomas... You really made me feel like I was nothing to you, because of a secret that wasn't even mine to tell. There's nothing I could do about it, I had to respect Olivia's wishes."

"I know. I know because I wanted to tell her what it was, but I couldn't even look her in the eye, because I didn't want to make things worse. She was a mess before the accident and I didn't want to see her like that again. That's why I'm not going to say anything" he covered Noah and pressed a kiss to the little boy's forehead.

Eva sniffled, feeling herself get emotional "you have no idea how hard it's been for us, Case and I have been keeping this secret for so long because we respect Olivia. We want her to handle it on her own terms and we're not telling her because that might just make things worse."

"You're great friends, for having her back like this" he sighed, reaching for her hand "I'm so sorry Evangeline, for hurting you and making you feel unloved. I do love you, I have been miserable without you by my side, I miss you and I've been wanting to text you ever since I walked out. I made a massive mistake, I won't hold it against you if you can't forgive me." he said sincerely, running his thumb over the back of her hand.

She reached up and cupped his cheek "we can work through this" she whispered, pressing her lips to his "but you've got to promise that you won't just storm out when we have issues, that you'll actually try to work it out."

"I promise kitten" he whispered.

"good and also never call me on my full name again" she laughed before closing the space between them.

He wrapped his arms around her waist and smiled into their kiss "noted."

...

The pair came downstairs after a quick roll in the sheets in Eva's room, they both had flustered cheeks and massive smiles on their faces.

Olivia had woken up after a while and came downstairs, her nap had helped her calm down. She felt a lot better now and was actually talking to the girls without looking like she wanted to cry.

Trevor still hadn't called back but she figured he was busy and would call when he had a free minute. She missed him, but she wasn't feeling as lonely and lost as she did the afternoon, she was okay.

Alex and Casey smirked as they watched Eva and Thomas come downstairs with guilty looks on their faces. Alex raised an eyebrow at the pair "you two look cosy, I take you made up."

"You could say that" giggled Eva.

Olivia scoffed "honey go get yourself a glass of water, you're completely flustered."

Thomas sat down and gave Olivia a sheepish smile "I owe you an apology. I've been an ass to you over the last while, I'm so sorry"

She waved him off "Thomas its okay. You were clearly in shock, I'm okay as long as you're not hurting Eva."

He nodded "I'll try my best to keep her happy. I don't want to hurt her ever again."

"Now that's how a man should speak" Casey teased, tossing him a beer "on a brighter note, have you heard from your brother, we've been trying to contact him. His wife and kids miss him"

Thomas sighed "he spoke to me two days ago, said that he had a ton of meetings and hearings to attend. We spoke for about ten minutes before he had to leave to go to a court hearing, the witness was a bit reluctant to speak at first."

Olivia sighed "his baby has been going insane and keeping me up at night"

Thomas chuckled "so that little one is causing trouble already?"

"when Trevor is around the baby behaves" she said with a laugh.

Eva came back into the livingroom with her phone in her hand "speak of the devil, here he is" she teased handing her phone to Olivia.

Her face lit up instantly "hey stranger" she smiled.

He smiled widely at the sight of her "hi beautiful. I've missed you so much"

"I missed you too babe" she bit her lip "your beard is growing out... I like it"

He smirked "mm I was going to shave it off in the morning"

She shook her head "don't, it's hot. I want to see it when you get home"

"Okay babe. Where are the kids?" he asked, placing the phone up against the kitchen wall so he could talk to her while preparing his dinner.

"The twins are asleep and the baby has been kicking my ass. Why didn't you call?" she asked watching him move around the kitchen.

He sighed, tugging his t-shirt off "I have been insanely busy, I'm sorry for not calling honey. I got home at the craziest hours and just crashed or spent hours going over files."

She bit her lip when his naked torso came into view "are you trying to torture me?"

He furrowed his eyebrows "how would I be doing that?"

"Put on a shirt, you're driving me insane and you're not here so I don't want to get worked up." she sighed "when are you coming home?"

"Soon baby, and I would put on a shirt but it's damn hot in here. We should really look into getting air-conditioning, because it feels like a heatwave in this kitchen." he said with a laugh "are you wearing my shirt?"

She nodded "yeah, it smells like you, it helps me sleep." she sighed "when you say soon, how long does range to?"

He reached for the phone and shrugged "sometime in next week, maybe Thursday."

"But I miss you" she pouted "Thursday is so far"

"I miss you too Livia" he sighed "it's so hard to sleep without you in my arms."

She ran her hand over her bump "it's hard for me too"

Trevor was about to say something but stopped when he heard a knock on the door. He turned to her and scowled "give me a second baby, I just have to get the door. I'll be right back."

She nodded watching him move out of view, she could see the decor of their home and it was beautiful, minimal and exactly to her taste. She loved it.

Trevor saw Aiden at the door and let him in, knowing that he came by to pick up a few things that had been shipped to the wrong address. He led him into the living room and turned to him "it's upstairs, I'll get it real quick."

He nodded "sure man. Where's your wife?"

He motioned to the phone "she's on the call. Babe I'll be right back, I just need to get some things upstairs."

Olivia shrugged "no problem, I'll be here."

Aiden reached for the phone when Trevor left the living room and smirked "hi Olivia. Long time no see, you look beautiful."

She gasped when she saw him, the smug look on his face. She dropped the phone and burst into tears instantly, shocking everyone around her. She shook from head to toe and sobbed, gasping for air.

Casey, Alex and Eva rushed up to her while Thomas went upstairs when the twins started crying. Alex reached for the phone and scowled at him "where the hell is Trevor?"

He shrugged "he's upstairs, pass the phone back to Olivia"

She scoffed "screw you!"

Olivia sobbed "he-"

"Shh, I know, it's okay" Casey whispered, holding her close.

Trevor returned and heard the commotion on the phone, he handed Aiden the package and took the phone "Alex why is Olivia crying? What's going on?"

Alex sighed "she's just in shock, please get her to calm down"

She took the phone to Olivia and placed her hand on her shoulder "Liv, Trevor is here he wants to speak to you"

Olivia shook her head, her tears flowing "I remember..."

"What do you remember baby? Tell me" he asked gently, trying to remain as calm as possible.

"He raped me, that's why I wanted the abortion" she sobbed out "I thought it was his"

* * *

**Oop. There it is. I hope y'all don't hate me too much, and also for the sake of my own sanity I'm not going into details about the rape scene.**

**Let me know what your thoughts are on this chapter. Reviews are always appreciated. **


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